And God Gave Me You…
Chapter 1
Author's Note: Law & Order SVU and its characters are not mine. If they were, Chris Meloni would still be in it and Warren Leight wouldn't have laid a finger on this show.
So this in honor of season/series finale season, this is my take on how the series finale of SVU should be when it comes. I got this idea as I was watching the finale of the Voice and the eventual winner was singing Blake Shelton's song, "God gave me you." As I listened to that song, this story took shape.
Sometimes, we have to know when to stop fighting and to let go…
. . .
Kathy went into their living room, carrying some laundry to fold, on her way up the stairs. As she passed by, she saw Elliot with their almost 6 year old, Eli sleeping on his lap. Elliot hadn't heard her come in and he seemed just focused on the tv where he had the local news on.
Kathy turned to look at the screen and she realized why Elliot seemed so oblivious.
"Manhattan SVU detectives Olivia Benson and Nick Amaro arrested a man they would only identify as Joe in line with the series of rapes that had been occurring in the the West Village. When asked for her comment Detective Benson only had this to say:
We ask the citizens of Manhattan especially of the West Village to be patient with us. We are questioning the suspect as I speak and investigating all evidence. As soon as we come to a solid conclusion, we will release a statement. In the meantime, we caution all women especially those who live in the area of the West Village and nearby to be extra vigilant and to report any suspicious activity or behavior at once. Thank you.
Kathy watched Elliot's face from where she stood. She could see anguish there and…what was that? Longing. There was longing there and…and…need. And, she swallowed hard... and then there was the strongest emotion of all and the truest there, love. She could see it. She could not deny it. He missed his ex-partner. He still loved his ex-partner.
Sudden tears pricked at Kathy's eyes and what she found a week ago came crawling back into her mind.
She had been organizing their closet and she had been going through old checkbooks, old receipts, old bills, letters, notes – going through them – discarding what could be discarded and organizing the ones that needed keeping.
It was in the midst of this sorting that she saw it. An agreement of refinancing their house back in 2010. She had been confused. They already had a mortgage on their house. Did Elliot take out a second mortgage?
So she had called the mortgage company and found that he indeed had taken a second mortgage on their home to the tune of $250,000. She probed further and she was able to find out that Elliot had already repaid it all.
After that conversation with the mortgage company, Kathy had racked her brain as to a reason why Elliot might need $250,000? She couldn't think of any reason until she remembered that was the year that Olivia had been wrongfully accused of murdering a guy who was a member of a biker gang and had been put it in jail for a little bit. Elliot had told her that bail had been set at $250,000.
The mortgage company officer had told Kathy that they were able to give Elliot a check of $25,000 at the onset of the refinancing. $25,000 was 10 percent of $250,000 – the exact amount needed to cover bail for Olivia.
It was then that it sank in, he had mortgaged their house to bail Olivia out. The man had risked his family being homeless, if anything went wrong. He had risked it just to bail Olivia out.
That was it. It was then that Kathy realized how deep Elliot's feelings ran for Olivia. Finally, after so long, it sank in. And call her crazy, but she wasn't angry. She was sad yes, but she wasn't angry.
That was a week ago. And tonight as she watched him watch the news, it sank in. He really loved Olivia but he was never going to do anything about it. Not unless, she let him go. Because she knew, he'd never be the one to walk away. He was that kind of guy.
Her tears were nearly blinding her but still Kathy stepped out of the shadows and asked him softly, "You really love her don't you?"
Startled, Elliot did a double take then replied, sighing, "Kathy, can we not start please?"
He was so used to fighting with Kathy about Olivia and now that they weren't partners anymore, now that he was no longer with SVU he didn't want to have to fight anymore with her about Liv.
Kathy set the laundry basket down and sat next to Elliot on the couch. She faced her husband and said, "I'm not starting anything, Elliot. I just need to know please, you love her right?"
"Why does it matter? I don't see her anymore. I don't even talk to her anymore."
"Because it does matter, Elliot. If you do love her, then why are you here with me?" Kathy asked painfully.
"Because you're my wife, Kathy. I made a vow to stay with you for better or worse."
"Oh, Elliot."
"What?"
"Wrong answer." Kathy told him, regretful and sad.
"Wrong answer? What do you mean?" Elliot asked her, puzzled but suddenly feeling sad too.
"I mean the right answer to that question is: Because I love you, Kathy."
"Oh. But Kathy that goes without saying." Elliot tried to backtrack.
"Does it?"
"Yeah, it does."
"Elliot, can I ask you something?" Kathy questioned him.
"Sure, Kath."
"Would you have gone back to me if I didn't get pregnant with Eli?"
Elliot dropped his eyes to the boy sleeping soundly on his lap and his love for Eli suddenly surged then. He could not and would not imagine a world – a life without Eli. But that wasn't the question.
"Elliot?" Kathy prodded, looking at him.
Elliot turned off the TV then and sighed. "I don't know, Kath. I mean you did get pregnant and I'm here, so…I don't regret that."
"I'm sure you don't Elliot, but that isn't the question. The question is if I wasn't pregnant with Eli would you have come back to me."
Elliot sighed again and asked, "Why are you suddenly asking me all these questions, Kath?"
"Please, Elliot, just answer them."
Elliot looked down once more and with his eyes still downcast, he replied, "I really don't know Kathy. I wish I could say, yes, but I don't know. I honestly don't know."
"El? Have you been happy since you turned your papers in? I mean now that you're in the private sector you get more time with us. But I have this bad feeling in the pit of my stomach that you're not happy. That something is missing with you. Am I right?"
Elliot shrugged. "I do miss SVU sometimes but then I remember all the bad things that I see there everyday and when I do, I don't anymore."
"I'm not talking about the job Elliot."
Elliot looked up at her and suddenly his blue eyes were full of emotion. "Kathy, why all the questions all of a sudden?"
At his words, Kathy smiled sadly and started to walk away. But then she turned around again and told him, "Elliot if you only saw your face as you watched the news…."
That was all she said. And she turned around again and went upstairs leaving Elliot staring after her.
. . .
Two days later
"Excuse me, but can you tell where I might find Detective Olivia Benson?"
Amanda had been intent on finishing her pile of DD5s that she wasn't really noticing anything or anyone around her. So, she had been startled when a female voice suddenly addressed her.
She looked up and saw a blonde woman in her 40s standing in front of her. Immediately, Amanda went into detective mode and asked, "She's not here right now, but maybe I can help you?"
The blonde shook her head and replied with a small smile, "No, it has to be her."
"Ma'am if you're in trouble…"
"No, I'm not." The woman said, cutting Amanda off. "This is kind of a personal matter actually."
A wary look came about Amanda's face then and she was about to tell the woman to come back another time when all at once John Munch's voice exclaimed behind her, "Kathy! What are you doing here? I mean, how are you?"
Kathy gave a little chuckle and replied, "Hi John. I'm glad I haven't been forgotten yet."
John chuckled. "Forget a gorgeous woman like you? Never!"
"Thanks." Kathy replied, still smiling.
"So what brings you here?" John asked her. "How's El…"
But before John could finished his sentence, Olivia had walked in and stopped dead in her tracks. "Kathy! What are you doing here? Is El….is he…." A fearful look came upon Olivia's face as her voice trailed off unable to voice out the terrible thoughts that sprang to mind.
"Hi, Olivia." Kathy greeted her. "Don't worry, he's okay."
She saw Olivia breathe a sigh of relief. But then a wary look came upon Olivia's face and Kathy could see her guard go up.
"Olivia, is there anywhere we can speak in private?"
Kathy could see Olivia hesitate. She was sure that Olivia was wondering what she was doing there. Truth be told, she wasn't too sure either why she was there. She knew she needed some answers. And she felt this was the place to find those answers.
She could see that Olivia was about to make an excuse so before Olivia could make something up, she spoke again, injecting urgency in her tone. "Please, Olivia."
Something in Kathy's tone got to Olivia and the next thing she knew she was nodding. "Okay. Um, there's a coffee shop around the corner, how about we meet there in about 20 minutes. I just need to pack up here."
"Great. Thanks, Olivia. I'll be waiting."
"Okay."
And with that, Kathy said goodbye to John and left.
. . .
Twenty minutes later, Olivia entered the coffee shop and found Kathy seated in a secluded corner of the store. She ordered a decaf and then proceeded to sit where Kathy sat.
For a moment, the two women only eyed each other in silence. But all of a sudden, Kathy could no longer take the silence and spoke up. "Thank you for coming, Olivia."
Olivia nodded and then asked once more, "Kathy, be honest with me, is he okay? I just have this bad feeling you wouldn't be here if he was."
Kathy decided to be direct. She felt that was the best approach with Olivia especially she wanted to get honest answers from her. Olivia had always been the guarded type.
"He misses you." Kathy told her husband's ex-partner.
Olivia snickered and replied sarcastically, "He has a funny way of showing it."
"I know you're probably mad…" Kathy started to answer back.
Olivia cut her off, shaking her head. "I was, I'm not anymore. I've moved on Kathy."
"Have you really?"
"I have a new partner."
"And how's that working out for you."
"Great."
"Really?"
"Yes, really."
"Okay, well I'm not here to argue about that." Kathy said.
"Really?" Again a sarcastic edge to Olivia's voice. "So please enlighten me what are you here about?"
"You know he had a nervous breakdown after he shot that girl? He had to go to a mental facility to recover."Kathy admitted.
Olivia's mouth suddenly went dry and when she opened her mouth to speak, her voice was practically a croak, "I didn't know that."
"He didn't want any of you to know."
"And now?"
"He's home. He's working again. He's better."
"That's good." Olivia replied, relief clearly showing on her face.
"But he's not great. He can't talk to me about what happened. Or about all the horrors he's seen in his job."
"I'm sorry."
"It's funny, I finally get what I want, and we're still not happy." Kathy confessed, her eyes full of sadness.
"What do you mean?" Olivia questioned.
"I mean, he finally has a job with reasonable hours, he no longer has a female partner that I'm constantly jealous of, but I can see that he isn't happy. I can feel his unhappiness."
"I'm sure that's not true, Kathy."
"It is, Olivia. I have to face it, you made him happy in a way I never could."
Olivia's breath hitched then and suddenly tears stung her eyes. She looked away and mumbled, "That's not true."
"Yes, it is. Olivia, I know about how he mortgaged our house for you. Elliot is in love with you."
Olivia gasped. She paused for a minute and then replied, "I, I'm sorry about that. I had nothing to do with…"
"I know you didn't. I know it was all Elliot. You'd never ask him to do that."
Olivia nodded and replied, "Still I'm sorry."
"Olivia, Elliot is so miserable right now. And the worst part is, he won't admit it."
"How do you know?" Olivia asked her.
"I just know. I can see it in his eyes. Two days ago, we saw you in the news and if you could have seen the expression on his face as he watched you on TV...it broke my heart."
"Why?"
"Olivia, he misses you."
"I don't know what to say, Kathy. I mean he left. Without a goodbye."
"He had a nervous breakdown Olivia."
"When did get back?" Olivia asked, looking concerned.
"He was in a facility in Connecticut for nearly 6 months." Kathy told her.
"Why didn't he call me after he got back?"
"Honestly? I asked him not to."
Olivia suddenly felt a stab of pain in her heart. "So why are you here now?"
"Because I love him and I just want to be happy."
"And?"
"He'll only be happy if he has you back."
"He knows where I am. All he has to do is pick up the phone."
"He won't do that." Kathy admitted.
"Why?"
"Because he thinks that contacting you would mean the end of our family."
"Is it?"
"No."
"So why don't you set him straight?"
"Because at this point, he won't believe me." Kathy confessed.
"So two things Kathy. Why don't you tell him otherwise and two what are you doing here?"
"I'm here because I need to know something from you before I can do what I need to do with Elliot."
"And what's that?" Olivia asked.
Kathy met Olivia's gaze head on then and no longer mincing any words, she took the plunge and asked, "Olivia, I need to know, do you love Elliot?"
. . .
To be continued….
So this is not going to be a long drawn out story. This probably going to be three chapters, four at the most. In any case, please enjoy and I will be working on the next chapter tomorrow. Please do review here and on Twitter: Jo_Bautista
For those waiting for It Happened One Night, I'm still rewatching SVU season 4, looking for that pivotal Season 4 moment. Once I've found it, I will update.
Thanks!