'Cause now again I've found myself
So far down, away from the sun
That shines into the darkest place
-3 Doors Down-

His black hair was trapped between his face and his pillow. Snores escaped his open mouth, but he was too deep in sleep to notice or care. There was a soft breeze that pushed back the thin curtains surrounding the window and soothed his exposed back. The tips of his fingers were resting on the other side of the king sized bed; his entire arm sprawled over the sheets.

Loud, careless footsteps raced up the stairs and bounded into his bedroom. Sirius stayed perfectly still, his chest rising and falling in a perfect rhythm right before two twin boys propelled themselves onto him. Sirius groaned, and shuffled himself under his pillow, trying in vain to escape them, but it was no use and he knew it.

"Mar!" He groaned, but she didn't come and save him. As usual, he was on his own.

So he inhaled sharply, grabbing his senses about him, and then he flipped over and surveyed the two boys. His grey eyes were blurred with traces of sleep still left over. The two boys in front of him were dark haired, with light blue eyes, and extraordinarily pale skin. They were about seven, but they could have both passed for nine.

Reaching forward, he seized them each in an arm and sighed. "What are you two up to?"

"Mum said it was time for you to wake up." Will, the one that had an extra freckle on his throat, declared arrogantly.

"Oh she did, did she?" Sirius scoffed at him.

Liam, the one who always seemed to have an easy grin on his face, nodded. "Mum said, you can't spend the whole day sleeping."

"Bah, that woman." Sirius rubbed his face. "Well tell her I'm going to shower and I'll be down in a minute. Alright?"

"Fine dad, but don't forget. You promised us you would take us to Diagon Alley today!" Will said pointing at him sternly.

Sirius laughed at the familiarity of the gesture. He scooped his sons up and kissed their foreheads. "I will, I will. Just let me wake up."

"Fine!"

He held onto them until they began to squirm. "Daaaaad!"

"Oh, you would like to go somewhere?" He played off innocently, rubbing his scratchy unshaven face on the sides of their faces.

"Oh let them go!" Grace rolled her eyes, leaning against the doorway haughtily.

Sirius did so with a bark laugh. The boys dashed out of the room, before his eyes turned to the 14 year old in front of him. "What are you all dressed up for?"

"I'm wearing normal clothes."

"Ah huh, then why are your eyes outlined, and your lips seem bigger."

"Its called make-up dad," Grace drawled with a heavy sigh, flipping her long dirty blonde hair over her shoulder. "You should know mum wears it."

He scowled looking at the length of her shorts and how form fitting her shirt was. "Yes well you are 14. Your mother is an adult. So wash that stuff off your face and put on a baggier shirt."

"Dad, I'm not going to put on a baggy shirt just because it gives boys feelings. It is not my problem how they think or feel. I should be able to dress however I want."

"You've been spending too much time with your Aunt Dorcas," He groaned, getting up off his bed. "Pick one, either you fix the shirt or you ditch the make-up. I don't care which one, but I don't care how misogynist it is. You are too young to wear make-up and wearing things to accent curves you don't even know exist."

Grace glowered at him, her head almost reaching his chest. "That's stupid!"

"That's life. Now where are you going?"

"I'm just going to go hang out with Harry and his friend Ron for a bit."

"Weasley right?"

"Yes, you've met him dad."

Sirius shrugged, running his hand through his shaggy dark hair. "Alright you can go. Remind Harry that he is supposed to go with Remus and I to next weeks Cannon's game."

"Oh he is perfectly aware," Grace said snottily. "He won't shut up about it."

"Okay, then mind what I said and go have fun." Sirius told her, kissing her temple and shifting into the bathroom.

Once he turned the water on, he heard her footsteps fade down the staircase. He smiled knowing she wouldn't listen to him. In fact Grace probably would probably do the exact opposite of what he had told her. It didn't make him happy that she didn't listen to him, but it made him happy to see what parts of himself were alive in her.

When he found out his girlfriend was pregnant, he panicked. Not just a normal panic either, but a full scale melt down. It wasn't unnatural; he had been only 21 at the time. He was young, and not at all ready for what was to come. For a year, he went back and forth, unsure if he really could handle being responsible for another living life form. She had been so perfect and so tiny; he didn't want to do anything to damage her. The thought that he could ruin a child or do what his parents did to him scared him to the core. It helped that Grace's mother had been so ready for it all. Marlene was born to be a mother and she shifted into the role with only a few minor bumps along the way. Her steadiness had rubbed off on him and settled the concerns that had been brewing in him. Until finally he saw he could do what his parents could never do, he could love his children.

As he stepped into the shower, Sirius shut the door behind him and let the warm jets of water slap him awake. Later on he was supposed to have dinner with Lily and James at their house with some of the old gang. If his memory was correct that included Amelia, Fabian, Caradoc and even Peter was planning to come. It was a nice thought to have a little get together. Of course once Lily brought it up and told Sirius he was coming, he didn't really have much of a choice to fight it, but it was still a good idea all the same.

In no time at all, Sirius shaved, brushed his teeth and changed. Downstairs, there were some leftovers from breakfast lying out for him, but his wife of seven years was nowhere to be found. Grabbing a plate he ate and glanced around his sunlit house. Marlene had taken the liberty of putting pictures of their family everywhere. Along the walls there were pictures of Grace, Harry and his little sister Ellie, growing up and occasionally playing with Alice and Frank's son Neville. Then there were pictures of Will and Liam chasing their godfathers around The Potter's spacious yard. Sirius smirked at the picture, seeing the laughs on James and Remus's faces. It had been the day Mrs. Potter had invited them all over for brunch, he remembered because they didn't leave until late the next morning.

A wave of watermelon and flowers breezed past him, and his enhanced animagus smelling caught onto it instantly. Before she came up to him, he was already smiling, his eyes locked on the gold band on his left hand.

Marlene came up from behind him, dropping her gardening gloves to the floor, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek bone. "Nice to see you in the land of the living."

"Why are you gardening? You hate gardening."

"Dorcas is helping so it isn't too bad." She mumbled, leaning against him as he held onto her hands.

Sirius kissed the inside of her wrist lightly. "Grace left. Where are the boys?"

"They are playing outside."

Sirius raised her arms above his neck and pulled her around his chair so she would sit on his lap. Marlene snorted at the gesture, but she was more than used to it. They'd lived together for 15 years and had been married for seven years. He'd never wanted to get married. It always seemed like a tedious gesture of an institution that always seemed destined to fail. Dorcas and Remus still weren't married though they'd been together longer than anyone else had. But there was just something about Marlene that was a game changer. She never suggested or asked for marriage. Most women would have, he knew that, but she never did. The only thing she ever was stern on was that he was a good father to their daughter, and then later on to their sons. She told him to be a better man than his father had ever been capable of being. She told him to be the man that she had always been in love with, and after a lot of work and support from the Marauder's he got there.

He had always heard people go on and on about not knowing what they would do with their lives if their significant other wasn't in it, but he'd been skeptical. How could anyone not be able to live their life just because one person wasn't in it? The answer was sitting on his lap, looking at him in a way only a woman who had known him for almost his entire life could. She was so vital to his being without her he would have never had any of this and he knew he would have never loved anyone else, not at least the way he loved her. Marlene had snuck up on him, and infected him, nothing was ever going to erase that.

Her chapstick coded lips, curled up into a smile and he found himself smiling in return. The week before they had gotten into a big fight over something he had said, but the forgiveness was clear on her fair face.

Sirius traced her cheekbones, kissing her lips lightly. "I missed you."

"What are you on about?" Marlene said, her hands resting on his chest. "I stayed with you all night."

"But you were gone in the morning." He pouted.

"I had to check my schedule to see when I'm working this week. They refuse to put up the same Healer schedule every week."

Sirius frowned. "That's inconvenient."

"It really is."

Marlene kissed him without warning. Her hands rising to grip his shoulders, his arms hugging around her, they held each other contently for a few moments. It wasn't an uncommon occurrence nor was it heated. The passion of their relationship had left when the hormones did, but what remained was deeper than that. Sirius had never thought that there could be anything attained from dating or falling in love, but his relationship with Marlene was proof that it was anything, but true.

When he eventually pulled away, and rested his forehead on hers, he sighed. Not out of disappointment or annoyance, but out of satisfaction.

"Well, I have to get back to Dora," Marlene got up despite his whines, "Don't forget to take the boys to Diagon. If I have to hear them complain about it for the rest of the week, you are sleeping on the couch again."

Sirius raised his hands in innocence. "I'll take them in an hour."

"You better," She made a face at him and walked away, her bare feet barely making a sound as she went. Her blonde hair bounced behind her, mixing with the light of the sun.

"BLACK!" One of the guards banged on the bars around his cell.

Sirius blinked, jumped and he looked around wildly. There was just a second, a mere instant the amused smile stayed on his face, before it dawned on him where he was. Sirius sunk back against the hot, unyielding brick wall and sighed. His eyes ached, and his stomach growled in hunger though he knew he wouldn't get dinner for another few hours, but even after all of these years his body still hadn't adapted.

Gone was the fresh shaven man, with a good night of sleep and a healthy physique.

Gone was the man with a family and wife.

And here to stay was a man with a sunken in face, dark circles and long unkempt hair.

This was a world where all of his friends, but one were dead, and all of society thought he was homicidal maniac. He had just been picturing an illusion; a bitter place where Dorcas, James, Lily and even Marlene had survived the war. And Peter hadn't betrayed them all.

A world he'd never get to live in.

His eyes were too dry to even build up any tears, and his jaw was too weak to lock together properly. Marlene's face still lingered in his mind, but he forced himself to forget it, knowing her image would come back to him later. That was the worst part, because he didn't want to remember how she died, how they all died, but living here he had to relieve their deaths every single day.

Ahead of him he saw the Minister of Magic doing an inspection of all the cells. Sirius collected himself for a moment, and reminded himself why he was really here. Not that he wasn't aware, but more because he had to keep it as together. The thought sickened him, and hardened his chest, but kept him sane nonetheless.

"Fudge," Sirius grumbled hoarsely.

The portly little man with pinstriped suit, scarlet tie, long black traveling coat, pointed purple boots and a lime green bowler hat nodded. "Black."

Planning on looking away, but his eyes caught onto the Daily Prophet in the man's hand. "Do you mind?" Sirius gestured weakly, "I like the crossword."

Fudge considered him for a second before shrugging it over along with a quill. "It's last weeks."

"Doesn't matter." Sirius nodded in thanks.

The minister continued walking, but Sirius's eyes stared at the paper hungrily when he saw a very familiar rat on the front cover. Reading quickly, he gripped the paper tighter than necessary, and whispered to himself, "He's at Hogwarts…"