When Clara stuck her head out of the TARDIS to see a shocked crowd surrounding them and a pair of legs jutting out from under the door, the first thing the Doctor says is "Not again."

Clara squeaked and closed the TARDIS door quickly, pressing her back into it as she glared up at him. "Again? You've landed on someone before?!"

"Yes… once or twice. Or four times… approximately," His eyes went to his feet almost bashfully, rubbing the back of his neck. Clara reached a hand up, smacking his arm and eliciting a whine.

"Four times, Dorothy Gale?"

"You know, it's funny that you say that because Frankie Baum—"

Clara's head was spinning and it was only nine o'clock, a ridiculously early hour for having already killed someone and facing a crowd of astonished onlookers right on the other side of the TARDIS doors, no doubt waiting for a pair of murderers to emerge from the blue box for a prompt and tidy arrest. "You knew Frank L. Baum?"

"Well when I met him, he was just a struggling novelist on Zo. By complete accident, I just happened to land on Queen Jui the Third, universally hated I might add," Clara was staring at him but he continued to prattle on, his hands alternately waving and wrapping around themselves. "Moved to Earth, published his novel, became one of the most beloved storytellers of all time…" He shrugged, his head tilting to the side. "Took a page right out of the Brontё sisters' book, really."

Clara held up a hand and the Doctor stopped, his cheeks puffing out with the force of the story he wanted to tell her about the time he met Emily Brontё on the moors. But she was looking very stern and that meant he should stop talking now.

"I'm going to have to ignore the fact that you just told me that Frank L. Baum as well as all three Brontё sisters are aliens because right outside that door—" Clara gestured and looked to the Doctor to make sure she had his attention. He nodded diligently, his brow furrowed. "There is an entire crowd waiting for an explanation as to why someone just landed a police box on their friend."

The Doctor sighed and dropped his head between his shoulders. "Okay, okay…" His hand came up to his forehead in a salute before he straightened his bowtie. "Back in a mo', Oswald."

The TARDIS doors had closed behind him for a full three seconds before he was whipping back inside, coat tails spinning. Clara stepped back in alarm, hearing jeers from the crowd. "Oh god, what did you do!?"

His hair was flopping in his face and she could still hear some unpleasant yelling from beyond the door. The Doctor pushed his hair back and held up both hands. "Good news, bad news. Good news is we're on Erdem, one of the most brilliant planets in the Lotus Nebula. Lovely waterfalls, known for their centuries-old traditions and incredibly intuitive priestesses. Excellent croquet players, they'll take the gold in the 4089th Olympics—"

"And the bad news?" Someone banged on the TARDIS door and Clara jumped, her ponytail swinging as the Doctor rubbed his hands together.

"The bad news is… we've just killed the high priestess."

Clara was equal parts horrified and confused. "We can just... go? Maybe? Right, just pop off and pretend like this never happened! That'd be a bit cold though, a hit and run really… I'm not sure how I feel about committing vehicular manslaughter with a space ship."

The Doctor was tapping the sonic on and off and the banging on the door was getting more impatient. "No, manslaughter bad… facing an expectant and most likely upset crowd good!" Clara made a face somewhere between a smile and a wince. Good wasn't exactly the word she'd use. He tried to look encouraging and offered his hand. "Might as well get out there."

"Geronimo?"

The Doctor grinned at the word and she took his hand. "Geronimo."

To say that the expressions on the crowd were less than enthused at their emergence was putting it lightly.

The Doctor held up a hand in a slightly awkward greeting. "Hello! I'm the Doctor and this is Clara. We're terribly sorry to have landed on your friend here, but the landing coordinator can be a bit touchy sometimes and as you can see, I can't really tell where I'm going in this thing—"

Clara was ducked behind him a little, not willing to take full responsibility for what had clearly been his fault but when she peeked out, it appeared that the crowd was not listening to the Doctor. Rather, they were looking behind him. At her. She tugged on his sleeve nervously and the Doctor stopped, looking down at her. "Yes, what is it? I'm a bit busy at the moment."

His hand swept out over the crowd and he gave them an apologetic smile but no one was paying him any attention. A woman in the front dressed in some kind of robe took a step forward, gesturing to Clara with wide eyes. That was a bit alarming so Clara took a step back, desperately wanting to get back into the TARDIS where women in robes weren't looking at her funny. "Doctor… they're all looking at me."

For the first time the Doctor seemed to actually look around at the crowd that had gathered and realized that in fact yes, they weren't paying attention. This confused him. "Yes… it would seem that they are."

"Why are they doing that?"

"Erdem is a place of tradition, Clara. They have very strict rules and ceremonies, dating back to when the Lotus Nebula was still in its infancy. Their priestesses are some of the most praised and respected people across the galaxy and—"

"All praise be to the new High Priestess, leader of the liberated world of Erdem and the sexual advancement of the Lotus Nebula!" The woman in the robe was raising her hands and the crowd dropped to its knees. For a second, Clara thought she might've swallowed her own tongue.

"They also happen to be very… sexually enlightened." The Doctor shifted uncomfortably and straightened his bowtie.

Clara looked, wide-eyed, out at the crowd that was now kneeling in front of them and the woman in the robe took her hand. Clara tried to pull away but she had a surprisingly strong grip. "Um... Doctor?"

He was rocking back and forth on his feet, rubbing his forehead as the woman gripping her hand glared at him. Clara looked up at him slowly, raising her eyebrows. "I think she just made you the new high priestess."

"What?" The woman who was tugging on her hand had started to chanting, waving her fingers in front of Clara's face. The Doctor was pacing, his hand covering his face.

"Well, you see we killed the last priestess."

"You killed her! I didn't do anything."

"Yes, well, the Erdemians are a very female-centric society," The Doctor waved his hands in front of his chest and then his groin and Clara groaned. He truly had no idea what he was doing. "They can't make me the new high priestess because I don't have the right… stuff." Clara rolled her eyes and the priestess woman was rubbing her arms, kneeling in front of her.

"It's not like I can be a high priestess—Ow!" The priestess grabbed her face, pinching her cheeks and looking into her eyes as Clara looked back in complete bewilderment. The Doctor leaned in, despite a nasty look from the woman, and lowered his voice.

"We could face the alternative?"

"Which is?"

"Trial by a council of priestesses, one of whom we've just killed, most likely resulting in death."

"High priestess it is," and Clara stuck out her hand, attempting to shake hands with the woman who was rubbing her face and chanting. "I accept."

"There is no need to accept, priestess. Fate has chosen you," The woman surveyed Clara's outstretched hand in wonder and the Doctor gingerly reached out and lowered it. He shook his head as Clara looked up at him and she let her hand drop. Erdem wasn't a hand-shakey place, she guessed. "I am Priestess Nin. May I be acquainted with the new high priestess?"

Clara glanced up at the Doctor and he gave her an encouraging nod and a gesture she guess mean go on. "I'm Clara." Priestess Nin exclaimed loudly and raised her hands.

"High Priestess Clara, we recognize you as the leader of the Erdemian liberated world."

Next to her, the Doctor appeared to be struggling not to laugh. Clara forced a smile, giving the still-kneeling crowd and Priestess Nin a reluctant thumbs up. "Smashing…"

Nin dropped her hands and opened them upwards, looking to the Doctor. "Is this man your lover, high priestess?"

The Doctor pointed a finger to his own chest and looked down at Clara, amused. Clara huffed, embarrassed. "No! No no no…"

"Then he will be executed."

In a split second, two incredibly muscular and scantily-clad men had the Doctor by the forearms, looking about ready to haul him off.

"No, wait!" Priestess Nin looked at Clara expectantly. "He's my… um—" The Doctor was making wild gestures at her but, limited to the use of only his hands, she was struggling to understand what he was trying to say. "He's my… advisor. My companion!" The Doctor groaned, his head dropping back in annoyance.

"HighpPriestess, I'm sorry but our law forbids you any relationship with a man that is not one of complete sexual exploration."

This made the Doctor perk up, looking at Nin with raised eyebrows. "I'm sorry, what?"

"If I say he's my… lover—" Clara made a face at the word. "Will you please not execute him? Thanks."

Nin nodded and the two men dropped their hold on the Doctor. He cleared his throat pointedly, standing up and straightening his bowtie before brushing non-existent dust off his jacket. The priestess eyed him with a look of skepticism before the Doctor clapped a hand onto Clara's shoulder.

"That's me, lover to the high priestess of Erdem." He leaned over a little, chuckling as he beamed before looking up at Clara, who gave him a less amused look. The Doctor cleared his throat again and nodded, putting on his serious face. "Don't execute me, please."

"The ceremony must begin at once!" Nin clapped her hands together twice and more burly men were lifting Clara and the Doctor up on their shoulders, shuttling them through the crowd. Clara reached out for the Doctor's hand, attempting to steady herself at the sudden change of motion and altitude.

"What's happening now!?"

"I think they're taking us to your induction ceremony!" He took her hand, squeezing like he always did to comfort her. And she returned the squeeze, like she always did to let him know she was okay.

"And what does that entail?" Clara looked down as the men held her thighs on their shoulders, jostling up and down slightly with their steps. The Doctor seemed to be enjoying himself, waving at the crowd like he was in a parade.

"Oh you know, the usual," The Doctor gave a flourish with his hand and Clara looked over at him, her lips pursed. He smirked at her before shrugging vaguely. "Well, uh… the tradition of undressing, probably—"

"What?!"

"Maybe the Erdem ritual of the robes… I don't know, really! I've never been to an Erdemian high priestess naming ceremony!" He lifted his arms which made the crowd cheer and the Doctor beamed. "This is exciting!"

The men carried them through the crowd and down an alleyway or two. The TARDIS had landed in what looked to be an outdoor marketplace surrounded by high stone walls. Now the walls curved in over their heads as they were carried through a tunnel until the floor bottomed out, scooping into a wide open ring. Stadium seats, already being filled with people, surrounded the stone floor. It appeared that word travelled fast in Erdem.

Priestess Nin was waiting for them in the center and the Doctor and Clara were set down in front of her. Clara reached for his hand again and he anticipated her, intertwining their fingers knowingly. She looked around, wide eyed. The Doctor's free hand was adjusting his jacket in the presence of the crowd.

"This beats execution, you have to admit."

She glared up at him but he looked a bit pleased with the reaction.

"How am I supposed to be a high priestess on some planet I've never even been to? We can't stay here forever, Doctor."

He waved a hand coolly, lifting his shoulders. "I have tons of titles, most of which I've never fulfilled… That's the thing, no matter where you go in the universe people are always giving away titles. They always want to find a reason that you just whizzed in unexpectedly. Queen Liz the First knighted me on multiple occasions because the TARDIS wouldn't stop landing in medieval England. Granted, there was a pretty significant Chula invasion going on at the time—"

"Doctor."

"Right, sorry," He cleared his throat, Clara's lips pursed as she watched him. The stadium was buzzing with voices and Priestess Nin was otherwise preoccupied over a large trunk someone had carried into the arena. "Not to worry, Oswald. Everything works out in the end."

The Doctor gave her a cheerful and lopsided grin just as Nin turned around, spreading her arms out to the crowd.

"We now begin the rite of naming for the new high priestess of Erdem. Her name is Clara and she will lead us into the new beginning of sexual revolution!" The crowd erupted and Clara leaned over, talking out of the side of her mouth softly.

"You never said what Erdem actually does towards—" She paused, not exactly sure what the correct words were. "—all this revolution business."

The priestess began a chant and the Doctor rocked back and forth on his feet. "Erdem is the leader of the Lotus Nebula in the awakening of the 50th century. They began appointing female priests as leaders of these movements that freed the sexual inhibitions of the Erdemians. They began to celebrate sex rather than follow the Western ideal of condemning it."

Clara eyed Nin as she waved her hands over her, still chanting. "Sounds like my kind of place."

"High Priestess Clara!"

Nin raised her hands again and looked at her expectantly. Clara glanced at the Doctor.

"Uh… present?"

"Do you name this man as your lover? Your partner in complete sexual exploration?" She looked at Clara again, who let out a slow breath, unable to believe she was actually about to say this.

"Um, yep… sure do." The Doctor chuckled under his breath before he jumped as Nin took both of their hands, joining them.

"Do you trust him completely to never distract you from your goals of leadership through the awakening, only that he will never falter in pleasing you?"

This was starting to feel too much like a wedding ceremony for Clara's taste and she looked up at the Doctor with the intention of sharing a mutual eye-roll but found that his eyes were down, on their hands. Nin was holding hers over his and the Doctor's gaze had softened slightly. Clara's heart flipped for reasons she'd rather not acknowledge and when he looked up to see her staring, she quickly averted her gaze. This was all happening rather quickly.

"Yes, I trust him." Clara glanced at him out of the corner of her eye to see him smile slightly. Nin nodded and waved her fingers down the length of Clara's body.

"Then let us begin the traditional Erdemian undressing."

Clara, thinking that the Doctor had be half-joking earlier, looked up at him in alarm. Nin continued.

"You will be taken into your individual rooms to be dressed in the ceremonial garments of the high priestess and her chosen courtesan. When you return, the ritual will begin."

A few women led Clara into a room off of the open arena and she turned to look over her shoulder just as a very talkative Doctor waved to her from where more burly men were ushering him into his own room across the stone expanse. A woman closed the door and immediately began tugging at Clara's leather jacket

Clara attempted, unsuccessfully, to keep it on. "I'm quite sure I can undress myself, thanks!"

The woman had her jacket off and was folding it as the other priestesses, dressed similarly to Nin, swooped in. One of them began unzipping her dress as the one who had taken her jacket spoke. "No, high priestess. It is a tradition on Erdem that the high priestess is undressed by the women who will become her handmaidens."

Clara softened a little, one of them unzipping dress slowly. "How long have you been handmaidens?"

The three of them exchanged a look before one spoke up. "Since I was a child, priestess."

"What's your name?" Clara craned her neck, attempting to make eye contact with the girl. She looked timid, her eyes down.

"Quilla, priestess."

Clara smiled a little and offered her hand out to Quilla. She looked surprised but took it and Clara shook. "It's nice to meet you, Quilla."

If there was one thing she learned from the Doctor it was that no one was insignificant. That was one thing he had given her, the opportunity to meet these people that had never even heard of the planet where she grew up. Sometimes it overwhelmed her, the true immensity of the universe that held them.

After a few embarrassing moments of being left in nothing but her skivvies, the handmaidens had helped her into what they said was the traditional high priestess robe: a large white thing with huge sleeves that reminded Clara of something between a kimono and an elaborate French gown that Marie Antoinette herself would've commissioned. It had a massive bustle and a complicated ribbon-like corset that lifted her breasts towards her chin. When she tried to adjust them, Quilla and the other handmaidens stopped her in alarm, saying it was supposed to do that. The door opened and Clara could see Nin waiting for them in the center of the arena. Opposite her door, the Doctor was also emerging in what appeared to be a gold-plated sarong and shoulder plates. His chest was exposed and Clara was certain she had never seen him in such a state of undress (outside of the TARDIS, that is).

He looked quite uncomfortable, holding his hands over his groin as the men led him to meet Clara in the center once again. Once he saw her, the Doctor seemed to forget himself slightly, his eyes widening at her ornate robe. "Clara…!"

Clara frowned, putting a hand over her exposed cleavage. "What? Stop looking at me like that."

He put his hands out, setting them on her shoulders as he smiled brilliantly. "You look beautiful."

The word rung in her head like a bell and suddenly where his hands where resting on her shoulders felt hot. Her chest rose and fell and she saw his eyes glance down for a moment to watch. "Thank you…"

"High Priestess Clara, are you ready to accept your position as leader of Erdem and interpreter of our revolution?"

Clara glanced up at the Doctor as they both turned to face Nin. He was still beaming. "Yes."

Nin reached out, doing one of her weird motions again before she stopped and Clara could see a cloud fall over her face. "It appears you are still wearing a garment foreign to our planet. Our ritual forbids you to wear anything but your traditional robe."

She felt the heat off her shoulders spread up her neck to her face and the Doctor looked down at her curiously. Biting her lip, Clara bent over, reaching under the heavy skirt of the robe and slid her panties down her legs. She could feel the Doctor's eyes on her as she stepped out of her panties in her bare feet and tossed them aside. Clara straightened up, pushing her hair out of her eyes and cleared her throat. She didn't have to look up at him to know the Doctor was smirking. Nin nodded in approval.

"Thank you, high priestess, but it must be made clear which one of your handmaidens failed in her duties to follow through with our traditions. Name her so she can be properly punished for her disrespect." Nin's eyes gazed behind her to Quilla and Clara whipped around to see the girl's fearful face as she stepped forward.

"It was me, priestess. Please, I do not wish to further shame Erdem. I accept my punishment gladly." Quilla dropped her head and two men stepped forward to grab her

"Wait!" Clara leapt into action, taking Quilla's hand. The Doctor was watching with rapt attention when she looked over at him. Nin looked puzzled.

"High priestess, it is customary for those who have broken high law to be stripped of their title and punished."

"Yes, well…" Clara looked around at the on looking crowd, each one at the edge of their seat. The Doctor was watching her, his expression shifting intricately between what looked like pride then excitement then something she had seen out of the corner of her eye when they were alone in the TARDIS control room and she was bent over examining a particularly odd lever. She lifted her chin, using her most official voice. "As….high priestess of this planet I declare this woman, my friend, free of these charges. She has done nothing wrong in my eyes but make a simple mistake."

Nin looked absolutely shocked but it was clear Clara outranked her in this situation. For a moment Clara thought the Doctor might applaud and he brought his hands up to do so then dropped them quickly after an icy stare from one of the burly men. Nin bowed her head.

"As you wish, high priestess. May we continue?"

Clara nodded and took her place next to the Doctor once again. He took her hand and pat it as he grinned down at her. She smiled up at him, that familiar planet-saving feeling swelling in her chest. Priestess Nin did a few swirling motions with her hands as if tying an invisible string.

"It is time for the divining of the high Ppriestess and her chosen courtesan."

Clara's hand snapped around to face her, her eyebrows raised. The Doctor's hand stopped patting her as they both froze. "Divining…?"

Nin didn't answer, her eyes closed as she continued her motion.

"High Priestess Clara… the tuning spirits of Erdem detect a high aptitude for a knowledgeable partner. The high priestess desires in a partner one who will decline to treat her with false respectful delicacy but rather the rough and passionate desire of a lover who will destroy her."

Clara was almost positive she had turned five shades of deep red. The Doctor's hand felt sweaty in her own but he didn't let go. Slightly flushed at the accuracy of Nin's statements, Clara couldn't look up to see if he was staring at her or not. Nin's hand reached out, gliding over the Doctor's chest and out of the corner of her eye, she could see him watch it in surprise.

"This man, chosen by the High Priestess as her partner in the exploration of the Erdemian enlightenment, holds within him dark desires. He desires the high priestess in ways that have been fulfilled and others that have yet to be realized. He wishes to unlock her and her secret wishes. He holds the key."

Nin let out a gasp and Clara could see the whites of her eyes before her head tilted back. "Take them to their chambers!"

The crowd erupted and Clara jumped, having half-forgotten they were there. They were being lifted again and she almost fell backward with the motion of it. Beside her, the Doctor looked the precise amount of bewildered that she felt.

In a matter of minutes, they were set down in a decorative chamber that seemed to match the intricacies of her robe and the Doctor's gold garment. With a bow the men set them down, opened their palms to Clara and backed out the room, shutting the heavy door behind them with a solid click. Looking around the chamber appeared to be a bedroom, a bed of expensive looking silks and gold as the centerpiece. Clara was so taken aback by the richness of the room, she hadn't noticed the Doctor sniffing and licking a vase of flowers in the entryway. When she turned and saw him nibbling on one of the petals, Clara let out a surprised laugh despite the awkwardness of their situation.

"What are you doing?"

"These flowers, they're not Erdemian. They're—" He pulled a half-eaten petal out of his mouth and examined it. "They're from Splendurosa, only grown on the right side." The Doctor bent down as if attempting to look at the vase from every angle. "They must be growing them here. But Erdem is a almost entirely stone city, how could they—"

"Doctor."

It only took his name to get him to look up, dropping the piece of petal onto the floor and standing up. His hands fell to his sides, no longer attempting to hide the semi-nudity which had previously made him blush in the arena. She watched him take her in, really take her in, and she could tell he had been avoiding it since the second she had emerged from that room.

Clara licked her lips, bravely continuing with what she wanted to say. "What are we doing in here?"

The Doctor's eyes didn't meet hers but rather continued to drink in the sight of her in the robe, the corset pulling in her small waist and lifting her breasts up gently. When he spoke, it seemed to be automatic rather than an intentional and deliberate answer to her question. "After the naming ceremony, the high priestess and her lover are taken to her chambers to consummate—" The word seemed to shake him and brought him back to the present where Clara was standing a few feet away, clutching at the foreign robe that almost drowned her small figure. "But we don't have to do anything—"

What the priestess had said earlier, about what Clara wanted and the Doctor's dark desires… It had been so surreal. "How did she know all that stuff about me before? And about you?"

The Doctor's hands rubbed together in an anxious tick. "Erdem has a complicated web of steam tunnels running under its surface. The priestesses spend hours, days even, sitting over the hot steam baths."

"Like the soothsayers in ancient Rome?"

"Yes exactly. Except on Erdem, the steam is filled with a chemical that makes their brainwaves function on a higher level. If the higher-functioning brainwaves can tap into those around them, they can essentially—"

"Read minds!" The Doctor looked down at her with a grin at the fact that she had finished his sentence and suddenly Clara was very aware of how close they were standing. When neither had been paying attention, they had been steadily moving towards each other until now she was nearly standing on his feet. Clara watched his Adam's apple bob and looked down, the events of the past few hours settling onto her shoulders. "So what they said about you… was it true?"

The Doctor hadn't made any moves to walk away and when Clara looked back up at him he was looking directly at her, into her, with an intensity that furrowed his brow and drew in his features. "It wasn't the ideal way for you to find out…"

"Is that your roundabout way of saying yes?"

His expression didn't change, instead he leaned in even closer and took her cheek in his hand. The gesture was so familiar by now even the inelegance of the day's events didn't stop Clara from leaning in to meet him. "There's something about the universe. It's too wide and expansive and large for us to fall out of the sky randomly. Sure, it does appear random and for all I know it could be, but in the centuries I've been alive, Clara… I've seen that there is always something working beneath the surface." He looked down, taking her hand in his and smoothed his fingers over her palm. "Something always working… and right now, it's working to bring us together."

"I don't understand." Her heart was beating very fast at the tenderness of his gestures and the proximity of his tall and skinny frame bending over her. Clara could feel his breath, hot and ragged against her cheek, and she knew he felt the same.

"I don't either… I don't either…" The Doctor was almost talking to himself, mumbling and tracing the lines in her palm. His other hand moved to cradle the back of her neck and for a moment she closed her eyes, relaxing into him. "Why do we keep being tossed together…?"

Her next words were soft and sudden, surprising herself. "It doesn't matter." She didn't open her eyes as his lips found hers.

It was familiar by now, the stolen kisses in her darkened bedroom doorway or maybe a heated kiss just as the TARDIS door closed behind them and (yet again) they had saved the universe from the brink of destruction. But this was different. He wrapped his arms around her and lifted her up just slightly, pressing her to his chest. Clara's hands instinctively reached for his lapels but landed on his bare chest instead, his gold plating jangling as he tried desperately to pull her closer as if he completely wanted to melt into her.

Nin's words rang in her head of how he could unlock her, how she yearned to find someone who wouldn't treat her like glass. His hands were exploring her back and her waist and suddenly he was pulling away from her swollen lips, having found the ends of the ribbon wrapped around her abdomen. Clara looked down, watching him expertly untie the knots and begin to unravel the fabric that was holding her dress together. Her voice was breathless. "You've done this before."

The ribbon fell apart easily under his fingers and dropped to the floor. The front of the gown opened and she was acutely aware that she wasn't wearing anything underneath. "All I'm wearing is a tin. I'm just evening out the playing field."

Clara's eyebrow arched and his hands were on her waist, lifting her. Automatically she wrapped her legs around his hips, her hands finding his shoulders as his face tilted up to hers. He was taking steady steps towards the massive bed in the center of the room. "How does it feel to be the courtesan to the high priestess of Erdem?"

His knees found the edge of the bed and he knelt, a hand firmly on the small of her back as they started to go down. "You're the most powerful woman in the Lotus Nebula, Clara." Her back hit the mattress and he still held her, crawling over her smaller frame as one of his shoulder plates threatened to slide off. "I'm not sure about the word 'courtesan' though."

Clara shifted, tilting her head up at him curiously. "Well, you're not my lover."

The Doctor smirkd cheekily. "Am I not?"

"No!" Clara made a face and the Doctor chuckled in his way that sounded like he was wheezing for air, his genuine chuckle. Not like the chuckles he made when people threated her or them or their plans to save history. Those were darker. "I've never once referred to anyone as my lover."

"I think a few of the English queens referred to me as one." Clara smacked his arm and gave him a look.

"I'm halfway to undressed under you and you choose now to tell me about bedding previous British monarchs?"

"Right, sorry…" He peeked out from under his flop of a haircut and smiled apologetically. "I do enjoy kissing you, Clara. Does that make me your lover?"

"Well…" He gave her one of his smiles where his forehead wrinkled and his eyes widened, where he really looked at her and she could tell he was happy. "I enjoy kissing you too."

And he kissed her again and she held his face, feeling his grin against her lips for a moment before he sat up, kneeling over her as he struggled to untangle himself from his outfit. "I'm sorry, it's just this metal is incredibly uncomfortable." Clara sat up, helping him out of his shoulder plates and before she could notice he had his gold plated sarong off and he was stark naked. She felt his skin blush under her fingers and glanced down between his legs just as he raised an arm to rub the back of his neck. Clara fell back, making eye contact to see him smirking. "You're an incomparable flirt, Oswald."

"Am not!"

"Oh, shut up."

"Make me."

The statement made the Doctor's blush dissolve and his hand drop, moving to the bed beside her head and she sunk into the covers as she kept her eyes on his. "Is that what you want, high priestess?"

"You couldn't even if you tried."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

Their exchange was like rubbing her sock feet on a dense wool carpet. Static was spreading through her body, making her hair stand on end. Her skin goose pimpled and he let his eyes linger on hers for a moment before he kissed her, metaphorically touching the doorknob. The static broke in a shockwave that made Clara's body arch into his, throwing her arms around his neck. His lips were parting hers, sucking and groaning as their teeth knocked together accidentally. The Doctor was scrambling to tug her gown off her shoulders and soon enough it was just another blanket under them. Her nails raked down his bare chest and squeezing his pectoral, eliciting a familiar grunt against her tongue in his mouth.

"Turn around, Oswald."

Clara's lips followed his desperately as she sat up, licking her lips and rolling over onto her stomach. The Doctor's hands found her hips and tugged, pulling her onto her knees. He leaned over, his voice in her ear.

"You've done this before."

She rocked back, knocking the back of her thighs into his legs and turned, eyeing him. "Are you going to consummate this thing or what?"

And he slid into her, making her back arch and her toes curl, gasping for air. Oh god, yes.

It was rougher than he had ever been with her, his hands indecisively cupping her breasts and then where all her nerves bundled together between her legs. His mouth was on her spine, breathing against the vertebrae as she writhed under him. Clara was panting, her knuckles turning white as she clutched the sheets of the lavish bed and it felt like the Doctor was kissing each notch on her spine, punctuated by a firm push into her. She moaned eagerly and bit down on her lip as her head tilted back.

And then he spanked her.

Clara's front collapsed into the bed and she tugged desperately at the sheets, letting out a sound somewhere between a broken moan and a gasp. The Doctor's hand splayed over her back and he leaned into her deeper, making her see stars behind her eyelids. Clara scrambled for his hand and squeezed. Like he always did, he intertwined their fingers and his thumb rubbed hers soothingly as he spanked her again.

"Doctor… Doctor…" Her voice was muffled in the sheet and she could see his knuckles clenched around her hand. He was panting desperately and she echoed him, shaking with each movement as he surged into her.

"Clara…" Her name tumbled out of his mouth and his other hand involuntarily wrapped around her ponytail. The Doctor was tugging on her hair as her back curled up into him and she fell over the edge, pulling him with her. "Clara!"

Clara felt his chest press against her back and their skin stuck together, a thin layer of sweat beading on them. She was panting, desperately trying to not entirely collapse into the sheets when she heard the familiar grinding of engines. Abruptly, the TARDIS was materializing right beside the bed. The Doctor was on his back, stretching his arms over his head and still panting.

"There she is!"

Clara collapsed, thighs shaking. She felt a little self-conscious at their state and the looming presence of the blue box beside the bed in the middle of the ceremonial room somewhere deep in Erdem. The Doctor was ruffling his hair and chuckling.

"I knew the homing detectors were working, I just needed a chance to prove it!" He sat up and gave her bum a playful slap, reminiscent of the much more rough slaps he had been giving her minutes earlier. She peeked out at him from the rumpled sheets, hiding her smirk and her bare chest. "Let's go have a cuppa."

Clara pushed up onto her elbows with a huff. "What about Erdem! What about high priesthood?"

"Well, we consummated that. That's done. High priestess and—" He waved a hand down his chest and over his exposed groin. Clara giggled and buried her face in the sheets once again. "—courtesan and all that." He leaped to his feet, doing a few stretches that were made slightly obscene due to his state of undress. Clara pretended not to watch. "Off to the next one." And he turned, swinging the TARDIS doors open and sauntering inside. Clara could swear she heard it make a rather pleased sound.

She sat up and moved to follow him before grabbing the robe off the bed, pulling it on loosely. She would be taking that with her. Who knows, they might soon want to revisit their new titles. Clara held the gown around herself and (with a little bit of grumpy resistance) shut the TARDIS doors behind her.