A/N: I'm writing this because I think a female Sena is interesting in the fact that she has so much more depth than male Sena in terms of experiences. Sure, male Sena had problems with being a pushover, but as a female, Sena would have so many more problems, including her self-confidence, and her trauma, and it gives her so much more dynamic than her male counterpart. It'll be fun to see how this will develop… assuming I ever get that far.

Warning: this first chapter isn't how the story will be narrated. This is only to set the character of Sena the way she is supposed to be. Furthermore, this is a fem!Sena with a twist...

Published: 10 Dec 13

Edited:

Contrary to popular thought, Sena thought about girls often.

Sena thought about girls with their nice smells and cute faces; girls that were sweet, good at cooking, and had long hair; girls were pretty when they smiled, and put make up on everyday to impress the boy that they liked, making them look even more pretty than usual—and they had breasts, which allowed them to give warm and gentle hugs.

Sena thought about girls, because Sena wasn't anything like them, despite being a girl herself.

Despite being fourteen years old, Sena hadn't developed in the slightest. She was short, flat, and weak. She had scruffy hair that defied gravity, and when she smiled, she looked like a dork. She wasn't all that good at cooking, and she was too awkward to talk to people normally. She stuttered. She wasn't pretty in the slightest.

And that was why people had picked on her, because she was too ugly to be a girl, and too feminine to be a boy. She was an it, and she was idiot-Sena with the idiot brain. She was a gopher for everyone, rushing back and forth the school to fulfill some request that wasn't all that important, the sole purpose of which was to see her rush around in complete panic.

Sena tried to hard to change that, learning under Mamori to try and change herself, to become more confident, to be prettier, and to be more girly, but it didn't work. She was picked on even harder for putting her hair into pigtails, with boys tugging on them hard, and girls grabbing them, snipping at her hair with their flashing scissors and cruel words.

She had learnt that clinging onto Mamori had only caused them to retaliate harder: they started putting tacks into her shoes, she found her clothing hidden away inside of a toilet bowl when she went swimming, she tripped over feet often, and both boys and girls shoved her into a wall when teachers weren't looking.

Because it was all a game to them, and it didn't matter that Sena had feelings, or that Sena's heart was golden. It didn't matter that all she wanted was to make friends, and that with every little thing that they hurled at her, her resolve would waver, and she hid herself even deeper under that little thing called shame. Her bright smile disappeared under an expression of perpetual fear, and she shrank in on herself.

She lost weight, she had an unhealthy pallor, and her eyes were circled with dark rings because of her nightmares.

Her body was getting weaker with each day, and one day, she woke up in a hospital after having slipped into a coma while sleeping when she was eleven years old. She hadn't woken up for one year and three months and sixteen days, being fed through a tube, her breathing forcibly induced by a respirator for the first month.

Her body had been too weak to breathe by itself, so the machine had done it for her, the doctor told her. Her body was weak now as well, but she was going to get better soon as long as she did what the doctor told her to. Because she didn't want to be weak anymore, she nodded and did what he said, putting all her heart and soul into it, walking up and down the little walkway with her stick-thin arms clinging to the bars on her sides. Her small body was propped up by her father's large hands which dwarfed her scrawny body, and she never saw the pain in her father's eyes as she resolutely took one step after the other, her weight barely negligible to the man.

The one year and three months and sixteen days of being in a coma had affected her body drastically. Her muscles had atrophied, and her gender-specific features hadn't been able to develop properly from the lack of exercise and proper nutrition. The foods that they gave her were enough to sustain her life, but they hadn't been able to stimulate her brain to produce the necessary hormones for her growth. She was put through a regime of drugs that she had to take every day, morning and night, in order to stimulate the production of her hormones... But the price for these pills was too high, and after a month, they had to stop because her father wasn't able to pay for all the bills, when she had physical and speech therapy and tutoring as well.

Sena returned to school after four months of waking up, having recovered enough muscle mass to walk to school and back without collapsing. Two months later, she had recovered enough to run, and Sena found a release in jogging around the block under the watchful eye of Mamori and her mother.

One round turned into two, which turned into four, and soon Sena found herself jogging for hours upon end, sprinting along roads with Mamori at her side on her bike. Mamori had told her to try out for a club, but Sena told her it was all too late, and that she was going to have her end-of-year exams soon. She was going to be a high school student soon!

Mamori nodded, and after that, they were studying together. Page after page after page of formulas and English and Japanese and boring schoolwork, she found herself sitting in an entrance exam for Deimon High School in February in order to be with her Mamori-nee-chan.

And then it was the Spring Holidays.

And at fourteen, Sena was standing in front of a board, clutching Mamori's hand as they searched for her number.

021…

Searching all over the board for the number 021, Mamori found it quickly, and she yelled with happiness, making Sena want to yell in happiness too, but her throat was still weak because she didn't talk all that much. She didn't need to talk, since she only had her nee-chan, her mother, her father and Pitt to talk to. She didn't need anyone else.

However, Mamori went silent, and Sena looked up to see Mamori holding back tears. Sena put on a smile to show that she was going to be strong for her nee-chan because her nee-chan needed her one moment of weakness. No one could be strong forever, and Sena knew that all too well. Mamori smiled back at her a moment later, and she excused herself to go to the washroom to clean up, and Sena nodded, waving her off to freshen up.

Sena was left alone in the courtyard, surrounded by strangers and yelling.

And she suddenly found herself being grabbed by two strange boys, who told her to use their cellphone to talk to her parents, but she stared at them with wide eyes, too terrified to speak to them in case they turned out to be bullies too, and the big, big, big boy had given her a smile that looked like a glare. She had flashbacks to the time when the boys in middle school had cornered her, beating her up until she was on the floor in a heap of bruises and cuts and tears.

Sena sprinted away, crying. She didn't see Mamori come back, to yell at the two for talking to her, making her way home from school, her tiny body weaving its way through the crowds with unerring accuracy.

Mamori came to her home the moment she left from Deimon to hug her, telling her that she was going to protect Sena from Hiruma Youichi and Kurita Ryoukan because they were both evil and would want to hurt her.

The next day, when Sena got dressed to go to school, Mamori came to pick her up, taking her to school with their hands held to make sure that Sena wouldn't get lost. Before they parted ways, she told Sena to make sure not to go anywhere near Hiruma Youichi, and Sena nodded tearfully, shrinking in on herself when Mamori was gone. Clutching her bag to her chest, she went to her homeroom.

However, she was quickly cornered by three much-bigger boys, who demanded her money and to buy them bread from the store. Terrified by the suddenness of the presence of bullies, she did what they told her to do, only to return empty-handed and shame-faced. Sena wanted to be stronger, but she bent to their will because they were bigger than her. She wanted to cry, but she held back her tears, flinching when they yelled at her for not getting their bread. They didn't raise their hand against her, though they dragged her to an empty storage room, intent on locking her in there, only to be distracted by American football gear, and Sena tried to escape from their grasps…

Only to be boxed in when the big, big, big boy appeared, blocking her in the room, and she blacked out, her panic and sudden bout of claustrophobia causing her small heart to beat a little too fast.

Sena didn't know how, but when she woke up, she was somehow recruited into the American football team, unable to disobey the sharp glare of Hiruma Youichi and Kurita Ryoukan, who seemed too nice to be evil, but Mamori had told her that demons had two faces that they showed to people. Too meek to speak out, she did what Hiruma Youichi told her to do, running when he told her to, and to put on the uniform whenever she was going to play a match because if she didn't, he was going to shoot her and no one would be able to find her body.

She didn't want her body to disappear, because she knew that Mamori would be sad to be unable to bury her body when she was dead.

A/N: I made myself sad with this beginning chapter. But starting from Chapter Two, the story narrative will change from the descriptive to the usual format. It will pick up from the recruitment of the 11!