A/N: Ok, so this kind of came to me after watching August 29 episode and I just had to write it. Mind you, I wrote it before I ever saw the August 31 scenes. I absolutely loved the way that particular conversation actually went on the show, but here's another way it could have gone. This is my first Minx effort, so I hope you find it believable and enjoy reading the story!
Of Sex Tapes and Stupid Ex-Husbands
Marissa isn't sure exactly how she feels – enraged, angry, betrayed, violated, crushed, heartbroken… She doesn't know whether to scream or cry… So she runs, because she isn't sure what her reaction is going to be – trying to kill JR on the spot or bursting into tears in front of him. But either way she is not going to give him the satisfaction. He is not going to know how much he's hurt her, he is never going to find out how much she wanted to grab that stupid laptop and crush it on his skull. No, the next time JR is going to see her, she is going to be ready to fight.
In the meantime, though, she runs. She runs as fast as she can, as far away from her bastard ex-husband as she can. Far away from the venom he is spreading, far away from the image of the smirk on his face when he was watching her and Bianca. The idea of him spying on such an intimate moment in her life makes her sick. She revolts at the idea of someone being a witness to what was supposed to be a beautiful moment she shared with her new found love.
She feels tears welling up in her eyes, but she makes a promise to herself that she is not going to cry. He is not going to make her cry, not again. And he is going to pay. She doesn't know how or when, but she is going to make him pay for trying to destroy the memory of one of the most amazing nights of her life. He is going to pay for trying to make it dirty. He is going to pay for breaking her heart once again.
Marissa's first instinct is to call Bianca, because she knows that just hearing Bianca's voice will be able to soothe her a little. It always does. But she decides against it, because she doesn't want to talk to Bianca when she is this broken, even though Bianca is the only person who would be able to help her feel better. But she wants to spare Bianca the pain, so she decides to wait a little, until the initial shock wears off and her hands stop shaking. Until her eyes are no longer wet and the urge to kill JR is a little smaller. Until she can be a little stronger for Bianca once she tells her about JR's newest stunt.
Marissa feels a gush of wind against her face and she hopes it is able to dry her tears. She needs to get rid of those tears before anybody sees her and especially before Bianca sees her.
It takes her another half an hour before she is able to compose herself and calm her heart down a little bit. She knows she won't be able to remain completely calm, how could she with what has just happened, but she feels ready to finally talk to Bianca and tell her what's going on. God knows she couldn't stand if Bianca found out about the tape from any other source.
When she arrives at Bianca's door, she takes a minute to make sure she is ready for this. She has no idea how she's going to tell Bianca about this, how she's going to tell her what JR has done, but she knows she has to. She has to be the one to tell her. So she takes a deep breath and knocks.
It takes Bianca a moment before she answers the door and when she does she notices right away that something is wrong. The way Marissa looks at her almost breaks her heart.
"Marissa, what's wrong?" She asks letting Marissa in and closing the door behind her. Marissa is silent for a moment, just looking at Bianca and wondering how she is going to break the news to hear. "Marissa?" Bianca repeats and looks at her girlfriend intently. There is something in Marissa's eyes that almost scares the brunette.
"Bianca, there is something that I need to tell you…." Marissa begins, still trying to find the words to tell Bianca about the tape. She knows Bianca won't rush her, but she also knows she has to get it out as soon as she can.
"Is everything OK? Is it AJ?" Bianca asks trying to figure out what could have gotten Marissa so upset. Because even though Marissa is trying to hide it, and doing a pretty damn good job too, Bianca can see right through her.
"No, AJ's fine." Marissa explains and Bianca sighs a sigh of relief. Marissa looks around the room nervously and finally decides to sit down. Bianca follows her and looks at her letting Marissa know that she's now ready to listen. "It's about me and you… And JR…." Marissa begins, still struggling to find the words. "He has a video of us…" She takes a deep breath and looks intently at Bianca. "He has a video of us making love the other night in my room and he's blackmailing me with it." She blurts out and holds her breath waiting for a reaction.
Bianca's expression is that of disbelief at first, like she's not sure if she heard Marissa right. Marissa couldn't have possibly said that JR has a sex tape of the two of them, could she? But when she looks at Marissa's face, she realizes that she indeed has heard it right.
"But why… how… I mean how did he…" Bianca keeps trying to ask the question and her head is about to explode with how much she wants to strangle JR, regardless of how he actually got the recording.
"I don't know." Marissa replies trying to remain calm. "I don't know how he did it, most likely planted a camera in my room or something, but he does have a video of us from that night and now he's threatening to show it to everyone if I don't let him see AJ."
Bianca is trying to process what Marissa is saying, but she feels like she may not have mental capacity to understand how can anyone do something like that. And before she even has the time to think about how she feels, she knows she has to kick somebody's butt. So she stands up, grabs her purse and heads for the door.
"I'm gonna kill him!" She announces as she goes for the doorknob, but suddenly she feels Marissa's warm hand on hers and she stops.
"Please don't." Marissa begs. "He's not worth it."
"But that son of a bitch can't get away with it!" Bianca insists. "I made a promise to him that if he ever hurts you again, I'm gonna kick his ass, and that's exactly what I'm gonna do!" She promises, her anger getting the better of her. "Someone's gotta show that jerk…"
"And someone will." Marissa interjects. "But I don't want you to go there now. Trust me, I thought about whacking him on the head with his laptop when he showed me the video, but what good would it have done really? He would have enjoyed it too much and I can't stand the thought of it giving him any more perverse pleasure than it already has." Marissa explains and looks at Bianca pleadingly, "Please just leave it for now."
Bianca's fists are still ready to punch someone, and she feels like she is ready to finish JR off for good, but she decides to listen to Marissa.
"OK." She simply says and the look she gives her girlfriend clearly states that if given the chance, she is going to physically hurt JR and there is nothing anybody can do about it. It surprises Marissa how scary Bianca Montgomery can really be. "But I swear to God…"
"I know." Marissa sighs and touches Bianca's hand gently. "Thank you." She adds and for a moment gets lost in her thoughts, which doesn't get unnoticed by Bianca.
"What is it?"
"Apart from my ex-husband blackmailing us with a sex tape?" Marissa asks forcing a laugh.
"Yeah." Bianca sighs and looks at Marissa intently. "Why are you looking at me like that?" Bianca asks feeling Marissa's burning eyes on her and not quite sure what to think.
"I'm just trying to figure out how is it that you can be so completely selfless?" Marissa looks at Bianca with absolute and utter amazement. "How do you always think about other people before you think about yourself?"
"I don't…" Bianca tries to protest, but Marissa doesn't let her say anything.
"Yes you do. You always worry about everybody else before you worry about yourself. You refused to play the biological parent card with Reese, because you didn't want JR to use the same argument with me. And then you kept helping him win me back, even though let's face it, you hate the guy, because you thought he made me happy. And now you're talking about beating JR up for hurting me, and he's not just hurting me... He's hurting us. He's doing this to you just as much as he's doing it to me. And I hate him for dragging you into all this, for dragging him into his sick games." She takes Bianca's hands in hers and looks at her teary-eyed. "The last thing I want is for JR to hurt you."
"I know. But don't worry, I'll be fine." Bianca smiles gently and pulls Marissa in for a hug. It feels amazing to have Marissa's body pressed to hers, even if just for a moment, and even if under such circumstances. She wraps her arms around Marissa and for a while they just stay like this, in the comfort of each other's arms. The only place they both feel truly safe.
"I was such an idiot." Marissa finally pronounces as she slips away from Bianca's embrace as the brunette shivers at the loss of contact. "I thought he changed. I wanted to believe so badly that he was turning his life around for his son." Marissa throws her hands up in the air. "So, so stupid!" She almost screams, as if trying to reproach herself for falling for JR's tricks once again. "But you knew." Marissa looks at Bianca meaningfully. "You knew what a son of a bitch he is and you knew he was not done playing dirty. I should have listened to you." She sighs with resignation.
"Trust me, Marissa, 'I told you so' is the last thing I wanna say to you right now. " Bianca smiles weekly. "I'd much rather be wrong about him."
"I know." Marissa smiles back at her. And she indeed does. She knows that Bianca couldn't give a rat's ass about being right, it's just simply not the person she is. Marissa knows Bianca would do absolutely anything to make her happy and to make sure nobody hurts her, and sometimes she can't believe she found someone who feels this way about her. Someone who not that long ago was ready to sacrifice her own happiness to make sure Marissa was happy. "I'm so sorry about all this." Marissa says again trying to make sure Bianca knows how much she hates JR for doing this.
"Don't you dare." Bianca protests. "Don't you dare think any of this is your fault. Unless you are the one who made the tape." Bianca looks at her questioningly and Marissa can't help but laugh.
"He's my ex-husband." Marissa points out, but she can't stop looking at Bianca with amazement. She knows Bianca is trying to stay strong for her, but she's done leaning on Bianca all the time. She needs Bianca to know that it's OK to not be the strongest person in the world all the time. Because there is no way Bianca is not boiling inside knowing about the video and Marissa feels like she needs Bianca to know that they will get through it. She needs Bianca to know and understand that she's gonna be there for her no matter what. So she gently strokes Bianca's hand and looks deeply into her eyes, once again repeating what she has said before, "I'm sorry." And she doesn't need to say anything else, because Bianca just knows, she can read her like a book.
"This is not your fault. You are not the one who recorded two people making love, unbeknownst to them, and is now threatening to use this video to hurt them? You are not the one spying on people's most intimate and private moments and plotting how you can use that to your advantage. You are not the one invading people's privacy, recording things that should always remain between two people. Two people who are in love, and not the whole damn world." Bianca finally stops and Marissa realizes that it's in that particular moment that Bianca starts to grasp what JR really has done. And she can see the anger in Bianca's eyes and she hates JR more than she ever thought possible. And it's not even about the damn tape anymore, it's about making Bianca feel what Marissa knows she's feeling right now. She knows, because she's feeling the same thing.
For a moment they just gaze at each other, trying to comprehend what is happening and trying to figure out how to tackle the situation. How to face JR without losing what they have in the process.
"We're gonna be OK, right?" Marissa quietly asks after a moment, this time desperately needing reassurance from her girlfriend. "We're gonna fight this, right?"
"Oh yeah." Bianca promises her as she gently runs her hand through Marissa's hair. "We are soo gonna fight this." She smiles and plants a small kiss Marissa's lips. "JR is gonna know that it takes a lot more than a sex tape to destroy us. And he's gonna be sorry for ever thinking that he could touch us. I will be damned if I let him hurt you or AJ like this, or Miranda and Gabby." Bianca says with firmly and as Marissa looks into her eyes, she knows that everything is going to be OK. When she looks at Bianca, she sees something that she knows has always been there, but sometimes she forgets about it – Bianca's conviction that they can do anything together. That anything is possible. And it is. And Marissa decides that she's not gonna let JR convince her otherwise. "We're gonna figure this out." Bianca promises as she gently squeezes her girlfriend's hands. And Marissa's legs almost give way when she notices the way Bianca is looking at her. Nobody has ever looked at her like that before. Nobody has ever made her feel like she could take on the whole damn world if she wanted to.
"Have I told you lately how amazing you are?" Marissa brings Bianca's hands to her lips and kisses them.
"You might have mentioned it." Bianca grins, "But feel free to repeat it anytime you want."
"Well you are amazing." Marissa states. "Really. And I am so lucky to have found you."
"No, we are lucky to have found each other." Bianca corrects her with a smile. "And I sure as hell won't let some jackass with too much gel in his hair destroy what we have. I promise you I will do anything in my power to make sure JR is sorry he ever thought he could mess with us."
Marissa's heart skips a beat at this declaration and she starts to realize that it doesn't really matter what JR does and how much he tries to hurt her, because she is still gonna come out a winner in all of this. Because she's got Bianca and AJ and Miranda and Gabby and nothing can take them away from her. And whatever crap JR decides to throw at them, they are gonna fight him together, as a couple and as a family. And they are not gonna let him win, this much she knows. As long as Bianca keeps looking at her the way she does now, Marissa knows she can do anything. And she can't wait to take on the world with Bianca by her side.