Disclaimer: All characters and things associated with The Twilight Saga belong to Stephanie Meyers. This writing is for pure entertainment only.

Summary: Set during New Moon. After Edward leaves, Bella is miserable and Jacob is there for her until things go too far between them, leaving Bella in an unexpected condition. When Edward returns how will Bella explain her situation to him? B/E B/J pairings

Chapter 1

"I hate this." Bella moved forward, grabbing Jacob's short hair in her fist as he sat on her bed. She thought she had lost him a few days earlier, just as she had lost Edward months before. She thought both of them had abandoned her, but Jacob had come back and Edward had not. In the back of her mind, Bella knew Edward would never return.

"I hate what they have done to you." Bella continued to tell Jacob. She just wanted her old friend back, she wanted desperately to hold onto some piece of hope, and that's what Jacob was to her.

Jacob, instead of responding, grabbed Bella's wrist, inspecting the scare from Edward's bite that had saved Bella almost half a year ago. He frowned and looked up at her.

That was when Jacob explained what had happened to him, all he had to do was remind Bella of the story he had told her months back of his people and "the cold ones". She knew, she understood, she had seen it in the wolf's eyes earlier that day in the woods.

"I should go." Jacob said after a moment of silence. "I don't want anyone to start looking for me."

"Don't go." Bella found herself saying all too quickly. She didn't want Jacob to leave. In some sick twisted way, knowing he was a werewolf now, made her feel so close to him because he was different, just like Edward had been. In a way, Jacob reminded Bella of Edward.

"Bella…" Jacob started, but was cut off as Bella threw her arms around his neck.

"Please, don't go." Bella hugged him, feeling the heat radiate from Jacob's muscular body. Eventually she pulled back. "Please…"

Jacob took a sharp breath, his eyes drifting to the dream catcher he had given Bella for her birthday that was attached to the headboard of her bed. "I…"

Before Jacob could finish his thought, or Bella had full consciousness of what she was doing, she found herself pulling Jacob's lips close to hers, kissing him fiercely. Jacob didn't object to the kiss, and Bella was glad. That kiss made her feel alive again.

After a moment, their lips parted.

"What…" Jacob seemed confused.

"Just…don't leave." Bella pulled Jacob in for another kiss and he leaned into her, easing her onto her bed.

Jacob kissed Bella's neck, and it reminded her of Edward, and then he kissed her forehead, and it reminded her of Edward. She closed her eyes, imagining her pale-faced and flawless vampire. Jacob then kissed her lips, and the warmth of his breath caused Bella to open her eyes, realizing Edward was nowhere to be found, it was just her and Jacob.

Bella realized in that moment, that maybe this was how it was supposed to be. Maybe knowing Edward, what he was and what world he lived in, would make it easier for her to understand Jacob now. She pulled away from another one of Jacob's kisses.

"Don't leave me." Bella breathed into Jacob's ear.

Jacob smiled at her. "Never." He moved to kiss her again, but Bella tilted her head, and he kissed her neck, immediately Jacob took it as a sign he had gone too far. He staggered back. "I…I'm sorry…Bella…"

"No." Bella realized what Jacob was thinking. "Don't be." She stood, realizing that maybe Jacob was her answer; he certainly stopped the pain that entered her mind and heart every time she thought of Edward. Even if he wasn't the answer, she wanted some sort of connection, some sort of link to Edward's world of the supernatural and to her Jacob was that link. She slowly lifted her shirt over her head.

Jacob stood there, visibly shocked. After a moment, realizing Bella was now standing in front of him in nothing more than her bra and underwear, he found the strength to speak. "What…Bella…what are you doing?"

"Don't…" Bella started, her thoughts moving far too fast in her head for her to fully understand. What am I doing? She asked herself. She glanced over at Jacob, his half clothed body looking so muscular and full of life. Life. I want mine back. She knew what she was doing. Her life had left with Edward, and now she needed some part of it back. "I want….I want this, Jake…"

Jacob swallowed hard; this was not how he had pictured his first time, especially not after telling the girl moments early he was a monster. "Are…are you...sure?"

Bella nodded all too quickly, and before she could think another thought of Edward she jumped into Jacob's muscular arms, and he pulled her down onto her bed, placing her down gently, and kissing her neck softly before removing his own pants and climbing in with her.

The next morning, Bella slowly woke up. Still half asleep, she felt another body in bed next to her and rolled toward it. Her half conscious mind told her it was Edward, her Edward, he was back. She smiled at the thought until her face connected with the bear, muscular chest laying next to her. The body was warm. She opened her eyes, looking at the skin; the skin was tan. Quickly, Bella sat up to see Jacob Black asleep next to her. She was in shock, and then all the images from the previous night rushed into her head. She could see Jacob kissing her, and holding her, and undressing in front of her. She felt his body as he showed his love for her, and she could feel the safety she had felt laying in his arms afterwards.

Bella was horrified with herself. She couldn't believe what she had done. She had always dreamed that Edward would be the only one she ever physically loved, and yet, as she sat in her bed, taking in the fact that both she and Jacob were naked, she realized her dream was over. Edward would not be her first; Edward would never return.

Still, the notion of moving on to Jacob so quickly made Bella feel selfish; she had wanted to hold onto her image of Edward being the only one she could ever love a little longer. Love. Did she even love Jacob? Bella was unsure. She had feelings for him, but they weren't the same as the ones she had for Edward.

She sighed, studying the sleeping werewolf in her bed. Jacob was very striking, built so sturdy and he had a great smile. Bella knew all of this, and could not fight her physical attraction to Jacob. Still, the emotional connection to Jacob was nowhere near what it had been to Edward. She and Jacob were great friends, she knew him, but he didn't make her feel the way Edward had made her feel. Jacob didn't drive all of her senses wild.

"Maybe that's not what love is…" Bella whispered to herself.

Her whisper, however, was enough to wake Jacob from his sleep. He slowly rubbed his eyes, letting out a loud yawn before opening his eyes. Immediately he saw Bella sitting up next to him, holding the sheets to her breast and he jumped back, bashing his head against the head board of Bella's bed.

"Be careful." Bella reached out instinctively for Jacob as he rubbed the back of his head.

"Bella…what…" Jacob looked around frantically, trying to make sense of why he was in bed, naked, with Bella Swan. Not that he was complaining, just confused.

"Jacob…we…uh…" Bella's words fell flat.

Jacob's eyes suddenly grew wide, and Bella realized she did not have to tell the werewolf what had happened the night before. He remembered.

"Wow…" Jacob laughed nervously. "This is…uh…weird…" He laughed again.

"Yeah." Bella nodded in agreement, her eyes not meeting his.

After a beat, Jacob rubbed his forehead. "Well…I…uh…I guess I should go." He smiled at her.

She loved his smile. Bella had always loved Jacob's big smile. "Okay…sure."

Jacob took another deep breath and then motioned to his boxers, which were next to Bella on the bed. "Could you hand me those?"

"Sure….right…" Bella snapped out of her trance-like state, grabbing the boxers and handing them to Jacob.

Bella watched Jacob slip his boxers on and then climb out of bed, every one of his muscles bulging as he moved to pick his pants off the floor. She realized he moved with grace, similar to Edwards. Its because he is a werewolf, she thought to herself. Her feelings for Jacob were still very new and overwhelming for her to take in. She was attracted to him, she thought she might have even loved him, but how would she know? How could she love anyone after Edward had left her behind. He had loved her and she had loved him, but that had not been enough to keep him in Forks.

"Okay, Bells…so…" Jacob broke Bella's thoughts. "Are we going to act like this never happened?" He motioned at the bed. "Or…"

"Why would we ignore it?" Bella found herself saying before she really even registered his question.

"I am not sure…" Jacob looked down at his hands. "Because it's not what you wanted…"

Bella could see, in that instant, that Jacob really did care for her, and she knew parts of her cared for him. The rest of her, she decided, would have to learn to care for him, she decided. After all, Edward was never coming back, and she needed to move on. "Jake…I just want someone who won't leave." She said finally.

Jacob smiled back at her, relief seeming to fly across his tense muscles. He leaned down on the bed, close to her. "I will never leave."

Bella gave a tight lipped smile. She had heard that one before; Edward had told her the same thing and yet he had left. As Jacob inched closer to her, she realized all that was separating him from her naked body was the sheet she was still clutching in her hand. She hesitated and backed away from him slightly; she suddenly got the sense that what had happened between them was wrong and that trying to convince herself any different was only so she would not feel the pain of Edward leaving her. She loved Jacob, yes, but as a friend, she realized.

"What's wrong?" Jacob asked, immediately.

"I'm sorry, Jake." Bella looked away from him. "I…I can't."

"You can't…." Jacob seemed confused.

Bella looked back at him. "You're my best friend, Jake. I don't want to lose that."

"And you won't." Jacob was standing straight up now, realizing what Bella meant, and yet not wanting to accept it. "Bella, I know you think we are only friends but…"

"We are only friends." Bella said quickly.

"Friends don't kiss each other like you kissed me last night!" Jacob's voice rose as his temper did.

"Please Jacob…" Bella started.

"No, Bella!" Jacob seemed to growl. "You felt something last night…you had to have…otherwise what happened wouldn't have!"

Bella was thankful that Charlie had left for work already, seeing as how Jacob's voice was growing louder every minute. "Jake, I don't know what happened last night. I don't know why I did any of that…"

"Because you have feelings for me." Jacob told her.

"Yes…" Bella admitted. She felt for Jacob, but she loved Edward in a way she could never love Jacob. She knew she would only hurt Jacob in the end.

"So then why does it have to be more complicated than that?" Jacob seemed to calm down a little now.

"Because it is." Bella told him.

"Because of him because of the blood sucker…" Jacob was angry again.

Bella hated when Jacob referred to Edward as that. She was angry now. "Yes, because of Edward."

"Well just remember, Bella, that he left you." Jacob told her, and then added. "But I won't. I'll wait for you." And with that Jacob was out the window.

The second Bella was alone, she began crying uncontrollably. What had she done?