Suspicions
Remus surveyed the elegant room with pleasure. There were many things he'd been looking forward to experiencing now that he was back at Hogwarts. Clean sheets on a comfortable bed, three delicious meals a day and as much food to eat as he wanted any time, a steady income, the challenge of passing on his knowledge to impressionable minds, and taking a long hot bath in one of the school's enormous tubs.
With a smile on his face, he removed his robe, laid it over a nearby bench and knelt beside the built-in bathtub, reaching down to adjust the faucets exactly the way he desired. Visiting one of the private staff baths had been on his list of things to do ever since he'd arrived back at the school, but one thing or another always seemed to get in the way. So he'd kept to the small bath attached to his room until now, but tonight he finally had some extra free time and he intended to make the most of it. With no classes tomorrow, no papers to grade, and no meetings to prepare for, at last, he had plenty of time for a good long soak.
As the taps cut off, Remus waded into the warm, fragrant water, sighed in deep satisfaction, and dove in. Surfacing with a shake of his head, he swam a leisurely length across the pool before resting his arms against one marble edge and letting his body float freely in front of him. It felt wonderful, almost decadent; he gave a low moan of pleasure as all of his muscles truly relaxed for the first time in ages.
Smiling happily, he glanced around the large room. This bath was even more ornate than the prefect's bath he remembered so fondly from his school days. There were mountains of huge fluffy towels, stacks of thick, fragrant bars of soap, an assortment of padded benches, a few comfortable looking chaise longues, and to one side of the room stood a large full length mirror in an ornate gilt frame.
As Remus idly glanced into the mirror the glass shimmered bluely, and he felt his body tense once more. How odd…
Casually he let his glance drift away again as he released the side of the pool and dove back into the warm, relaxing water. He swam a couple of laps around the pool. Then he climbed the steps, letting the water sheet off his body as he picked up a fluffy towel that lay close to hand. He wiped his face and hair with it briefly before wrapping it securely around his waist.
Slowly, he crossed to where he'd left his robe, bent and pulled his wand from the pocket, then, before anyone could possibly guess his intention, he whirled around, pointed the wand at the mirror and mentally cast the incantation that would reverse the suspected spell.
There was a bright flash, and quite suddenly he was looking through the mirror into another room entirely. A quick blur of movement revealed a glimpse of a watcher who threw himself out of sight in an instant. Remus stared hard. Did he imagine it? Or was that really Severus Snape who'd been watching him? For a brief moment, Remus simply stared at an almost blank wall in a now empty room. Then with a brilliant flash of blue light, the spell was broken, and he found himself staring at his own shocked face reflected in the glass.
Remus sat down heavily on one of the benches. Could it really have been Severus watching him? The idea confused, appalled, and if he was honest, excited him. Severus had been nothing but scornful and sneering since Remus had arrived to teach, which is what he'd come to expect from the man, though it hadn't always been that way between them.
There'd been a time, back when they were in school, when they'd almost been friends. There'd even been a hint that they might have become more, if fate had been kinder.
Remus closed his eyes and a memory, buried deep, sprang vividly to life. He'd been studying in the library very late one evening, not an unusual occurrence in itself, but this night stood out among all the others. After pulling some needed books from the shelves, he'd walked around the back of a bookcase and straight into Severus. Thrown off balance by the unexpected collision, his books clattered to the floor and he would have joined them if Severus hadn't reached out and grabbed him by the shoulders, holding him in place.
They'd stood there, face to face, chest to chest, for what seemed an eternity. Severus's penetrating dark eyes captured his gaze, and he simply hadn't been able to look away. Without a word being exchanged they communicated nevertheless. Severus had tilted his head and slowly begun to bend closer. As the other boy moved too close to focus on, Remus had closed his eyes and held his breath…waiting.
His heart had been beating so hard that he was afraid it would explode when he'd felt the Slytherin's lips brush against his own. A light touch, furtive and uncertain at first until he'd begun to respond, then he felt his own sudden desire mirrored in a deepening of the kiss. He remembered feeling as if he was flying, his emotions soaring away with the unexpected wonder of the moment.
Then James's voice, calling to him from an aisle away, had brought him abruptly back to earth. When he opened his eyes again, he'd been alone and suddenly, achingly lonely.
There was a part of him that sometimes wondered if he'd dreamed that touch, that one blissful moment of contact, yet the memory of it had stayed with him, bright and clear, ever since.
It hadn't been long afterward that Sirius's appalling behavior had ended even the faintest hope of a friendship with Severus with brutal finality. In all the years since, they'd barely spoken a civil word to one another. Anger, bitterness, and fear had created a chasm that just seemed too wide to span.
Yet once there had been more. Once they'd had the possibility of friendship and an attraction they'd never had the chance to explore. That attraction hadn't faded for him. Maybe it hadn't completely faded for Severus either.
Spying on him because he didn't trust him was what he expected of Severus under the circumstances, but in the bath? Spying in such an intimate setting generally meant more than simple suspicion. If it was Severus who'd been looking through that enchanted mirror, and he had little doubt that it was; how could he get him to admit it?
Remus sighed and opened his eyes. He'd probably have better luck trying to catch fog with his bare hands.
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
In the staff room the next afternoon, Remus set his tea cup aside and cleared his throat loudly to gain everyone's attention. Pomona and Minerva, who'd been chatting together, turned towards him with expectant expressions on their faces. Filius lowered the newspaper he'd been hiding behind, and Irma Pince looked up from her book, adjusting her spectacles with a look of annoyance on her face at being interrupted. Severus, on the other hand, who stood by the fire, pointedly turned away from the rest, but there was something quietly watchful about his stance.
"Something odd happened to me last night, and I feel I should mention it," Remus began.
"Oh?" asked Minerva, her voice filled with curiosity.
"Yes, as I was using the staff bathroom on the second floor, I had the most peculiar feeling that I was being watched."
"Watched!" exclaimed Pomona indignantly. "Surely not."
"Well, I'd have thought it was rather unlikely myself, but as I was trying to explain the feeling, I noticed that the standing mirror near the bath was showing the telltale blue sheen of a scrying spell."
"Mirror? What mirror?" asked Minerva in confusion.
"The tall standing mirror next to the bath."
"Remus, the only mirror in that bathroom is the small oval one in the far back corner near where the extra towels are kept."
"Really? Well, last night there was also a standing mirror, and it was enchanted for spying."
As the room erupted in indignant mutterings, Remus cast a surreptitious glance at Severus. The man was still standing alone at the fire and staring fixedly into the flames. He didn't appear to be paying the conversation any attention at all, but his back had gone absolutely rigid.
"Do you have any idea who was spying?" exclaimed Minerva in a horrified voice.
The silence awaiting his answer was so thick with anticipation you could almost touch it, particularly from the direction of the fire.
"No, idea," said Remus mildly. "I reversed the spell as quickly as I could, but all I saw was a blur of movement and a blank wall with a metal bar on it. I assume it was some sort of student prank. I don't suppose for a minute that I was the intended target. The bath is open to all the staff, after all." No need to point out that he was the only staff member with quarters on that floor or that the spy plainly knew who he was looking at.
His eyes drifted over to Severus again, and as he professed to have no idea who'd been spying on him, he could practically see the tension drain from the man like water spilling from a tap.
"A student!" gasped Pomona. "Oh, no, they couldn't possibly."
Minerva frowned thoughtfully. "No student should be able to get into that bathroom. It's charmed to limit access to staff only. On the other hand, charms can be circumvented, and we do have many students who are quite clever enough to manage it."
"Yes, indeed, we do," stated Remus. "Though as there was no real harm done, I'm inclined to let the matter drop."
"Well, you're more forgiving than I'd be at the thought of someone spying on me in the bath," exclaimed Pomona hotly.
"I think I should go and examine that mirror," said Minerva grimly as she stood up and began to walk towards the door. "If it was a student, they might have left traces of their handiwork behind that would identify them. You might be inclined to let the matter drop, Remus, but as Deputy Headmistress, I'm afraid that I am not."
"It's too late for that, unfortunately," said Remus.
"What do you mean?" Minerva turned with her hand on the doorknob.
"I thought of that when I got up this morning, but when I returned to the bathroom, the mirror was gone."
"How frustrating," exclaimed Filius.
"Yes." Remus nodded in agreement, noticing that Severus had now turned and was casually watching them all with a non-committal expression on his thin face, appearing once more to be perfectly at ease. "I suppose we'll never know who was behind it now, but I thought you all should be warned just in case the prankster, whoever he or she is, decides to try again sometime in the future."
oooooooooooooooooo
Severus angrily crumpled the anonymous note with its unwelcome claims and haughty demands and stuffed it into his pocket as he strode across the dark lawn. How could anyone possibly know that mirror in the bath had been his? He'd been so careful! Even Lupin hadn't figured it out, and he was in the best position to do so. The person who'd written the note seemed quite sure of his claim though and said he could prove it as well, so Severus didn't dare not to show up as demanded.
His eyes narrowed thoughtfully, when he was face to face with this odious cretin, perhaps he could find a way to alter his memory or otherwise force him to keep his mouth shut. The last thing he could afford was for Lupin to discover that he'd been behind that enchanted mirror.
As he entered the Forbidden Forest, he scanned the woods around him carefully but saw nothing out of the ordinary in the dim murky light of early evening. He strode ahead to the clearing designated for the meeting and stepped out from beneath the trees.
"I'm here as instructed," he stated to the dark woods in a cold voice.
"Excellent and right on time, too," answered a deep voice he'd never heard before.
"What do you want from me?" asked Severus cautiously.
"Not much, really, I already know what happened. I saw you disposing of the mirror. All I'd have to do is show Lupin the towel rack that hangs on your bathroom wall, I imagine he'd have no difficulty recognizing it as the piece of metal he saw through the mirror. So you might as well admit it."
"Why should I admit anything? You may claim to have all the answers, but claims are not proof."
"Take a look at the stump in the middle of the clearing."
Severus frowned but did as he was told. Lying on top of the stump, illuminated by a shaft of fading sunlight, was a picture of himself removing the enchanted mirror from the staff bathroom. Watching his photographic image as it crept off, looking over its shoulder and carrying that mirror, sent a shiver through Severus. He was caught. No doubt about it.
The voice spoke again. "Shall I go and speak to Lupin? With photographs like that one to back me up, I'll wager he won't need much convincing."
"NO!" The word burst from Severus of its own volition.
"Do you admit to enchanting the mirror then?" the voice asked again.
"All right, damn you, yes, I admit it! Now what price will you have me pay for it?" Severus seethed with anger at being outmaneuvered. His fingers clenched around his wand. If he could only get the blackmailer to come a bit closer, he could deal with him properly, but the next words he heard, uttered by a very familiar voice, wiped all such thoughts from his mind.
"Thank you, Severus. I simply wanted your confirmation of what I already knew," said Remus as he stepped out from behind a tree, hands pushed casually into his pockets and a smile on his face.
"Lupin!" Severus was astounded. When he regained his power of speech, he stated coldly, "You lied in the staff lounge. You knew all the time that I was responsible."
Remus shrugged. "Well, not all the time. I wasn't positive until I saw you go back for the mirror."
"Well, now that you know, what do you plan to do about it?"
Before Remus could answer, Severus continued, suddenly furious at being caught out. "Do you intend to tell Minerva and Albus? Try to get me sacked? It won't work, you know. They know the truth about you, and why you need to be watched. Perhaps I should simply confess and tell the rest of the staff exactly why you're so untrustworthy. They have a right to know what a dangerous creature they're working with after all."
Remus simply stood silently and let Severus's anger and guilt wash over him and drain away. Once the man stood quiet again, Remus removed his hands from his pockets and crossed the clearing to stand directly in front of the Potions master.
"What I do depends entirely on you, Severus. I think we both know that you weren't spying on me because I'm a werewolf or simply because you suspect that I might be untrustworthy."
Severus's breath hitched softly, but he couldn't resist replying in a voice full of disdain. "What other reason could there possibly be?"
Remus smiled. "I can think of at least one. Spying on me elsewhere in the castle could be a sign of suspicion, that's true, but spying on me in the bath? Seems a bit too intimate for that, wouldn't you say?"
Severus licked his lips tensely. "I don't know what you mean."
"Oh, I think you do," Remus said softly. "Once, a very long time ago, there was an attraction between us. When I think back I realize there were so many conversations full of meaning beneath the words, significant looks, almost touches, and one single, amazing kiss. Don't bother to deny it, I remember that kiss in the library stacks as if it were yesterday. I'm sure you do as well."
Severus frowned but said nothing.
Remus took a step closer. "The truth is, I'm still attracted to you, Severus, and I'm betting that you feel the same."
"That's ridicu…" Severus began, but before he could finish, Remus reached out and pulled him into an embrace, kissing him passionately. He held the kiss until Severus's body began to relax against his own, and he could feel his kiss being returned. Then he released Severus and took a short step back. Severus simply glared at him, breathing roughly.
"Ridiculous?" said Remus. "Somehow I don't think so. What happens next is entirely up to you. Do you want me to walk away and never mention this again or do you want something more? The choice is yours."
Silence stretched tautly between them as Remus held his breath and waited to see what Severus would do.
Finally, Severus hissed out his answer in a low voice. "No. I don't want anything from you."
Disappointment sent a shiver of cold through Remus. He'd been so sure Severus's answer would be different, but apparently he'd pushed the man too far, had asked for too much. After a moment of silence, Remus sighed and nodded, not even trying to hide his disappointment. "All right. I'm sorry that's the way you feel, but I won't bring up the matter again. You have my word; no one will ever hear anything about this from me."
Slowly he turned away and took a single step toward the edge of the clearing, but before he could take another, he felt Severus's hand on his arm pulling him back.
"Damn you, Lupin," Severus snarled in a voice full of conflicted intensity and desire.
When Remus turned back toward him, hope rekindled, Severus seized his face in rough hands and pulled him into a savage kiss. The band of coldness inside Remus's chest burst in a flood of sudden warmth, and he pulled Severus closer still, returning the kiss enthusiastically.