Curious
A/N #1: This is for penka67, who wanted to see a story about Jessica interacting with someone besides Wyatt. Hopefully, this is kind of close to what you had in mind, my Timeless friend...thanks for your ceaseless encouragement!
cu-ri-os-i-ty: A desire to know about matters of no concern to one.
The loud, annoying alarm that alerted Wyatt and his team the 'mother ship' just jumped went off in the middle of a really nice moment between the two of them. Jessica had managed to get her husband reminiscing about the early months of their marriage and how happy they'd been, when the (scary at first, but now, just) obnoxious clanging began. Dammit, just when Wyatt had started to relax, too.
Of course, without a word, he'd instantly leapt up from the sofa in front of the television where they'd been sitting and tore off down the corridor to the makeshift launch area where the lifeboat sat, looking like a giant metal eyeball or something. Privately, the time machine's appearance gave Jessica the creeps. The fact that her husband and the others, even Connor, willingly climbed inside and let themselves be hurtled through time and probably space on a regular basis never failed to amaze her.
Sighing in disappointment, Jessica followed at a slower pace, having been in the bunker long enough to know she still had a couple of minutes while the team discussed 'where, when, and possibly why' they would be jumping before it was time to tell Wyatt goodbye. This strange new reality that her husband had dragged her into around a week or so ago had not been an easy adjustment for Jessica. Time travel? Seriously? C'mon, that only happened in movies and television, right? Except, no, Ma'am, it absolutely was real, and as one might imagine, apparently very hazardous.
Although she didn't exactly know her too well yet, Jessica was continually impressed by Jiya's calm certainty that Rufus, the man she loved, would return to her in one piece. Wyatt had told her that his friend was one hell of a pilot, someone he trusted implicitly, and she knew that Wyatt's confidence in the man's skills wasn't something given easily, that Rufus must well deserve it.
Likewise, in her opinion, as the only female member of the team, Lucy Preston had earned Jessica's admiration almost right from the start, if only for her sheer guts alone. And that was before she'd even had the opportunity to witness her bravery first hand at the hospital when the scary redhead tried to cut Lucy's throat. Jessica herself had nearly quit breathing when the other woman ordered Wyatt to take the shot. Damn. Of course, while she had figured out Wyatt and his pretty teammate were involved, obviously emotionally, and probably physically as well, before Jessica had reappeared in his life, the fact that the historian had stepped aside in a heartbeat so they could try to make their marriage work, prompted Jessica to feel much more than respect for the other woman. At the very least, gratitude also, enough that she regretted her 'just a teacher' remark before the three of them went out of the bunker to search for a young JFK (of all people). As soon as the words left her big mouth, Lucy had immediately stiffened up in offense, as well she should have, because it had been a thoughtless thing to say. Jessica probably should have apologized for the unintended cheap shot, but just didn't know how.
Walking into the launch area just behind Agent Christopher, her eyes were naturally drawn to Wyatt, not that he noticed or even acknowledged her presence. No, his attention was focused solely on Lucy, and as they looked at each other and rapidly tossed ideas back and forth, it was like no one else was even there. Wyatt and Lucy might not be romantically involved any more, but the two of them still had an undeniable connection, a closeness that seemed very intimate, at least to Jessica.
She tried not to stare openly at Lucy as the brunette calmly rattled off obscure historical facts the way Jessica could recite the drink menu at work, and she winced inwardly once more at the memory of her off-the-cuff teacher comment.
Waiting patiently for Wyatt to notice her, she frowned in growing disbelief as once the team finished their pre-mission discussion, he turned away from the platform and began to follow Lucy and Rufus up the metal steps to climb into the lifeboat. What the? Not only had Wyatt not even seemed to see her standing there the whole time, he was just going to leave without telling her goodbye? And to really rub salt into the wound, after some kind of childish pissing match between the two men, it looked like Garcia had to actually remind Wyatt his wife was standing there witnessing all of this play out.
Rooted to the floor in embarrassment, it was all a tight-lipped Jessica could do to nod and raise a hand at her husband's last-minute, half-hearted wave before he turned and climbed aboard. She didn't move a muscle as the lifeboat and its four passengers 'jumped' out of existence in 2018, barely feeling the roaring draft of air the massive machine always left in its wake.
Well, good Lord, that hadn't been humiliating at all to see her husband so eager to leap through time (with Lucy, her mind oh-so-helpfully noted) that he completely ignored his wife in front of the others. Not wanting to see the look of pity she was sure each one wore, Jessica turned abruptly on her heel and hurried back to their room (More like prison cell, she thought resentfully) to brood on the inconsiderate way Wyatt acted.
"Only the curious have something to find..." - Unknown
Lying on her back on one of the cots and staring up at the ugly ceiling with its peeling paint and decades of grime, Jessica was dismayed by the instinctive knowledge something was going on with her husband, and had been for the past day or so. How could she have been so blindly confident, taking Wyatt's initially intense feelings at their reconciliation for granted? She felt like a fool. Worried now at the realization that he had been rather preoccupied lately, Jessica would bet a week's worth of tips (no small amount–she was a damn good bartender) that his sullen mood had to do with Lucy Preston.
At first, she had been pleased and surprised, truthfully, when Wyatt skipped the team's usual mission debriefing after Lucy, Rufus, Garcia, and oddly enough, Connor Mason, returned from 1936. Despite her faint uneasiness at the forbidding expression on his face when he walked into their tiny room, Jessica decided to take advantage of having him all to herself, and began trying all the intimate little tricks her husband usually took pleasure in to coax him out of his dark mood.
Unfortunately, just when she had begun to really enjoy herself, it had been somewhat discouraging to get a plainly distracted Wyatt all primed for sex and discover that while his body was performing at its usual satisfactory level, this time, his heart just didn't seem to be in it. During the fifteen years they had been together, clear back since high school, something that never failed to please Jessica when in bed with Wyatt was watching the color of his eyes change as he made love to her. So many beautiful shades of blue that expressed what he was feeling, enough that she never needed fancy words or promises when he touched her so tenderly and looked at her like she was the only woman in the world.
Sadly, that was not the case this time, for while he took care of her needs first, as usual, to her dismay, Wyatt kept his eyes shut tightly the whole time, afterwards, too, even as he'd groaned quietly and collapsed on top of her, panting. Something was wrong–this wasn't like her husband at all. Yes, he was a skilled lover, but privately, it was this very moment each time with him, when his lean, muscular body lay heavily on hers and they were still connected, trying to catch their breath, that was Jessica's very favorite part of making love with Wyatt. She enjoyed holding him in her arms for those few precious moments, the protective warmth and security of him covering her, his blue eyes shining with love and happiness, making her feel special and very much loved.
But that night, for the first time since she had arrived at this depressing hole of a hideout, Wyatt had almost immediately rolled off her after (super awkward because the cots they slept in were narrow and uncomfortable as hell). Too shocked to even react, Jessica had instinctively pulled up the blanket and covered herself before curling on her side. After he hastily cleaned himself up and slipped in behind her, pressing a kiss on the top of her head before quickly falling asleep, she had to fight the urge to cry. What the hell was that?
It had been like having sex with a stranger. Now sure, this Wyatt was not the same as the Wyatt from her time line, she had come to understand that, but aside from a few insignificant things here and there, he still acted quite a bit the way she expected him to. But this was...different...and definitely something significant. Her eyes filled at the bitter awareness that not only had Wyatt been emotionally distant the whole time they were being intimate, he'd physically withdrawn from her afterwards as fast as he possibly could, almost as if he couldn't bear to be that close to her. And that was a sharp blow to her pride.
Jessica thought dealing with her Wyatt and the way he treated her the past couple of years especially, had toughened up her heart considerably, likely a self-protective measure from the type of hurt only someone you love very much can inflict on you. Well, apparently she was ten kinds of wrong about that, judging by the level of stunned bewilderment she was feeling right now.
Even as his strong arms held onto her protectively as he slept, Jessica was upset enough that she barely closed her eyes all night. In the morning, however, Wyatt had acted fine, almost as if he didn't even remember his hurtful actions the night before. Thinking it over, Jessica decided to let go of her upset feelings, that maybe she had overreacted. After all, her husband and the others were under a tremendous strain right now, what with living in hiding and trying to save the world (their words, not hers) on an almost daily basis. She resolutely ignored the tiny voice in her head that gleefully pointed out that Wyatt might be not so discreetly glancing at Lucy more than he usually did.
But now, after what just happened in the launch bay right in front of her very eyes, together with the noticeable change in Wyatt's attitude and behavior in the last day or so, Jessica was not only concerned, but curious. She was aware that in his time line, her husband had lived a very different reality, especially the past eighteen months or since he'd been assigned to this mission. Of course, in typical Wyatt close-mouthed fashion, he'd been extremely stingy with many of the details.
Being kept in the dark about so many things only made her even more determined to find out as much as she could about Wyatt's life before the text she sent that made him aware of her existence. Yes, Jessica Logan had questions, lots of them, and it was past time to look for answers. Sitting up on the side of the cot, she was dismayed to feel tears drying on her face. It had been a long time since she'd cried over Wyatt Logan, and Jessica swore to herself she wasn't about to start that crap up again.
At the doorway, she squared her shoulders and took a deep breath before making her way to the room that Agent Christopher used as an office. Jessica had been surprised to learn that the no-nonsense NSA agent was able to come and go as she pleased while the others were forced to remain hidden from this so-called Rittenhouse organization. She had said as much to Wyatt, but he merely shrugged, too ingrained at following orders to question the actions of his superior officer, much as he and the others chafed at their continuing captivity.
Knocking briskly, Jessica politely waited until she heard the other woman say, "Come in," before hesitantly opening the door. When it was clear the agent wasn't going to invite her to sit down, she sat on the edge of the chair in front of the desk, and waited as calmly as she could. Finally, after several uncomfortably long moments, Denise Christopher raised dark, uninviting eyes to her and asked rather impatiently, "Yes, Mrs. Logan, what can I do for you?" Jessica swallowed her anger at the older woman's chilly attitude and fairly obvious disapproval. ("You catch more flies with honey than vinegar, Jess," her granny always said.)
"Agent Christopher, I'd like to ask you some questions about my husband, please," and Jessica could see she'd managed to surprise the agent. Her heart sank in disappointment, though, at the annoyed frown that rapidly settled between the other woman's dark brows.
"Mrs. Logan, let me speak frankly. You've been a military wife for how many years now? Not only that, but Master Sergeant Logan has been a member of Delta Force, which has its own strict levels of security, for quite some time. Surely you're well aware by now that it's improper for you to ask me anything about this mission," Christopher reminded Jessica in a biting tone. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some rather important work to finish before the team gets back," and returning her gaze to the tablet on the desk in front of her, summarily dismissed Jessica.
Ouch. That was a big strike one. Struggling to hold onto her dignity, Jessica stood and quietly shut the door behind her. She might have guessed she'd get nowhere with the tough-as-nails NSA agent, who had been furious with Wyatt for bringing an unknown (to her) civilian into the bunker during an extended confidential, "need to know" mission. Hey, it wasn't her fault her husband brought her here. She sure didn't want to be stuck here any more than Denise Christopher evidently wanted her to be.
"Curiosity is lying in wait for every secret." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Going down the corridor and swinging back around to the now-empty launch area, Jessica was looking for Jiya, who she thought might be a little more sympathetic, but the younger woman was nowhere to be seen. On the other hand, Connor Mason was sitting on the platform in front of a laptop, and the charming businessman had always been very nice to her. She was hopeful when he looked up at her approach with a smile. "Jessica, what can I do for you?" he asked kindly, pulling out the chair beside him. Taking a seat, she clasped her hands together and fixing a sincere expression on her face, asked the older man if he could tell her anything about the team or its mission.
Jessica knew she was headed for strike two the minute his welcoming demeanor disappeared. Gazing at her with what might be just a touch of pity, Connor sighed, and offered, "Jessica, although I am seldom referred to as someone with an intuitive personality, even I was aware of the awkwardness earlier when the team was leaving for 1919. And while I do feel badly for the rather insensitive way your husband treated you, in front of the rest of us, no less, there's really nothing I'm allowed to tell you about your husband, Dr. Preston, or Rufus. It's all classified, you see, and trust me, there's nothing our favorite NSA agent would like better than to have a good reason to make my life any more miserable than it already is. Now, if there's nothing further I can do for you, I should get back to my calculations here, alright?" At her embarrassed nod, he smiled politely and turned his attention back to the laptop before she even got to her feet.
Jessica was taken aback. What was really going on here? And, Doctor Preston? Jesus, she had no idea Lucy was much more than just a college professor–she had a doctorate? Damn Wyatt for keeping that little detail from her when he'd mentioned in passing how Lucy's endless knowledge of history had saved him, and Rufus, too, on more than one occasion. God, no wonder she was offended when Jessica practically dismissed her profession the way she had. She probably owed Lucy Preston a sincere apology after the team got back for acting like such a bitch to her. What was wrong with her? Her sudden insecurity where her husband was concerned was really getting to her because Jessica didn't usually treat people this way. Something about this place was really messing her up. Well, this was it, she was down to her last source, that is if Jiya would even be willing to talk to her.
Luckily, she was in the kitchen area rummaging through the fridge when Jessica came around the corner. "Hey, Jiya," she greeted her cheerfully, "Do you have a minute? I have a couple of questions, and to be honest, I got nowhere with either Connor or Agent Christopher. Could I please talk to you?" Shutting the refrigerator door, the younger woman gazed intently at Jessica for a prolonged moment before gesturing to a table.
"Take a seat. What is it you want to know? And keep in mind, that there's really not much I can talk about, 'cause it's all..." and grinned wryly when Jessica finished the sentence for her, "classified."
Swallowing hard, Jessica hesitated only a second before she spoke. "Jiya, this is kind of embarrassing, but I know you saw the way Wyatt acted right before the team jumped. God, this is so hard to say, but, is that usually how he is when they are getting ready to go? So intense, so focused?"
Jiya pressed her lips together before asking, "You mean, focused on Lucy?" and her expression softened in sympathy when without warning, Jessica's eyes began to fill with tears. "Hey, I'm sorry, that was out of line," patting her on the arm.
"No," Jessica sniffed, "It wasn't, and I'm sure you know why. It's one of the reasons I wanted to talk to you. I get that Wyatt brought me here without asking anyone, and that none of you know me very well. But for the past day or so, Wyatt hasn't been acting like himself at all, and I don't want to come off as a jealous wife or anything, but..."
"Let me guess, he's barely told you anything at all about Lucy, right? And you're starting to notice the way he is around her?" Unable to do more than nod miserably, Jessica waited while Jiya seemed to mentally debate how much she could share with her. "How about I tell you a little about my experience working with both of them? Truthfully, before we all got stuck here in the bunker, I actually hadn't been around either of them a whole lot because they were always together, whether on missions or downtime afterwards." Jessica nodded in understanding–she was well aware of the powerful bond that could develop between teammates, especially in highly-stressful situations like this.
For nearly an hour, Jiya talked as Jessica tried to process the vivid picture she painted for her. She could almost see the relationship grow between the bitter, grieving widower and the quiet, passionate college professor as the months went by and the team experienced intense, lonely, frightening missions, each one seemingly more dangerous than the one before. The soldier, the professor, and the engineer–all they had were each other. Naturally, they grew attached, especially Wyatt and Lucy. How could they not? Both single, attractive, around the same age, and drawn unwillingly into this time traveling madness. Actually, it was a wonder they hadn't gotten together sooner, Jessica mused to herself.
She did feel slightly better when Jiya confided that in her opinion, Lucy, not quite as burdened by all the grief and sadness that haunted Wyatt for nearly five years before he was assigned to Mason, probably developed feelings for him before he did for her. Jessica smirked inwardly at that. Apparently Wyatt Logan was bone deep stubborn in any time line–what a shocker that was.
Clearing her throat, Jiya leaned across the table and putting her hand on Jessica's arm, delivered the final message loud and clear, "I don't mean this unkindly, and I doubt this is what you hoped to learn, but Jessica, before your return to his life, Lucy was one of the best things that could have ever happened to Wyatt. I think she saved him, because the man you see now is such a different guy than he was 18 months ago, a better guy, and it's all due to Lucy."
Her mind flooded with everything she'd just learned, Jessica abruptly blurted out, "Is my husband in love with Lucy Preston?" and when the other woman sighed and took just a little too long to formulate her answer, she knew. The knowledge sat like a burdensome weight on her chest. Swallowing hard, Jessica managed to thank Jiya for their little talk before getting to her feet and hastily making her way to their room to lay low and await Wyatt's return.
Reluctantly convinced by her husband's fervent desire to stay together and make their marriage work, she'd willfully ignored all the little warning signs that maybe Wyatt was conflicted in his feelings, torn between two very different women. Jessica understood now, with increasing regret, that indulging her curiosity today might not have been the best idea. Well, too late now, the blinders were off for good, and painful as it would probably be, it was long past time for a serious talk with her husband, because living like this, it just wasn't fair to any of them...
"Curiosity can be as dangerous as a butterfly hovering over a flame." - Nancy B. Brewer
A/N #2: The inspiration for this story was the scene in the beginning of the episode when the team was getting ready to leave for 1919 and Wyatt basically ignored his wife until Flynn sniped at him. Like or loathe Jessica, Wyatt was pretty rude to her. Full disclosure-I wrote probably 90 percent of this over last weekend, but just didn't get finished in time to post before the episode aired; therefore, I decided to ignore the revelation at the end that most of us guessed a long time ago-that Jessica is somehow involved with Rittenhouse. That's a fic for another time, my friends :) Thanks to all of you who read, favorite, follow, and most of all review my stories. Your feedback makes the world go 'round...