For the lovely Abby because you're amazing and I adore you.

Gobstones, Purple Stone (appeal): Fake relationship, goal, "I'm not surprised."

Insane House Competition: Fake dating

Serpent Day, black mamba: "It's four in the morning. Of course I was sleeping!"

Word Count: 1295

"Lily, I need to borrow your boyfriend this weekend!"

Lily looks up from her book with raised brows. It isn't uncommon for Sirius to burst into their home at odd hours or for him to have some strange request or idea, but this is definitely a new one. "You… I'm sorry. What?"

Sirius offers her the closest he can manage to an apologetic smile. "Your boyfriend. Ya know, cute disheveled hair, dreamy hazel eyes… I need to borrow him."

It's the second time he's said it, but it still doesn't make sense. Lily waits for him to continue, but he just grins at her like she should understand what he's trying to say. "I know who my boyfriend is," she says, gesturing impatiently for him to continue. "What I don't understand is why you need to borrow him."

"Oh. Right. Well, you know how I've been trying to get disowned? My parents just won't do it. So, I reckon I can show up to the upcoming family reunion with James, pretend he's my boyfriend, and boom! Goal accomplished!"

It sounds ridiculous, even for Sirius. He has come up with plenty of interesting and weird ideas to try and get disowned, but it never seems to work. "Have you spoken to James about this?"

"Of course. He said I've always had beautiful eyes, and it would be his pleasure."

Lily snorts, rolling her eyes. Of course James would see the appeal of it. "I'm not surprised," she chuckles.

"Can I borrow him?"

Lily shrugs. If James doesn't have a problem with, she doesn't see why it should bother her. It isn't like they had plans for the weekend, and it might be nice to have a few days to herself. "Go ahead," she says. "But stay out of trouble."

Grinning broadly, Sirius leans down, pecking her cheek. 'I always stay out of trouble."

"Right. And pigs can fly," she mutters.

"Really? How do they stay in the air?"

"Get out, Sirius."

…

"Lil. Pst, hey, Lil. You asleep?"

Lily glances at the clock on the bedside table. "It's four in the morning," she groans. "Of course I was sleeping!"

She still sits up. When James is in a talkative mood, there's no stopping him. Plus she hasn't seen him since he and Sirius left the day before, so she doesn't mind sacrificing her sleep for him. "How was the reunion?"

"We are asked not so politely to leave the premise the moment Sirius said I was his boyfriend," James answers with a mock pout. "But Sirius is a lovely boyfriend. He took me out for dinner and a movie."

Lily grins. James and Sirius really took the whole fake dating thing to a new level. Really, it's not surprising; when the two of them hatch some ridiculous scheme, they go all out. "Should I be jealous?" she asks.

The only light in the room is the moonlight filtering in through the curtain, but there's no denying the pink that stains his cheeks. Lily raises her brows, unable to fight the flutter of nervousness.

"What do you think about Sirius?" James asks, and Lily wonders if he's deliberately trying to avoid her question.

"Um… He's… Nice?"

"Yeah, he is. But do you think he's, I dunno, boyfriend material?" he presses.

Now it's her turn to blush. She still remembers being eleven years old and thinking that boy with black hair and grey eyes was the cutest thing in the world. Even when she started dating James later, she couldn't deny it. Sirius Black is, and always has been, gorgeous. The fact that he's an amazing guy once you get past his arrogance only makes him more attractive.

"Why do I feel like this is a trap?" Lily asks.

"You do!" James claps his hands together, laughing. "Thank God!"

Her confusion only deepens. James isn't making any sense. She's certain that most people in a committed relationship would be upset about that, but James looks downright excited.

"Thank God?" she echoes.

"I'm not the only one."

Lily takes a deep breath, trying to understand. It isn't a problem if James happens to be bisexual. She loves him regardless. Still, it's a lot to take in. "Why did you ask if I think he's boyfriend material?"

"Hear me out, okay? Nothing weird. I promise. But maybe… How would you feel about inviting someone else into our relationship?"

It's an innocent enough question, but she can't help but to feel hurt by it. Is this his way of telling her that she isn't enough for him? Why would he want a boyfriend when he has her?

James seems to pick up on her unease. He reaches out and pulls her closer, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "Shh. It's not like that," he assures her. "We both adore Sirius, so we'd both be dating him. And each other. And… I know it sounds complicated, and if you don't want to try, that's totally fine. I just thought…"

"We'll give it a try," she says.

James pulls back, a smile tugging at his lips. "Are you sure? If you're uncomfortable with it…"

Lily shakes her head. It's strange, something she's never even considered. But hearing her boyfriend talk about it makes her curious and a little bit excited. "Nothing kinky, right?"

"Not unless all parties consent to it," he assures her with another kiss.

"Well, I guess we should invite Sirius over for breakfast then."

…

Lily hasn't felt this nervous since her first date with James. She usually doesn't make a big deal out of breakfast, but this is important. James sets the table, complete with an elegant white lace tablecloth and a vase with flowers. Lily watches, grinning as she adds eggs to each plate. "Still a hopeless romantic," she teases.

Sirius doesn't even bother to knock. By now, he's such a common fixture in their home, that he's comfortable enough to just waltz in like he owns the place. "Fancy," he chuckles, tapping one of the roses. "Did I miss the memo that we were going on a breakfast date?"

Lily and James exchange glances. Her heart flutters nervously, and she groans. It's just Sirius; there's no need for her to feel so flustered.

"Funny you should say that," James says, sitting down and plucking a strip of bacon from the plate before popping of into his mouth. "How would you like to actually date us?"

Lily stares at her boyfriend, jaw slack. Only James would be bold enough to just say it outright. She doesn't know if she should be impressed or smack him.

"Wouldn't I be a third wheel?" Sirius laughs. "I mean, it would probably be irritating for me to follow you guys around all the time."

"Not… Not accompanying us on a date as our friend," James says. "We want you to be our date. Our… our boyfriend."

The fact that James stumbles over it is a small comfort. He's always so suave and smooth, and it's nice to know that he can get flustered too. The great and mighty James Potter is human after all.

"Your boyfriend?"

Lily doesn't even realize she's holding her breath until her chest begins to ache. She breathes deeply, hoping no one notices her awkwardness.

Sirius grins. "Really?" he asks. "This is actually a really honor! I love you guys so much. Just so cute… So, so cute. And you want me to be a part of this cuteness?"

Lily covers her mouth to keep from giggling. Sirius is so dramatic, and she loves it. "Is that a yes?"

Sirius climbs to his feet and walks over. He presses a kiss to her cheek before turning to James and kissing his cheek as well. "Yes."