BILL HAS DONE IT. HE HAS PINE TREE AND SHOOTING STAR IN ONE HAND AND SIXER AND STAN IN THE OTHER.

NOW, FOR DRAMATIC EFFECT IN SELECTING WHO TO KILL. "EENIE..." BILL'S EYES SHOWED A PINE TREE.

"MEENIE..." BILL'S EYES FLASHED TO SHOOTING STAR.

"MINY..." A PINE TREE.

"M..."

"STOP!" SIXER CRIED HOARSELY. BILL'S EYES STOPPED FLASHING AND TURNED TO HIM.

"I'LL GIVE IT TO YOU." SIXER LOOKED AT HIM PLEADINGLY. "JUST LET THEM GO."

BILL LAUGHED. NOT AT A VICTORY, BUT AT THE FUTILITY OF THE RUSE. OBVIOUSLY, THIS WAS STANLEY, A REALLY RETARDED ATTEMPT TO TRICK HIM. THEY... THEY REALLY THOUGHT THEY COULD FOOL BILL CIPHER... THE OMNIPOTENT GOD... WITH A GLOVE? A GODDAMNED GLOVE?

HE TOOK STAN'S OUTSTRETCHED HAND AND SHOOK IT GINGERLY. IMMEDIATELY, HE WAS PLUNGED INTO THE WHITENESS OF STAN'S DREAMSCAPE.

"AT LAST!" HE SCREAMED FOR NO REASON. PRETENDING THAT HE WON "HAHAHAHAHA!" SOME MENACING LAUGHTER. STAN'S DREAMSCAPE WAS NOWHERE AS COMPLEX AS SIXER'S. THERE WERE LITERALLY ONLY ONE FLOATED TOWARDS THE LONE ERECT GATE AND SLAMMED IT OPEN.

REVEALING STANLEY PINES. NOT STANFORD PINES. HE WAS PLAYING THIS WEIRD PING PONG BALL GAME FOR LOSERS.

"WHAT? IMPOSSIBLE! THE DEAL'S OFF!" BILL COULD PRETEND TO LOSE PRETTY WELL WHEN HE WANTS TO, COULDN'T HE. HE EXTENDED HIS HAND, CONJURED UP A BLUE ENERGY BEAM TO KILL STAN, BUT EXTINGUISHED IT AT THE LAST MOMENT. THIS WAS HIMSELF. IF HE KILLED STAN, HE DIES TOO. HE COULDN'T LOSE CONTROL.

HE AND STAN PROCEEDED TO HAVE A CONVERSATION. HE FEIGNED DESPERATION, AND STAN THOROUGHLY THOUGHT BILL WAS DEFEATED. THEN STAN PUNCHED BILL IN THE GUT AND EVERYTHING WENT BLACK.

Bill really doesn't approve of the Axolotl's opinions on decor. Pink sky and cotton candy clouds? Really? A dream demon's realm was supposed to be horrifying and send shivers down your spine, not a little girl's wet dream.

"Axel. Hey." Bill twirled his cane playfully.

"Mason." The Axolotl greeted him back. "Did your despicable plan fail?"

"Don't call me that."

"Why do you not like that name? It's cute. Was it, uh, too masculine for you?" the Axolotl's lips didn't move, but it was obvious he was teasing Bill.

"Well, there we go again, Axel. This is why no one talks to you. You bully people." Bill poked Axolotl's eyes playfully.

"You call this bullying, Dipper?" Axolotl swatted the cane away. "No wonder Mason was too masculine for you. Alright, no more playing. I'll fulfill our promise, even through you what, tried to collapse an entire planet. Don't do that again. So, where do you want to respawn?"

"God damn it, Axel, don't make this sound like Minecraft. Take me, uh, let's see, where did I use to live? Ah, yes. Piedmont, California, the McDonalds on York Boulevard. Kill mom and dad. Yeah, that sounds good."

The Axolotl nodded. Everything went black again.

I'm back.