A/N: And here comes the third installement of "The End" trilogy. Following 'This is the End' and 'Seven Degrees of Demolition', we finally come to closure. Thanks, everyone, for joining me in the ride! And because I'm a troll, I'll be posting this in chapters - most of this is already written, just the very end is still struggling. *glares*

A/N2: Recently, when I was browsing the old kink meme I actually found the promt which fitted the idea for this trilogy of mine. It was titled "annoyed Kirk is annoyed":

Okay, so we've had quite a few fics where Kirk is in a relationship with someone and then he has to sleep with someone because of Starfleet or he's raped or whatever and then his lover assumes that Kirk cheated and then suddenly everyone on the Enterprise blames Kirk. Then Kirk gets sad and depressed until everything is revealed and everyone apologises.

Well.

I want this but I want Kirk to get really pissed off by the fact that everyone just assumes that he cheated and that no one has asked him what happened. So he's suffering from both the trauma of rape as well as the actions of his crew. Kirk is pissed so he's like 'fuck this shit' and gets himself transfered 'cos there's no point captaining a ship when your own crew don't believe your word. SO let's say Kirk goes to another ship or something and builds a rep there (doesn't even have to be as captain) and is awesome. Then somehow what really happened gets revealed and the Enterprise crew is like 'oh we fucked up BAD'. Cue a confrontation between Kirk and Crew. Ending is up to anon. Bonus is Bones believes Kirk and goes with him.

And as you can imagine, I was all teary eyed and 'oh my, great minds think alike!'

Summary: I own or won nothing, just the fanfic is completely my fault.

One

Ever since you set your feet on board of a space ship (all those years ago before today; before you were made to go through hell and before the world as you know was almost at its end), you knew that being in space, in the blackness which took your father and which hides unknown planets and people, friends, allies and enemies.

Part of you never wanted to return to space after what happened those months ago – but Bones just nagged at you long enough to make you reconsider and apply for another spaceship. You made his promise you he will continue being your primary physician, and you were content when he grumbled a lot but promised to follow you in the black again.

Starfleet granted you a smaller ship, USS Saratoga. It looked nothing like the silver lady Enterprise, the crew may not have such high ratings as your previous crew had – but every single one of them meets your gaze when you come on board and you know that this crew will always have your back. Enterprise Incident, as the whole thing is now unofficially called, showed an ugly precedent about not supporting your Captain, and crews watching their Captains more closely now are reported all that often now.

Part of you had been nervous that you will meet Enterprise at every 'corner' of the space – but Starfleet showed some brains (or maybe Chris and Old Spock showed enough stubbornness to win over the rest of admiralty – Old Spock may not be admiral himself, but he knows damn well how to apply some political pressure, and Chris knows the other admirals all too well, so he knows how to deal with them) and you are sent to the other side of Federation space, and only rarely come in communication range with Enterprise.

Enterprise herself got a new Captain, Jason Morrick. You know the guy – he's strict but fair; you met him several times while you were planetside and he asked you to tell him more about the crew he was supposed to get. You liked the guy – he used to teach at the Academy, when he was planetside, too, and before the trial you are rather certain that you heard him yelling at bunch of gossiping cadets to mind their own business and stuff their prejudices where sun does not shine.

You shared some stories of times which were good and of times which were not so good, as well as about characters of the senior crew. So he knows that Chekov slips back into Russian when nervous or agitated and that he can count the variables for emergency transport quicker than computer.

He knows that Sulu can out-fence bunch of angry Romulans and fly the ship more efficiently than three other helmsmen.

He knows that Spock can manage to be chief science officer, as well as be the First Officer – and still have energy to take a shift in science labs.

He knows that Uhura can translate in or from almost 90% of Federation languages now and glare daggers at anyone who dares to doubt her proficiency.

He knows that Scotty can repair everything with a gulp of scotch and roll of stick tape.

And, of course, he knows how bitter is the taste it leaves in your mouth that no matter of their brilliance, they still failed in what makes crew a good crew.

Never let your Captain down.

To say that you were surprised that the Enterprise crew remained mostly the same, with exception of Captain and CMO is an understatement. Part of you expected the crew to be divided to several other ships – but when you mention it to Bones, he just snorts and mumbles: "Wanted to have them troublemakers all in one place," and it makes sense, when said like that.

In the rare messages you receive from Jason – sent through Chris – he mentions that the crew is very much subdued; especially the command crew. They had been behaving, you are told, their work exceptional. Nothing less could be expected, though – they still have the highest genius-in-the-house ratio. You feel a bit proud at their accomplishment – just like Jason – but he keeps it from showing too much. He mentions that all of them seem to be keeping to themselves, staying aside from other crews, when more ships meet at shore-leave.

Part of you misses them – but your new command crew is eager to better themselves, to prove themselves to be good. You briefly think about them – one of your acquaintances from time before the Starfleet Academy would say that you are just enjoying your freak show, since there is higher number of aliens in your new crew.

Communication officer M'Ress, a young Caitian woman, starts to learn several new languages in her free time.

Helmsman Akari can be found in simulators, improving his manoeuvring technique together with navigator Arex, who, just for a change, is Edosian – and in fact better at navigating than even Chekov was (part of you think it must be the extra hands, the long years of practice and the fact that this guy used to be one of Chekov's instructors).

The Second Officer, brisk and usually quiet engineer Filars, often comes to you to ask about the latest upgrades she would like to install – and while she's at it, she usually pokes you in the ribs and says you are not eating enough, just like a mother would – and then almost drags you to officer mess.

First Officer, an Andorian of name Thelin reminds you of Spock in some aspects – the same logical approach, the same brilliant mind. But unlike Spock, Thelin actually smiles time to time, actually flashes jokes and plays pool so well that he definitely gives you run for your credits every time you two play.

Together with Bones by your side it's like home.

You once mention it to Thelin when you are playing pool. Corners of his mouth rise a bit. "That is a sentiment I can relate to, Captain," he says in his quiet voice, his antennas leaning your way. "Family, the born into or received, is of most importance to us Andorians."

It still comes like a surprise when you are 'hiding' in your cabin on your birthday (because there are many wrong connotations to the date that not even calls from Chris, Old Spock or Joanna can make it brighter), only to be called by the intercom to the mess hall – for a surprise birthday party. The crew made you (and themselves) an absolutely enormous cake, with sugar coating and writings of "Happy Birthday!" in who knows how many languages.

You remember birthday celebration of the other Jim, the one whose memories showed in the impromptu mind-meld on Delta Vega. The decorations are there, the cake is there, the singing is there – just the crew is different.

But the knowledge no longer sends painful pangs in your chest.