Affectionate Obsessions

Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize.

Hey! So, another new story. Just for those who are wondering, I deleted Blood Red because I know I couldn't possibly continue it, with all the other fics I'm already juggling. I'll probably repost it again after I finish at least 1 or 2 fics. But anyway, this is the one story I'm sort of proud about. I started writing it at around February, and my friends seemed to like it, and I hope you will to. Oh yes, a little note: Forgive me if Sirius acts impossibly crazy and stupid in this fic. I just found it quite funny if he was like that. Please read, and review, and most of all, ENJOY!

Chapter 1

Of Spying and "Mortal" Support

Hogwarts was not what you could consider a normal magical school. It was a place wherein potion explosions were considered normal, where classes were usually out of the ordinary, and no one would think that almost loosing an eye just by going near a tree with some anger management issues as odd. It had, however, like most schools, its own share of gossip and news.

And out of all the words passed around, the most popular one was undeniably the fact that James Michael Potter was utterly and completely obsessed over Lily Elizabeth Evans.

Which would explain perfectly why he was now hiding inside a broom cupboard with his best mates, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew cramped inside as well.

"Prongs," Sirius said impatiently, "Would you remind me again why we're here?"

James turned as much as he could, what with the cramped space and all, and faced his friend. "Because Padfoot," he said, his voice sounding like he was giving instructions to an impossibly stubborn child, "We have to spy on Evans. I hear she passes this corridor every afternoon after her last period class".

Sirius shook his head. "No mate, I think you misunderstood me. When I said 'we', I meant me, Remus, and Peter. We don't want to spy on Lily, you know. Only you do".

"Why are we here? We're here to give James moral support, duh," Peter answered for him. James nodded in agreement as he continued peeking through the impossibly small hole.

"Mortal support? What the hell is that?" Sirius asked.

"Moral support, Padfoot, MORAL support," Remus corrected with a long-suffering sigh. He then spoke to James. "James, why exactly do you want to spy on Lily?"

"Because, Moony, she has a new lavender sweater. I want to see her wearing it, since she hasn't seen me all day. Who knows, she might change her mind about me today," he replied.

"OW!" James suddenly exclaimed as Sirius, being the nearest, smacked him up the head. "What the heck was that for?" he asked angrily.

It was Remus who answered this time. "For being a complete idiot. You took me from the close and intellectual confines of the library--------"

"-----and you took me from the kitchens------" Peter joined in.

"-----and you took me from admiring my reflection in the mirror-------" Sirius said as well.

"-----and brought us into this cramped, uncomfortable, not to mention, filthy cupboard just so you could see the so called love of you life in a new SWEATER!" Remus said, disbelief and annoyance lacing his voice.

"Yes," James said clearly, his tone implying that spying on the girl you liked just to see her on a new sweater was considered normal. The others gave exasperated sighs.

"Why didn't you just see her during class?" Peter said.

"I don't have any classes with her today," he replied in a voice of deep sorrow.

"Couldn't you just have seen her in the corridors, or in the Great Hall? Then maybe you could have spared us from enduring these indignities," Remus asked.

"No I can't. Not since she placed a restraining order charm against me. Now I can't be more than 3 meters from her, and the only time I can get near is when someone is between us," James explained in the same, sorrowful voice.

"And why did she cast the charm in the first place? Oh yes, I remember, It was because you kept on acting like an insane stalker!" Sirius joined in. "Oh Lily, Lily, you look so beautiful today," he mimicked his best friend. "Even when you fell onto the mud that made you look like an overgrown Chocolate Frog and-----HEY!" he shouted in indignation as James threw cobwebs at him.

"You know James, Padfoot's right. Isn't you crush on Lily getting a little too………." Remus said carefully, trying to find the right word that wouldn't result in getting cobwebs thrown at him. It was a well known fact that spider webs and Remus Lupin did not mix well together.

"Obsessive….." Peter muttered, finishing Remus's sentence.

James turned around fully to face Peter, hitting Remus, who also hit Sirius in the process. Peter cowered. "What did you say, Wormtail?" he demanded.

"I uh….I said….oh yeah, I said, uh…..orangutan!" Peter looked quite pleased at the lie he had made up. "I like them," he added.

His friends looked at him strangely. "Orangutan? What the heck are you talking about this time, Wormtail? Urgh, I hate it when you talk about something I don't understand!" Sirius said.

"Sirius, in order to clear your hopelessly mundane mind, I will clarify for you. An orangutan is a large long-armed ape of Borneo and Sumatra having arboreal habits or in other words, likes inhabiting or frequenting trees," Remus explained.

"And you like these animals because?" Sirius asked Peter, now remembering the odd little stuffed animal on Peter's bed.

"What? They're cute!" Peter said defensively.

"You're weird, Peter," Sirius said solemnly, as if stating a fact.

"Will you lot shut up; I think I see her coming already!" James hissed. His eyes widened. "Oh my god, she's here! In this corridor! Wearing her lavender sweater! And not alone...Wait! She's not alone! Crap, who is she with, I can't see from here, the damn hole's too small!" James was now practically hyperventilating.

"Of for goodness sake, James, let me see," Remus made to move forward, but Sirius bustled forward, knocking off James, and Remus, and Peter towards each other.

Ignoring the exclamations of hurt and cursing of his friends, Sirius leaned in and peaked. "I see them!" Sirius finally said, "Tough luck, Prongs. Looks like she's with Jonathan Danes".

"Jonathan Danes? That patheric Ravenclaw seeker? Why the hell is she with him?" James asked, now looking angry.

Sirius turned away from the eyehole and said, "Duh, James. This corridor is really popular for doing…..stuff".

"Why that little---let me at him—I'll murder him—no, I'll kill hi first, bury him, then kill him again----" James was seething.

Deciding that this apparent showcase of lunacy had gone too far, Remus bustles forward—knocking over his three friends in the process—and peaked in.

"Oh for goodness—James, Lily isn't with Jonathan. She's with Kaylie!" Remus reported in an extremely exasperated tone of voice.

James stopped in midsentence about his 101-ways-to-kill-and-torutre-mercilessly-Jonathan-Danes and said, "What? B-but Sirius said that she was with Danes".

"And who is usually more likely to tell a falsehood, me or Sirius?"

To answer, James came forward—once again hurting his three friends—and looked for himself. Sure enough, he saw Lily Evans helping out her best friend, Kaylie Morgan. The two didn't look like they were about to leave just yet, as Kaylie's bag had split, and they both had no wands with them at that moment, having sent it to their professor for a monthly wand check.

"Why the heck did you lie to me, Padfoot?" James said in annoyance.

Sirius shrugged. "No reason. I just like seeing you al mad, I suppose. It makes you look like a drunken house-elf".

Peter looked at Sirius. "That's evil, Padfoot".

"I'm Sirius Black. What do you expect?" Sirius replied arrogantly.

James rolled his eyes. "Okay, king and queen of randomness, shut up. I want to hear their conversation.

Remus looked deeply shocked. "James, don't you know anything about the word privacy? You are about to intrude on one of the most mystifying conversations of the female species wherein they talk about everything completely alien to us".

James replied, not breaking off his contact with the door. "Could you repeat that again, Moony, 'cuz I didn't understand a word you just said".

Remus sighed, wondering why he cursed with such dense friends. "Girl talk, James. Girl talk".

"Why do even want to listen to them?" Peter asked.

"Duh, they might talk about me. Who knows, maybe Lily will confess that she actually likes me," James explained.

Suddenly, he heard the words, "James Potter", coming from Lily, and he listened in more intently.

"So like I was saying Lily," Kaylie Anne Morgan said to her friend. "I want you to give me an honest answer. What do you really think about James Potter?"

Lily hesitated for awhile, and James pressed his ear even deeper into the door. Finally she spoke.

"Okay, fine. I think that James Potter is the most arrogant, presumptuous, annoying, bullying jerk I know," she said "Not to mention creepy, weird, cute-------" Lily, horrified, pressed her hand to her mouth after she said that.

"WHAT! SHE SAID I'M CUTE! YES! LILY THINKS I'M CUTE!" James yelled ecstatically, trying to do a dance, which only resulted in hitting his friends as well. "I HAVE TO TALK TO HER! I HAVE TO----"

At that moment when James forced the door open, the poor door broke away, and James lost balance and fell to the floor with a loud THUD. His friends who had been trying to leave, also lost their balance and Remus, Sirius, and Peter, all fell in rapid succession…….on top of James.

Lily and Kailey, who had been watching the rather disturbing scene with bewildered expressions, now burst out laughing.

"You can get off of me now, you guys," James said with as much strength as he could for someone trapped beneath 3 teenagers.

"Nah," Sirius said, not getting off. Remus and Peter had already complied. "I like sitting on top of you. You're really lumpy, like a pillow or a marshmallow".

"Padfoot, get the hell off of me, you prat, I am not a bouncing ball," James said through gritted teeth.

Sirius looked genuinely baffled. "You sure about that, Prongs? I know let's test it to see if you're right," And with that he promptly started bouncing off of James, going up and down with a loud THUD. The cries of pain and cursing from his best friends were blatantly ignored.

Finally, and to James intense relief, Sirius got off. "You're right Prongs. You're not bouncy, I don't like you at all," he declared.

James stood up with difficulty, sputtering as he regained his breathing. He was pretty sure that half his bones were broken by now.

Still he managed to flash a smile at Lily, who still had an amused expression on her face.

"Hi Evans," he said smoothly.

"My, my, Potter, in a closet? With your best male friends? Hmm, I didn't know you swung that way," Lily replied, smirking.

James reddened. "It's not like that at all, Evans, I swear".

"Enlighten me".

Remus cut in at this point. "He wanted to see you, Lily. According to him, he wanted to see you in your new sweater".

Lily's eyes narrowed, but an amused smile curved her lips. "Is that so? Now, why don't you tell me why the three of you are with him? He forced you to come along, didn't he?"

"We were there to give him mortal support, of course,"" Sirius said. "And we went willingly, just so you know".

Remus hissed, "Moral, Padfoot, MORAL!"

Lily wasn't fooled for a second. "Sirius, you're not a very good liar. Did you go willingly?"

"Um……." Peter hesitated. "Yes?"

Lily sighed. "What did Potter threaten you with?"

Knowing that it was useless to lie, Sirius said, "He threatened to take away my Chocolate Frogs, and to throw my mirror into the fire!"

"He threatened to burn all my books. Have you heard of such atrocity? Can you imagine a wonderful work of Chaucer in the fire? I should say not!" Remus said, affronted and horrified at the very thought. Both he and Sirius held accusatory tones.

"He threatened to throw my stuffed orangutan teddy bear into the lake!" Peter said with bravado.

They all looked at him.

"What? They're cute and cuddly!" Peter defended.

James merely shook his head. "So Evans? Go out with me?"

Lily laughed, the sound sardonic. "After what I just saw? And more importantly, after I just witnessed just how stalkerish you can be? No way, Potter". Even if Remus and Sirius were in between them, James still couldn't get to see her properly.

"Come on, Evans. You know you want to. You know I won't cheat on you. I'm not like that jerk Mark Henderson who cheated on you for Shiera Peters," James said. Realizing the implications of his words, he covered his mouth and looked at his friends, whose friends were shaking.

Lily stiffened. "Don't you ever mention him ever again, Potter, you insensitive jerk!" she snapped angrily before turning away and leaving. Kailey threw the boys an apologetic look before following her friend.

He tried to run after her, yelling, "Evans! Hey Evans!" But when he getting close to her, a blindly bright light shone, then a loud bang, and James was thrown off his position and brought back to where his friends were.

"Damn restraining order charm…." James muttered painfully. He slumped to the floor, Sirius following.

"Face it, James. She hates you," he said sympathetically.

"You think?" was his best friends' sarcastic reply before he buried his head in his hands, wishing he could just disappear into thin air.