After Finnick died I didn't know what to do. Especially when I was carring his child. So after the rebellion I went home. Home to District 4. Seeing all the distruction to our home was heart breaking. Seeing the people Finn and I grew up with, the people we would laugh with, the people who we knew the most crying and starving. That was heart breaking. As I walked on I started to remember, remember the memories Finn and I made together. When I got to the end of the street staring at me was the home Finnick and I wanted to have. That home was the place we were going to raise our children together and make a new life for us. I am 5 months pregnant now, and I still don't know what to do. I am so confused.
Today baby Finnick came into the world. I look at him and I see Finnick's face and feel confort. Katniss and Peeta have travel back and fourth from district 12 to district 4 to check on me. They seem to be getting there life on track as well. The Hunger Games and the Rebellion really gets to a person, but in the end everyone is getting through it. Like Johanna and Haymitch. Just last week I heard that Johanna is going to have a child. Thats nice and I am sure that Haymitch is happy as well. Last time Katniss and Peeta came down Peeta told me that he wanted kids, but Katniss dosn't want any right now. I hope she agrees soon because even though I have only had baby Finn for a few hours now I know he is a blessing to me, and he would be to Finnick if he was here.
Today is baby Finnick's first is here Katniss and Peeta, Johanna and Haymitch, even Gale. I have noticed that my baby boy is looking more and more like his daddy every day, and I am not the only one that has noticed this either. Earlier Katniss pulled me aside and pointed that out to me.
All I could do is smile and say"Yep, thats my little Finnick."
Other things have also happened to. Johanna and Haymitch have a beautiful baby girl named Rebel. I think it is a weird name, but they named her that because if it wasn't for the rebellion, all of this would have never been able to happen. Even Katniss and Peeta are excited to. Last month Katniss felt sick so Peeta rushed her to the docter. That is when they found out that Katniss is also going to have a baby. I am filled with joy because it is my baby's fist birthday and all of my friends seem very happy.
My baby is growing up so fast. Today he caught his first fish and yesterday he completed his first net. He is running around and speaking and he is only 3. But, the only thing I don't know how to handle is him asking my where his father is. He is only asking this because he sees Rebel who is now 2, calling for her father and he sees Nightlock who is Katniss and Peeta's daughter calling for Peeta because that is the only thing she knows. Katniss and Johanna are so happy because they have a full family. I kind of feel left out though because they both have husbands and can still have more kids with them. Katniss is pregnant again. Thanks to modern teghnology the docters at 12 told her she is going to have a baby boy this time. Peeta is really excited because now he has someone to carry on ghe family name. I am happy for them, but in a way I feel luckiest, because I have Finnick, and nothing is better.
It is just Finnick and I today. No one is here visiting for once. Katniss and Peeta went home to 12 to have the baby and Haymitch, Johanna, and Rebel went to 7 to live and have family time. So today it is just him and I in this big house spending time together. I am happy I have him and he is happy he has me. I miss Finnick every day from when I wake up to when I go to sleep. Sometimes I dream about him. The whole family just swimming in the , its not real. What is real though is my child, my sweet kind child here with me and that's all that counts.