Author's note: I swear it wasn't this dark in my head, but it seemed like I should just go with it. Things should be looking up in the next few chapters, though, if things go even vaguely according to plan. Thankyou for reading! xx

Disclaimer: For better or worse, Glee's not mine.

1. Prologue

Rachel had just picked up her book and settled her feet on the porch railing when there was a crunching of gravel on the drive. The spring growth of trees eclipsed everything beyond the bend, but she watched the curve until a car nudged into view. She squinted but couldn't see the driver through the shifting reflection of sky and forest in the windshield.

Blue's ears had perked up, but he didn't move from his bed. "Useless mutt," Rachel muttered, getting up and moving to stand in front of the door.

The car pulled up next to hers. The engine went quiet, and everything was again consumed by the sound of breeze-rippled leaves and songbirds.

The car's door released, paused, swung open. Quinn stepped out and shut the door; the sound echoed through the clearing around the cabin. Rachel pulled in a deep breath, flushing out all the cobwebs and dust that had settled in her lungs over the past weeks. She crossed her arms over her stomach and clutched her sides hard, until it felt like bruising.

She swallowed and bit her lip, pulled herself into the sting of it to ward off the hot tears gathering in her throat.

Quinn shook her head, then climbed the porch steps and pulled Rachel into her.

Rachel's lip gave under her teeth; the taste of copper was sharp on her tongue. "I'm really glad you're here," she choked out, tucking her nose into Quinn's shoulder.

Quinn's arms tightened around her, and she felt Quinn press a kiss to her hair and the accompanying stuttered sigh of hot breath.

.

"Can I get you a cup of coffee?" Rachel asked.

Quinn eased onto the couch on the porch. "That's alright," she said, looking out into the trees, "I've had three this morning already. My flight got in at six." She looked to where her hands sat clasped white on her lap, then up at Rachel. Her eyes were red-rimmed, drawn at the edges. "Just-sit. Please."

Rachel nodded and perched on the couch next to her. She sniffled and ran the back of a hand under her eyes then leaned over her lap, squeezing her hands between the bones of her knees.

"Come here," Quinn whispered, resting a hand on Rachel's thigh. Rachel turned into her; the fist in her throat pulsed. She pulled in a shaky breath and let Quinn wrap her up again.

"It's not that I'm not upset," Quinn said, "I just didn't know where you were. No one knew where you were. But-fuck-I didn't know-" She tucked her face to Rachel's skin and breathed her in.

"I didn't think," Rachel whispered.

"Clearly," Quinn said, with all the solidity of a dam in a flood. She sighed. "Do you want to tell me what happened?"

Rachel cleared her throat. "I just-I kinda freaked."

"Care to elaborate?"

Rachel sat up and pulled feet up, tucking her legs into criss-cross-applesauce. She took one of Quinn's hands between her own and ran a thumb over the knuckles, all the while teasing the bite mark in her lip. "I-" she paused and cleared her throat, "I don't really know what happened. I just panicked, I guess. It was three am and I couldn't breathe so I got in the car and drove up here. I left messages for everyone, though-I could just see Kurt phoning in a missing persons and what a shitstorm that would cause."

Quinn's hand tensed. She looked away, back to the tree line. "You didn't leave me a message," she said. Her voice broke off at the edges. "And Kurt's been calling and not getting an answer-I was calling and not getting an answer-"

"My cell drops service halfway up the drive. And, well, I wasn't exactly keen on checking my messages. I can imagine that Kurt is pretty upset with me."

"We can talk about him later," Quinn said. "I don't-why didn't you call?"

Rachel drew in a shaky breath. "After two months of silence, I didn't know if I should," she said shortly.

Quinn pulled away and dropped her head into her hands. "I didn't hear from you, either, Rachel."

"Don't you dare put this all on me, Quinn. I realize that it was childish-cowardly-to run off just because things got difficult. But don't for one second think that I haven't spent every night for the last two months thinking about you." Her voice was constricted by that fist in her throat. She wiped at her eyes.

The sounds from beyond the tree line consumed them. Rachel swallowed and ran a firm thumb over the hard bone of her knee.

"Is this falling apart?" Quinn finally asked.

"I don't know."

"Do you want it to be?"

"God, Quinn. No. Do you?"

Quinn shook her head; her face finally cracked.

"Can we just-can we stop being in the world for a bit?" Rachel reached for Quinn, who nodded and fell into her. Rachel rubbed her back and clutched her to her chest. "It's alright," she whispered. "It-It will be."