AN: I do not own Teen Wolf, because if I did Sterek would be canon. The only thing that's mine is the plot and any original characters I might add in. Enjoy.
Stiles didn't know when things had started turning for the worst.
Sometime between Scott becoming a werewolf and now, things had begun to deteriorate. Scott was so absorbed in Allison, and his sudden popularity, that Stiles didn't even notice when they started drifting apart. One moment everything was fine, Stiles and Scott were inseparable, and the next... It wasn't only Stiles and Scott's relationship that was affected when Scott was turned, things between Stiles and his dad had been heating up, just waiting for the worst moment to explode. The thing was, it could have been avoided if Stiles just told his dad the truth, but Stiles knew he couldn't. His dad was all he had left, he couldn't risk his dad dying in some supernatural battle, and he also couldn't risk his dad trying to separate him from the pack. So Stiles lied, and everytime he did, that explosion grew bigger and bagger because his dad knew something was wrong. And then there was Derek...
A part of Stiles knew on some level that it would lead to this. Ever since they had met, there had been this tension between them, and Stiles knew that they were both too broken to make it work, that the heat between them would build and build until it burned them alive, ruining any chance of friendship, but he had hoped... As they grew closer and began to trust each other, Stiles found he didn't want to hold back anymore, he wanted to take the risk, because surely just a few months of warmth would be worth the explosion.
It wasn't.
Stiles knew that Derek would hurt him, not physically, he knew Derek would never truely want to hurt him, but Derek was damaged, and Stiles didn't know how to help heal those types of wounds. Stiles knew that trying would just hurt them both, and in the end, Derek Hale would break his heart. But he hadn't cared.
It was after Derek brought Scott to Deaton, while they were waiting together to see if he was going to be okay, Stiles could feel them standing on the edge, waiting to see who was going to take that step.
"If you hadn't trusted me, Scott would be dead" Derek broke the silence, and Stiles didn't look up from where he was starring at his brother, on the brink of death, but still hanging on. He tried to imagine what would have happened if he hadn't trusted Derek, if he had questioned him, even for a minute. Would Scott have survived? Would Melissa have blamed him? How could he have lived with that guilt? And he was grateful, he knew that tension between them, the attraction, the respect, was the reason he'd taken Derek at his word.
"Its unreal to think we've only known each other a few months, it feels like I've known you my whole life. I trust you, Derek Hale" Stiles admitted, turning around to face the Alpha, and Derek was right behind him, their faces inches apart.
"Not everyone in my family was a werewolf, Stiles, humans have an important place in any pack. You bring out the humanity in us, and if your not careful, we'll bring out the beast in you" Derek said, his eyes focused on his nose, as if he couldn't make himself look Stiles in the eyes, or couldn't trust himself not to look at his lips.
"I'm okay with that" Stiles said, leaning forwards at the same time Derek did, and then they were kissing, and Stiles mind went blank.
Kissing Derek wasn't anything like he'd imagined, he'd always thought there'd be more shoving into walls and biting, but Derek was gentle, yet commanding. He wrapped his arms around Stiles hips, pressing thre length of their bodies together, and manipulated his body like a well practiced machine.
"Stiles, your only sixteen" Derek pulled back sharply, his eyes wide, and Stiles actually contemplated biting him in his frustration for a moment.
"Okay, fist of all, I'm seventeen, and a willing contributor in this. Second of all, we were really having a moment, and I don't know about you, but it was very nice, and I'd like to do it again, repeatedly, on various surfaces-" Stiles was cut off when Derek turned and began dragging him out of the vet clinic and over to his car.
"We're not making out beside Scott's unconscious body" Derek smirked, pulling Stiles into the backseat, and suddenly Stiles was lost again. Derek smelt like woodsmoke and mint, like dark chocolate and cinnamon. It was heady and delicious, and when Derek scented his neck, biting human teeth into his neck, Stiles couldn't help but bite Derek back, sinking his teeth into Derek's neck, and feeling his body tremble against his for a moment as the air around them became electrified.
Some time later, Stiles realized Derek was digging his hands into the upholstery in order to keep from ripping Stiles clothes off, and a giddiness swept through him.
"I know I'm human, but your not going to break me" Stiles smirked, sliding a hand up Derek's thigh, and then Derek's hands slid under his ass, and pulled his jeans down, tossing them aside as Stiles yanked his shirt off, leaving Stiles mostly naked in Derek's backseat, and Derek still fully clothed.
"I better not be dreaming" Stiles muttered as he pushed Derek's leather jacket off his shoulders, pressing a kiss to his pulse, and feeling every muscle in Derek's body lock up, before finally relaxing into the kiss.
Stiles lost track of time between the kissing and the touching, and the licking and the biting, not all of while was done by Derek, to the Alpha's amusement. Derek might heal quickly, but that didn't stop Stiles from trying, covering his body in bites, bruises and scratches as Derek slowly drove him insane.
By the time Derek slipped a lubed finger into Stiles, he was already so far gone to the pleasure, and had no intention of ever stopping.
Derek seemed to take extreme joy in driving Stiles crazy, being twice as through when stretching him out than Stiles thought was necessary, and then Derek was sliding into him, sans condom, into Stiles was seated on his lap.
"You need a bigger car" Stiles complained the third time Stiles hit his head on the roof while trying to ride him, and Derek just laughed into his shoulder.
It wasn't elegant or beautiful, they weren't in perfect sync, there was no gentle lovemaking or proflaimation of true love. It was desperate and messy, and it was perfect.
Between Stiles teenage hormones and Derek's werewolf stamina, they kept going round after round until the run rose, and Stiles finally slouched forewords against Derek's chest, sleepy and blissed out.
He must have fallen asleep in Derek's arms, because he woke up in his own bed, dressed in his boxers and t-shirt, smelling like cum and sex and Derek. The collection of bruises and bite marks covering his body reminders of their night together, and Stiles smiled giddily into his pillow for a moment before getting up to grime off.
Stiles didn't know what to expect, and a part of him had even expected this to happen, but that doesn't mean it didn't hurt like a motherfucker all the same. Because for the next two weeks, Derek avoided him, not even a text message, and Stiles didn't know how to go forwards. He knew pushing Derek would have the opposite effect that he wanted, and therefore he was stuck.
So, since he couldn't focus on his Derek issues, he couldn't fix his Dad problems, and he wasn't sure how to address his Scott dilemma, Stiles threw his energy at Deaton.
"So your saying there's nothing else? I created a 20 foot line out of a handful of sand and there's nothing I could do to help?" Stiles complained to Deaton, and Deaton met his eyes steadily.
"Stiles, magic is half raw power and half will power, and while you have plenty of the later, you don't have much of the other. There's nothing else to tell you, you just don't have the capabilities for magic" Deaton repeated, and Stiles frowned disappointedly, and when Deaton wandered off, Stiles tried not to feel too bad about riffling through Deaton's books.
There wasn't too much that interested him, only a few spell books that Stiles didn't know the first thing about using. There were some newer looking texts, but most of them were old and hand written, of varying sizes and thickness. There was only one book that called to him, a leather bound book, about two inches thick, with an old fashioned buckle, which opened easily and revealed thousands of thin pages, the book was divided into sections, spells, potions, rituals and creatures, and on the first page, Stiles found the Hale triskilion, and bellow it were several signatures, the most recent being Philip Hale.
Philip Hale was Derek's human older brother...
It was a no brainer to take the book, it wasn't Deaton's anyway. Stiles didn't know how he had it, but Derek deserved a little piece of his family back, even if it was just a book.
Stiles never ended up giving the book back.
He told himself he just wanted to study it first, and then he'd give it to Derek. Besides, he couldn't actually give it back until Derek stopped avoiding him anyway, so he might as well take a look.
That was when Stiles discovered Deaton had lied.
It only took a couple hours for Stiles to realize he had more than enough capability for magic. At first he started small, levitating a pencil, but slowly he worked his way up to rearranging his bedroom without lifting a muscle, and it escalated from there.
It was all harmless stuff, practically party tricks, he had never tried the more dangerous spells, because he didn't have enough control yet. He was using the little training practices the book talked about to summon and control his raw magic, but he'd never directed that power at anyone.
After his complete uselessness at the station fighting off Matt and the kanima, and being forced to lay beside Derek, the tension between them so thick, and yet being unable to say anything...
It almost hurt as much as when they were able to move, when Matt was dead, and Stiles was at home, his dad finally having gone to bed after reassurance that Stiles was okay, only to find Derek in his bedroom. From the tense set of his shoulders, Stiles knew that this conversation wasn't going to end well.
"Are you okay?" Stiles asked, and Derek didn't reply, only looking at Stiles bed.
"Scott's working with Gerard, and I know he doesn't keep anything from you. Its awfully convenient that we had sex while Scott is spying on my pack" Derek growled, and Stiles was suddenly speechless.
"Scott... No, Scott wouldn't work with Gerard, and if he did... He would have told me" Stiles said, and Derek whipped around his eyes glowing red.
"Don't lie to me. I should have known better, I keep making the same mistakes over and over, and I'm not going to loose another pack over it!" Derek snarled lowly, the sound shaking Stiles awake.
"I'm not lying, just listen to my heartbeat. I don't know anything about Scott and Gerard working together" Stiles declared, and Derek growled lowly.
"It doesn't matter, I should never have... It wont happen again" Derek said bluntly, and Stiles winced, blinking tears out of his eyes.
"Okay, I understand. I got your message loud and clear, so you can leave now" Stiles snapped, turning away from Derek as he walked up behind him.
"This is for the best. Goodbye, Stiles" Derek said, and then he was gone, and Stiles let the tears fall down his cheeks, trying to muffle his cries so Derek wouldn't hear and use it to hurt him further.
It was only when Stiles called Scott, and was sent to voicemail, that he finally realized how alone he was. Scott has just left him half paralyzed in the police station, he was working with Gerard, and now he wasn't there when he called... After everything with Derek, it was a tough pill to swallow.
Stiles had never imagined what his attributes would be. Every magic user was different, they all had things they excelled in, and things they didn't, and every magic had a certain flavor, some more rare than others. Stiles didn't know what he thought his attributes might be, conjuring? Enchantments? Potions?
He didn't expect this.
Gerard pushed him to the ground, and his eyes met Erica's, miserable and afraid, and knew he couldn't let her die, he had to do something, anything... Gerard reached for him as he summoned his magic to him, and then Stiles set a hand against Gerard's heart, and pushed his magic out.
There was a moment of silence, Gerard drew in one shocked gasp, and then his body hit the floor. It looked like one of those nature films, where they show the circle of life from birth to decomposing, only much gorier.
"Oh my god" Stiles gagged on the scent of decomposing flesh, and stumbled to his feet, and unplugged the electrical current moving through Erica and Boyd.
"Stiles, what... what are you?" Erica gasped, and Stiles recoiled from the horror in her tone.
"You should call Derek. He doesn't know how to connect, but nothing matters more to him than Pack. If you talk to him, he'll understand" Stiles stuttered, tossing Boyd his phone, and then Stiles left, leaving them to follow behind him.
Everything happened so quickly. Lydia came to him, and within two hours, Jackson was a werewolf, and happily reunited with Lydia. After nearly being killed several times the last few weeks, everything was over, and things were beginning to settle. Erica and Boyd had returned to Derek, and were reconnecting with him and Issac, apologizing for leaving and promising to stay. Scott and Allison were reconciling in the corner, Scott had finally told her the truth about her mother, and she was crying and apologizing profusely.
And Stiles... Stiles stood on the edges of the battlefield, watching as the Pack swarmed each other around him, and none of them noticed when Stiles turned and left. Stiles returned home, and when he tried to excuse where he'd been to his father, who had finally had enough, everything exploded.
Stiles had lost Scott, Erica and Boyd were afraid of him, his magic was... twisted, and Derek had firmly rejected him. Now his dad had turned on him, and Stiles lost his last shred of control.
"ENOUGH, STILES! Just enough! You think I'm stupid? I know when I'm being lied to, dammit, just tell me the truth! I don't even recognize you anymore! My son would never-" Stiles dad ranted, and Stiles heart shattered.
"Your son?! You didn't seem to think your son was real important when you were drinking your liver to death, and leaving me to practically raise myself after mom died" Stiles snarled, his hands tightened into fists, and John looked at him like he was a stranger.
"We've moved past that-" John began, and Stiles laughed bitterly.
"No, you moved over it. I still have nightmares about you blaming me for my mothers death, I still remember watching her die, I still remember learning how to cook and clean for myself at ten years old because my father was passed out on the floor! No! You do not get to talk about change! I haven't been a normal kid in years, I haven't needed you, and I don't need you now!" Stiles screamed, his heart beat slamming against his ribs, his face flushed with rage, and he knew he couldn't afford to say anything more, but when he move to disappear into his room, his dad grabbed Stiles by the arm, yanking him back.
"You aren't just some kid, your my kid! As long as you live in my house, you follow my rules, and you will respect me! Now I don't care what the hell is wrong with you, but you'd better get over it! If you haven't smartened up by the morning, I'm gonna introduce your ass to a jail cell" John snarled and Stiles shoved his dad off and slammed his bedroom door behind him.
Stiles paced for a few minutes, before falling face first into his bed and indulging in a healthy cry. Stiles wasn't an over emotional guy, he was normally very good at compatinalizing, he could store away his emotions until he could deal with them later, but sometimes he just wanted to let all of it out, and cry until he was numb.
After he was emotionally exhausted, he sat up, pushed the remaining emotions to the side, and settled at his desk, where he began to make a plan.
He couldn't stay here any longer. In the last few months, he'd been almost killed an innumerable amount of times, and most of the time it was by the people on his side. He also wasn't sure what to do about his magic, he needed a real teacher if he wanted to learn how to control it without hurting someone. And if the town or the pack didn't get him killed, Stiles didn't have a lot going for him, he had no friends, no family, and no love life, his life kinda sucked, and if it went on much longer, he might just do himself in. And stiles wasn't at the point where he would ever be okay with that, he was too strong for suicide, he would leave and come back stronger than ever, and make everyone sorry for giving up on him.
He would make Derek sorry he hadn't given Stiles a chance, a small voice in the back of his head said bitterly.
After a few hours of research on his laptop, and three energy drinks later, Stiles made a couple phone calls. He made sure he kept his voice down, and eventually he managed to pull together a makeshift plan. It wasn't his best work, but it was way better than anything Scott would have created, so there was that...
Stiles had a bunch of family from his moms side in New York, after talking to them, he managed to get in contact with his moms parents. Stiles didn't know much about them, only that his mom never talked to them again after dropping out of university, and they were filthy rich. His grandfather was some sort of CEO, and his grandmother a socialite. They agreed to get him some paperwork, he agreed to Sunday dinner. They agreed to a monthly allowance of $1000 and he agreed to at least a bachlour degree. They agreed not to tell his dad, he agreed to stay out of the press until he finished University.
Truthfully, it was mostly to his advantage.
Stiles next phone call was to switch all his money over to a bank in New York, and bar anyone lese from interfering with his account. When his mom died, most of her life insurance went into that account, to help pay for his schooling, plus whatever he and his dad put away. Overall, he had nearly 200 grand in there, most of which he wouldn't touch, and he couldn't use any of it anyway until he turned 18 in a year, but Stiles always had a backup plan.
Stiles called around to different apartments all around New York, selecting one of the cheaper ones, even if he had some extra cash, he didn't want to push his luck. Finally he found one in Bronx, New York, and signed the paperwork online, and arranged for his first and last to go through, along with a hefty tip for getting this all done within a few hours.
After this, he called ahead to book a second class, one way only, ticket to Manhattan, New York, which would leave at 10 AM from Sacramento, and arranged for a car to come pick him up and drive him to the airport. He would have to leave the Jeep behind, there was no way he could take it with.
By this time, it was nearly 5 AM, and the car would be there any moment, so Stiles started packing. He grabbed his two large suitcases, which had actually been his mums, but had been stored in his closet. Stiles only about half his clothes, all of his movies, his books, toiletries, pillow, and photo albums. He wiped his laptop, which he would have to leave behind, and the house phones memory, and couldn't resist taking Derek's leather jacket, which he had forgotten here one day, and smelled exactly like the Alpha... Woodsmoke and mint, dark chocolate and cinnamon... Just a whiff of it took Stiles back to the backseat of the camero, his body wrapped around Derek, his hands exploring where he'd never thought he'd get to touch, and Derek's hands doing plenty of exploring himself.
Stiles had thought then that Derek had enjoyed that night just as much as Stiles had, but he guessed he was wrong... Or maybe he had enjoyed it, he just didn't want everything that came along with it...
Shaking himself out of it, he realized it was almost 6 AM, and the car had arrived. Sneaking out of the house, his dads alarm clock ringing behind him, waking his dad up for his shift, Stiles moved swiftly and silently for the first time in his life, slipping out the door, he put his things in the trunk, and was slipping into the backseat when he seen his bedroom light turn on, and heard his dad swearing when he realized most of Stiles things were gone.
"Get me out of here, and there's a $50 tip in your future" Stiles said quietly, and the driver nodded, half way down the street by the time his dad ran out of the house.
It was nearly 9 AM am, and Stiles was sitting in the airport coffee shop, starring at the pay phone across the room as he slowly drained his third cup of coffee. Stiles waited until 9:45 before walking over to the payphone and debating who to call, when finally he settled on Melissa.
"Hello" the nurse sounded weary and drawn out, which made Stiles bite his lip in guilt.
"I wanted to say goodbye" Stiles whispered, and Melissa's breath caught.
"Stiles? Stiles, is that you?" Melissa asked, and suddenly Stiles could hear arguing in the background.
"I'll hang up if you give the phone to anyone" Stiles warned her, and she relayed the message, making the background go quiet.
"I don't suppose you'll tell me where you are?" Melissa asked, and Stiles wiped a tear from his cheek.
"No. Who's all there? Is it just my dad, or did Scott manage to drag himself away for a moment?" Stiles asked, and Melissa cleared her throat.
"Your dad, Scott, Derek, Erica, Boyd, Isaac, Jackson, Lydia, Allison, her dad, and about five deputies" Melissa said softly, and Stiles sniffled, wiping his tears.
"There's so many things I want to say, but I... I don't know how to word it. Scott chose Allison, Lydia chose Jackson, Derek chose his Pack, my dad chose work, I'm fairly certain Erica and Boyd are disgusted by me, and I barely know Issac... The only one I couldn't just leave hanging was you. You took one look at a spastic five year old clinging to your son, and you welcomed me in. After my mom died, you were there for me, you held me up when my dad broke down. I can't imagine where I'd be without you, and I don't want to. Thank you, Melissa, for making me strong, but I need to be strong on my own now. I'll never forget you. I love you, mom" Stiles said those last four words almost at a whispered, and he could hear Melissa sobbing.
"Stiles, please come home. We can fix this, I promise I will make Scott fix whatever happened between you two. Your like a second son to me, Stiles Stilinski, I don't want to lose you" Melissa cried, and Stiles sniffled.
"You won't lose me, not permanently. I'll be back one day, but if I spend another day in that town, I can't be certain I'll wake up again" Stiles choked out, and Melissa was crying even heavier now.
"Stiles-" Melissa started, and Stiles took a steadying breath and cut her off.
"Goodbye, mom. I love you" Stiles said, stronger this time, and she stiffled a sob.
"I love you, too, Stiles. Please, don't-" Melissa begged, and Stiles forced himself to hang up the phone, bending down, he grabbed his carry on, and left the cafe, heading towards his terminal, where passengers were getting onto the plane.
It was hard to leave everything behind, but this was the only way. He knew himself well enough to know that if he kept contact, he would come back before he was ready to make the people he loved happy. But this time he had to do something for himself, he had to learn to be strong. This was his pathway, and no one else could walk it.
This was the beginning of his journey...