OK. I swear THIS IS ONLY A ONE SHOT! I'm currently obsessed with the song "Brand New" by Ben Rector. As someone staring down the barrel of 40, this song speaks to me. If you haven't heard it, you should. The video is him blowing his money given to him for the video by taking 5 fans to Six Flags over Texas. He's awesome.
watch?v=-SMYzllRyqg
He finished his drink and looked around. A suspension. With a warning about looking further than just this job. Or there would be no job to come back to. His boss wasn't going to let this job take him down as a person. He could respect that.
He needed to get out of this bar, though. He had dispatched the third… child… that had come up to hit on him while he ate his dinner and tried to just think. There was a time when he would have engaged, had a little fun and walked away. But these women made him feel old. And old felt awful. He knew he needed to do something different. Her name jumped right into his head, like it always did when he didn't have his guard up. He glanced at himself in the mirror behind the bar, nodding at his reflection. It was time to try brand new.
"Barba" he heard from behind him. He had just taken out his headphones after completing a long run. It was a beautiful morning in the city and instead of looking at it through a window, he took advantage of it. He watched her move toward him, holding Noah's hand. Gone was Benson and in her place was Liv, in her leggings and long shirt and tennis shoes, hair pulled back, enjoying the morning with her son.
Noah ran up to him and extended his hand, giving him a high five. Normally after a long run, Barba felt tired. Like he could feel his age in that moment. But he bent down and gave Noah a crazy amount of fives and then scooped him up, throwing him over his shoulder, not feeling anything but the joy this little boy exuded just by living.
"So two weeks, huh?" He just nodded. "Liv, I'm sorry. I meant to call you after. I just… went to drown my sorrows I guess."
"How did that work out for you?" He just shrugged and smiled at her in a way he didn't normally allow. "Well, I did make myself a promise to try some out of the box stuff for me with this time off."
She just looked at him. "What does that mean?"
"Not sure."
"Ok then."
He looked at the little boy in his arms. "What are you two up to today?"
She looked around. "Not sure. Just kind of playing it by ear. We have a day completely free of plans."
"Well, I could tag along if Noah doesn't mind a third wheel." She slipped her glasses up her face, searching his for where that had come from. But he wasn't looking at her. He was making faces back and forth with Noah. Like he was a kid too. She wasn't sure she had ever seen him do this before. It was refreshing. It made her feel… something she always beat down when it came to him.
"Well, we are in search of food right now."
"Perfect. I know the best food truck in town. It's across the park." And with that he took off, carrying Noah, talking to him about whatever nonsense flew out of her son's mouth. She had to jog to catch up with them.
He was just going for it today. Why not? He hadn't felt this good… or young… in a very long time. He was relaxed. Not thinking about everything that he could be doing. No point in that. It never got him anywhere or made him feel good about anything. But this day. Tagging along with Olivia and Noah. It made him feel like he was 17 without a care in the world. His only goal was to make them both laugh. Right now, he was sitting on the bench, his phone blaring music as Noah held his mother's hand and danced, not caring about anyone watching him. Neither did Olivia. It made his heart beat a little faster, watching her without a care in the world when it came to that little boy.
A woman slowed as she walked up to the bench. "They are having a ball" she said, smiling at Olivia and Noah. He just nodded, unsure he could put what he was thinking or feeling into words. "This is a beautiful family" she said, giving him a slight nod and walking away before he could even think about correcting her. He watched her walk away and knew he didn't even want to. He wanted to feel like this, with his heart skipping a beat as she threw her head back and laughed at whatever crazy move Noah was trying to accomplish. She held up her hands to him and came to sit next to him. Noah pointed at the phone and he hit repeat on the song and the dance started over.
She slid right next to him so they were touching. He threw his arm across the back of the bench and she leaned in more, resting against his side.
"To be 4 and not care what anyone thinks" she said.
"You care what people think?"
"I used to care a lot more. Now it's just a select few" she replied, looking at him. He gave her a slight wink and rested his hand on her shoulder, deciding maybe what he kept telling himself would be a big mistake would be the best thing ever.
What he thought was going to be a one off during his forced vacation ended up being more when Olivia texted him to let him know that Noah was demanding he go to the zoo with them. It had been a long time since he had been to the zoo and seeing it through a child's eyes was refreshing. It's like the zoo was a brand-new place for him. Noah walked between him and Olivia, holding their hands and jabbering on and on about all the animals. He's not sure he had met someone who could out talk him but Noah was giving him a run for his money. All Olivia could do was laugh and nod along as they tried to out talk each other. He finally gave up. The toddler wins. Then the zoo became dinner at a dive he had never been to but seemed to be a regular spot for the two of them. The waitress just gave him a wink when she delivered their food. It made his heart feel light. Then dinner turned into walking them home, Noah in his arms, half asleep and Olivia wrapping her arm around his free one. And for the first time, in a very long time, he wasn't afraid of what he felt when he was around her and if any one saw the way they were being together.
His two weeks were almost up and he had spent more of his time with them than alone. Lunches. Dinners. There was even a coffee date just the two of them outside the precinct where the entire squad had seen them and didn't even bat an eye at the two of them together. They sat on the bench in the park, watching Noah play with some friends from school a few days before he was to return to work.
"You ready to go back?" she asked. It was the giant purple elephant that had been following them around the last two weeks.
"It will be nice to get back to a routine but…" she looked at him, turning into, resting her hand on his leg. "This has been nice too. More than nice. Thanks for letting me be the third wheel. I might have to do this more often with you two."
"Honestly, we don't do this as much as I like or want. It's been a great change of pace. I'm going to miss it." He pulled her into him, resting his forehead against the side of her face, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.
"What if we try to make this a regular thing then?" he whispered as she leaned into his touch.
"Like regular dates?"
"Yeah. The three of us. The two of us… stuff like that."
"The two of us?"
"Oh. Sorry. I meant me and Noah…" she hit his chest and he grabbed her wrist, pulling it up over his shoulder so they were a breath apart. She looked at his lips and he was lost. For good he thought. Like some high school kid falling in love for the first time. He gently kissed her, thinking he would never forget the feel of her lips on his for the first time and wondering why he had bothered ever kissing anyone else in his life. She pulled back and he rested his free hand on her cheek.
"Not to worry, Liv. I have plans for the two of us. Amazing plans. Exhausting plans. Plans that involve little to no clothing." She gave him a small laugh, but the look in her eyes let him know that she was fully onboard.
"Ice cream!" Noah yelled, running up to them. They turned toward him and Barba held his arm out, pulling the boy up into his lap.
"Ice cream for dinner sounds like the BEST plan."
She just shook her head at them, pulling him up off the bench. "Really? I haven't done that since I was like 17."
"Well then I think it's time to experience that all over again" he replied, looping his arm around her waist and walking them off into the evening.