Disclaimer: I don't own the Tomorrow series, no moola is being made sha'll I add the da? ;p

AN. This is from Robyn's point of view sometime during the third book before Cobblers bay.

Faith

Faith is what I would call it. Ellie would call it and me religious. She doesn't get it, not really. It's not about a higher being, a god or whatever you want to picture in your head. It's faith.

Faith in good, faith in people. I know Ellie doesn't get, that she can't believe in something that is beyond her power. I don't think I could live like that. In a world so black and white. I believe in the gray, thing everything in between. Just because you do one bad thing, one thoughtless action, does that condemn you to hell? Does that mean your evil? If Ellie killed those soldiers with the lawn mower, does that make her a bad person? To me there is nothing evil about Ellie, nothing impure. She lives on the land, she knows sometime it is better to end something then let it drag on. Sometimes it's better to take a life then let it be. Sometimes a swift death comes in the form of a favour.

Pain is much worse then death.

It is something I have been think about a lot lately.

Death.

What would I die for?

I have always thought when it is your time is up, then it's up. I just hope I leave a mark. I hope that when I die it means something. That I don't loose everything for nothing. I want my life to mean something, but so does everyone. I am not sure even Ellie understands what our future is going to be like. The others are in some idealistic world of everything will work out once we get the adults back.

Once the war is over.

I don't know how to tell them I don't think we are all going to make it. I don't think this war will truly ever be over in our life times. It's hard to admit that after what happened with Corrie but I know it's on the back of everyone's mind. I know it's on mine.

Somewhere deep inside I know I am not going to make it to the end of this but I want too. I want to see the day when Ellie realise that she is truly in love, not that fairy tales romance but that hair raising gritty love. The kind that survives fights, deaths and the war itself. I think she wonders if she is only with Lee because of the war.

Because Homer is in love with Fi.

I wish she'd remember she was curious about him before this started, she was already thinking about him before our world fell apart. I know she doesn't think it's going to last but I think it will. I think they clash beautifully together, like night and day. I just hope Lee doesn't give up on her before she wakes up.

It would be nice to fall in love. I wouldn't mind being in Ellie's or even Fi's shoes. Homer is so hopelessly in love with her, I don't know if they will work. They are so different from Lee and Ellie. I could see Ellie and Lee married but Homer and Fi, I don't know. They are so different. It as if they come from different worlds. It's not because Fiona is a rich girl from the hill or because Homer is a ruffian farm boy. It's because Fi doesn't love Homer back. She likes him well enough but I don't think she is going to be the one for him. Homer needs someone to challenge him, to build him up and knock him down. He needs someone stronger then Fi.

I can see him from here, arguing passionately with Kevin. There is a spark in that boy that need a needs wood to burn brightly not dim like it would with Fi. But for now I think they may be enough for each other, a rock to lean on in the darest of nights. Kevin throughs his hands up in defeat, arguing with Homer is a typical lost cause. I can't help but watch as he stomps off moodily. I've been worrying about Kevin lately.

Since Corrie's death he hasn't been quite the same. There is something off about him. Not in the Chris was loosing it before he crashed the car but something in inside him. It was like part of him was dead. He was there but something went with Corrie, something was buried nine feet under.

He was hell bent of revenge, Cobbler's bay was going to be the greatest victory and the biggest defeat. I can't help but think that this is a mistake.

That we were playing fire.

That we were going to burn.