Nataki-Chan's Brainless Tales
Episode 1: Chapter 1
Rating: PG for pants and hints at yaoi-ness
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing yada yada yada
The Emperor's New Pants
Many years ago, there was an emperor of a Chinese colony cluster named Chang Wufei. He was rich and very full of himself. All he cared about was new pants... and justice.
'What shall I wear today?' He would ask. He could never make up his mind. That, to him, was the greatest injustice of all. He had so many pants in his closets that they spilled out into the room. There were pants everywhere! He even had a special room just for his pants, but soon it was not nearly big enough. He would change into a new pair of pants every hour on the hour 24/7/365... yes, even holidays. If he went out into the streets, he put on very special, shiny pants. He wanted all of China to admire his natural beauty and his beautiful pants. All day, he would gaze into his own eyes in the mirror and remark on how much better he looked than an onna. Can you see such a weird guy?
One day, two unfamiliar personages came to the city; one was French and the other was Saudi Arabian. It was not long before they heard of the emperor and his love of new pants-
'And JUSTICE!' exclaimed Wufei.
Dammit! I was getting to that before I was so rudely interrupted... and justice. They were sly and made a plan. They would get rich off the Emperor. They went to visit him in his pants-filled palace. At this particular time, he wore some lovely black pants with gold trim.
'Your majesty,' they both said, bowing. 'You are the most style-conscious king we have ever seen, and we have traveled all over the place. There is no better dressed king in the whole universe, except...' They stopped and looked at each other.
'Tell me now! Who has more stylish pants than I?' Cried Wufei.
'Oh, a king in a far off colony...*cough* L1 *cough*
'I should have known! That damned Heero Yuy and his Queen Duo who I don't really think is a woman...arrgh.... Damn! Curse the spandex!'
'But! If we made you some new pants, you would be even more fashionable than he!' And they bowed and smiled at each other. The king would never resist an offer like that! They would get rich quick! It was so easy.
The emperor was quite happy. (But not like THAT) "But I have the most bling blingin' pants in the world! Have you ever seen pants of a more bling bling quality? And he danced about gaily (but not like THAT) in front of the mirror, showing his pants off.
'Oh yes! Your pants are very stylish,' they told him 'but if we made you a NEW pair of pants, they would be the best pants ever made. They would be magical pants!'
'Tell me more!' commanded his majesty 'How can pants be magical? How could you create magical pants? How do you know how to sew?'
Quatre began to giggle 'That is a very very very confidential secret that you or anyone other than me and my...uh...uh... associate shall know.
'But I must know!'
'You don't want to know.' (No, I am not implying anything!!)
The emperor paced about, almost tripping over a few piles of pants. 'Hmm... magical pants...It sounds too good to be true... I MUST HAVE THESE SO-CALLED MAGICAL PANTS!'
'It will be very expensive!' Warned the two...uh... associates. 'We will need two billion dollars to buy the material and it will be an extra 50,000 dollars for our...services. (But NOT LIKE THAT!)
His Majesty, WuFei, did not care! He had to have those pants! NOW! So, he gave them their money and they skipped gaily away to the sewing room (BUT NOT LIKE THAT...well, maybe like that... not that there's anything wrong with things like that, of course... I mean I'm not one to judge.)
Don't cry!!
To be continued when I have time!
Episode 1: Chapter 1
Rating: PG for pants and hints at yaoi-ness
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing yada yada yada
The Emperor's New Pants
Many years ago, there was an emperor of a Chinese colony cluster named Chang Wufei. He was rich and very full of himself. All he cared about was new pants... and justice.
'What shall I wear today?' He would ask. He could never make up his mind. That, to him, was the greatest injustice of all. He had so many pants in his closets that they spilled out into the room. There were pants everywhere! He even had a special room just for his pants, but soon it was not nearly big enough. He would change into a new pair of pants every hour on the hour 24/7/365... yes, even holidays. If he went out into the streets, he put on very special, shiny pants. He wanted all of China to admire his natural beauty and his beautiful pants. All day, he would gaze into his own eyes in the mirror and remark on how much better he looked than an onna. Can you see such a weird guy?
One day, two unfamiliar personages came to the city; one was French and the other was Saudi Arabian. It was not long before they heard of the emperor and his love of new pants-
'And JUSTICE!' exclaimed Wufei.
Dammit! I was getting to that before I was so rudely interrupted... and justice. They were sly and made a plan. They would get rich off the Emperor. They went to visit him in his pants-filled palace. At this particular time, he wore some lovely black pants with gold trim.
'Your majesty,' they both said, bowing. 'You are the most style-conscious king we have ever seen, and we have traveled all over the place. There is no better dressed king in the whole universe, except...' They stopped and looked at each other.
'Tell me now! Who has more stylish pants than I?' Cried Wufei.
'Oh, a king in a far off colony...*cough* L1 *cough*
'I should have known! That damned Heero Yuy and his Queen Duo who I don't really think is a woman...arrgh.... Damn! Curse the spandex!'
'But! If we made you some new pants, you would be even more fashionable than he!' And they bowed and smiled at each other. The king would never resist an offer like that! They would get rich quick! It was so easy.
The emperor was quite happy. (But not like THAT) "But I have the most bling blingin' pants in the world! Have you ever seen pants of a more bling bling quality? And he danced about gaily (but not like THAT) in front of the mirror, showing his pants off.
'Oh yes! Your pants are very stylish,' they told him 'but if we made you a NEW pair of pants, they would be the best pants ever made. They would be magical pants!'
'Tell me more!' commanded his majesty 'How can pants be magical? How could you create magical pants? How do you know how to sew?'
Quatre began to giggle 'That is a very very very confidential secret that you or anyone other than me and my...uh...uh... associate shall know.
'But I must know!'
'You don't want to know.' (No, I am not implying anything!!)
The emperor paced about, almost tripping over a few piles of pants. 'Hmm... magical pants...It sounds too good to be true... I MUST HAVE THESE SO-CALLED MAGICAL PANTS!'
'It will be very expensive!' Warned the two...uh... associates. 'We will need two billion dollars to buy the material and it will be an extra 50,000 dollars for our...services. (But NOT LIKE THAT!)
His Majesty, WuFei, did not care! He had to have those pants! NOW! So, he gave them their money and they skipped gaily away to the sewing room (BUT NOT LIKE THAT...well, maybe like that... not that there's anything wrong with things like that, of course... I mean I'm not one to judge.)
Don't cry!!
To be continued when I have time!