So. Anywho. These are some random adventures of Jamie and Ranger, all of them before Ranger meets Stephanie. I know you all like the Jamie and Ranger stories...so here they are. I'll add more when I think of more. Enjoy.

Christmas With Ranger

My first Christmas away from home. Well, Christmas Eve, anyway. I was walking along in the snow of jolly ol' London. I walked past shops and bakeries and cafes, thinking about life in general. I was considering buying stuff for my family and shipping them over to Trenton, but decided against it considering I had no money. I sighed and slid through the crowd of last minute shoppers. I didn't have anywhere to stay that night, which officially sucked.

I smiled as I recounted the last couple of weeks. I had been with a guy I met about a month ago, Ricardo Carlos Manoso, AKA Ranger. And of course, all of his Merry Men. We had met up in Italy, and I helped him with another take-down of some scumbag. Then we kinda hung out for a while, and one day Ranger got a call from someplace, and off he went, riding into the sunset with his numerous Tontos. I hadn't asked to come with him, because first of all he had said no ahead of time, and I wasn't done seeing Europe yet.

I turned the corner onto 66 Fleet Street. I spotted an old, smallish red building. There was a gold title above the door that read "The Tipperary". It looked like a decent place to take a rest, and it was only 6 o'clock so it was still open. I pushed the door aside and headed straight for the bar. It was a small, dark, smokey room. Men were piled around the bar, and generally piled everywhere. I sauntered right up to the bar and ordered a Tullamore Dew. The barkeep didn't even ask for my ID. That was a bonus. I slid onto a bar stool and sipped from my big glass mug, feeling the warm whiskey wash down my throat. Yum.

Suddenly there was an arm around my waist and a kiss planted onto the top of my head. A warm voice breathed into my ear. "Merry Christmas," Ranger said.

I smiled. "Not yet, Santa."

Ranger slid into a stool next to me and ordered a drink. "Having a lonely Christmas?" he asked me.

I sighed. "Yeah, my first away from home. I didn't think it'd be this hard." And that was the truth. It sucked being alone in a strange place on a holiday. I could be at home right now, sitting in front of the fire, watching Mom and Grandma Mazur decorate the tree or Dad disappearing into the garage to get away from Grandma Mazur.

"Homesick?" Ranger interrupted my thoughts.

I smiled sheepishly. "A little."

We sat in silence for a while. Ranger stood up after a bit and dropped some Euros on the bar. He slid an arm around my shoulders and steered me out into the snow. "Tank and I are here for a job. We're renting a house up the street. You can stay with us."

I was mentally jumping for joy. No more spending nights on the Underground.
"Aww…you don't have to put up with a homeless whiny teenager like me."

Ranger arm was still around my shoulders and we were walking down the street like that. He smiled down at me. "I don't think I could have survived that puppy-eyes look you were giving me. And besides, you'd probably follow me home anyway."

That was true. "Hey! I wasn't giving you puppy eyes!"

Ranger grinned. "Sure you were, just unconsciously."

I cut my eyes to him. "Hmmph. You just want an excuse to be nice."

"Well, there's that, too."

Ranger unlocked the door to his little house and we went inside. I kicked off my wet boots and shrugged out of my wet jacket. Ranger told me I could change into a pair of his sweats, and that's exactly what I did.

I came into the kitchen, dressed in warm black sweatpants and found Ranger and Tank lounging around, leaning against the counter. Tank was stirring a pot on the stove and a pan sizzling next to it. The room smelled absolutely scrumptious.

"What's cookin' good lookin'?" I asked Tank.

He smiled at me. "Spaghetti and meatballs. The perfect Christmas Eve dinner."

"Wow. This'll probably be the first time I haven't had roast beef of Christmas. I'm afraid I'll get struck down by the Burg Gods."

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "The Burg Gods?"

I laughed out loud. "The Burg is the place where I grew up. It's short for Chambersburg. It's a place where houses are obsessively neat and if you aren't home on time, dinner is ruined."

Ranger smiled. "Sounds like a fun place."

I snorted. "Yeah. Allota' fun. Especially when everyone is Italian and the only conversation is yelling over who took the most gravy. It's the perfect place to spread gossip and find out the juciest details. Seriously, there was this girl I hated so I told one of my friends that she was caught making out with the gym teacher. The news was all over the Burg by lunchtime."

Ranger and Tank laughed out loud. I continued. "And ya know, it would be the perfect place for a safe house 'cause nothing bad ever happens in the Burg." I thought for a minute."Well, Jimmy Curtains did walk Two Toes Garibaldi out of his house in his pajamas at one in the morning and drove him to the land fill…but the actual killing didn't happen in the Burg."

Ranger shook his head and smiled. "I'll think about it," he said.

Over spaghetti and meatballs I told Ranger and Tank about my family. I was feeling too homesick not to talk about them, and Ranger and Tank were getting pretty entertained by it. I had told them all about my mother and her neurotic ironing, my father and his cab and secret cigars, and Grandma Mazur. They enjoyed Grandma Mazur. Now I was on to my siblings.

"So, the middle sister is Stephanie. She's a riot. Always wanted to be Wonder Woman, or Peter Pan, or the Thundercats. She's really stubborn and just got divorced 'cause her ass of a husband cheated on her. And boy, was it a nasty divorce. I wasn't there, but apparently her head spun completely around like the kid in the Exorcist."

This earned me a big laugh, so I went on. "When she was seven she jumped off the roof to see if she could fly. I hadn't been born then, but when I heard the story whenIwasseven, I climbed out of the bathroom window and jumped off myself, just to see how fun it was. Stephanie always used the bathroom window to sneak out at night, and I always had to cover for her. If I didn't, I'd get pinned to the ground and have loogies dangling inches from my face."

More laughs. "But when I was seven, and she was sixteen, one day she came home all upset and I didn't know why, so I bugged her until she told me. All she said was 'fucking Morelli and his connolis'. Of course I had no idea what she meant, and three years later she ran over this Morelli person with a car. I was ten at this point, and badgered her about it but she said I was too young to understand. It was only when I fourteen and was ditching school when I found the poem on the stadium wall, and I knew exactly what Joseph Morelli did to my sister. So after that Joe became my prime target from sniping off the roof.

"But that's enough from Stephanie," I said, sipping my wine, "My oldest sister is Valerie. She's Miss Perfect. She would drag me into her room with her friends so they could all dress me up in little dresses. Gag me with a spoon. They put makeup on me and made me have tea-parties." I shuddered. That's all I said about Valerie. I added that she was happily married with a kid and another on the way.

The conversation drifted toTank's family of three sisters and nofather, and Ranger's of four sisters, a brother, parents, and grandparents all living in the same house. They both told stories about being in the Army, in bootcamps, in military school, and by the time we were finished eating we had moved into the big lounge. I was sitting back against the armrest of a big cushy leather couch with my legs resting on Ranger's lap. Tank was stretched out on a couch across from us. All three of us had hot chocolate in our hands. Mine had marshmallows.

"That was yummy," I said, sipping my hot chocolate.

"Mmmm…" Tank said from the couch.

We sat in silence for a while. The only sound was the crackling of the fire. I had the sudden urge to snuggle up to Ranger and relax, but that would have been weird. So I stayed where I was, wiggling my toes and sipping hot chocolate.

After a while Ranger suggested we turn in for the night. Ranger and Tank had a big meeting tomorrow morning, and they didn't want to embarrass themselves by falling asleep. So Ranger brought me a huge blanket and pillow, and he and Tank retreated upstairs.

Two hours ticked by and I couldn't sleep. I hated sleeping alone on Christmas. Every Christmas I'd climb into Stephanie's bed, but once she left home I'd sleep with my parents. This was my first Christmas ever sleeping alone. And boy, was it lonely. Halfway through the night I got so lonely I shoved the blanket off me and climbed the stairs. I peeked into a bedroom and saw Ranger sprawled out on the bed, sound asleep. I stood in the doorway, wondering what I should do now, when Ranger's eyes opened and he sat up a little to look at me.

"Can't sleep?" He asked, rubbing his eyes.

"I never sleep alone on Christmas," I whispered. And then I walked across the room to the bed and slid beneath the covers. I turned with my back to Ranger and I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

The next morning I woke up and my head was resting on Ranger's bare chest. His arm was around me. I half sat up and looked at Ranger, who was awake.

"Merry Christmas," I said, smiling at him.

He squeezed my shoulder and smiled back. "Merry Christmas."

I laid my head back on his chest and closed my eyes. Who needs presents when you've got a hot Cuban guy to wake up to?

The end.