Wouldn't Dream Of It
Pairing: SellieRating: TSummary: "I don't think I could leave you, no matter how much I need to work out my problems. I think I can handle them. And I'm positive that you would be there for me. I should have seen it before. I'm sorry."
Ellie's POV
I waited in silence with Jay and Emma. Why was Emma here anyways? But I was leaning against Jay's car, watching the opening of the fence where Sean had disappeared to talk to his parents. I could barely stand still. I snapped a rubber band against my wrist, allowing the pain to radiate up my arm and stop the need to cut. I wanted everything to be ok. I wanted Sean to be happy again. I wanted him to be able to come back and talk to me. My mind was reeling and I couldn't keep it on a straight train of thought. It was killing me… I could barely handle it. I almost didn't. I continued to stare and waited silently, hoping the other two would do the same, although, I heard their whispers behind me. It took all my willpower not to yell at them for not having any respect. But I kept my opinions to myself, as I usually did.
Sean's POV
My mind was reeling. I couldn't quite think straight. Last thing I knew, I was crying in my mother's arms, something I hadn't done since I had been a baby. I hated feeling weak. Feeling as though I needed this. And then I thought about it. Did I really need this? Did I really need them, was the real question. I had a great girl outside these gates, one who had given up everything, defied her mom, moved out, and was one of the only people who weren't scared of me. How could I possibly leave her behind for just this…? My parents could help, but they're not the ones I really need. They kicked me out once, who says they won't do it again? I have a girl out there who would do anything for me. Who I think loves me. Just the way she touches me says almost all of it. Her slightest touch tells me all I need to know. Her kiss portrays everything to me. And that's when I realize, I may have needed to get away from Degrassi for a few days, but if I left the apartment, I don't think I could do it. I don't need to. I looked up at my parents for a second, my sobbing ceased.
Ellie's POV
I saw the arm of his sweatshirt first as he walked out of the opening. I stood up straight, waiting for him to speak. I felt as though I knew what he would say. I could picture the conversation in my head. When I saw his face, it looked as though he had been crying, which was surprising. I'd never even heard of him crying. He walked up to me, his face looking serious. I could picture him saying it. I was ready for him to say it, but I didn't want him to. I was just inches away from him, his face so clear to me. Tears were already starting to form in my eyes. "But I love you," I said, before he even said anything. Sean grabbed my wrists gently, bringing one up to his lips and kissing it gently.
"Do you really think I'd leave you?I may have some problems, but I know now that you can help me better than they ever could. I didn't need to come up here, to be honest. They only thing it's done for me is opened my eyes to the fact that I don't need them as much as I need you. I don't think I could leave you, no matter how much I need to work out my problems. I think I can handle them. And I'm positive that you would be there for me. I should have seen it before. I'm sorry," Sean told me. The tears sprang forward, but not out of sadness. I broke free of his gentle grasp of my wrists and wrapped my arms around his neck. By now, I could feel both Jay's and Emma's eyes on my back. Emma was staring holes through the back of my head, I could tell. But Sean was the only one I really cared about. His arms wrapped themselves protectively around my waist. "I'll always be here for you. I won't ever leave you, I promise," he whispered in my ear.
I couldn't help but squeeze him tighter. "I love you," I whispered again. I couldn't help the urge to tell him over and over again.
"Let's get out of here," Sean said, pulling away from me slightly, but keeping an arm securely around my waist. "Jay, you ready?" he asked. Jay nodded. Sean smiled and climbed into the back of the car with me, holding me close the whole way down, stealing kisses while Emma wasn't paying attention.
I fumbled with the door as we headed into the apartment, seeing as how I was stumbling backwards as Sean kissed me passionately and slightly rough, but surprisingly gently. I finally got the door open, which fell from behind me and I backed up, turning slightly and ending up with my back against the nearest wall, which ended up with a slight turn. Sean pushed the door closed behind us, still kissing me and quickly returning his hands to my hips. "Sean…" I said against his lips. I had to stop this. It was going someplace we didn't need it to go. I could tell he was still upset about the shooting and that after the crying, he needed to feel strong again. I didn't want this to be the first thing that made that so. This wasn't what I wanted the reasoning behind our first time was. I pulled my head back slightly. "Sean, you know you don't want this for the right reasons. Please… I want to wait," I said with a twinge of regret in my voice.
Sean stepped a half step back. "I know… I'm sorry, I know. I'm pushing, aren't I. I know what you mean, El. I just… I don't know how else to deal right now," he said, running a hand through his hair.
"Hey, just because I don't want to have sex right now doesn't mean we can't talk. And it definitely doesn't mean you can't kiss me," I said, smiling at him. "I'm here for you, whenever you need me." Sean smiled, leaning in to kiss me again.
"Come on, I think there's actually a good movie on TV tonight," he said. He led me to the couch, sitting down and pulling me down with him. I sat down close to him, tucking my body close into his. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer to him still. "El, I love you," he said, kissing the top of my red hair.
I smiled, feeling safe again. "I love you, too, Sean," I replied, the love seeping from my voice.
Sean's POV
I knew I'd eventually have to go back to school. After taking three serious mental health days, I headed back through the doors of Degrassi, the girl I love standing next to me, her fingers laced with mine, her red hair shining as it always did in Degrassi's bright lights, her mini skirt looking especially cute today. My return was bittersweet. I had missed some of my friends, but then again, I also was dealing with the aftermath of a shooting. But I knew that as long as Ellie was standing with me, I'd be able to make it through anything. Without her, I'd be back home in Wasaga right now. And I'd be lonelier than I'd ever been in my life.
I walked into shop, as I had before I headed of to Wasaga. Although I could have finished auto shop last semester, I decided to take another version of the class this semester. Mr. Ehl was glad to see me back, and was also very happy to know that I was living off welfare very well. I was glad that he was so willing to help me. It felt good having someone like a parent watching over you. Only, a parent who wouldn't give up on you as easily as my actual parents had.
I had started working in the garage that stood just outside Degrassi's auto shop. Mr. Ehl had let me start a full out project that, if I got completely done by the end of the semester, I'd get full marks. I had to finish a whole car. He was great. He always believed in me. I knew the car wasn't a part of his usual curriculum, but after I had told him about my desire to start a shop, he had given the option. I was glad to do it, I wanted to be able to build up a car from just parts. And Ellie had a habit of visiting me in the shop every morning. Well, more like coming to my auto shop first before going off to her class, then seeing me the period after in English. I had finally gotten out of Emma's class for English. I couldn't have been happier. She wanted to burn me, consider me burned. Ellie is my one and only. I don't even know how I ever really loved Emma, not to be mean. She just tried to change me into the perfect boyfriend, and I just couldn't do it. Ellie was the girl who loved someone for who they were, and how I loved it so much. As I started working on the car, Ellie went to leave the shop, but not before wedging herself between me and the framework of the car. "Hey, I don't leave until I get a kiss. You know that," Ellie said, when she seemed to think I had forgotten.
"Come here," I said, grabbing one of her arms with slight force, then pulling her towards me to kiss her as I always did before she left, but this time it held such love that I would be surprised if she didn't notice. "I love you," I whispered as we pulled away. Ellie smiled, returning those three words. Then she headed out of the shop with a quick wave and ran off to her class, as she usually did. I stared after her for a moment. To be honest, I was probably looking at her ass, but nobody else would know the difference. I loved her beyond all belief. It wasn't my fault I fell in love with a hot girl.
Ellie's POV
As always, Sean and I were sitting in the back of the English classroom, the period after his shop class. This had become routine for the two of us. The very back of the English class, Ashley taking notes near the front. As much as she had said that she disapproved of our lack of attention to the teacher at the front of the room, she still let Sean and I borrow her notes whenever we needed to. She was the best friend I could ask for. While she took notes along with the rest of the class, Sean and I silently flirted in the back row. I was so thankful for the fact that they weren't individual desks and that there were at least two people to each desk. Naturally, Sean and I shared one, so whenever the teacher was giving a lecture or whatever it was she was actually doing, not that I knew half the time, one of Sean's hands always seemed to be touching me. Not in a very dirty way or anything, just in a "You're always going to have me" kind of way. A hand always found my knee, possibly my hip or waist. It was comforting, knowing he was right there. His touches seemed to radiate love. Just the way he moved his hands, the way his fingertips would gently brush my arms, whether on purpose or accidentally, who knew, other than Sean, that is.
I loved the way he always made sure he was doing something to let me know that he would never leave me. I couldn't help but swoon whenever he looked at me. I couldn't help the chills that his touch gave me. It was sweet. It was definitely something I'd never had before. It was love. I was in love. Totally and irrevocably. And I couldn't be happier.
So, that's yet another story for Sean x Ellie. I've just been so inspired by this couple lately. I love their chemistry and I just love how they act with each other. So, this is yet another story for Sellie fans. I have started taking requests for stories, so feel free to send me a message with requests. My favorite pairings for Degrassi are listed on my profile along with other series' that I write for. Feel free to send me your requests, I will do my best to write them for you. Thank you. R&R if you would. This may not be a oneshot if I get a new idea, but I'm not sure yet. And I know this closing is very long and I'm sorry. Thank you.