83 Ways to get Killed by Deidara
(sidetrack for Im HIS Daughter?!?!?!?)

Dedicated to xTayuya and li-chan, who have repeatedly asked me for this. Thanks guys (or not read and decide for yourself)

WARNINGS:
#1: Remember kids, DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME!
#2: Only do this when your name is Hebitsuki, youre an Akatsuki member, and you can actually beat Deidara
#3: Dont try to copy/steal this, or ILL FEAKING TORTURE YOU WITH A DUCK AND A CATAPULT UNTIL YOU ACTUALLY WISH YOU HAD SNIFFED MY SPORT SOCKS ehm - A RECENTLY DETONATED POISONOUS BOMB!
#4: If you want me to write one for you, all you have to do is ask...

83 Ways to get killed by Deidara

1. Put a bra on his bed (make it pink and frilly) when hes sitting in the kitchen with the other Akatsuki members
2. Walk over to the kitchen and call him a girl
3. When he protests, cock an eyebrow at him, walk to his room and open the door to reveal a pink, frilly bra on his bed.
4. Take pictures of this
5. Take it back to the kitchen and show it to the others, as well as the pictures
6. When he runs after you and tells you that it isnt his and that he isnt a girl, ask what the hell the bra is for then.
7. Make sure everyone hears this
8. Write Ultra-pervert on his forehead with waterproof felt tip pen
9. Feed the mouths in his hands Toffees when hes asleep
10. When he wakes up, finds out that he cant open them and comes running to you, asks if hes either A: been sniffing glue, or B: has accidentally switched his Decaf coffee with Itachis espresso again
11. But for the record: Blame Tobi anyway
12. Enjoy the show
13. And while youre at it, tape it as well
14. Tend to Tobis wounds
15. Then proceed to announcing to the entire Akatsuki that Deidara and toby have Finally become friends, and maybe even a little more insert suggestive wink here
16. Then SUBTLY tell that Deidaras into SM
17. Call Tobi in
18. Control your laughter and make sure you caught all of that (including the othersfaces) on tape
19. Show it to Deidara
20. Run
21. While running, explain that it was Hidan who brought it up, not you
22. Pray for Hidans soul.
23. After taking care of Hidans wounds as well, subtly mention that Deidara still wets his bed every so-often
24. Then jump, and Tell him to ASOLUTELY tell NO ONE about this
25. Somehow feed Kisame a sleeping pill
26. The next morning, when all of the Akatsuki (except for Kisame) is discussing Deidaras little problem, wake him up and kick him into the kitchen
27. While everyone is eyeing Deidara suspiciously, sneak into his room, throw water over his covers and hang them outside, so they can be seen from the kitchen window.
28. For an even better effect: write his name on them, Paint Narutos face on them, and attach an I LOVE SASORI tag to them
29. Re-enter the kitchen and yell HEY LOOK, NARUTO! While pointing at the window
30. Videotape the reactions of the others
31. When he glares around and asks who did that, innocently notice that Kisames not there
32. That evening, while Deidara and Ssori discuss art over Deidaras homemade sushi, Interrupt them and announce that you agree with Sasori upon the theory that art is, infact, something eternal
33. Do said thing while absentmindedly drawing a perfect circle (which is the sign of eternity)
34. Steal his clay
35. Blow up his bed with it (most preferably while hes in it)
36. Place a barrier over his room and refuse to remove it until he gives you a cookie
37. When he gets you one, yell Oh, so thats the way things are goiung to be, huh?
38. Start to cry and storm off, alerting all the others with this
39. Make sure to collect the tapes from your hidden cameras that recorded Deidaras big beating up by the rest
40. Re-style his hair so it looks just like narutos
41. ACCIDENTALLY flush the toilet when hes showering
42. Do said thing 33 times in a row
43. When he comes running to you angrily, Scream, cover your eyes and start to sob that you are not ready for this.
44. When he tries to be nice, walk away and act offended
45. Kill his teddy bear
46. sign him up for Girls , COSMOgirl , and Shoujo magazine .
47. For the record: Itachi did it
48. Comfort Deidara, cuz Itachi beat him up when he came running at him angrily
49. Get him to a shrink
50. Threaten said shrink so he only answers all that Deidara says with but how does that feel for YOU? (example: Deidara: IM GOING TO FREAKING KILL YOU!!! Shrink: but how does that feel for you?
51. Bury the shrinks remains somewhere nice and quiet
52. Paint Deidaras room pink
53. add some Barbie wallpaper
54. call him and Barbie otaku
55. when he asks why, point at his hair and say : Youre even trying to LOOK like her
56. Show the others his room
57. Tape the following scene.
58. apply ointment to your bruises
59. put tampons in his toilet (classical stunt)
60. hold a sleepover in his (still very pink) room with everyone but him
61. Hold a contest on grapejuice drinking
62. Have fun
63. Tape it all
64. Put glue all over his bed while he is asleep (and the others are too)
65. Do the same to Hidans body
66. put Hidan on his stomach next to Deidaras bed
67. Scream EW, YOU PERVS! NOT HERE! and make a sound as if someone falls off of a bed
68. Control your laughter for a moment to push the camera button and tape the reactions of the others
69. Now RUN
70. When you come out of hiding two hours later, poison his food with laughing poison
71. Ask why hes so happy
72. show him THIS ( Amv.
73. Show it to the rest of the Akatsuki as well, and say Deidara made it
74. Watch the play The death of deidara ( performed by The akatsuki ) and videotape it
75. Do the team rocket dance
76. squeel in his ear
77. smile at him everytime you see him
78. sneak scorpions into his bed at night
79. watch him run and tape it
80. put him Sasori next to him in his bed asleep
81. Wake them up by screaming RAPE!!!!
82. Censure this part out of your video tape (too violent...)
83. Tell Deidara itll all be allright

Well, thats it for now, sorry it was shorter than usual, but (as Deidara-chan usually says) Art is supposed to be a Blast, hn!

Owari! Please comment me, and if you want one made of a character from naruto or another show (as long as I know it, ask me, I know a lot) .Just message me, and Il try to do it for ya
Ways to get Killed by Deidara
(sidetrack for Im HIS Daughter?!?!?!?)

Dedicated to xTayuya and li-chan, who have repeatedly asked me for this. Thanks guys (or not read and decide for yourself)