AN: Inspired by Blue October's 'Calling You'. It's, surprise, surprise, my suggested listening for this, too.
Thank you for reading, I appreciate it! Hope you'll like it. ^^
Beta read by Bagpipes5K2
Calling You to See
I - Calling you to see
The pesky melody kept going. Despite his best efforts - like burying himself under the blankets, trying to ignore it altogether, even stuffing the pillow into his ears - the upbeat tune power-drilled its way through, and finally, with a groan of annoyance, Prompto resurfaced from under the beddings, and reached out to grab the phone.
One half-cracked eye peered through the darkness, to read the caller ID on the too-bright screen.
Ignis.
"Hnnyeellow?"
There was heavy breathing.
"Prompto…"
The electric current that ran through the blond, head to toe, jolted him into full wakefulness. "Ignis?! Iggy, you ok?"
The breaths on the other end of the line became shaky, as if the other was trying to say something.
"Iggy…it's happening again, isn't it?"
"Prompto, I...I can't…" The voice sounded borderline hyperventilating. The blond let out a lost sigh.
"Iggy?"
For a while, all he heard were the breaths. Then: "I, I can't...Prompto I can't hold the knife, I can't read! I can't do anything, I'm, I'm useless...!"
The blond's shoulders dropped, along with his chin. Ignis had been having these...moments. Since the Zegnautus Keep. Maybe, the blond thought, maybe with Noct still being around, Ignis had kept himself in check with sheer willpower. Had pushed his injury aside, told them all how it was insignificant to the grander scheme.
He had never said it was insignificant to himself.
Maybe now that Noct was gone, Ignis finally allowed himself to grieve.
"Help me. Please."
"Alright, alright, look...it's okay, Iggy. Just, breathe," the blond dragged a hand through his hair until it settled to the back of his neck, tugging lightly. "In, out, in, out." It took a while, but eventually the breaths on the other end of the line fell closer to his soft rhythm. "That's it, babe...I'm right here, just keep breathing."
Pant.
Pant.
Pant.
"Thank you."
Prompto let out a mirthless chuckle. "Don't mention it."
"I mean it."
"I know you do."
"...Tell me what it's like."
Not needing the other to elaborate, Prompto simply grunted an agreeing 'um', nodding into the darkness. Then, now fully awake, he got out of the bed and went to the window. Leaning against the frame, he looked out to the sky, Ignis's heavy pants in his ear constantly. "It's...starry. And the sky is pretty clear. Looks blue rather than black, really. The moon is up, almost half and growing. There's this awesome dust cloud across the sky. Kinda like the one we saw that one night when we were camping out at Vesperpool." Prompto's own throat tightened at the memories - now so distant, almost like another life - but he tried not to let his voice shake. Ignis needed this. Needed Prompto to be his eyes.
When Ignis had collapsed...Prompto couldn't tell what had driven him to do it, but as the man had laid before him, on his knees and coming apart at seams - Ignis! - Prompto had started describing him things. Visible things. Things that Ignis had lost forever. Sitting there, holding the unraveling man to his chest and brushing the disheveled dirty blond locks...Prompto had started to tell in a quiet voice what the wallpaper in the room looked like; what the weather was like; what sorts of plants grew out there and if Ignis knew if any of them were edible; how Prompto wished that Ignis could see how beautiful he was…!
And with a few hiccupy pants, wet and interrupted, Ignis' sobs had quieted down into sniffles and shallow pants. And Prompto had told him what the sky looked like; and what the antique clock on the wall looked like; and how nice the fresh flowers looked in the hand painted vase on the bookshelf; and how Ignis should never feel ashamed for he was perfect and-
He hadn't made it further. Water still running down his cheeks, Ignis had kissed him. Longing and desperate, he had drank him up, and Prompto had kissed him back and he had pulled the man close and hadn't let go even when Ignis had eventually broken the kiss, panting lightly against his neck. Prompto had kissed the dirty blond locks and whispered kind words in a quiet voice. And Ignis's fingers had clenched the fabric of his shirt into small balls as the tears had come, not desolate, just running, and Prompto had held him close. Had held him close until Ignis had stopped shaking.
So that was why now...although it was just the small things, the mundane things, although Ignis could no longer see them, he could always remember them. And thus, in a way, as Prompto talked to him about the nature, the clothes he was wearing, the colors and the shapes and the way the wind carried leaves around in small, circling motions - Ignis could still visualize it all in his mind. Could see without seeing. It wasn't the same, would never be the same...but it brought the man some comfort. He clung onto the gunner's - his companion's, his lover's - voice, drowned himself into it as Prompto kept talking in a low voice. And eventually, the breaths in the phone calmed down until Prompto could no longer hear them.
. . .
II - Asking if you love me (I love the way you make it sound)
The other end of the line had fallen silent.
"Ignis?"
Still nothing but a faint sound of lips moving.
"I apologize. Did I wake you?"
"Nah. It's nothin'."
Ignis laughed quietly, a sound void of happiness or merriment. "Despite any punishment," he started, and it sounded like the man had spoken through grit teeth, "-that the Astrals saw to bestow upon me-" It is interrupted by the sharp intake of breath. For a moment, there's nothing but the adviser's pants again.
"Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?" It was strained, pained. Prompto swallowed; Ignis hadn't meant the waking him up part anymore.
"Iggs..? What's that supposed to-?"
"I...I'm afraid I cannot offer you what you'd deserve, Prompto. ...I'm not even a whole man like this..."
"Stop it," there's a note or solemnity in the blond's voice. "I love you just like this, Iggs. I'd never ask for anything else. We'll, we'll make it through this, I promise."
There was a shaky intake.
"Could you...please say that again?"
"It's gonna be fine."
"The...other thing?"
A smile graced Prompto's lips, and his eyes slid closed. "I love you." In his ears Ignis's elated huff, one of utter relief and enamourment. And Prompto poured all his love, all his compassion, into that one confession, made sure that the other would hear his smile: "I love you so much, Iggs."
"I love you too, Prompto! You have no idea-"
. . .
III - I feel like I can fly when I stand next to you
"Well, I'd like to think I've got a pretty good idea," the blond chuckled, and there was a light snort at the other end, too.
Their feelings had crept up to them like an assassin in the dark, sneakily and without either of them paying them any heed. Not until the fire had already bursted in the form of the hungry, withheld and ravenous kisses that had swept them off their feet and left them clinging onto each other's warmth like the world wasn't ending. It had been sudden, and yet they had wasted so much time already for not realizing what had been obvious to everyone else for so long. 'Took them long enough,' as Gladio had put it the morning the two of them had joined him with Prompto holding Ignis's hand instead of the usual upper arm, and the strategist had planted a light peck onto his hand as the blond had brushed the man's shoulder shyly.
"Yes. I suppose you do," Ignis was smiling into the phone; the gunner's heart leaped. It wasn't much, but he would do anything to help Ignis to cope with this. He wasn't kidding anyone by trying to pretend he knew what Ignis was going through. But the blond knew about getting one's world blown apart and trying to pick up the pieces to put together something habitable. He couldn't undo what had been done, but he could - would! - be there for him. See this through with him. Because the man meant the world to him.
"Better?"
"Yes, lots. Thank you, love. I do apologize. My emotions...seem to have gotten the best of me." The blond snorted, rolling his eyes.
"You really don't need to sound all court appropriate with me, you know."
"...Some habits die hard, I suppose."
"Think you'll be okay?" he asked, mildly concerned. "We can keep talkin' if you want to."
"I assure you, I don't need you fussing over me. Alas, I do not want to keep you from acquiring a decent night's rest."
"You sure?"
"Yes. I'll be fine from here. Just…" The voice faded, a troubled pitch appearing into it.
"I know," Prompto nodded into the darkness. "It's gonna be alright."
"With you by my side, I'm sure of it." And secretly Prompto was greatful of the surrounding darkness, for he feared that even through the phone, Ignis knew exactly how heat crept over his cheeks, making them glow. "Goodnight, Prompto." In the other end, Ignis was smiling.
"G'night. Love you, Iggs."
"I love you too."
Prompto waited to hear the static sound as Ignis hung up before he lowered the phone from his ear, and switched the screen off. Letting out an elated sigh, he crossed his arms lazily as he rested himself against the window; his lips curved upwards at the edges as he gazed at the shimmering hue spreading across the sky. They had a long road to go - Ignis had a long road to go - but they would walk it. Together. And, when Noct would one day come back - they'd be ready.