For DreamStallion33's "Carlisle Gets Served" Forum Challenge.

I have absolutely no idea what goes on at a trial, so I'm sorry if there are any mistakes or if I got anything wrong.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

***

"Relax, Carlisle." Esme rubbed Carlisle's shoulders soothingly, not wanting to show just how anxious she was. Hiding her stressed face from view, she continued. "I'm sure you'll do fine. We've spent weeks preparing you for this. You've watched a total of thirty six recorded hours of teen and adult court, and on top of that you have a report nearly ten pages long on why you're innocent."

Carlislefixed his tie and played around nervously with the collar of his suit, looking for anything to help calm him down. "I know, I know. But I killed the child! I had to watch her die! I deserve to get sued. I should go to jail for this." He sighed, checking his watch for the umpteenth time and ignoring the calming waves sent towards him.

Esme continued to rub her fingers in soothing circles on his back, trying to think of something to take his mind off of the problem. "Carlisle, relax! You weren't even the doctor who treated her! You were just an assistant for the surgery." Seeing that Carlisle was still acting like Emmett on Christmas, she continued. "I'll go tell Emmett and Rosalie to get dressed—nearly ten hours and they haven't yet broken down." Esme smiled warmly, the strain disappearing from her face. Strangely enough, Carlisle didn't even crack a smile, just remained as fidgety as before.

Jasper came down in a suit then, carrying a stack of papers, a video camera, and several pieces of "evidence." Alice followed down behind him in a black ruffle dress, her face going blank every few seconds. It was only a slight comfort to Carlisle having that confidence and reassurance of doing well. "We have to get to court now. Carlisle will automatically be declared guilty if he's late."

Bella came downstairs a few minutes later, holding two year old Renesmee, followed by Edward and Jacob. "I can't believe it," he muttered. "Granddaddy Leech gets sued. But what can I say? Everyone makes a mistake sometime in their life. After all, nobody's perfect . . . except me, of course." Jacob smiled, showing all of his teeth, and patted Carlisle innocently on the shoulder.

Esme and Alice glared at Jacob, who immediately tried to lighten the mood. "Come on, guys. This is a trial, not a funeral procession we're going to. Why are we all dressed in black? Dress like the rainbow."

"Go and play with the fire hydrant, mutt! Go mark your territory somewhere else before I make you spontaneously explode!" Rosalie called from her bedroom.

"Only Rosalie would wish for someone to spontaneously explode because he marked his territory on her bed."

The Cullens—excluding Emmett and Rosalie—piled into two different cars and sped off to court, unknowingly leaving a very frightened Jacob, a very angry Rosalie, and a giant fire hydrant at home, possibly the leading cause of World War III.

***

The trial was long, nearly three hours of boring chatter, half of which was spent on introductions, claims, sets, and the jury murmuring their consult. Two police officers stood guarding the exits, and two more surrounded the stands. A jailer stood off to the side, in case of needs for immediate jailing for crime. Even with Alice's consistent visions of everything going well, Edward's reassurance that the judge was leaning their way, and Jasper's calming waves of emotion, not one of the Cullens felt the slightest bit calm.

Carlisle was more nervous than the rest of the Cullen family, even with Jasper's "convincing". His fingers were constantly twitching, and his hands were running repeatedly through his hair. Squirming around in his seat, Carlisle took several deep breaths. He could faintly smell the scent of both human and animal blood, reminding him that he hadn't gone hunting in several weeks. It wasn't until Jasper—his lawyer—made his call that Carlisle finally started concentrating.

"Defendant calls Emmett McCarty Cullen to the stand." The judge's voice was grave, filled with boredom and exhaustion. When did Emmett get here? and Of all people, why would Jasper be calling Emmett to the stand? Were the only thoughts going through Carlisle's mind.

Not moments later, Rosalie walked in, fully clothed and growling to her husband quietly, a disgusted look on her face. Several of the older men gawked out her, mouths hanging wide open in shock. Emmett followed proudly behind her, not a single piece of clothing covering him. Every person in the courtroom gasped, and the judge looked as if he was about to vomit. Only Mrs. Mallory--otherwise known as a crazy, Cullen obsessed stalker by nearly everyone in all of Washington state--giggled and sent him a flirty smile.

Emmett walked up to the stand, a goofy, lopsided grin on his face. He picked up his suitcase and set it on top of Jasper's. "I rest my case."

A few people in the courtroom laughed, Mrs. Mallory the loudest and most obnoxious of all, but a majority looked away in disgust. The judge laid his head in his hands, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Damn pretty psycho hippies. They always have to tempt me."

The leading accuser looked bewildered at his opponent's near family atrocity. Emmett continued, an almost joyous smile plastered on his pale face, clearly showing he was embracing his inner five year old. "In 1492, Carlisle performed a fatal surgery with glue. He was given support from"—

Rosalie got up and literally dragged Emmett out by the ear, the large courtroom doors slamming behind them. The judge blinked several times, a look of nausea passing over his face. "Is there anyone else who would like to speak?" He regretted the words once they left his mouth.

An old man with an IV attached to his arm and a cane bigger than the man himself stood up. "I believe he should be sent to Mr. Jayers! Mr Jayers always keeps his kitties locked up good and tight! The criminals have been put to the chambers because of Jayers!" He waved his cane around angrily, hitting a few people as we did so. "You people decide whether we live on Earth or a foreign planet filled with aliens and space dung!"

The judge rested his hand on his heart, his face mimicking Carlisle's exact expression. Jasper looked at the jury carefully, persuading them to declare his father innocent with his gift. Alice's face blanked out every few seconds, her facial expression changing from one of shock to one of happiness. Edward's eyebrows were furrowed together, trying to focus on each member of the jury's mind. Renesmee sent the judge and each member of the jury an adorable and lovable smile, trying to win them over.

The jury leader stood up, a piece of paper with a number of ink blotches seeping through it. "The defendant's sons have committed a number of crimes, and yet the defendant's criminal record remains clean. Therefore, the decision has been done unanimously. Carlisle Cullen, aged thirty seven and leading doctor of Forks, has been declared"--

***

I awoke with a start, nearly falling of the bed. I groaned and wiped the curly hair that had stuck to my sweaty face and neck throughout the night. The sheets were twisted around my legs in a wrinkly mess, and feathers covered my bed. Still groaning, I sat up and pulled on my red slippers and silk robe Auntie Alice had insisted on me getting. She said it would be perfect to wear in a few years, something I never really understood and my parents had hated her for.

I walked downstairs, still faint from the dream. Momma was in the kitchen cooking me breakfast with Grandma Esme and Auntie Rose and Alice were out shopping, so I went to watch TV in the den with Jake. I found it uncomfortable when people could see my dreams just by holding my hand, so I had resorted to just telling them about my dreams instead. "I had the weirdest dream last night," I told him, leaning against his broad shoulder. He had tried cutting his hair yesterday, and now it was just a shaggy mess.

Grandma Esme walked in carrying my breakfast, a warm motherly smile on her face. "Was it about Carlisle getting sued? Edward told us." She wiped her flour covered hands on a decorative dishtowel.

"Yes!" I wasn't surprised Daddy had told them what my dream was this time; it was definitely something Carlisle would enjoy hearing about. Jake and Emmett would mock him for the rest of his existence. I automatically burst out laughing at what my crazy psychopath of a brother had done in my dream. "Emmett walked in then, in all his naked glory." Emmett whined from upstairs, but everyone else laughed.

I shook my head, trying to contain my laughter. Upon passing he window, a brightly colored object caught my attention. I got up to get a closer look, and in shock, realized what it was. I dialed Auntie Rose's cell phone number, punching each key angrily. She picked up after the first ring. Without giving her a chance to say hello, I spoke. "Care to explain why there is a fire hydrant in the backyard?"

"What's that Renesmee? I'm sorry, I can't hear you. I'm going through a tunnel," she responded. A heard a spalshing sound, like something being dropped water, and then the line went dead. I growled quietly before tossing my phone aside and plopping back down on the couch with Jacob.

To my surprise, the house phone rang, screeching loudly throughout the house. Grandma Esme handed me my plate of eggs and bacon--two of the few human foods I liked--and a cup of water before leaving the room to answer it. "Hello?" She nearly dropped the phone in shock. "Oh, my gosh! Carlisle, you're being sued!"

And of course, Jacob always knew just what to say.

"You just got served!"

So did you like it? I spent a while working on this, so I hope it's worth the read. It's short, but honestly this was pretty hard to write. "Mr. Jayers" is what my great grandfather called "jail" when he was younger. (Don't ask.) Thanks for reading!

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