Disclaimer to Big Time Rush. Warnings: Rated M for language and alcohol.
How Did We Get Here?
Kendall woke up and found himself in his favorite place, James' arms. He wasn't sure whether to smile or frown. They seemed to be caught in a never ending circle of hurt and passion.
He carefully untangled himself from James and got dressed. He gathered his things and kissed James' forehead. He needed to leave, and was afraid that if he waited for James to wake up, he wouldn't leave at all. He couldn't help but look back at James sleeping before he left. Kendall smiled sadly before forcing himself to leave. He had to keep telling himself that it was for the best.
He had almost made it to the door when he ran into a little problem. James' little dog, Fox, was sitting there barking at him. Kendall quickly glanced over his shoulder before crouching down to Fox. "Hey buddy. I'll miss you." He scratched the dog's head before standing up and heading towards the front door once again.
"Hey where are you going?" Shit, this is just what Kendall needed.
"What are you doing awake?" Kendall asked instead, hoping to avoid the question.
"I heard Fox barking and when I woke up, you weren't next to me. Why?" Kendall's eyes suddenly took in the fact that James had adorable bed head, and he was clad in only boxers. Why the hell was James so attractive? It was making everything way harder than it needed to be.
"I just…have somewhere I need to be." Kendall prayed that James would just let him go soon. His willpower was shrinking.
"Oh, well will I see you soon?" James looked so cute and hopeful as he asked and Kendall wanted to slam his head against the wall.
"I'm not sure exactly. I really have to go, ok?" Kendall replied and averted his gaze to the ground. James stepped forward into Kendall's personal space and studied his face.
"I can tell that you're hiding something from me. Just tell me." Kendall gulped and opened his mouth to respond when James' phone began to ring. Kendall sneered. It was probably the bitch calling.
"Lemme guess…it's Hailey?" James raised an eyebrow before checking the id and ignoring the call.
"Hailey? That's what this is all about?" Wow, James finally seemed to have it figured out. Kendall ran his hands through his hair and fought the urge to scream. He would never be able to escape now.
"Everything used to be perfect James! Then she waltzed into your life and ruined everything! How could you not have seen that before?" Okay, so spilling his guts out to James was not in his plan.
"It's not even real! How is it ruining everything?" Kendall had never wanted to punch something as bad as he did at that moment.
"Oh my god! I'm so sick of that damn excuse. 'It's not real!'" He mocked James' voice.
"It isn't a real relationship! I never see her unless a million cameras are around. I don't love her, hell I don't even like her!" Kendall scoffed.
"Oh you don't love her? You don't love me either! If you didn't like her, why the hell does she keep texting you? Even if it's not a 'real relationship,' it still hurts to see her all over you and the two of you sucking face and looking like the happiest couple ever." All of his feelings kept spilling out all at once.
"Okay, first of all, I didn't give her my number, so that isn't my fault. I'm being FORCED to date her. You know my manager said that it was too suspicious looking that there were no reports of me having a girlfriend. Like I said, I don't like her. You have no idea how many times I wished I could shove her into a bush and kiss YOU in public and be out with YOU. Despite whatever you might think, I do love you. You mean everything to me."
Kendall wished more than anything that he could believe James. "That's the thing James. I would give up everything and anything for you. Your career is the most important thing to you, and you can't deny that." He could feel the break-up coming.
James sensed Kendall's tone and panicked. "Kendall, I feel nothing for Hailey, I promise. Please don't leave me I love you."
"Our relationship just isn't working out James. It kills me to see you date someone else, real or not. You still have to kiss her, hug her, and hold her hand. We also have like no time together anymore. When our schedules align, we spend our time together fighting or having sex. Where's the love? It's best that I just get away. I love you." With those words Kendall left.
He wished he hadn't ended his speech with 'I love you,' because it just made it harder for them both. It would hurt like hell, but eventually Kendall thought he could move on. It was better to feel pain for a short while than deal with the pain of staying in a relationship with James the way it was going.
James was miserable. He had no idea how many days had passed since Kendall had left him. It was too long. He needed his Kendall back.
His phone started vibrating again and he chucked it without a second thought. It had a pretty good case, but it's not like he liked the damn thing that much. At first, each time it went off he would check it in hopes of it being Kendall. Instead, it was Hailey, his manager, or one of his friends asking him if he was okay or wanting to go out and do something. He was tired of everyone bugging him.
"James?" he heard his best friend ask from outside his door. James groaned and rolled so that his face was pressed into the couch. He didn't want company.
He heard the jingling of keys and then the knob turning. Damn, he shouldn't have given Logan a key. He heard Logan open and shut the door, and tried to sink into the couch hoping he could magically disappear.
Logan sighed and James could picture Logan running his hands through his hair in annoyance. James reluctantly rolled over to face his best friend. "Hi" was the only thing he could manage. Logan raised an eyebrow.
"Okay, James. What's the deal?" What's the deal? The deal is that the love of his life left him and James had no idea where he could possibly be.
Instead of telling Logan that, "Didn't Kendall tell you?" came out of his mouth.
Logan shook his head. "Carlos told me." James groaned. Carlos knows where Kendall is? Is Carlos with him? Did Logan know where Kendall is?
"Logan, please tell me you know where he is." James looked up at Logan pleadingly; ready to beg if he had to.
"James… I do but I can't tell you." James shot up off of the couch and shook Logan's shoulders.
"You have to tell me! I need to see him. Please?" Just as James was about to get down on his knees and beg, Logan sighed and nodded.
"Okay, I will. First, I have to come with you. I also should probably warn you, so that you are prepared."
James nodded eagerly. He'd do anything to see Kendall again. Logan sat down on the couch and James followed.
"When Carlos called me and told me everything that happened, he told me that he was staying with Kendall for a little while. He informed me that, while Kendall misses and loves you, the chances of him wanting to actually get back together with you are slim. He had solid reasons for the break up."
James' newfound hope dropped majorly, but he refused to give up. He had to try. "Okay Logan, but that doesn't stop me from wanting to see him." Kendall's major reason for breaking up with him was his career supposedly being more important than Kendall. There was only one way to fix this.
Kendall sadly glanced out the window. He was in a city with a million things to do day and night, and all he could manage was being depressed. Thank god for Carlos. Kendall didn't want to be alone.
Too many times he had wanted to text or call James and take the whole thing back. Each time, he had to stop himself. He had his reasons, and he needed to stick to them. He felt like he had an angel and a devil battling to the death inside his head. His opinion kept flipping and he had no idea which side he wanted to follow through with.
He groaned. Where was Carlos? Kendall turned back to the room he hadn't left since he arrived. It was then he decided to try and forget his pain and confusing thoughts. He was glad he was of age, because he was going to get drunk.
James' excitement and hope turned into worry and nervousness. Logan's words kept playing in his head as they got closer. The hotel was right there and James found himself in desperate need of some courage.
Logan and James arrived in their room and put their stuff down. James waited until Logan used the bathroom to escape. He needed a little alcohol to build up his strength to talk to Kendall and knew Logan wouldn't approve.
A couple of drinks were harmless, right?
A couple of drinks turned into James getting completely wasted. He found himself stumbling around until he ran into someone.
"Heyyy! You look just like my ex!" James yelled happily. The blonde giggled and threw his arms around the brunette.
"Yoooou look just like my Jamie." James took a closer look at the blonde wrapped around him and his brain finally caught that it was Kendall.
"K-Kendall?" Kendall glanced up at the brunette. Hey, what do you know? It was James.
"Jamie!" Kendall squeezed James and kissed him. James was caught a little off guard, but he returned the kiss with as much passion as his drunk self could muster.
The next morning brought three things: confusion, pain, and shock. The pain was from the hangovers. The shock was the situation they woke up to, and the confusion was because most of the previous night was a complete blur.
Kendall groaned as he woke up to blinding light streaming through the hotel window. He shoved his face into the pillow and tried to fall back asleep, but he realized he really needed to pee. He groaned again and tried to carefully get up, but found himself stuck. He was being held in place by James.
Kendall gulped as he realized both he and James were completely naked, with interesting doodles covering each of their torsos. What the hell did they do last night? How and when did James show up?
Kendall escaped to the bathroom after throwing on some pants. He tried to search his aching head for memories of last night, but only got fuzzy pictures. Maybe he could figure something out after his headache disappeared.
Kendall filled a glass of water and took a couple of pain killers, leaving the bottle out for James. When Kendall returned to the main area of the hotel room, he saw James was awake. James laughed as soon as he saw the various doodled littering Kendall's chest, but winced when his head started pounding harder.
On Kendall's chest, there was what looked to be a terrible drawing of Fox, a heart with KK + JD inside of it, the words 'Property of James Diamond', and some smiley faces. Kendall seriously hoped they had been smart enough not to use Sharpies, but with his luck today, he doubted they used pen or washable markers.
Kendall pointed down at James' chest, which was even worse. There was what Kendall assumed was a unicorn, a graphic drawing of a penis, the word 'Kendall's' with an arrow pointing down towards James' cock, and an outline of Kendall's hand.
Kendall sat down on the edge of the bed. How wasted did they get last night? He looked over at James, who looked white as a ghost. Kendall was about to ask what the problem was, when he noticed James staring at his hand in wonder.
Kendall couldn't help but look at James' hand as well, wishing he hadn't. There was a gold band around his ring finger. Although he already knew what had happened, Kendall glanced at his own ring finger. What the fuck did they get themselves into?
Kendall was pacing while James was in the shower. They hadn't discussed how to fix this yet, James claimed that he needed a shower and his headache to go away first. Kendall glanced at the clock on the little nightstand. He swore that was the longest shower in the history of the world.
James finally came out and joined him. Kendall took one glance at him and groaned. He knew exactly what James was trying to pull. "Will you put a damn shirt on!?" James was trying to distract Kendall with his looks. Even with the stupid doodles, it was working.
James sighed and pulled a t-shirt on. He sat down on the bed and watched Kendall continue to pace and run his hands through his hair in frustration. "I don't understand why you are so stressed out over this."
Kendall turned to face him, pulling at his hair. "Are you nuts? This is NOT an ideal situation. We broke up. I escaped to Vegas! You weren't supposed to follow me, and we definitely weren't supposed to get married!"
James frowned. "There's not even a little teeny tiny part of you that is happy we are married?" James obviously didn't share the same views as Kendall on their little situation.
Kendall planted himself beside James and tried not to get angry. "Getting married won't solve all of our problems, James."
James jumped, up pointing his finger at Kendall. "Ah hah! So you ARE happy we got married! Even if it is just a little."
Kendall frowned. "I didn't say that!"
James smirked, much to Kendall's annoyance. "You don't have to. I just know."
Kendall ran his hands over his face and exhaled. "I still love you, James. Feelings don't just instantly disappear. Even so, can you honestly tell me that us being married is a good thing?"
James' shoulders sagged. "I guess not. Will you hear me out though? Please?"
Kendall nodded and looked over at him. James took in a breath and started.
"I'm willing to change for you, Kendall. I sent my manager an e-mail stating that if I couldn't call it off with Hailey, I would quit. I don't have a response yet, but even if that career path ends, it doesn't even come close to being as bad as losing you. I love you, Kendall. Can you at least give me another chance? Before we get divorced, can we try to live happily together and work on our differences?"
Kendall looked at James in astonishment. James was really willing to essentially throw his career away for him? James was proving Kendall wrong.
"Okay," was all he could respond with.
"Okay? Okay?" James hugged Kendall and spun him around out of happiness, before letting him go and clutching his head. Hangovers were still a bitch.
They still had stuff to work through, and pieces of last night to put together. It wouldn't be perfect, but what relationship really is?
Kendall and James were all packed up. Carlos and Logan had been informed of everything and returned back to their homes after some fighting between the four. They worked everything out in the end.
James tugged Kendall with his hand. "Come on, hubby! We have a baby to get home to."
Kendall's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. What wasn't James telling him?
James laughed at Kendall's scared and surprised expression before explaining himself. "Fox? He missed you!"
Kendall's heart rate returned to normal, as relief took over him. They needed to deal with one thing at a time.
Ta da! I have been working on this since Kendall's birthday. So, forever basically. This was based off of Waking Up In Vegas by Katy Perry,(which I also don't own) but I didn't want to give anything away! Sorry if the ending was a little rushed! Until next time.