My first story for the Pearlnet bomb, Beginnings and Secrets, it's before midnight so it counts. Pre-canon AU set during the war. hope you like it.
"Rose, I need to request that I don't go on missions with Garnet anymore," they were just words said by Pearl to Rose, but the stabbed through Garnet's being when she heard them all the same. The fusion had been simply going for a walk looking for Rose and Pearl, assuming rightfully that they would be together. She hadn't meant to eavesdrop but it had looked like a private conversation and Garnet was simply going to wait until they were done to pretend like she had just arrived. But the first thing that Garnet overheard had been those words, well it left her unable to move.
It had been a month since they had first formed Sardonyx on the battlefield. The new fusion was so powerful and precise that the battle had been won in what felt like moments. When they separated they staggered apart as if they had been fused for days, but Garnet felt something change within her. Sardonyx's love and joy, her pride at being born, her strength, it had been all so overwhelming in the best way possible. Garnet had never felt this way before it was so powerful and warm, but in its own way different from what Ruby and Sapphire had felt when they became her. Garnet never had a chance to talk to Pearl about what she felt, she had always known that the pearl was more than a simple friend or mentor. She hadn't let herself admit it since Pearl was so devoted to Rose and Garnet was unused to existence let alone love, but now she was sure what she felt was something special. And if the way it felt to be Sardonyx was any indication than there was something there on Pearl's end to.
But then the battle was over and there were too many wounded that needed to be taken to Rose's fountain or to the gem herself. They didn't have time to talk about feelings when their comrades were dying. So Garnet waited, and waited, Pearl was Rose's right hand so she had been busier than ever, since the battle Garnet had barely a moment to speak with the smaller gem before she was warping off somewhere else. Garnet understood, but the feeling never left her, Pearl's absence only seemed to hurt more than it had before and Garnet needed to talk to her former teacher on why she felt this way. She had thought that if they could only discuss what she, maybe even what they felt, they might be able to grow closer. That was why she had tracked her down that day, she was trying to force a conversation they should have had weeks ago, but instead of confirmation she was just learning on how disgusting she was too the former servant.
Pearl didn't want to go on missions with her anymore? She wasn't the first gem to ask to not be assigned to a squad with Garnet; in fact most gems in the rebellion had made the same request to Rose. So many in fact, that Garnet normally did her missions solo or with Rose or Pearl, but was Pearl like them and she didn't notice? Did Pearl just tolerate her for Rose's sake?
"Pearl," Rose said lifting the smaller gem's chin up. Pearl's shame was obvious and enough to make it so she was unable to look Rose in the eye. "Pearl you know that I would do almost anything for you without question, but I need to know why you don't want to go on missions with Garnet," she didn't ask unkindly, but even from a distance Garnet could hear the disappointment in Rose's voice.
"I-I'm just uncomfortable around her Rose," Pearl confessed it was hard but she managed to get the words out. Uncomfortable that was the trendiest way the other rebels used to describe their disgust of Garnet, tears started to fall from all three of the fusions eyes. She had never expected Pearl to feel that way about her, she had been so kind and understanding on the surface. Patient when teaching the fusion how to walk and run and fight, all of that was a lie?
"If we're in camp I can pretend like I'm normal so she isn't forced to face the other's judgments alone. Maybe as long as we're with you on missions I can pretend like nothing's changed too, but I just can't be alone with her Rose, I just can't," Pearl said her eyes were full of tears as she confessed to Rose.
"Pearl this is Garnet, your friend your student, you know how much she looks up to you," Rose pleaded the idea of her trusted friend and right hand despising Garnet for what she was hurt. She was a gem who loved everyone and everything, even her enemies, she couldn't understand why so many gems were disgusted by Garnet's existence but she never thought Pearl would be one of them.
"I know Rose," Pearl shouted while clenching her head as if she was in pain. "I know she looks up to me, I feel awful for feeling what I do, but I do and her affection just makes it worse." Tears started pouring down the pearl's face to match the fusion who was still hiding. "It's just when she's around me I can't think straight, I feel a burning in my gem, I can't even look at her any more without those feelings bubbling up. She's just so-."
Three things happened at that very moment, the first was Garnet started to come apart despite Ruby and Sapphire trying to stay fused. She had been smashed by the words of the one she admired and it hurt so much. She could have faced rejection, she would have survived, but to know that the one she cared for so much couldn't stand to even look at her… she had withstood enough pain for Ruby and Sapphire, they could stand to bare hers this time she thought as her body began to come apart.
The second was that Rose furiously shouted, "Pearl," in an attempt to interrupt her right hand, as the two sides of Rose Quarts went to war with each other and she didn't want to hurt the smaller gem. No one, not even her enemies could deny the pink gem was a warrior, a nightmare on the battlefield, but she was also sweet and nurturing. Normally Rose just fought to protect her friends, and that included from the harsh words directed at them. The quartz had destroyed the physical forms of dozens of rebels after they attempted to insult and demean Garnet, as a warning, anyone other than Pearl would be back in their gem praying they didn't get broken for their own stupidity. Yet she also wanted to comfort the Pearl, her oldest friend and she was crying, Rose wanted to comfort her, but she knew if Pearl actually insulted Garnet the warrior side would win out.
The third was what shocked the other two, paralyzing them, and that was Pearl finishing her sentence, not with an insult, but with a, "beautiful." The soft way she said it made Rose stop mid snarl and bond Garnet back together so she could hear what she was saying with her own ears.
"What was that," Rose asked unsure if she heard her best friend correctly.
"I said she's just so beautiful," Pearl shouted the words this time as she struggled to wipe her tears away, "so beautiful and strong, and sweet, and the way all three of her eyes practically glow when she sees something new to her just makes me feel happier than I've ever felt before Rose. She's so wonderful I can barely think when I'm around her and since we fused to become Sardonyx it's gotten even worse. I know I shouldn't feel this way towards her, but I can't help it."
"Pearl why are you crying, that's wonderful," Rose said her face a light with glee now that she didn't have to smite her best friend. Not only that but to learn that her most trusted comrade was in love with one of her other beloved comrades, this was the opposite of awful.
"Because it's wrong for me to feel this way Rose," Pearl said shouting again. "I shouldn't feel this way about Garnet. She's an embodiment of Ruby and Sapphire's love for each other; I can't just force my way into that."
Garnet wanted to leap out from behind the tree she was hiding behind and tell the pearl she wouldn't be forcing her way into anything, that she'd be invited and welcomed, but she couldn't. She didn't want the gems she respected and loved even to think poorly of her for eavesdropping on their private conversation, even if it was about her.
"Pearl you know that Garnet isn't just a Ruby and Sapphire standing on top of each other, she's her own gem with her own feelings. Why are you so against even trying to let Garnet know your feelings for her, she might feel the same way you do."
"Because she deserves more than me Rose, Garnet deserves more than a selfish defective pearl who can't devote herself to her," Pearl said turning away from Rose. "Garnet was born from an act of pure selfless love and because of that Ruby and Sapphire decided that they would rather be fused together into Garnet than be alone. I-I can't do that Rose, I can't be Sardonyx forever. Becoming her felt right and amazing, better than I've felt even as Rainbow Quartz, definitely better than I've ever felt as myself, but I still can't see myself being her forever, like Ruby and Sapphire did. Garnet," Pearl said looking at her hands ashamed, "Garnet deserves someone who will make the same choice for her that Ruby and Sapphire made for each other."
"That's okay Pearl," Garnet said finally standing firm, "don't have to feel ashamed of feeling that way," she said walking forward.
"Garnet," both Pearl and Rose shouted in shock, Rose's voice was happy though compared to Pearls fearful tones.
"I'm just going to leave the two of you alone," Rose said as she walked out of the small clearing they had been talking. On her way out, she placed a hand on Garnet's shoulder for just a moment, but the smile she gave the fusion said all it needed to.
With the two of them alone Pearl collapsed into a huddled mass, her arms encircling her knees as if to keep the world out. Without judgement Garnet sat down beside her and waited for the smaller gem to talk. "How much did you hear," Pearl asked muffled through her arms.
"I came in around the beginning I think, at least the first thing I heard was you requesting to not go on missions with me anymore. I'll admit it hurt when I heard that, I thought you were like the others, you know, disgusted by me," Garnet admitted.
"No Garnet, I could never," Pearl said actually popping out of her little safe space to tell her.
"I know Pearl," Garnet said interrupting the pearl and taking her whole huddled form and placing her on her lap, "I heard the rest too after all."
"Urgh," was all Pearl managed to say embarrassed that Garnet had heard everything. "I'm so-," she was about to apologize, but Garnet interrupted her.
"No Pearl, I'm sorry, but I'm never going to let you apologize for feeling the way you do," Garnet said with all the strength she could muster. She might still be getting used to existing, but she knew about love, maybe more than anyone else. "Especially when I feel the same way."
"You do," Pearl asked softly as if not believing what she was hearing. "But how can you care about someone who wouldn't go and make the same choice that Ruby and Sapphire made to create you."
"Yes Pearl, I care about you the same way and don't worry about not wanting to be Sardonyx you're not the only one who loved being her and still wants to be herself. Ruby and Sapphire made a choice to make me, you're right, they wanted to be fused together forever and make me. But fusing forever isn't the only way to love Pearl. It's not selfish to want to love yourself and you won't hear any complaints from me since I love you very much," Garnet said carefully wrapping her body around the pearl. "I know we have a lot to talk about Pearl, but I don't want you to be uncomfortable and I don't want to force you to say or do anything you don't want to do. But I just need to know if you'd be willing to give this whole thing with me." Garnet didn't want to come off weak or like she was begging, but she felt that it was important to be open and put herself out there.
"You're willing to try and love me," Pearl asked a mixture of scared and hopeful, "defects and all?"
"No Pearl," Garnet said turning the pearl around so they were looking at each other face to face, three eyes to two, "I'm already falling in love with you no trying needed, that isn't be a choice, but I'm willing to try and start something wonderful with you Pearl, as long as you're okay with it we can be together, just Garnet and Pearl, defects and fusion freakiness."
"Yes, Garnet," Pearl said her eyes once more filling with tears, tears of joy, "always yes Garnet," and their lips met, starting something wonderful.