Maybe it's not ment to be,
Maybe it's not for me,
Maybe things aren't what they seem,
Or maybe they decide to remain unseen.
Hermione sat in her dorm at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry late at night, her mind painstakenly awake. It probed her on her thoughts of things. Particularly one thing. Her best friend, Harry Potter.
It was he who was on her mind night and day, constantly, who probed her thoughts and made her second guess herself. At any time she felt upset about anything, it was Harry she would turn to. It was conforting to be in his arms when she was upset, to feel his warmth about her, and have her relax.
Though lately, mostly now, that she'd been thinking of him more than usual, not only because of the Dark Lord looming more than ever, but because she'd begun to see him in a new light. His smile would make her melt lately, his gaze would make her want to giggle like made like some flirty preteen. It was disgusting, it was vile... It felt so right.
So, as she lay awake, she thought of the thing standing in her way. Firstly, her own courage factor. She was completely scared these days about letting her feelings slip. She didn't want to scare him off and loose her best friend. If she'd lost that, she thought, she would probably die. The thought of not having him in her life made her sick to her stomach.
The second thing standing in her way, was Harry's girlfriend.
Oh yes, the vile and evil one, Jamie Hudson. The thought of her made Hermione quiver in anger. The way she clung to Harry like a magnet where ever he went, besides the common room. And it was pathetic, she thought, how she would act all high and mighty showing him off like some sort of prize, when he, had such strong feelings for this girl.
Hermione would wake up sometimes at night to Harry shaking her awake. He would be at times a complete nervous wreck without Jamie. Crying like a baby, and disheveled. It made Hermione sick to see Jamie not act like this, and treat Harry like some toy, when Harry obviously cared very much for her. She knew that Jamie was not right at all for him, but did not have the heart to make Harry more upset than he already was at times without her.
Sighing, Hermione tossed onto her side. Let us hope that this to shall pass, she thought as she slipped into a blissfully dreamless sleep.
***
Morning came slowly and in Gryffindor tower, spreading soft beams of sunlight streaming though the windows of the girls dormitory.
Hermione slowly awoke to another day, blinking slowly and truging into the girls bathroom to get ready for another day.
She turned the knobs on the shower and waited for the water to heat and slowly slipped into the shower stall, letting the water flow about her, waking her up completely, letting the water cascade down her back, through her hair and around her.
She stepped out of the shower, dried off and got dressed. She sat in front of the bureau mirror brushing her hair, though at no avil.
Her hair, she thought, was the worst imaginable, no longer bushy and such, but now very long, and slightly wavy, annoyed her to no end. There was nothing she could do with it, she thought. So tying it into a sloppy bun, she grabbed her bag and headed down to breakfast.
'Breakfast, oh joy," she mumbled as she walked into the Great Hall, and seeing the small numbers of other students trickling into the hall. She truged over to the Gryffindor table and started nibbling on a biscut and studying for Arithmancy.
For at least fifteen minutes she sat studying, until as usual, the loud footsteps of her other friend Ron Weasly bounded toward the table.
" 'mornin Hermione" he said taking a plate and filling it with his usual amount of sasuage and toast.
Hermione looked up from her Arithmancy book.
"Good morning, Ron," she said with a forced grin.
Ron Weasly, now theres the other person she used to think about almost as constantly as Harry. He had been her friend, like Harry, since first year. Though lately he'd become more of an annoyance than a friend. Always walking joviantly, going through so many girlfriends, so quickly, and constantly making trouble. He had now moved onto trying to re-establish his relationship with Hermione and Harry. After an incident which had embarassed the both of them. And had been the center of gossip for quite some time afterwards.
He'd found a diary while walking down the hall, at the time Hermione was rushing about looking for hers, and he'd read it. He didnt know who it belonged to at the time, obviously neglecting the fact it had Hermione's name on the first page. And he'd gone about telling certain people bits and peices out of it. Bits about Harry, and himself, and the way Hermione was feeling.
That is what had ruined their relationship with Ron.
Hermione was about to take a bite of her biscut when she felt someone tap her shoulder. She turned around, and saw the most horrible sight she'd seen ever in her life so far.
It was Harry. His hair was a complete and utter mess, resembling a huge matted ball of hair. His green eyes were a shade brighter than they normally were, around his eyes was a red puffyness that suggested he'd been crying, and in great amounts. His cloak looked as though it had been put on in a great hurry, inproperly buttoned, and a mess.
Her jaw dropped.
"Harry!" she exclaimed exasperately. "What happened?"
"Nevermind... I need to talk to you," he said his voice quivering and short and shallow, as though he'd had something loged in his throat making it completely hard to talk.
"Alright," said Hermione putting her book into her bag quickly and grabbing a couple biscuts. "I'm coming."
Harry took her hand and they walked through the Great Hall, and down the front steps and towards the lake, towards the spot they both went to, to talk in private since the diary incident. To talk things out that had been bothering them both.
The both sat down on the freshly cut grass, and Hermione glanced at Harry, who was fervently wiping his glasses on his robe.
"Harry, what happened to you?" she asked. "You don't look well."
Harry took a deep shuddering breath. "Jamie, she, she's.. she'd been... and then..." His voice broke off.
"Harry I think you should take some nice deep breaths, come on, in through your nose out through your mouth," said Hermione helping him so he could now breathe properly.
"Hermione, she'd been lying all this time."
"What?" she said her mouth dropping open.
"She'd been lying all this time," he said wiping his glasses again. "She never, she never loved me."
"Harry... I'm so sorry."
"Don't be, it's not your fault"
Hermione shook her head. "Harry, it is my fault, I knew she was bad news from the first time you'd introduced me to her. I knew she wasn't right for you."
She looked at the expression on Harry's face and continued.
"She was showing you off like some prize, Harry. It was horrible to watch. And then, you seemed so in love with her, I couldn't bear to tell you. And I don't think you'd have believed me anyway."
"I know," Harry said abruptly. "Last night she told me, and on the way while I was walking to the tower I was thinking this all over through my head. It was wrong... though I feel as though something has been wretched from me, like there is now a great hole in me."
"Hermione, thats how it feels, how it feels when you've been betrayed, and when you feel like you've been so stupid to believe that someone had actually loved you. And I was stupid to give in to begin with. I swear... that was the worst mistake I've ever made."
He shivered and Hermione scooted over closer to him and wrapped him into a hug.
"Harry, sshh... it's alright. Everyone makes mistakes at one time or another."
Harry hugged her back and they sat like that, as though reaching a mutual agreement through actions.
After what seemed like hours later, they got up and walked back to the castle, and went through into the Great Hall, which was now bustling with the school, laughter, loud discussion of the upcoming quidditch games, and the sound of chewing.
Harry and Hermione sat across from Ron, who was now in deep discussion about the Chudley Cannons with Seamus Finnagin. Ron's head snapped up.
"Where'd you two go off to?" he asked questioningly glancing at Harry's now slightly puffy eyes and Hermiones disgruntled expression of shock.
"We had to talk," Hermione said sharply. Ron obviously getting the point continued talking to Seamus.
Hermione's mind was now abuzz with thoughts, as though someone had eletrocuted her brain. So many thoughts, along the lines of 'Kill Jamie' and 'how, what, when, where, why' that blazed like burning wrought iron words stamped into the soft confines of her skull.
Maybe it's not for me,
Maybe things aren't what they seem,
Or maybe they decide to remain unseen.
Hermione sat in her dorm at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry late at night, her mind painstakenly awake. It probed her on her thoughts of things. Particularly one thing. Her best friend, Harry Potter.
It was he who was on her mind night and day, constantly, who probed her thoughts and made her second guess herself. At any time she felt upset about anything, it was Harry she would turn to. It was conforting to be in his arms when she was upset, to feel his warmth about her, and have her relax.
Though lately, mostly now, that she'd been thinking of him more than usual, not only because of the Dark Lord looming more than ever, but because she'd begun to see him in a new light. His smile would make her melt lately, his gaze would make her want to giggle like made like some flirty preteen. It was disgusting, it was vile... It felt so right.
So, as she lay awake, she thought of the thing standing in her way. Firstly, her own courage factor. She was completely scared these days about letting her feelings slip. She didn't want to scare him off and loose her best friend. If she'd lost that, she thought, she would probably die. The thought of not having him in her life made her sick to her stomach.
The second thing standing in her way, was Harry's girlfriend.
Oh yes, the vile and evil one, Jamie Hudson. The thought of her made Hermione quiver in anger. The way she clung to Harry like a magnet where ever he went, besides the common room. And it was pathetic, she thought, how she would act all high and mighty showing him off like some sort of prize, when he, had such strong feelings for this girl.
Hermione would wake up sometimes at night to Harry shaking her awake. He would be at times a complete nervous wreck without Jamie. Crying like a baby, and disheveled. It made Hermione sick to see Jamie not act like this, and treat Harry like some toy, when Harry obviously cared very much for her. She knew that Jamie was not right at all for him, but did not have the heart to make Harry more upset than he already was at times without her.
Sighing, Hermione tossed onto her side. Let us hope that this to shall pass, she thought as she slipped into a blissfully dreamless sleep.
***
Morning came slowly and in Gryffindor tower, spreading soft beams of sunlight streaming though the windows of the girls dormitory.
Hermione slowly awoke to another day, blinking slowly and truging into the girls bathroom to get ready for another day.
She turned the knobs on the shower and waited for the water to heat and slowly slipped into the shower stall, letting the water flow about her, waking her up completely, letting the water cascade down her back, through her hair and around her.
She stepped out of the shower, dried off and got dressed. She sat in front of the bureau mirror brushing her hair, though at no avil.
Her hair, she thought, was the worst imaginable, no longer bushy and such, but now very long, and slightly wavy, annoyed her to no end. There was nothing she could do with it, she thought. So tying it into a sloppy bun, she grabbed her bag and headed down to breakfast.
'Breakfast, oh joy," she mumbled as she walked into the Great Hall, and seeing the small numbers of other students trickling into the hall. She truged over to the Gryffindor table and started nibbling on a biscut and studying for Arithmancy.
For at least fifteen minutes she sat studying, until as usual, the loud footsteps of her other friend Ron Weasly bounded toward the table.
" 'mornin Hermione" he said taking a plate and filling it with his usual amount of sasuage and toast.
Hermione looked up from her Arithmancy book.
"Good morning, Ron," she said with a forced grin.
Ron Weasly, now theres the other person she used to think about almost as constantly as Harry. He had been her friend, like Harry, since first year. Though lately he'd become more of an annoyance than a friend. Always walking joviantly, going through so many girlfriends, so quickly, and constantly making trouble. He had now moved onto trying to re-establish his relationship with Hermione and Harry. After an incident which had embarassed the both of them. And had been the center of gossip for quite some time afterwards.
He'd found a diary while walking down the hall, at the time Hermione was rushing about looking for hers, and he'd read it. He didnt know who it belonged to at the time, obviously neglecting the fact it had Hermione's name on the first page. And he'd gone about telling certain people bits and peices out of it. Bits about Harry, and himself, and the way Hermione was feeling.
That is what had ruined their relationship with Ron.
Hermione was about to take a bite of her biscut when she felt someone tap her shoulder. She turned around, and saw the most horrible sight she'd seen ever in her life so far.
It was Harry. His hair was a complete and utter mess, resembling a huge matted ball of hair. His green eyes were a shade brighter than they normally were, around his eyes was a red puffyness that suggested he'd been crying, and in great amounts. His cloak looked as though it had been put on in a great hurry, inproperly buttoned, and a mess.
Her jaw dropped.
"Harry!" she exclaimed exasperately. "What happened?"
"Nevermind... I need to talk to you," he said his voice quivering and short and shallow, as though he'd had something loged in his throat making it completely hard to talk.
"Alright," said Hermione putting her book into her bag quickly and grabbing a couple biscuts. "I'm coming."
Harry took her hand and they walked through the Great Hall, and down the front steps and towards the lake, towards the spot they both went to, to talk in private since the diary incident. To talk things out that had been bothering them both.
The both sat down on the freshly cut grass, and Hermione glanced at Harry, who was fervently wiping his glasses on his robe.
"Harry, what happened to you?" she asked. "You don't look well."
Harry took a deep shuddering breath. "Jamie, she, she's.. she'd been... and then..." His voice broke off.
"Harry I think you should take some nice deep breaths, come on, in through your nose out through your mouth," said Hermione helping him so he could now breathe properly.
"Hermione, she'd been lying all this time."
"What?" she said her mouth dropping open.
"She'd been lying all this time," he said wiping his glasses again. "She never, she never loved me."
"Harry... I'm so sorry."
"Don't be, it's not your fault"
Hermione shook her head. "Harry, it is my fault, I knew she was bad news from the first time you'd introduced me to her. I knew she wasn't right for you."
She looked at the expression on Harry's face and continued.
"She was showing you off like some prize, Harry. It was horrible to watch. And then, you seemed so in love with her, I couldn't bear to tell you. And I don't think you'd have believed me anyway."
"I know," Harry said abruptly. "Last night she told me, and on the way while I was walking to the tower I was thinking this all over through my head. It was wrong... though I feel as though something has been wretched from me, like there is now a great hole in me."
"Hermione, thats how it feels, how it feels when you've been betrayed, and when you feel like you've been so stupid to believe that someone had actually loved you. And I was stupid to give in to begin with. I swear... that was the worst mistake I've ever made."
He shivered and Hermione scooted over closer to him and wrapped him into a hug.
"Harry, sshh... it's alright. Everyone makes mistakes at one time or another."
Harry hugged her back and they sat like that, as though reaching a mutual agreement through actions.
After what seemed like hours later, they got up and walked back to the castle, and went through into the Great Hall, which was now bustling with the school, laughter, loud discussion of the upcoming quidditch games, and the sound of chewing.
Harry and Hermione sat across from Ron, who was now in deep discussion about the Chudley Cannons with Seamus Finnagin. Ron's head snapped up.
"Where'd you two go off to?" he asked questioningly glancing at Harry's now slightly puffy eyes and Hermiones disgruntled expression of shock.
"We had to talk," Hermione said sharply. Ron obviously getting the point continued talking to Seamus.
Hermione's mind was now abuzz with thoughts, as though someone had eletrocuted her brain. So many thoughts, along the lines of 'Kill Jamie' and 'how, what, when, where, why' that blazed like burning wrought iron words stamped into the soft confines of her skull.