Shades of blue
This was written for challenge 16 of the artword community on Livejournal
Disclaimer: Not mine. No money made no harm intended, I do this just for fun.
Author's Notes: This is crack. Really. No way around it. And it was lots of fun to write. Please, please don't take it too serious. Or better yet, not serious at all. Thanks go to my lovely sister, Cass (ca_pierson). Who did the beta and made me hold on when I wanted to give up. You're awesome.
Prologue:
Being ascended sucked. Big time. That was a fact that Major John Sheppard had discovered pretty early on. When all those stupid, useless non-interference rules had gotten in his way of helping his friends, the people he called family. Not that he regretted having given his life to save his friends, to save Rodney. No, he knew it'd been the right thing to do, but now he couldn't help any more. Which really put a damper on the whole being a powerful, glowy … thingie. By now, John was bored out of his mind. But, he had a plan. A plan that would not only occupy his time until Rodney would ascend as well and join him – John was so gonna help him when the time came – no, he'd also make a few people happy. Well, he'd make a few versions of himself happy. Because the fact that John had died just after he and Rodney had found each other – before he could actually have a life with Rodney – didn't mean all the other versions in all the other dimensions couldn't be luckier.
John had checked – twice – and the rules only said he couldn't interfere with the events of his own/i space and time. It didn't say anything about the millions of other John Sheppards' lives he could make so much better. Oh yes, this was going to be so much fun. A few alternate versions of himself were in for a surprise. Because if John had learned one thing form peeking in on himself in various parallel universes it was that John Sheppard was the happiest if he was either involved with – or married to – Rodney McKay. And if some of his other selves needed a little shove, well, John would only be too happy to oblige.
oooooOooooo
Lt. Col. John Sheppard took one last look around, P-90 at the ready, before he stepped onto the platform that held the Stargate. He turned to face the open field and the distant forest again, walking backwards towards the Stargate, slowly. Something was making him uneasy, but he couldn't really put a finger on it. They had found nothing on MQ3-928, nothing at all that warranted the feeling that was creeping up his spine.
"Colonel, you coming?" McKay's impatient voice sounded from behind him and John sighed.
"Alright, McKay, let's go," John replied and turned around again to face Rodney, who stood right in front of the rippling blue event horizon of the activated Stargate.
"About time. They're serving meatloaf in the mess today and this mission was a colossal waste of our time again so I'm really …" John didn't really get to know what McKay had wanted to say any more, since he gave him a little shove, sending him stumbling through the event horizon. Sometimes Rodney was really trying John's patience. His skin tingled as he stepped through the Stargate himself, only to emerge on the other side, short of his team.
In fact, he wasn't sure that was the only thing that was missing. The gateroom looked the same, sure, but John recognized none of the people that were in close proximity. Which wasn't good. Not good at all. John raised his P-90, ready to defend himself if necessary, when a young man came down the stairs and John's stomach dropped out.
The boy … man was maybe 20 years old, dressed in what looked like a modified version of an Atlantis military uniform but at the place where his nationality flag should be was just another patch with a stylized 'A'. That wasn't what had John swallow hard and searching for words, though. No, it was the way the young man looked and moved that sent shivers down John's spine. He looked like a much younger, somehow a little … broader … version of John himself. He even had the same untamable hair. The only difference seemed to be that he had striking blue eyes. John knew he was staring, but he couldn't help himself. This was seriously creepy.
The grin that had been on the guy's face disappeared in favor of a frown that also seemed vaguely familiar, but somehow looked misplaced on the man's face, as he neared John giving him a once over.
"Dad? What are you doing here so early? And where are the others? What happened to you? You look …" His face fell and John didn't have time to be freaked out about the fact that this mini-me had called him dad, because he was taken by the arm and dragged off in the direction of the infirmary, while the guy rattled on. "Young. Don't tell me you ended up in another/I de-aging machine. Seriously, dad, you're gonna give uncle Radek a heart-attack sometime soon. He's not the youngest any more either, you know!"
John stopped dead in his tracks, forcing the young man, who had still been clutching his arm, to an abrupt halt as well. They were now standing in the middle of a corridor near the gate room and people were beginning to stare at them. Not that John cared much.
"Dad? What's the matter? Are you alright? You don't look too good, despite being … well, young," mini-me said and searched John's eyes.
"Who are you?" John stammered, feeling like someone had clubbed him over the head with something heavy.
The guy closed his eyes for a second before taking a deep breath, saying angrily, "Oh great, did whatever stupid gadget you activated this time take your memories away as well? It's me, Andy. I'm Andrew, your son? You know, as in related to you? Geez, you'd think my looks were a dead give-away. I'm practically your clone. Come on, dad, you have to admit it's pretty obvious."
"Who … who's your … mother?" John forced the words out through his dry mouth, cold sweat breaking out on his skin. He had no idea what was going on but something was seriously, seriously/I wrong here. Had he ended up in the future again?
"My mother?" mini-me … Andrew, asked incredulously, as if the question was the dumbest thing he'd ever heard. Come to think of it, he sounded a lot like McKay. "I don't think you should call Pa my mother unless you want to sleep on the couch again. Ugh, I can't believe I actually said that. No seriously. We need to get you checked out right now before all hell breaks lose. You need to remember so you can tell me what the hell you did this time and what you did with the group of Marines Colonel Lorne sent with you. You were going to put the newbies through some training, show them the ropes, remember?" Andrew sighed, sounding completely exasperated.
"Please tell me you didn't misplace them on your little 'vacation from paperwork'. They only just arrived and if you really lost them Colonel Lorne will be so annoyed. You know how he gets when you break his new toy soldiers. You remember Colonel Lorne, do you? He's the military leader around here. The one who got your job after you were made Governor of this colony? Come on, Dad, you've got to remember something." Andrew went on with his rant and he didn't even take a breath so John could actually say something. "Oh god, we really need to let Dr. Dex have a look at you."
"Dr. Dex?" John asked, trying to imagine Ronon as a doctor but came up blank. "You've got to be kidding me."
"What, you don't remember Jennifer either? But she's been here since before you …" he gestured at John with his hands, once again looking eerily like McKay and a lot less like John himself, "were … this age. Now come on, we haven't got all day!" Andrew grabbed hold of John's arm again and tried to drag him towards the infirmary once more, but John jerked free, forcefully.
"No, I'm not going anywhere with you. I am not your father and I didn't turn anything on at all. All I did do was to step through the gate on MQ3-928 and I ended up here. Only I'm alone, my team's gone and I don't know anyone around here, including you. I'm not who you think I am and I have no idea how I got here, or where here really is. Well, I'm not sure I shouldn't ask when I am instead of where. Because this is Atlantis, that much I know. So, maybe you should tell me what year it is instead of trying to drag me off to meet the doctor. I'm pretty sure she can't do anything for me. I'll need the help of McKay and Zelenka. I'm sure they can get me home to … my time … universe … wherever." John took a deep breath and then slowly let it out, trying to calm down. Then something occurred to him and he felt himself blanch. "McKay's still alive, isn't he?" he then asked mini-me … Andrew.
"What? Of course Pa is still alive and what's this talk about …" he narrowed his eyes and took a closer look at John, obviously searching for something. When his gaze reached John's tac-vest and weapon, his uniform and his boots, he suddenly tensed visibly placing a hand onto the gun in his thigh-holster. He didn't take it out though. "Oh fuck. You're really not him. Dad will have my head for not noticing. De-aging machines don't change clothes. Or weapons. We've not used P-90s for over ten years now."
Before John could say any more, somewhere behind them the Stargate activated and the gate-tech announced he was receiving General Sheppard's IDC.
And just like that, an already bad day went to hell.
oooooOooooo
One hour later found John in one of the smaller conference rooms, security detail stationed outside, and older versions of himself and Rodney inside with him. The General was leaning against the wall right across from where John was sitting, while McKay had taken up residence in one corner of the room, watching intently. And then there was Andrew. Andrew, who really was creeping John out quite a lot and who was sitting, still and tight lipped at the other side of John's table, slightly to the right. Looking at Andrew was difficult, it felt like looking into a distorted mirror. Recognizing traits of himself and McKay of all people wrapped up in one person was … unsettling, to say the least.
Seeing Andrew, knowing he was the personification of a relationship this universe's version of John and Rodney shared, made John's chest ache. John stubbornly refused to call it longing, forbidding himself to even go there. Forbidding himself to imagine what it would be like to be with Rodney in that way.
A long time ago, John had made a decision. He'd sworn to himself that, no matter how tempting and no matter how lonely or desperate for human contact he'd get, he'd never jeopardize flying for it. And now, now he wouldn't just lose flying, no he'd lose so much more if his control slipped and he got caught. He'd lose friends. He'd lose Atlantis, he'd lose his home.
So, seeing this version of himself interact with Rodney, seeing the love both of them so obviously had for their son was something akin to torture for John. He didn't want to see it, didn't want to know that in another reality another John Sheppard had been granted what John himself could never have. Fate sometimes really was a cruel bitch, to tease him with 'what-might-have-been' like that.
It made John angry. He'd been quite fine being oblivious, thank you very much. Now he was stuck with not only the images of the future in which McKay had been married to Jennifer – no, now John had the 'pleasure' of knowing that Rodney'd make quite a dedicated partner for John as well. That knowledge hurt. And it made John aggressive, made him want to hit something, hurt/I someone as much as he hurt himself. The rational part of John's mind told him that the people in the room with him weren't to blame, but the emotional part of John hated them for their obvious happiness.
His throbbing head buried in his hands for a moment, John finally looked up from the table in front of him, meeting the eyes of General Sheppard. How he hated this other version of himself at the moment. He had everything John had ever wanted from life. Everything John had ever dreamt of, or hadn't even dared to dream of. Love, a family, a home, a job he obviously loved. What John wouldn't give for even a tenth of what his other self had.
"So let me get this straight," John began, voice dripping with sarcasm. "He," John pointed at McKay now, "had your ass-baby after some ancient do-hickey gave him," John paused slightly and allowed himself a malicious grin, "girl parts. And then what? You lived happily ever after? Aww come on, you've gotta be kidding me. McKay? Really? This has to be some sort of cosmic joke or something. Because I can't in a million years see me and McKay of all people setting up house and raising a kid together. We'd kill each other before the first week is up."
John knew that was a low blow and judging by the way Andrew drew himself up, anger clearly visible on his face, John had hit his target spot on. Not that he actually disliked the kid, he just happened to be the personification of everything John longed for and would never allow himself to have. And chances were, if he pissed off his hosts badly enough, they'd hopefully just lock him up and be done with it until they could send him home. John really didn't think he could take much more of the happy Sheppard-McKay family.
"How dare you, you fucking son-of-a-" the kid started towards John, rage on his face and in his body language, but he was held back by the general, who grabbed his son's arm, preventing him from reaching John. A sharp, "Andrew!" brought the attention of the young man to his father, as a horrified look rushed over his face. Andrew's voice was accusing as he said, "but Dad, he insulted you and Pa. He's-"
John never got to know what Andrew had wanted to say, because the young man was interrupted by McKay's gentle but insistent voice. "John, Andy, would you let me have a word in private with Colonel Sheppard? I won't be long," McKay said. He had watched all of their interaction with mild curiosity, not even batting an eye when John had made his nasty little speech.
"Sure, Rodney. Come on, Andy, let's go," General Sheppard replied, tugging at his son's sleeve. But apparently Andrew had other plans. His eyes were still blazing with anger and John could imagine that he must have been a handful, growing up. At that thought another sharp pain shot through John's chest, but the willed it away. Now was not the time for this.
"I said, 'let's go'," the general's steely voice prevented his son to take any more action. "Do I need to make this an order, Lieutenant?" he asked and John was surprised to see his older self pull rank on his own son.
"No, sir," the kid replied, all fight leaving him. He walked to the door and left the conference room without sparing John another glance.
When John drew his eyes away from the door, he found McKay smiling at him amusedly. What the hell was going on?
"Now, I think you and I should have a chat, Colonel Sheppard," McKay said and walked over to John, taking the chair his son just had vacated. "You see, I've been dealing with a version of that particular John Sheppard defense mechanism for the better part of thirty years now. I know what you've been doing and I think I have an inkling about how much you have to hurt, if you get this … aggressive," McKay said mildly and John momentarily clenched his teeth so hard, his jaw hurt. What the hell? Where had that come from?
Struggling to keep up appearance, John frowned, asking, "Hurt? Me? Why would I be hurt? I have no idea what you're talking about." It was a badly concealed lie and both of them knew it.
"I'm talking about the fact that you saw the need to ridicule me and John in front of our son. You were out to hurt us, in fact I'm sure you were counting on us getting angry at you and locking you away. It's just such a … John thing to do. He's always tried to push people away. Before we got together he would hardly let himself be touched by anyone at all. I'd bet you're just the same," McKay said, looking as if the thought alone saddened him.
"I'm not him!" John hissed and balled his hands into fists. He hated it that McKay seemed to know his so well. He hated to be compared to 'Mr. Perfect', who obviously had done so much better than John ever would. Trying to keep himself in check, John went on, "I don't care that you think you know me, because you don't. This is not my universe since otherwise there'd be massive problems with the timeline. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt. So, spare me, please. I'm not him and I'll never be him. I have no idea what you think you know about me, but you're wrong. I'm nothing like him!" John insisted, knowing it was a lie even as he said the words out loud.
McKay seemed unimpressed by John's outburst. He looked at John thoughtfully for a second before he calmly said, "It's Andy, isn't it? He's the one who's getting to you so much. You can deal with seeing this other version of yourself and me, being together, knowing you are never going to allow yourself the luxury of having this. But it'd be your choice. Now Andy – Andy's something else. Andrew is the proof of what John and I have together. Of the life we share. He's everything you never thought you could ever have. Am I close?" McKay's voice was mild and there was something in his eyes that spoke of compassion but not pity. He probably knew John would deck him if he even hinted at pitying him.
Still, his words hurt and John felt his self-control slip. God, he hated these kind of things. At first he'd been stuck a few hundred-thousand years in the future of his own universe and own timeline, now he was stuck in both a different timeline and different reality. And wasn't that so much worse than being stuck with hologram McKay? The hologram at least hadn't been insulting. And even though it hadn't been the real deal, knowing McKay had cared for him enough to spend his life trying to find a solution to bring John home had been … comforting. And it had worked. John had returned to his own time. If only it were that easy now as well. Really, all John wanted to do was go home. To his own time, his own McKay, who was a buddy, alright, but nothing more. In fact, if John wasn't mistaken, Rodney had shown a certain interest in Jennifer Keller. Not that John could blame him, Jennifer was pretty and smart and sometimes even nice. So what was there not to like? And Rodney had always had a thing for blondes.
"Come on. Talk to me, Colonel. I'm not the enemy. You don't have to keep me … keep us at arm's length. It might take some time until we find a way so send you back and I'd like to think we can make you feel welcome here. Not everyone's out to hurt you, you know? Even though I'm sure you're convinced of the opposite," McKay had the gall to say and something in John snapped. Because right now it felt like the whole fucking universe was out to hurt him in one way or the other.
"Fuck you!" John cursed, folding his arms in front of his chest defensively. Rodney – this Rodney knew him better than John really liked. His observations were hitting too close to home.
To John's anger, McKay just smiled indulgently again and said, "Ah yes, that. You should try it with your universe's version of me. My blowjobs are also pretty spectacular, even if I say so myself. Sex has never been a problem at all between John and me, in fact I'd say it's the best sex I've had. I'm sure you'd be much happier if you were getting laid on a regular basis." The smile on McKay's face was just this side of dirty.
John swallowed hard. He'd fantasized about Rodney's mouth wrapped around his cock on occasion, but seeing McKay's grin now, hearing him talk like that did peculiar things to John's stomach. "You can't just say stuff like that. It's … it's just wrong. I'm not him. And my love life is none of your business. I'm fine," John insisted and glared at McKay angrily. It just wasn't fair that he was able to unnerve John that much. Not fair at all. Usually it was the other way around.
"Hmmm," McKay commented thoughtfully and shot John as skeptical look. "Alright, then let's talk about Andrew," McKay suddenly said and John had to swallow hard once again. It had been cruel to say the things he had said in front of the kid. But seeing him had really hurt quite awfully and John wanted to keep him as far away as possible. Both physically as well as mentally.
"He's special," McKay went on, pride in his voice and seemingly unaware of what just hearing the kid's name did to John. "Well, of course he is, with John and me as parents. He's very smart, has the gene, and he's inherited John's talent for flying. Unfortunately he's also inherited some of John's more … dangerous traits. You've seen, he's joined the Air Force, just like John and he's the youngest gate-team leader Atlantis ever had." A rueful little smile crept over McKay's face and he waved his hands about in his typical manner. "He's not unlike Sam Carter in that regard, actually. A soldier first, then a scientist. Only he's more brilliant than she was." Pride was back in McKay's voice and John just stared.
"He's leading his own gate-team? Are you nuts? He's what? Twenty? Twenty-one? Also, what the hell did you do to the kid? Have him genetically upgraded or something? So he's a genius like you, has my strong gene and my talent for flying. He's smarter than Sam Carter and he's both a scientist and soldier? What is he? Wonder boy? Aww, come on, this sounds like someone took all of our good traits, mixed them up and made some super-child. The next thing you're gonna tell me he's got the perfect manners, Jackson's talent for language, Teyla's fighting skills and he can run faster than Ronon on his best days. Please, that's just ridiculous."
Something rushed over McKay's face and his eyes turned serious. "You're right, the way I said it, it really sounded a lot like bragging, but believe me, he's no super-child. He's quite the contrary actually. Yes, he's smart, very smart in fact, but no, he's not like me. His gene, while natural, is not as strong as John's either, and while he does have John's talent for flying, it's born of hard work rather than the almost playful easiness, John always displayed. He's … mature. Like many people born and raised in Pegasus are, and that is why he's been entrusted with his own team very early. To be honest, half of the time I'm scared to death for him when he goes through the 'gate. He's a lot like John, trying to save them all. And there is the same look in his eyes I've seen in John's eyes, the one I'm seeing in your eyes right now. The one that speaks of 'not enough'. Never enough. Never good enough or smart enough or fast enough. No, he's not perfect, Colonel, not by a long shot. But he's our son and that fact alone makes him special to me and to John. And I know exactly what you see in him. The only difference is that I feel pride and joy instead of regret and pain when I look at him."
John didn't know what to say to that. It was true, watching Andrew did hurt and the longing that came with seeing him was laying like lead in John's belly. John had thought that if he somehow found a fault in the kid, if he could get McKay to admit that his golden-boy wasn't so golden after all, maybe then it would be easier to deal with the situation. But John had been wrong. All it had done was make Andrew more real. Make him more human, make him more lovable. Not a super-human. Just a kid that was giving his best despite the circumstances. Someone, John realized, he'd have liked to know and call a friend under other circumstances.
"He's almost twenty-four now," McKay continued, "and usually he has himself better under control than he did, earlier. You hit him at a weak spot, Colonel. But that was on purpose, wasn't it? You reacted to him the way you did because he's making you uneasy. He's getting under your skin and that's making you twitchy. Which brings us back to your defense mechanisms, doesn't it?" McKay asked, good-naturedly. "Andy is making you realize what you're missing out on." He sounded smug now, more like the McKay John was used to.
"I'm not missing anything. I've got everything I need … well, besides a Wraith free galaxy maybe. Seriously, McKay, I'm fine" John replied, grateful that the topic was off Andrew and back on himself, even if it meant McKay would poke him some more about being unhappy.
"No, you're not," McKay denied, his voice strangely cold and earnest. "You're miserable and you're lonely and you're lying to yourself. I know what that's like, Colonel. I also know that it doesn't have to be this way for you."
He sounded so unlike the Rodney McKay John knew, that John had problems bringing the two versions of McKay in sync. Which was okay, really. It only seemed to prove John right. The Rodney of his own reality and this McKay here were as different as the general … Governor … and himself were. This McKay here was obviously very in love with his husband while John's own version of Rodney McKay was pining after Jennifer Keller. It didn't get much more different. Why wouldn't McKay just accept that a relationship other than friendship between John and Rodney was completely out of the question? Rodney was straight and all John would get if he actually hit on Rodney was a heartache and the humiliation of being turned down. Both things not very high on John's favorites list. Why wouldn't McKay leave the topic alone? It really made John quite angry.
"Dammit, would you give it a rest already? Stop pestering me, and find a way to get me back to my own … dimension or whatever. Since when have you become an oracle anyway? And what's with this grinning and being patient? You're not supposed to be patient. Rodney McKay and patient are mutually exclusive. When did you learn to be patient anyway?" John knew he had to sound like a lunatic but he didn't care. He wanted to go home, he wanted to be left alone, but most of all he wanted for McKay to stop talking about things John would rather forget. John was aware of the fact that he had just managed to make the word 'patient' sound like an insult, but he honestly didn't care. When the general, McKay and Andrew had asked to speak with him, John sure as hell hadn't thought McKay would take his whole emotional life apart. He had no right. No right at all to say what he had said. It was none of McKay's damn business!
But McKay didn't seem to care. He just laughed – again. "Oh I don't know, maybe living with an Air Force flyboy with a protective streak and a tendency to go on suicide missions did that to me. Or the fact that I raised a child with said man. In a war-zone of all places," McKay answered and there was something in his voice that spoke about how hard won this patience of his really was.
"You know what? I don't care what you've done or how you did it. I don't care if you won half a dozen of Nobel Prizes or this other version of me gets to be the fucking President. All I want to do is go home and if you don't have any more questions for me – real questions – then I'd like to go. Let security bring me to my room, holding cell, whatever. I don't care. But I'm not going to talk about my private life any more. It's none of your business and I have no idea why the hell you insist to poke around in it. Is that some new standard procedure or are you some kind of pervert? Do you get off on hearing what life is like for other versions of yourself and your oh so perfect general?" John knew he was ranting, talking himself into a rage but he couldn't help it. He felt so out of it, so vulnerable and somehow … exposed. The hologram-McKay hadn't evoked those feelings in John at all. Maybe because he was a hologram and couldn't pry. Maybe because Rodney, his Rodney would never in a million years turn John's life inside out. Whatever it had been, somehow John had liked it better when he had been alone with the hologram. This man sitting across from him got way too far under his skin.
A thoughtful look crossed McKay's face. "Hm," he said, sounding so much like John's own version of Rodney that John's heart constricted painfully. His own Rodney was so ar away. Out of reach for John and John missed him quite a bit. Pushing that thought aside, John turned his attention back to the man sitting across from him. "I can see how you could get that impression," McKay admitted to John's great surprise. "Usually we don't 'poke around' as you put it, in our guest's personal life. I guess what I did can seem patronizing and rude. The way I argued my point. And still, I am sure it was – and is – the right thing to do. You and your Doctor McKay belong together; I know that for a fact. Because if I've learned one thing from our various other-dimensional visitors, it is that John Shepard and Rodney McKay are supposed to be a couple." He looked smug now. "Evidence doesn't lie."
"Other-dimensional visitors? Plural?" John asked, dumbfounded. "How many visitors did you have until now?" There was a funny feeling creeping up his spine and unease settled into the pit of John's stomach. This universe … dimension … whatever it was, was a bit more different than he had thought.
"All in all, you are the third John Sheppard and we had two other versions of me. One Samantha Carter and then there was the Elizabeth we found in a stasis chamber. But she didn't say anything at all about her John and Rodney dating so this doesn't count," McKay answered cheerfully.
John just stared at him for a moment. They had this many visitors from other dimensions? Why the hell was he still sitting here in this conference room then? If they had done this five times before already, sending him back home should be a piece of cake, right?
As if McKay had read his mind, he said, "Ah, no, there is no easy way to get you back home so you better settle in and make yourself comfortable. I'll have you brought to your quarters and I'll talk to John and Evan about getting you on a gate team – eventually. If I'm right with my suspicions, you will be here for a while, yet. And as far as we know, none of you came here of your own volition or with malicious intentions. I'm sure we can find something to do for you. One more Sheppard is always helpful," McKay said and stood.
John watched in horror as he walked over to the door and belatedly called him back. "Wait! What the hell do you mean that you think I will be here for a while? Why can't you just send me back like you sent back the others? And what do you mean with 'suspicions'? What happened to science? What happened to evidence instead of guessing? This is my life we're talking about here!" John snapped, panicking. What McKay said didn't make much sense, but he didn't want to be stuck in this strange place. He wanted to go home.
McKay grinned and suddenly looked years younger. "Oh, but we didn't send them back. There is no way to determine which time and dimension you are from. Other than the Dr. Sheppard who came here because of the matter bridge, the other 'visitors' appeared much like you did – out of nowhere. Sam suddenly entered the lab, one version of me we found at the alpha site waiting for us, another one stepped thought the Stargate, just like you. Oh and then there was a John Sheppard we found unconscious in botany one day. We didn't figure out a way to send them back because, as I said, there is no telling where exactly they came from. They simply vanished again one day. Either went to bed and were found missing the next morning or stepped though the gate with their team and never appeared on the other side. I have a theory that they were here for a purpose and once that purpose was fulfilled, they went back to where they belonged. You know, sometimes I feel like the universe somehow decided to send us all the muck-ups. John used to compare it to boot camp," McKay grinned again.
"We're the training academy and you're here to stay until you get it right. Whatever you are supposed to get right," he shrugged, turning to leave once more. "And by the way you've been behaving, I figured you've got a long stay ahead of you. Have a nice day, Colonel." With that he stepped through the door and was gone. John stared after him – dumbfounded.
oooooOooooo
"Geez, Rodney, another one?" General John Sheppard said to his husband the moment he entered their quarters.
"Hm, yeah. I wondered about that, too. It seems that my theory might be right after all – they are here for some strange reason. I mean, think about it. Just when we noticed a change in their behavior, they vanished again. It's just weird that he's seen Andy this time. The last times, when it was another version of either of us, Andy never was around or was too young to remember. He never really go to talk to them. This John Sheppard was the first one who has actually interacted with Andy. That's new. Maybe we're wrong after all. Maybe this is all coincidence. Or we're really supposed to play matchmaker for all the other versions of ourselves, who were not smart enough to get together on their own. Why they're not showing up in pairs then, though, I don't know," Rodney said and peeled off his clothes slowly.
"Maybe we only get the one who's not ready to give the relationship a try?" John said, warming to the idea of him and Rodney playing multi-dimensional matchmakers for their other selves. "Maybe we're just so perfect for showing them how it's supposed to be that we were chosen?" John went on and Rodney looked at him skeptically.
"Yes, right. Because we are special," Rodney replied sarcastically, raising an eyebrow at John. "Your ego knows no bounds, does it, General Perfect?" Rodney was only clad in his underwear now, making his way slowly to the bathroom.
"Aww come on, Rodney," John whined. "It'd be so cool, you know? I mean think about it: you and me, the perfect example of how things were supposed to turn out. We're just … meant for each other," John drawled, grinning broadly. He loved the look it put on Rodney's face. Somewhere between exasperation and fondness.
"You know, you weren't actually supposed to figure that one out," a voice that sounded suspiciously like John's own suddenly said, pout clearly audible in it. Then, in a flash of blinding white light another John Sheppard appeared in the middle of the room, looking scarily young. In fact, he looked even younger than their other visitor, who had to be a good twenty-five years younger than they were.
"What the…" Rodney cursed and John took an involuntary step back.
"You … you're … me! And you're …" John stammered taken completely by surprise by their impromptu 'visit' of yet another version of him.
"Ascended, yes, who would have thought," the other John said and there was gentle amusement in his voice. "As it is, I've been ascended for a while and I thought since I can't do anything for my own universe and timeline, I could help a few other versions of me and," he turned to face Rodney who had hastily pulled some clothes back on, "you. You know, not all of … us were so smart or so lucky to get settled with each other. You are the best example of how exceptionally right things can go. That's why I sent you a few people who were in need of … enlightenment. I've done this in several other universes but the two of you have by far the best success rate, whether you know it or not," their visitor grinned and he sounded way too smug for John's liking.
Before he could say anything, however, Rodney beat him to it. "Wait, wait, you mean to tell us you actually are messing with the lives of … several versions of yourself and me? That you've decided you know what's good for them and you just … do what? Try to make them see reason? You make them strand in another time and reality until their mindset meets your approval? Just because you think that how it's supposed to be?" Rodney asked, sounding incredulous. Somehow he had sounded way more pleased with the idea when no-one had been there to actually confirm his suspicions.
Alternate John just raised his eyebrows at him in a questioning manner and asked, "What, you mean to tell me you don't think you're supposed to be together?"
"Um, not that's not what I was … I mean … you can't just … we're not a freak show! We're not … visual aids in your own private love 101 lesson. Life just doesn't work like that!" Rodney snapped and John thought that he might be overreacting a bit. Somehow the idea of helping other John Sheppards to see what they were missing out on sounded damn cool to him.
The other John shrugged easily. "For me, it does. I was bored. I needed something to do to pass the time until McKay arrives. So I thought I might as well help some other versions of us to get what I couldn't have. So far it's worked brilliantly. And I don't harm anyone. I've made sure of that."
"You were bored? What is this to you? A game? You're playing with people's lives here!" Rodney snapped and John considered to just lean back and enjoy the show between alternate John and Rodney. It was actually quite entertaining.
"I'm not playing with anyone. I give them time to reconsider their decisions. There's a difference. I don't force them into anything. I just give them a sense of what they could have if they just took the chance. And I'm also making sure they actually get the chance to … take the chance," he grinned and didn't look at all perturbed by Rodney's anger.
"But …" Rodney began again but was interrupted by the other John.
"No but. Don't act like you didn't enjoy the idea, Rodney. I know you better than that. And judging by the way you were treating the poor Colonel earlier, you enjoy it way more than you would actually admit. Come on. You like the idea of playing matchmaker. You liked to poke him, liked to push him into the direction of considering to get things on with his own Rodney. You told him you give phenomenal blowjobs, for fucks sake. What the hell is it with you pretending you didn't know exactly what you were doing? You figured out why I sent all those people here and you were enjoying yourself thoroughly while delivering the message," alternate John said and now it was John's turn to gasp and glare – at Rodney.
"You told the Colonel you give phenomenal blowjobs?" John asked, staring at his husband accusingly.
"Spectacular. I said I give spectacular blowjobs, but that's beside the point. Yes, alright, I like the idea of them getting together but …"
"No, enough of that. I'll leave the Colonel in your capable hands now and I'll try not to send you any more of … us. Even though you really do have the best success rate. I'll just have to find another universe that has that loving family vibe going on. Maybe the one where John and Rodney just had their second child. She's a real cutie. You take care of the Colonel, I'll do the rest. So long," with that, the alternate John vanished in a burst of bright light.
John and Rodney just stared.
oooooOooooo
Blue. His fucking room was blue. Colonel John Sheppard hadn't known that Atlantis' quarters came in any other color that the strange neutral/I hues that he'd seen in all of his universe's rooms. Well, besides the stained glass, that was colorful enough to be sure. But now this. All this blue.
Blue like the event horizon of an engaged Stargate. Blue like Rodney's eyes. Blue like the eyes he'd seen in Andrew's face. Rodney's eyes in the boy … man's face. Because he was Rodney's son. Rodney's and John's son. A mix between him and Rodney. Rodney and John were lovers. More than just lovers. They were married. They loved each other. And this Rodney was convinced that he and John were supposed to be, no matter in which dimension. But was he right? Was being with Rodney worth the risk? Would John risk his career, his home, life in Atlantis for just the slim chance of finding … what exactly? Love? Happiness? What?
John had always thought he wasn't missing much. Sure, he didn't have a partner, but life in Pegasus was still damn awesome. If one didn't count the Wraith attacks and the problems they'd had with the Genii. But all in all. He was in another galaxy, living in the long lost city of the Ancients, a city that whispered to him, that made him feel welcomed and at home. With people he could call friends, the best friends he'd had in a while. Would it really pay off to risk all that for the offhand chance that Rodney and he were 'meant to be'?
And then what? What if it really worked out between Rodney and him? What then? Settle down? John had no idea how the John and Rodney of this universe had managed to be together, to marry and have a child together without getting John court-martialled. In fact, they had promoted him to General. John really doubted he'd see the day he would make it to General himself. Not that it had been a goal in the first place. The thought of having what the John and Rodney of this dimension shared – marriage, family – sent a shiver down John's spine.
He'd been married once and it hadn't worked out between Nancy and him, despite her knowing full well that John wasn't … completely straight and only married her because it was expected of him. After the divorce John had been so sure that he'd never marry again, wouldn't live a lie again. Now, thinking about Andrew, thinking about the love that shone so blatantly from both McKay's and the general's eyes, love for each other, love for their son, now John might reconsider. Marrying Rodney might not be a pretense after all.
"I must be going out of my mind!" John said aloud, rubbing his hands over his face tiredly. "Here I am, in strange universe, ahead of my own timeline and thinking about hitting on my best friend. My buddy. Someone who is in love with Jennifer Keller. Someone who is supposedly straight and only interested in blondes. And I'm neither female nor blond. I must be crazy to even think about Rodney in that way. And now I'm also talking to myself. Great, just great. You're losing it, Sheppard, Well done! You're completely nuts!"
At this moment the door chime rang, startling him out of his tirade. Slowly, John went over to open the door, wondering if they were coming to put him into a holding cell after all. Not that he'd blame them, he'd behaved atrociously. To his great surprise, it was Andrew, who was waiting in front of his door.
"May I come in?" he asked and his voice was so neutral, so completely unreadable it unnerved John a bit.
"Yes, of course," John replied and stepped aside, allowing Andrew to enter the room. John didn't know what Andrew wanted but his anger seemed gone at least and John was actually curious to get to know what had brought the young man to his door.
John didn't have to wait for very long since the moment the door slid shut, Andrew said, "I came to apologize to you, sir" looking rather young and somehow vulnerable. His indifferent mask was slipping slightly but John could see he did his best to not give any of his emotions away.
Something in John's gut clenched. Andrew had apparently decided that John was his superior, no matter that he was from another universe. He was paying John respect John was pretty sure he didn't deserve after the scene from earlier. He sure as hell hadn't acted like a commanding officer should act. John had reacted emotionally and had deliberately said those things to hurt Andrew. Cursing inwardly, John took a deep breath and gestured over to the couch, saying, "Come on, let's have a seat."
"I would prefer to stand, if that is acceptable, sir," Andrew replied and looked directly at John, his back stiff. It made John want to snap an 'at ease' at him, but that would send the wrong message. John wasn't this boy's commanding officer, he wasn't in any position at all to give him orders.
John rubbed his forehead, suppressing a sigh. He held Andrew's gaze for a moment, unsure how to go on now, what to do, what to say. John finally settled on asking, "Why are you doing this, Andrew? Why are you here? You owe me nothing. I'm not even from your own universe. What made you come here? Did your fathers send you? Because I want you to know that there is nothing you need to apologize for. I've been rude to you and you have every right to be angry. In fact, that was what I was going for and if anyone should apologize, it should be me. I'm sorry for what I said. I had no right to belittle you or your fathers in that way. It was a cruel thing to say and I apologize," John said and something akin to surprise rushed over Andrew's face before it turned blank again.
"With all due respect, sir, you are wrong. The fact that you are not from my universe does not give me the right to talk to you the way I did. You are still a higher ranking officer. You are the military leader of the Atlantis of your universe. I owe you the same respect I owe my father or Colonel Lorne. I should have had myself better under control. Reacting the way I did was unprofessional behavior and I apologize. I didn't mean any disrespect, sir," Andrew said, still staring straight ahead, his whole posture one of stoic military obedience.
John sighed. Andrew was way more stubborn that he had given him credit for. Stubborn and proud. Determined.
And so damn young.
John closed his eyes briefly, trying to stay calm. Andrew was getting under his skin without even trying to. There was something in those damn blue eyes that made John's chest ache and his gut tie up in knots.
Looking at Andrew again, a strange sense of pride washed over John. Pride of the sort a father might feel for his son. There was this young man, standing in John's borrowed quarters, posture stiff and face carefully blank, who had come to apologize to John. It took a lot of guts to do what Andrew had done, John knew that. Andrew had come to John even though John had been the one to act out of turn. What Andrew had done showed a lot of inner strength and determination and John suddenly saw in him what McKay had described earlier.
Young, but mature. Highly intelligent and fiercely loyal. Andrew hadn't just defended his parents earlier in that conference room, he had reacted to what he viewed as a wrongdoing on John's part on a more basic level. John had no doubts that he would have defended a team member or friend just as fiercely as he had defended his family.
He as a good boy … man, dammit! A good man. Someone to trust and rely on. Someone who deserved respect. Someone who was deserving of the truth, maybe.
Taking a deep breath, John weighed his options.
"I envy them," John finally said and a look of surprise and confusion rushed over Andrew's face.
"Sir?" he asked, clearly unsure what to say to that.
"Your parents. I envy then. For what they have together. For finding love. For having you. Especially for having you. You're … you're what I never thought I could have. No, what I most likely will never have. You're his son. You're the son of the John Sheppard of this universe. I never thought I would have children, you know? I … I'm really not that interested in women and the marriage I had failed horribly. But here you are, rubbing it in that in another dimension I have a son with my best friend. With the person I trust most in my life. Isn't that ironic?" John knew he sounded bitter now, but the memories of how the hologram of his Rodney had told him about Rodney marrying Jennifer were still as fresh in his mind as if it had been yesterday. And now his Rodney was showing interest in her in his own timeline as well. Looked like it was meant to be, John or no John.
How did you beat destiny?
The point was, you didn't. John knew that. There was nothing he could do if Rodney wanted Jennifer and she wanted him. Nothing at all. Maybe those two really were supposed to be together after all. And if that was the case, then this whole trip to the alternate universe was just one big exercise in torturing John. And wasn't that a lovely thought?
"I do not see any irony in marrying your best friend, sir. Marriages seem to last the longest if the partners are not only lovers but friends as well. It does make sense. Here in Pegasus spouses are chosen for different reasons, not just love. Sometimes it's friendship and the desire to unite two families. Sometimes it's to better care for the best friend's widow and kid. And yes, sometimes it's even about the potential spouse being a good hunter or skilled negotiator or some other desirable trait. People have adapted their lives to living with the threat of a culling. Their views of marriage and family are different than yours," Andrew concluded. "And since I've been raised in Pegasus – by two fathers – my views of love and marriage might be very different from yours as well, sir. I am sorry if I make you uncomfortable, sir, even though I do not understand how you can say that you envy my parents when you talk about your own Doctor McKay the way you did. From what you said earlier today, it did not seem that you are very close, sir." Andrew's voice held a strange undertone and John got the feeling that he wanted to talk, wanted to really talk to him, but didn't know how to ask.
"Can't you just call me 'John' please?" John asked him, hoping Andrew would finally quit being a textbook soldier and start being himself. John had the feeling he could come to really, really like Andrew if he'd be given the chance to see the young man as he really was.
"Sir?" Andrew asked again and John sighed and said patiently, "I would like for you to stop calling me 'sir' and call me 'John'. I'm really not your superior, or commanding officer. I'm just a visitor who happens to have a rank as well. I'd like to talk to Andrew for a moment, and not to the Lieutenant. You think that's possible? Would you feel better of you called me something entirely else? You call him 'dad', don't you?"
"I … Yes, I do. And … John is acceptable, if you are sure you want me to call you that, sir," came the hesitant answer.
"Yes, I'm sure," John replied, gesturing over to the couch again. "Would you like to sit with me now? I think we have some things to talk about. I'd like to tell you about my own Rodney and maybe you can tell me a bit about yourself and your parents. I'm stuck here for a while and I'd like to," John shrugged his shoulder self-consciously, resisting the urge to rub his neck, "… you know, maybe not spend the time locked up in a cell after all."
Something was clearly going on in the kid's head. It looked like Andrew was debating with himself what to do. John hoped he'd get his chance at making peace with him. As John watched, Andrew took a step towards the couch, sitting down slowly. After a while of just studying John, he finally stuck out his hand to John and said, "Maybe we should start over. Hi, I'm Andrew. It's nice to meet you. You look like a younger version of my dad. Would you like to tell me about your home?"
Relief, mixed with pride rushed through John as he took the offered hand. Andrew wanted to start over. He was being the better man and gave John a chance to get it right this time. He was willing to forgive John's atrocious behavior and allow him to get to know each other. This was such a huge gift. Maybe Andrew had realized that John wasn't so different from his dad after all. Maybe John was a curious to get to know him, as John was about discovering the man Andrew was. John released a breath he hadn't been aware he was holding and grinned at Andrew, saying, "Hi Andrew. I'm John Sheppard and I believe I'm another version of your dad, actually. Kinda cool, huh? And yes, I'd definitely like to tell you about my Atlantis, if you tell me about yours. There are quite a few differences, I think," he gestured at the walls. "Who's your interior designer? Our walls are certainly not blue."
Andrew laughed at him. "I have no idea why our walls are blue but as far as I know, it's always been like that. I once overheard dad say that the color reminds him of my pa's eyes. He can be such a romantic. It's embarrassing. No, really, completely sappy." Andrew said, mischief dancing in his eyes and John got the feeling he was being led on.
"Oh is he now?" John asked and raised an eyebrow at his alternate version's son. "I wonder how you made it to that age without driving your parents insane or getting yourself killed," John teased, warming up to the open young man who was sitting beside him. It seemed that when Andrew offered a start-over, he actually meant it and John was thankful for that. He had a feeling that he'd been missing out on a lot of they hadn't found a truce.
As John watched, something flittered over Andrew's face. "I almost died, once," he finally said. "I had accidentally switched on some Ancient gadget and it damaged my nervous system. Pa … he fixed it, so they could fix me. He … he almost died as well, in the process. He later said that he'd rather die himself than let me die. I … I know both of them would … you know," he broke off, but John knew what he meant to say.
Thinking about his friends, his team, people he considered his family, John knew he was just the same. He'd die for them, if it meant they would be safe. That the alternate versions of himself and Rodney felt that way about their son wasn't a surprise at all.
"Yeah," John agreed. "I actually do know exactly what that feels like. I've had my share of near suicide missions and it's pure luck I'm still alive. My team actually had to kill me once," John said and looked at Andrew again. The young man smiled at him, encouraging John with a small nod to go on.
Settling more comfortable into the cushions of the couch, John prepared to share a few stories. He still wanted to go home, he still missed his home and his Atlantis, but he also realized, that his situation could be a lot worse.
John had the feeling he had just found his first friend in this strange place that was not quite home.
oooooOooooo
John watched the rippling blue of the event horizon for a moment, thinking that even after stepping through this universe's version of a Stargate, the shade of blue still felt slightly off to him. Just like the coloring of the rooms, some things in this universe seemed to just have a slightly different hue than he was used to. It made John still feel as an outsider in this place every time anew. Even four and a half months into going out on missions with 'his' team – well, the team he commanded – it still felt somehow wrong and strange. He just didn't belong/i here. Sure, he had hand-picked the team he was leading, but they still didn't feel like they were his/I team. No, his team was waiting for him at home, probably worried sick by now. Surely he had been declared mission in action by now and Lorne had taken over the military lead of his Atlantis. Even though John didn't feel unwelcome in this universe, he still wanted to go home as soon as possible. He missed Teyla and Ronon, but most of all, he missed his own Rodney so damn much. By now John would give practically anything to just get back home and be able to talk to his universe's version of McKay again. To maybe even tell him how he felt. How he finally had admitted to himself that he felt. Dangerous or not, with every day he spent in the company of the McKay-Sheppard couple and Andrew, he felt himself wishing for the same things they had. He wanted to be with Rodney – if Rodney would have him.
Turing around to see if the team was ready, John was pleased to see that indeed all of them were geared up and just waiting for his sign. Smiling, John made a motion towards the 'gate and said, "Alight, let's go."
He stepped through the event horizon and …
…into the gate-room he thought he had just left. Only that this was the gate room of his/I Atlantis because there was Rodney, his Rodney, standing just a few feet away, glaring at John and looking like he had just stepped through the gate as well. Ronon and Teyla were standing nearby, waiting patiently.
Instantly, Rodney snapped at him, "That was uncalled for, Colonel. I am perfectly capable of stepping through the 'gate on my own. No need to push me the way you did. I'm not the one who was being late this time. In fact I told you that we should have come back hours ago. Are you trying to annoy me on purpose? Because I'll have you know, it worked quite well. You can count yourself lucky I didn't injure myself. I could have sprained an ankle." There was annoyance and sarcasm in his voice and to John he had never sounded better.
John didn't pay his words much attention, though, only vaguely aware of the fact that he had apparently returned not only to his universe, but at the very same moment he would have appeared if he had not landed himself someplace else. For them, he had never been missing. But John knew he had changed. He wasn't the same person anymore who had stepped out of the 'gate in the other universe all those months ago. After spending time with the other John and Rodney and most of all Andrew, John wouldn't let his chance at happiness with Rodney slip away. No matter what he had to do for it or how much they had to sneak around, he'd take the chance and hope fate would be gracious this time.
Grinning madly, John engulfed a startled Rodney in a hug, saying, "I missed you so damn much," just loud enough for Rodney to hear.
He'd have a lot to talk about, a lot to explain. Some things he'd tell, some things he wouldn't. There was no way to know in what way his own universe would develop and John was curious to see where they would end up at. But explanations could wait a little longer.
All that counted now was that he was back and maybe, somehow, he'd get to have what the other John and Rodney had, after all. Having Rodney and maybe even their own version of Andrew in his life would be worth every risk.
Epilogue:
When Rodney finally ascended – he didn't even need help from John he managed all on his own – John met with him in what looked like a Country- and Western-bar, Johnny Cash coming out of the juke-box. Sitting at the bar, John smiled at Rodney brightly the moment he spotted him.
Rodney walked over and leaned down to brush a quick kiss on John's lips, before he sat down beside him. John didn't get the chance to actually say anything to him though, since his lover dived head first into a tirade.
"I can't leave you alone for a moment, can I? What the hell have you done, huh? I should have known you'd mess up the universe, well several universes, if I'm not there to keep you in line. What were you thinking? No, no don't tell me because you clearly weren't thinking at all!" Rodney ranted and John grinned at him again, John had just known Rodney would have some choice words about John's activities since he had ascended.
"Well, of course I was thinking, Rodney," John drawled. "I was thinking that I was doing a good thing, giving other versions of us a chance at happiness. And I did pretty well I'd say," John replied, not bothered the least by Rodney's outburst.
"Well? You call that doing well?" Rodney asked, sounding incredulous and John laughed at him. He'd missed Rodney so damn much and having him close now was just wonderful – and torture at the same time. His nearness was distracting, but John knew they needed to talk first, before they could finally turn to more … pleasant activities later. So he just let Rodney talk, listening to him, enjoying the way Rodney's hands soared through the air. John didn't mind Rodney's sarcasm and his rant at all – in fact he had missed it quite a lot.
"Yes, Rodney, actually I do. I got them together, didn't I?" John asked, amusedly.
"As if that was hard," Rodney went on. "You were doing horribly. Seriously, have you ever heard of being subtle? It's no wonder some of them guessed what you were doing. You were being blatantly obvious. I mean, honestly, you sent a McKay and a Carter practically right after each other. And you really only let the Johns and Rodneys leave after they were ready to actively try and get together. Well, in Carter's case it was helping to get them together, but anyway. Did you really think they were that stupid not to see a pattern?" Rodney waved his hands about agitatedly, still glaring at John every once in a while.
"And what about that last Sheppard you sent to the ones who figured it out? The very first one who got to speak to their son Andrew? You had the uniform code revoked the day after you sent him back. Could you have been any more obvious? Or the one McKay you pretty much sent straight to the planet with the crazy natives that would make him be able to get pregnant and then you set up a scenario so they would have to stay overnight? He conceived the same night! How could you? The poor man was in shock when Carson told him. Not that Shepard was taking it any better. But why did you have to do this? They were a couple already. And then there is the incident with Carter. What the hell possessed you to take her out of her own universe in the middle of a corridor? If you had messed up your timing, putting her back too late, or if there had been any other problems, someone could have noticed her just vanishing in thin air…"
Clearly Rodney had much more to say and at one point John would happily let him rant on for hours, but not quite now. Now he needed Rodney, close, needed to feel him, taste him. So John just took Rodney's face between his hands and kissed him softly, shutting him up most effectively.
After a while John reluctantly ended the kiss but left his hands in Rodney's soft hair. "Rodney, relax. All went well. I got them together, some of them had children and they all lived happily ever after. You're just mad that you weren't here for the fun. But you can help me if you like. There are still countless Johns and Rodneys that need a push in the right direction. But first I want to peek in to the John you mentioned earlier. The last one I sent to the couple that guessed? I need to show you something." John grinned happily and grabbed Rodney's wrist, pulling him away with him.
oooooOooooo
Colonel John Sheppard was nervous. Ever since he'd returned from the alternate universe, he had wondered if this moment would ever come. When John had told Rodney about Andrew, John had never said, how exactly their alternate version had managed to have a child together just that some ancient gadget that had given them a baby somehow.
So the look of shocked disbelief on Rodney's face really didn't come as a surprise to John when he thrust the pregnancy test into his husband's hands.
"A pregnancy test? Oh, you've got to be kidding me! Very funny, John. Ha ha. Very funny. Now leave me alone. You and your stupid ideas. You're not helping, you know? I'm sure Jennifer can give me something for my upset stomach," Rodney fumed and tried to give John the test back.
"Not kidding, Rodney. I'm dead serious. You know that this other Rodney carried Andrew. And even though we never found that Ancient device that changed him, in our universe, something else could have changed you. You remember our little trip to the Retaf last month? We never figured out their 'gift'. Maybe it's nothing but …" John trailed off, hoping he was right, hoping Rodney was pregnant, too and soon they would have a child of their own.
Rodney had gone pale as a sheet. "But Jennifer would have found something, if I had grown … new organs, wouldn't she? No, no she might not f the growth was slow enough and I had now problems. Her voodoo only really detects stuff when I'm about to die. But … but this can't be happening. No. No way! I can't have a child. I'm a man. Men don't bear children that's just not possible," Rodney yelled, high pitched and panicked.
"As impossible as life-sucking space vampires and flying cities?" John asked amusedly and gave Rodney a little push in the direction of the bathroom. "Come on, Rodney. Humor me. Maybe it's nothing. Maybe it really is just a stomach bug. But what if it's not? It can't hurt to give the test a try, right? At least then we'll know."
Muttering under his breath about never having sex with John again and making sure that John never took another warm shower in his life, Rodney finally made his way to the bathroom.
John sat down on the couch, nervously. He was so excited. Now all that was needed was a little luck and for that small white display to change color. Shifting around on the couch, the next few minutes felt like the longest of John's life. Then, finally, a startled and somehow very nauseous looking Rodney appeared in the bathroom door.
He held the pregnancy test in his hands, showing it to John, with the words, "Here, what does that mean?" He sounded dazed, almost as if he couldn't believe what he was seeing. Which probably meant, the display had changed color after all and they would have a baby.
John smiled excitedly and took the test out of Rodney's hands. And yes, indeed, the display was colored a bright blue.
The End