"All I want is nothing more
To hear you knocking at my door
'Cause if I could see your face once more
I could die as a happy man I'm sure
When you said your last goodbye
I died a little bit inside
I lay in tears in bed all night
Alone without you by my side
But If you loved me
Why did you leave me
Take my body
Take my body
All I want is
All I need is
To find somebody
I'll find somebody" –Kodaline, All I Want.
~Supernatural~
"LAZARUS RISING (4x01)"
~May 5, 2008 [approximately 7:48 p.m.~
Shia sat by her husband's grave, staring blankly at the uneven cross. It's been two days since he was dragged to hell. Shia could still see the images of him crying out in pain. She could still see his eyes staring into nothing.
Sam kneeled down beside his sister in law, brushing loose strands of hair behind her ear. Sam was hurt by the passing of his brother. But he felt like it was ten times worst for Shia. She lost her husband, best friend, and father of her child. Sam watched Shia stare at Dean's grave with no emotion present on her face.
"Shia..." Sam said softly, his hand reaching down to grab hers. "Lynx is waiting in the car, we should get going."
Shia said nothing, she continued to stare at the fresh soil on the ground, knowing her husband was six feet under...it was unbearable. Talking to her was like talking to a brick wall.
"We need to go." Sam tried again. He gently placed both hands on her face, forcing her to look at him. "I'm going to find a way to bring Dean back. Don't worry. Okay?"
Shia said nothing. Instead she gave Sam a nod before getting up and walking to the impala.
Sam opened the passenger door for Shia, being as much of a gentlemen as possible. Shia gave him a small smile and shook her head, she opened the backseat door, climbing inside to seat next to her toddler.
Sam knew that she wasn't being rude by declining to sit by him. He knew that she wanted to be next to Lynx because she's the only piece of Dean she had left.
Watching Lynx interact with Shia, Sam felt a ping at his heart. All Dean talked about after Lynx was born was giving her the best life he could possibly give. Sam knew that Dean loved Shia and his child with everything he had.
Sam glanced at his niece once more, he could see his brother in her smile, her eyes, and her hair. He was determined to bring Dean back, no matter at what cost.
~Supernatural~
~June 17, 2008 (approximately 6:24 p.m.)~
"Mama." Lynx said, using her small body to climb on the couch to sit by her mother. Shia smiled at Lynx's effort to sit beside her. Lynx made her way on the couch but instead of sitting, she was standing beside her. Tugging on her mom's hair and giving drooled kisses on her cheeks while laughing at her own silliness.
"Oh, my silly girl." Shia mumbled as she pulled her daughter's small body in her arms.
"Shia?" a familiar, gruff voice called out.
"Yeah, dad?" Shia asked Bobby as she walked into the kitchen with Lynx in her arms.
"Sam's back."
There was a pause. Sam left weeks ago. He would only come back for a day or two, never stayed longer than that. Lynx wiggled out of her mother's grasp before wobbling over to the back door, only to see her Uncle Sam exiting his vehicle.
"Tuck Tam!" The toddler squealed. Her face expressing her excitement to see one of her uncles. "Tam! Tam! Tam!"
Sam opened the back door to greet his niece, she quickly wrapped herself around one of his legs.
"Lynx! I have something for you."
Sam picked up her up, and handed her a bag of cookies. "You're favorite, chocolate chip."
Shia smiled as she shook her head. "Great, now she's going to be up all night."
Sam made eye contact with the demi god. He gave her a small smile before handing his niece to her.
Lynx wrapped her small legs around Shia's waist, trying her hardest to open the bag of cookies.
"You're back." Shia said.
Sam nodded. "Yeah."
Shia looked from Sam to the ground. "How long? How long until you leave again?"
"Tonight. And I won't be back for a while. I'm close to figuring out a way to bring Dean back."
Shia placed Lynx in her high chair, placing a plate in front of the toddler. She grabbed the bag of cookies from Lynx's grasp, opening it up and pouring a few on the plate. "You know, Sam. She already lost her father. Now, you want her to lose her uncle? The only piece of her dad she has left."
"Yeah, and she's the only piece of my brother that I have. But what I'm doing is for her and you–"
"Dean's gone, Sam. You can't save him. He made the deal. He's a Winchester. No mercy in Hell. And there's no way a demon would cut you or me a deal."
Sam shook his head. "Don't talk that way in front of my niece." He spat.
"And don't use that tone with me." Shia said as she crossed her arms. "I'm just being honest. Don't do anything stupid."
They stared at each other for a moment. Sam walked pass Shia to his niece. He kissed the child on her forehead before grabbing his jacket and walking out the door. Shia followed after him.
"Where in the hell do you think you're going?" Shia asked, grabbing the younger Winchester by the arm. He jerked away from her touch.
"I'm going to work my ass off to bring my brother back. Not like you care. You never cared."
Slap.
Shia huffed, the angry in her eyes told Sam that he needed to watch his words. Shia's eyes then softened, realizing what she's done. "Sam– I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to–"
"Take care of Lynx. I'll see you soon." Sam leaned over to place a gentle kiss on his sister-in-law's cheek.
Shia watched Sam drive off in the Impala.
"Tam! Tam! Tam!" Lynx screamed, crying in her grandfather's arms. Shia turned around to see Bobby standing on the back porch with her toddler in his arms.
The demi god walked over and gently pulled the crying baby out of her dad's hold. "It's okay, bugga."
"You can't save everyone, Shy. You know that." Bobby told her, following behind her back into the house. The mother nodded.
"I know. But I owe it to my husband to keep his little brother safe."
"You owe it to him to take care of his child. Dean would want you to focus on being the best mother possible."
Shia looked at her child, who was crying in her arms. Shia sighed, walking upstairs to cuddle with her baby girl.
~Supernatural~
~September 19, 2008 (approximately 12:18 p.m.) BOBBY's HOUSE~
Shia's been working at a local diner/bar for about a month, and she was miserable. Drunk guys would hit on her. Jealous women would leave crappy tips. It took everything in her not to quit, she needed the money to make a better life for Lynx.
"I'm going to pick Lynx up from daycare. You, uh, you in the mood to make some lunch?" Bobby asked as he grabbed jacket. Shia gave him a soft smile before taking off her work apron.
"I can make a few sandwiches. Pick up some chips and cookies on your way back home."
Bobby nodded before leaving. The demi god could hear the engine to his truck starting before he drove off.
Shia sat down, she stared at her hands, then at her wedding finger. She still wore her ring. In her mind, she's still married to Dean Winchester. Until she finds it in her heart to move on, Dean will forever have her love.
Suddenly, one of the phones Bobby owned started to ring. Shia answered it. "Hello?"
"Hello? Shia?" A familiar gruff voice asked. Shia's eyes widen, her anger growing. "Babe? Is that you?"
"I don't know what you are. But if you call this house again...I will hunt you down and kill you myself." Shia slammed the phone down after she hung up. She was so pissed that shaper-shifters, demons, and ghouls thought it would hilarious to use her late husband as leverage against her.
Shia shook her head, trying really hard not to let her anger get the best of her. She went to the fridge and began to start on lunch.
~SPN~
Bobby ate his sandwich while the toddler threw her things on the floor. "Lynx, if you don't eat your food like yer 'pose to Imma wear your hiney out." Bobby scolded. The 16 month old toddler looked at her grandfather before licking the pudding off her hands. Bobby proudly smirked at his parenting skills. He wasn't all that great with babies at first. All he ever raised was kids from age seven and up. He didn't know how to deal with a tiny human that didn't know how to take care of themselves.
Just like earlier, his phone started to ring. Bobby got up and answered it.
"Hello," the old hunter asked.
"Bobby? Oh thank God."
The familiar voice had Bobby stand still. He was frozen in his spot. "Who is this?" He said, sternly.
"Bobby, listen to me." "Dean" said with urgency.
"This ain't funny. Call again, I'll kill ya." The older hunter hung up the phone, huffing at the nerve of some low level demon or whatever it was.
Shia walked in the kitchen, freshly out of the shower. Lynx got happy at the sight of her mother. "Ma meee."
"Hey baby," Shia greeted. She picked up the toddler, snuggling at her neck, making the child giggle. "You are so dirty. Let's get you cleaned up." The mother turned to Bobby. Instantly taking a note of his discomfort. "Dad, what's wrong?"
"Something called me...sounding like Dean?"
Shia's face hardened. "I got a call like that fifteen minutes ago."
"If it calls again, I'm going after it."
Shia smirked coldly as she placed Lynx in the sink, getting ready to wash her up. "Hell, count me in."
~SPN~
Shia was upstairs, attempting to get Lynx to take a nap. Unfortunately, the toddler wasn't budging.
"Lynx, nap time."
"No." The baby whines. "No nap!"
"Lynx Winchester, it's nearly 3:00, it's time for your thirty minute nap."
"No, mamaaa," Lynx laid down on the floor, slamming her fist against the wooden floor. She was throwing a fit.
Shia rolled her eyes and shook her head. "I am not kidding around with you today, little Dean! Why you gotta act like your daddy?"
~SPN~
Bobby was in his study room, reading up some information on some activity he's been documenting. He heard a bang sound coming from upstairs, he sighed. "Lynx must be having one of her tantrums today."
Suddenly, there was a pounding on the backdoor, Bobby looked at the time before getting up to see who was visiting him today. But when he opened it, he was in for a surprise.
On the doorstep was Dean, looking winded and apprehensive. He smiled cautiously. Bobby looked at him suspiciously.
"Surprise." Dean said, with a small grin on his face.
"I, I don't..." Bobby stuttered.
"Yeah, me neither," Dean commented as he walked through the door, inviting himself in. "But here I am."
Behind his back, Bobby took a silver knife. As Dean approached, Bobby lunged forward and slashed at him. Dean grabbed his arm and twisted it around; Bobby broke the grip and backhanded him in the face.
"Bobby! It's me!" Dean yelled, trying to get the older hunter to understand.
"My ass!" Bobby retorted.
Dean shoved a chair between himself and Bobby while his hands were held out. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait! Your name is Robert Steven Singer. You became a hunter after your wife got possessed, and... you're about the closest thing I have to a father. Bobby. It's me."
Bobby lowered the knife as he stepped forward slowly. He placed a hand gently on Dean's shoulder. Suddenly he slashed again, but Dean quickly subdued and disarmed him.
"I am not a shapeshifter!"
"Then you're a Revenant!" Bobby shouted. Shia could hear the commotion downstairs. She looked at her daughter, and placed her in the crib, ignoring her child's protest against it. She slowly made her way downstairs, attempting to not make any noise.
Dean shoved Bobby away, having taken the knife. He held it out in front of him.
"Alright. If I was either, could I do this – with a silver knife?" Dean rolled up his left sleeve, and, grimaced, sliced his arm above the elbow with the knife. A line of blood appeared.
Bobby was starting to believe it. "Dean?"
"That's what I've been trying to tell you." Bobby broke, grabbing Dean in for a tight hug. Dean returned the hug with enthusiasm, relief on his face. They pull apart.
"It's... It's good to see you, boy."
"Yeah, you too."
Shia heard the conversation, she couldn't believe what she was hearing. She quickly pulled out her gun.
"Yeah, you too." Dean said.
"But... how did you bust out?"
"I don't know. I just, uh, I just woke up in a pine box..." Suddenly, Bobby splashed water in Dean's face. Dean paused, spitting the water out.
"I'm not a demon either, you know."
"Sorry. Can't be too careful." Bobby said, slightly grinning.
Shia appeared behind Dean, she cocked her gun. "Then you're something stronger than a demon."
Dean froze. Her voice crept against his skin, giving him goosebumps. He turned around slowly. And seeing her again, was like seeing her for the first time. Her umber skin, her black hair, her plump lips, her brown eyes.
"Shy...it's me."
"Yeah, right," Shia scoffed. Her eyes were trained on the man in front of her.
"It's me...your name is Shia Shar–"
"Everyone knows that."
Dean nodded, he knew that he'd have to dig deeper for her to believe him. "There are seven reasons why I love you. One, your loyalty to me. Two, your smile could make my day a hundred times better. Three, you are the best mother to our child. Four, you fight for what's right and it doesn't matter if I agree with you or not. Five, your cooking is the best. Six, you're the strongest woman on this planet. Seven,–"
"We go together like peas and carrots." The couple said in unison. Shia dropped her gun and ran into his arms. He held onto her, tightening the embrace he had her in. Shia pulled away from him, staring into his emerald eyes. She suddenly pressed her lips to his, just to make sure this was real.
And it was.
"Okay, okay, that's enough." Bobby said, walking past the two.
~Supernatural~
They go further into the house, Dean continued to wipe his face with a towel.
"You being back...that don't make a lick of sense."
"Yeah. Yeah, you're preachin' to the choir." Dean commented.
"Dean. Your chest was ribbons, your insides were slop." Bobby tried explaining to him.
"Bobby's right." Shia stated, coming into the room with a fresh sandwich made for Dean. "You've been buried four months. Even if you could slip out of hell and back into your meat suit -"
"I know, I should look like a Thriller video reject."
"What do you remember?" Bobby asked, out of curiosity.
"Not much. I remember I was a Hellhound's chew toy, and then... lights out. Then I come to six feet under, that was it." Dean told the older hunter. Shia stared at her husband, not really sure but something felt off. It was him, but something was wrong.
Bobby sat at his desk, trying to figure out what could possibly be going on. "Sam's number's not working. He's, uh... he's not..."
"Oh, he's alive. As far as we know."
"Good... Wait, what do you mean, as far as y'all know?"
Bobby shrugged. "I haven't talked to him for months." Dean looked at Shia. She shook her head.
"You're kidding, you just let him go off by himself?"
"He was dead set on it, Dean. Your brother is hard-headed. He doesn't listen."
"Bobby, you should've been looking after him. Shia, I thought I told you to keep him safe."
"Keep him safe?! Dean, he's a grown man! I have a child to look after! Our child! Remember? What? Now, you want me to be a mommy to grown ass kid brother?" Before Dean could say anything, Shia walked off, making her way upstairs to check on her daughter.
"Things between them haven't been the best." Bobby explained. "I tried. These last months haven't been exactly easy, you know. For him, for her, or me. We had to bury you."
"Why did you bury me, anyway?"
"I wanted you salted and burned. Usual drill. But... Sam wouldn't have it."
"Well, I'm glad he won that one." Dean said, relieved.
"He said you'd need a body when he got you back home somehow. That's about all he said. Shia thought the kid was being reckless."
Dean was suspicious of Sam. He was starting to think his baby brother sold his soul for his freedom. "What do you mean?"
"He was quiet. Real quiet. And then he just took off. After, that last fight with Shia, he went away. Wouldn't return my calls. I tried to find him, but he didn't want to be found."
"Oh, dammit, Sammy."
"What?" Bobby asked.
"Oh, he got me home okay. But whatever he did, it is bad mojo."
"What makes you so sure?"
"You should have seen the grave site. It was like a nuke went off. And then there was this... this force, this presence, I don't know, but it, it blew past me at a fill-up joint. And then this." Dean took off his jacket, pulling up his sleeve to reveal the brand.
Bobby stared at the brand, standing up from his seat. "What in the hell?"
"It was like a demon just yanked me out. Or rode me out."
"But why?" Bobby asked.
"To hold up their end of the bargain."
"You think Sam made a deal."
"It's what I would have done." Dean explained, accusing his brother of reckless living.
~SUPERNATURAL~
"I'm going to try another number," Dean said, referring to his method of finding Sam's whereabouts. "The kid got some tricks up his sleeves but he can't hide from me."
"Nanas!" Dean heard a small voice squeal. Dean froze, he's heard that voice before. "Nanas!"
"Yeah. Yeah. I know it's snack time!" The returned hunter heard his wife say.
"Nanas!"
Dean turned around to see Shia walking his way with a toddler in her arms. Dean couldn't believe his eyes. It was Lynx, yes, but she looked so different. Her curly hair was past her ears, her eyes was the same color as his, she was so much bigger than he remembered.
"Chunky monkey?"
Lynx stared at the man in front of her, she knew who he was, she remembered him. Shia made sure she knew what her late dad looked like. "Hey, sweet pumpkin. It's me, it's daddy."
Lynx looked at her mom, sort of asking for confirmation. Shia smiled at the toddler, knowing what her child was thinking, she nodded at her. "There's your daddy, Lyn."
Dean's eyes never left his daughter's. Lynx wiggled out of her mother's arms, wobbling her way over to Dean. She looked up to him, and smiled. "Dada!" She squealed before hugging his legs.
Dean's heart melted, he didn't hesitate picking her up. Holding his child close was a different feeling than seeing his wife again. Lynx was his blood, a literal part of him. "Lynx Winchester, you're growing up on daddy. I told you not to do that." Dean quickly made raspberry noises against the toddler's neck, causing her to throw her little head back in laughter.
"Sweet pea, it's time for a snack." Shia reminded the little girl. Lynx was still giggling, but her ears perked at the mention of food.
"Nanas!"
"Nanas?" Dean asked his wife. Shia grinned, taking Lynx out of Dean's grasp.
"Bananas, Dean. Your daughter has an appetite for bananas. It's her favorite snack."
"Oh. Chunky Monkey has a favorite food. You guys get a snack. I need to make some more calls, I'll join you two in a minute."
Shia nodded before making her way into the kitchen with a hungry toddler.
~SUPERNATURAL~
September, 20, 2008 (approximately 2:40 p.m.) BOBBY's HOUSE -DAY
Dean was on the phone, he was confident with this call. He's got his brother in a box. "Yeah, hi, I have a cell phone account with you guys, and uh, I lost my phone. I was wondering if you could turn the GPS on for me. Yeah. Name's Wedge Antilles. Social is 2-4-7-4. Thank you." Dean hung up the phone and crossed to a laptop on the table beside him.
"How'd you know he'd use that name?" Bobby asked.
"You kiddin' me? What don't I know about that kid?" Was Dean's reply. The laptop was open to a web browser; Dean typed in the address for "Arc Mobile". Dean picked up one of the many empty liquor bottles scattered around. "Hey, Bobby? What's the deal with the liquor store? What, are your parents out of town or something?"
"Like I said. Last few months ain't been all that easy." Bobby said.
Dean held the older hunter's gaze for a moment. "Right." Dean looked the other room to see Lynx being read to by Shia. "You know, uh, Bobby...thank you, for keeping them with you."
Bobby scoffed, "that woman in there is my daughter. And that baby means the world to me. To all of us."
"She didn't drink, did she?"
Bobby shook his head. "She couldn't drink. Lynx still drinks her breast milk. But she was quiet, real quiet."
The laptop beeped; the display showed a city map with a blue arrow pointing to a star. The locator read:
Phone Location:
263 Adams Road
Pontiac, Illinois.
"Sam's in Pontiac, Illinois." Dean announced to the two hunters near him.
"Right near where you were planted." Shia said, closing Lynx's book. She picked up her daughter, who laid her head on her mother shoulder.
"Right where I popped up. Hell of a coincidence, don't you think?"
"Yeah, so, what do we do now?" Shia asked.
"We go get him."
"We ain't gonna all fit in my truck. Especially with Lyn's booster seat." Bobby said, standing beside Shia.
Shia nodded, trying to think. "Well, we'll take that bigger truck you've been working on."
"It ain't ready yet."
"Then go get it ready. I'm gonna pack a bag for lil Winchester here."
Shia walked off. The men watched her as she left the room. Dean turned to Bobby. "So, uh, need help looking at the truck?"
"C'mon, boy," Bobby huffed, making his way outside.
~SUPERNATURAL~
ASTORIA MOTEL – NIGHT
Dean and Bobby walked down a dingy hallway. Shia followed behind them with a sleeping Lynx in her arms. Dean knocked on a door with the number 207 inside a red heart.
The door was opened by an attractive woman with dark hair, wearing only a tank top and underwear. She looked at them expectantly.
"So where is it?"
Dean looked at Bobby, confused. He turned around to look at Shia, she shrugged. "Where's what?"
"The pizza... that takes two guys, a chick, and –Is that a baby?"
Dean looked flustered, very embarrassed. "I think we got the wrong room."
Sam stepped into the light. He was grim and focused, and wore a grey t-shirt and jeans.
"Hey, is..." Sam stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Dean. He swallowed, shocked, his eyes flicking between Dean, Bobby, and Shia.
Dean quietly said, with much feeling, "Heya, Sammy."
Sam was silent. Dean stepped into the room, ignoring the girl who asked about the pizza, she stepped aside to let him in. As Dean got close, Sam pulled a knife and lunged at Dean. The girl screamed; Dean blocked Sam's attack and Bobby pulled Sam off, gripping him around the shoulders. Sam struggled.
"Who are you?!" Sam shouted.
"Like you didn't do this?!" Dean retorted.
"Do what?!" Sam asked.
"It's him, Sam." Shia said in a hushed tone.
"It's him. I've been through this already, it's really him." Bobby continued to say for Shia.
San stared at Dean as the struggle slowly goes out of his body. "What..."
Dean advanced cautiously, staring at Sam. "I know. I look fantastic, huh?" Bobby let go of Sam, who looked on the verge of tears as he stepped forward and pulled Dean into a desperate hug. They embrace for several seconds, heavy with emotion, as Bobby looked on with tears in his eyes. Shia smiled softly at the reunion, brushing her fingers through Lynx's curly hair, trying to keep the child asleep. Luckily, the baby was a heavy sleeper.
Sam pushed Dean back to arm's length. The pizza girl was looking on, looking confused.
"So are you two like... together?" She asked.
Sam looked like he's just remembered that she was there. "What? No. No. He's my brother."
"Uh... got it. I... I guess. Look, I should probably go."
"Yeah. Yeah, that's probably a good idea. Sorry." Sam agreed.
~MOTEL ROOM – NIGHT~
Sam, now wearing a white button-down, opened the door to let the pizza girl, now dressed in an adorable blue plaid shirt, out.
"So, call me," she said.
"Yeah. Yeah, sure thing, Kathy." Sam said with a unsure smile.
The pizza girl looked disappointed. "Kristy," she corrected him.
"Right." Sam said with a slight nod.
Before she could leave, Shia stopped her. "Hey, do I know you?"
For a millisecond, Kristy looked worried. "Uh, no. But, um, cute kid you got there." She left after that.
Sam came back into the room after being in the bathroom, he sat down on the bed. Dean was standing above him, arms crossed. All three of the hunters are looking at Sam suspiciously.
"So tell me, what'd it cost?" Dean asked, not wanting to beat around the bush.
Sam smiled cockily, "The girl? I don't pay, Dean."
Dean has a stern look on his face. "That's not funny, Sam. To bring me back. What'd it cost? Was it just your soul, or was it something worse?"
"You think I made a deal?"
"That's exactly what we think." Bobby answered for all of them.
"Well, I didn't."
Dean eyed Sam intensely. "Don't lie to me."
"I'm not lying."
Dean advanced on his brother. "So what now, I'm off the hook and you're on, is that it? You're some demon's bitch-boy? I didn't want to be saved like this."
Sam stood up, angrily. "Look, Dean, I wish I had done it, all right?"
Dean grabbed Sam by the front of his shirt. "There's no other way that this could have gone down. Now tell the truth!"
The younger hunter broke away from his brother's grip. "I tried everything. That's the truth. I tried opening the Devil's Gate. Hell, I tried to bargain, Dean, but no demon would deal, all right? You were rotting in Hell for months. For months, and I couldn't stop it. So I'm sorry it wasn't me, all right? Dean, I'm sorry."
Dean believed him. "It's okay, Sammy. You don't have to apologize, I believe you."
"Don't get me wrong, I'm gladdened that Sam's soul remains intact, but it does raise a sticky question." Bobby commented.
"If he didn't pull me out, then what did?" Dean asked out loud.
"And that, my dear husband, is the number one question." Shia said as she paced the room.
END OF CHAPTER ONE (LAZARUS RISING (4x01) PART ONE).
~A/N~
This is was long overdue, I know. But feel free to let me know what you think about it! Tell me what you'd like to see in the future.