Tech Trees are something I have a problem with. I always chase after that 'one upgrade' that will make me invincible, when I should be increasing my army size or securing more resources. This fic is loosely based on that.
To the Commanders of the Blue Army:
Allow me to introduce myself. I am a former major of the Red Army, captured a few months ago. I write to you from your own prison, (Building number Three, fifth floor, Cell block D, Cell # 23, if it interests you) to explain our humiliating defeat at the 'New Gettysburg' staging area, as you have communicated interest in this topic. Bear in mind that this tale brings me a lot of pain, but it must be told.
It all began four months ago, when I and my staff were given a Command center and four SCVs, as per current regulations on both sides. (Why neither side doesn't start its bases out with more substantial defenses is beyond me) We were dropped into the northwest sector of the staging area, where our scouts had located a cluster of minerals and a gas geyser. Our only objectives were to secure the staging area and eliminate the enemy.
As per our training, we began to expand our resource base by building more SCVs to harvest more minerals. Soon enough, we had eight SCVs harvesting minerals, with a supply depot for the processed minerals, and another SCV dedicated to building a barracks and a refinery. Our base was off to a promising start, everything ticking along like clockwork.
When we began to deploy Marines, my chief scientist, a certain Dr. Teyknyofille, (I always assumed he was Jewish.) approached me and informed me that, if we built an academy, we could build machinery that would make and store Depleted Uranium bullets.
The advantages of such equipment were clear. Our Marines could attack from further away, and the enemy would have to get closer in order to engage our Marines, exposing themselves. It would cost 150 units of minerals for the academy, as well as an additional 150 units of minerals and gas for the machinery, but the defensive and offensive opportunities were clearly worth the investment. I gave the order for the academy to be built.
So, a short time later, we had built a barracks and an academy, and four bunkers around our base. We had deployed twelve Marines, stationed three to a bunker, and more were in the process of being 'defrosted'.
My lieutenant, at this time, approached me about building missile turrets near the bunkers, as well as building an engineering bay to develop our Marine's armor and weapons. Three groups of two missile turrets would suffice in covering our base.
Dr. Teyknyofille, however, claimed that this was a waste of resources, as our Marines could engage air targets, and a Comsat station could do the detection job of a missile turret for much less investment. The missile turrets were clearly redundant. Instead, he proposed that we build a factory, as well as an attached machine shop. Doing so, he argued, would vastly increase our defensive and offensive abilities, as we would then be able to field stronger equipment. It was imperative that we attain immediate superiority over the enemy.
I was forced to agree with him, as he had made such an eloquent argument. And, as he had argued, it would use far fewer minerals, which could only be harvested so fast.
So, we diverted an SCV from mineral harvesting to build the factory. In the meantime, cost constraints forced us to quit deploying Marines, when we only had twelve. The Marine in training was sent back into hibernation, and his armor recycled.
Much later, when the factory and the machine shop were built, Dr. Teyknyofille told me of an upgrade for Vultures. Although it was common knowledge that Vultures were useless for anything other than scouting or harassment, Dr. Teyknyofille said that they could be modified to utilize Spider Mines. Imagine a field of Spider Mines around our base. Should the enemy charge us with ground units, the Spider Mines would seek out groups of soldiers and detonate, killing or severely maiming them. Enemy casualties would be catastrophic. At this point in time, when neither of us had achieved air units, such ground defenses were vital. When the resources were ready, I ordered the equipment to be built.
So we invested considerable resources into building the machinery that would fabricate the Spider Mines, and even more into building five Vultures. (Dr. Teyknyofille gave me a reason why we couldn't just build one and keep refilling it. It seemed like a good reason at the time, but I forget what it was.). Again, the cost constraints of fielding the Vultures, as well as building another supply depot, prevented us from deploying more Marines.
As soon as the Mines had been deployed, we dispatched the Vultures to look for more resource points, desperately hoping to allay the cost of such a combat-ineffective vehicle. In the meantime, we built more supply depots and began stockpiling more minerals and gas, planning on building more Marines and Bunkers with which to defend ourselves, and later expand outward.
Doctor Teyknyofille, however, had other plans.
Pointing out that the Marines cost 50 mineral units each, he pointed out that Siege Tanks cost three times as much, but were infinitely more effective.
The Siege Tanks could be built as regular tanks, but could be deployed near the bunkers and be turned into stationary artillery, one which could take out a single Marine in one shot, and injure any nearby Marines. They could engage the enemy from an amazing range, and could be deployed after support machinery had been built at the Machine Shop. Scouting had revealed that the enemy had not yet begun to show interest in anything other than ground units, and ground-based defenses were becoming more and more valuable. Should the enemy decide to attack us, they would be caught in a thundering storm of Arclite explosions. (Why the Hell am I telling you all this? You all probably know all these details already, but I'm trying to make a point here)
Over the objections of my lieutenant, we suspended the Marine production yet again, and began assembling the Siege Tanks as fast as we could. Meanwhile, our resource harvesting was strained to the limit, and several SCV workers began to complain of fatigue. Dr. Teyknyofille immediately began looking into a Stimpack upgrade for the SCVs.
We had built seven Siege Tanks, and were working on an eighth; when I and my aides sat down to discuss our next move. My lieutenant wanted to build another Command Center and expand our resource base (which was rapidly dwindling, thanks to Dr. Teyknyofille's upgrades), while Sergeant Gillian wanted more Marines armored and deployed.
Siege Tanks were fine, Gillian argued, but they wouldn't be able to handle an all-out attack. If we built more Marines, we would force the attackers to concentrate their fire on more targets. Also, if we were attacked by air, the Siege Tanks would be next to useless, while the Marines could engage the aerial targets.
Dr. Teyknyofille was quick to point out how outdated the Marines were. Their range and effectiveness were insignificant compared to more advanced equipment. If we were to build an armory, we could outfit and deploy Goliath Combat Walkers, which were superior in every way to the Marines. In addition to increased armor, the Goliath could fire its twin auto cannons faster, with larger caliber bullets. But its real advantages lie with its Hellfire Missiles.
With Charon Boosters added on to the Hellfire Missile, a Goliath can engage an air unit at a distance comparable to the range of the Siege Tank. Wraiths and Dropships would be torn to pieces before reaching our base. Any assault with aerial units would cost more than it was worth to the enemy. The tactical advantages of having Goliaths backing up Siege Tanks, complementing each other's weaknesses, was too tempting to pass up.
Unfortunately, we were forced to divert minerals toward building an Armory, and fabricating the equipment for Charon Boosters. Combined with the cost for eight Goliaths, our expenditure totaled more than 1000 units of minerals, a cost that ground our economy to a halt. There was talk amongst the SCV workers of unionizing.
My lieutenant howled and screamed that we were cutting our own throats. Presenting scans from the COMSAT station, he pointed out that the enemy didn't have aerial vehicles in the first place. They didn't even have 'Tier 2' units. The Goliaths were as good as useless.
We all took a look at the photographs. There were rows upon rows of Marines and Medics in the enemy base. Three barracks were churning out more. But no tanks, Vultures, or Goliaths.
Needless to say, this made us nervous. Did the enemy know something we didn't?
Dr. Teyknyofille attempted allayed our fears. We clearly had the superior army, with the superior equipment. If the enemy rushed us with Marines and Medics, the Spider Mines would get them. And if the Spider Mines didn't, then the Bunkers would. And if the Bunkers didn't, then the Siege tanks sure as hell would.
Wasn't it possible, my lieutenant argued, that they might have too many enemy Marines for the minefield to handle? And if that was possible, wasn't it also possible that there might be too many for the Marines in the bunkers to mow down? And, by extension, if THAT was possible, wasn't it also remotely possible that the Siege Tanks might not be able to shoot the rest of the Marines? Especially since the enemy had three other resource outposts harvesting minerals?
Dr. Teyknyofille admitted that this was possible, if improbable.
My lieutenant immediately motioned for Dr. Teyknyofille to be brought up on charges of treason.
The Command Center immediately became a beehive of activity. We were about to be overrun by the old Marines and Medics tactic. Dr. Teyknyofille disappeared back to his science facility, while we commenced with the production of another Command Center. The plan, the futile plan, was to expand to a nearby resource center, which we couldn't defend, and gather more resources to deploy more forces, which we didn't have time to do.
The Command Center was completed, the Marines were loaded up, and the SCV was recovering from heat stroke, when Dr. Teyknyofille approached me again. Quickly, he pointed out that we did not have time to establish a new outpost and start harvesting, and we did not have the manpower to defend it. However, we did have a better alternative.
Using our remaining resources, we could build a covert ops addon to the science facility, and equip a Ghost. In the meantime, the Command Center we had just built could build a missile silo, and then fabricate the Nuclear Missile.
Nuclear missiles were something I had studied in Officers School, but I was unfamiliar with the finer aspects of their use, as this was my first engagement. Dr. Teyknyofille pointed out that the Blue Army would be forced to squeeze through a bottleneck. Here, they would be bunched up, vulnerable. If a Ghost was positioned on higher ground, he could guide a nuclear missile right into the middle of the enemy. The Blue Army would lose at least 50 percent of their forces, and the survivors would be too damaged to continue the assault on our base.
As much as I personally despised him, Dr. Teyknyofille provided the only possible way of surviving the next engagement. We brought the Command Center back to the ground and began building that infernal silo. In the meantime, Dr. Teyknyofille's team began training one of our few Ghosts.
The Ghost barely got into position in time. Twenty five Marines ran through the western pass, and right into the minefield. They shot a few of the spider mines, but were blown to kingdom come by the rest. The damage was done, however. We had a gaping hole in our minefield, and there was nothing preventing the rest of them from charging right through.
That's right, the rest of them. I never got around to getting a full count, but a hundred Marines and twenty-five Medics sounds like a safe bet. They marched right into that western pass, rank and file, Medics evenly distributed. They ran right into that pass, that so-called deathtrap, and our operative sighted on the middle of the formation. The nuke shot from its silo, arcing up into the air majestically.
The Blue army promptly stopped, turned around, and ran in the opposite direction. Still in perfect rank and file.
The nuke hit precisely where it was supposed to be, where they were supposed to be, but they weren't. Their casualties: 3 Marines, one of whom had tripped, fallen, and been trampled. (Why the (Censored) Hell did it take ten (Censored) seconds for the (Censored) Nuke to travel fifty (Censored) meters? (CENSORED!)
Largely undamaged, the Blue Army came rushing back through the slightly wider pass, through the crater, and right to our base. Our Siege Tanks kept up a barrage of Arclite, and the Marines in the bunkers fought valiantly.
However, the forward ranks of the Blue Army rushed forward and split up into teams, which engaged the Tanks and bunkers at point-blank range. This was nothing more than a nuisance, and could have been easily ignored. However, in their panic, the Siege Tank gunners shot each other to pieces, an action similar to scratching the fleas off of someone else's back with a flamethrower. (Our training budget also suffered trying to accommodate Dr. Teyknyofille's upgrades)
The Goliaths were smashed into scrap. The bunkers, already weakened by the Arclite shells, barely lasted longer. The sound of gunfire was like the roar of a tidal wave, the air so full of U-238 shells that they actually started colliding. They targeted our factory first, and then destroyed our barracks. A futile act, since our supply depots were completely bare of armor and machine parts.
Within five minutes our only building left was our original Command Center, which was also pretty heavily damaged from collateral damage. The survivors of the Red Army surrendered; I, my lieutenant, the admin staff in the Command center, Dr. Teyknyofille, and that one SCV driver who was still recovering from fatigue.
And so, that's the whole story behind our inglorious defeat at 'New Gettysburg'. In a rather twisted sort of reason, we were defeated by our own superiority.
At this moment, I'd like to make it clear why I'm writing this. I do not seek to rationalize my poor judgment, nor do I seek to blame my mistakes on others.
However, if I continue to be held in the same cell as Dr. Teyknyofille, then I can not be held accountable for my actions.
Thank you.
Major Billy 'Luddite' Atkinson
Blue Army Military Prison
Building number Three, fifth floor Cell block D, Cell # 23
A/N: I hope that was funnier than I thought it was. Then again, I didn't think that my previous fic was all that good... Don't forget to R&R.
Loosely based off of 'Superiority', by Arthur C. Clarke, the so-called master of Science Fiction.
Now, if you guys will excuse me, I'm off to write my next fic, 'Take a Breath'. I can't guarantee that this next one will be filed under 'Humor'. Far from it.
In other news, today (11/11) is Veterans Day in America. I'd like to ask, whether you are in America, Australia, Britain, or elsewhere, to set aside a few seconds to thank the Veterens who have fought and died for your freedom. Thank you.