I looked sadly at the snow that was falling, the blank color not helping my depressed state. Sighing softly, I opened the window to look at the snowflakes and at the children on the park near my house, knowing that I should probably go there like my two best friends, Gumi and Teto, but, unlike them, I'm just not in the mood for throwing snowballs at Kaito. I frowned slightly, suddenly remembering the reason of why I'm in the room all alone. Shaking my head, I try to forget about him.

Oh, I should introduce myself. I'm Kagene Rin, sixteen years-old and studying at Crypton Academy with my best friends. I have blond hair, blue eyes and very, well, small for my age I'm mostly know for begin very logical and a little pessimist, but I get the best grades in my class, so I'm also know as a very big nerd.

Well, if you're asking yourself "Doesn't nerds usually get bullied?", the answer is "yes and no". They try to get to me, but every time the bastards try to get physical I… Use my karate on them! But, no, I don't take karate classes. Actually, if it isn't Teto nearly killing them, the person who protects me is the cold-hearted bastard that is the reason for my mood.

Kagamine Len.

Len-san is very cold and is always lonely (when his brother Oliver isn't there to annoy him), but every time Akaito and his gang (I don't understand how Akaito and the idiotic, but sweet Kaito are brothers) try to hurt me, he actually helps me, at least when Teto isn't around. Usually, we never really talk or look at each other, like a silent agreement, but the memories from yesterday couldn't help but make me nervous…

Flashback

I stared quietly as Len-san and Akaito glared at each other. Somehow, those two never actually fought, but their "fight" was with their eyes (unlike Teto, who nearly punched the life out of the read-haired Shion and his friends). As always, Akaito broke the eyes contact, chuckling as he looked away. I never really understood this, since Shion loved to fight and Kagamine was very good at karate, but I wasn't about to complain.

"You won once again, Kagamine." Akaito said, walking out of the room, but stopping before he was completely outside. "But this isn't over yet."

I rolled my eyes since Shion always said that, but always got beaten by Kagamine-san. I started picking up the things Akaito threw at the ground before Len-san arrived and put them on my orange backpack, ready to leave, but then I noticed that Kagamine-san was still there.

He was staring at me as if expecting something, his deep blue eyes nearly boring a hole on my soul. I was just about to ask what he wanted, since usually he was gone before me, but he answered with a sigh and words that practically pierced my chest.

"Well, I don't really have any hope for you anyway." He said before walking out of the classroom, leaving me very confused.

Flashback End

I don't really have of hope for myself too, begin too logical doesn't leave time for happiness, but I wanted to know what he meant by that. I figured it out at 2 A.M and now I could finally relate to his disappointment with me, after all, I was now disappointed with me too…

Len-san wanted a "Thank you".

It was true that even with all his help I was very ungrateful, ignoring him after his help with Akaito, on daily basis and never actually talking to him. But it isn't my fault, for some reason, it's just so hard to talk to him! He never smiles, rarely talks and it's difficult to know if he at least has emotion! But I have to admit that I'm a little prideful and that's the main reason why I never said "thank you".

I wonder why he even wanted a thank you anyway! It's not like I mattered to him! Looking at my lap, I knew that it was simply a excuse, after all, I must matter at least a little for him to protect me from Akaito. Smiling bitterly as I realized he must be very lonely…. A little like me. I wonder how in old animes like the ones I watch (I just love CardCaptor Sakura! Eriol is so smart!) people are always happy and loved, so enviable…

I'm loved by my small family and my two only friends, but I couldn't tell them how I'm feeling. Every time they ask if I'm fine, the words "No, actually, I'm feeling very empty", but all that comes from my mouth is lies, like "I'm fine". I wish I could answer truthfully to a "How are you?"

I think I can relate to Len-san about begin serious all the time, but I have to say Kagamine-san is the second biggest mystery I have ever seen in my life, the first begin myself. I want to ask him the same questions I ask myself… Why hide away? Is it scary for him to laugh, just like me? Does he really never want to see anyone? Is that all even true? Because I never actually got the answers from myself.

I shouldn't be thinking about making such questions to him, since I can't even say a word to him. Looking at the snowflakes in front of me, I softly whispered "How are you?, would he even answer truthfully? I closed the window and embraced my heart-shaped pillow (a gift from Gumi), sitting on the ground.

I stared dully at the wood ground, trying to find a logical answer when a sudden thought came to my mind: "Should I take a break from thinking logical all the time?" It was really something I had never thought of before… Should I really just think with my… Heart? I shook my head. No, I understood, it's just that I wanted to know what to say so he won't get mad.

But that words kept echoing around my head. I just don't really know what I want anymore. What is the happiness of begin all logical, or perhaps it was unhappiness? I didn't really know anymore. Maybe thinking with my heart like the others wasn't so bad… Was it? Maybe it was better than living on like I was… I sighed, not knowing what to wish for anymore.

It's all Len-san's fault! Does he really want a simply "thank you" so much? Did he notice the affect of his words on me? This was really making me tired… Quietly, I got underneath the covers, feeling little warmth, since I was strangely cold… When did "finding a way to say thank you" turned into this? What did I do to deserve this?

"Thank you" I just wanted to say thank!

"Thank you" Why is it so hard?

"Thank you" Just once would suffice.

I didn't know when I started to cry, but soon I sobbing on my pillow. I just want to say thank you… That was the last thing I thought before going to sleep.

I stared blankly at the board as Hiyama-sensei talked about something I already knew about, trying to control myself to not look at Kagamine-san. I barely noticed when Hiyama-sensei stopped talking and started to get his things from his desk, meaning that the bell rang and I didn't notice. Half of the class didn't come today, since they got sick from playing in the snow yesterday. Good thing Akaito got sick, but Gumi and Teto did too.

I snapped out of my musings when nearly everyone was already out. I noticed that, luckily, Kagamine-san was still putting his things on his backpack. Quickly, I went over him and stayed in front of him. Len-san looked at me curiously and I took a deep breth, trying to will the words out of my mouth. Nothing came out.

I wanted to know if the really wanted to know? Why did he hide things like me? He never smiled or talks, did he really want to talk to me? If he doesn't talk, I will never know his thoughts, dreams, wishs… I wanted to it… To know him… Suddenly, I noticed I had tears rolling down my face and a startled Kagamine-san looking at me.

Looking down and suddenly finding courage to say something, I finally managed a question.

"Hello, how are you?" I said quietly, finding my question stupid. I waited for him to repeat the words from before, but he jus stood there doing something shocking.

He was smiling, and such a beautiful smile.

"I'm fine, Rin."