HERMES' DIRTY LITTLE SECRET #1

A/N: Some creepy stuff about Hermes xD

Ps. This 'MY DIRTY LITTLE SECRET' series is just a product of pure insanity (pops outta my head). It doesn't relate to the other genres of my stories.

Compliments to trinity4 for the idea. Thanks

"HERMES! What's the rush!" Ares grabbed Hermes' back collar. The messenger god choked and coughed, "What the heck Ares! What if you broke my neck?" He fixed his collar and his winged cap. Ares smirked, "I wish I could. May I?" and nearly strangled Hermes.

"Hold it! I have to go." Hermes was about to excuse himself when something fished Ares' attention.

"What's that in your hand, buddy?" Ares asked with skeptic eyes.

Hermes placed his hands behind him and looked around, "What? What are you talking about?"

"Heeeeeeeh?" Ares' smiled like a dog. He jerked at Hermes to grab his hand and the messenger god dropped his bag. "Gimme that!" Ares struggled with Hermes to see what he was holding.

"It's a message, you idiot! It's confidential!" Hermes defended himself, hiding the pale skin on his face.

"Is this my underwear?"

Both gods turned to Athena, holding white satin underwear in front of her face. She blushed and breathed fire at Hermes, "What were you gonna do with it, asshole?"

"Ahah!Gotcha!" Ares caught the pictures on Hermes' hand. Hermes was about to grab them from Ares but Athena kicked his ass away, "Why do you have my underwear!" she then turned to Ares to give him permission to kill the messenger god.

"Ares? Your nose is bleeding…" Athena pointed at Ares' nose as he was looking at the pictures. Ares seemed to wake up, "Wh-What? Me?"

"Gimme that!" Athena snatched the pictures. Her eyes went wide and her jaw dropped, "WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT THE GIRLS' SHOWER ROOM, HERMES!" she scanned at each picture, "Aphrodite… Artemis… Hera…" her right eye twitched endlessly.

"Oh my gods Athena you're hot…" Ares spoke dreamily and was rewarded with a footprint embossed on his face.

"Hermes! What were you gonna do with these?" Athena faced a curling Hermes on the ground, shivering from the smoke coming out of Athena's nose, and she was about to form hard muscles ready to hammer him.

"I… I…" Hermes stammered, really freaked out. His blackberry suddenly rang a message, and even before he could read it, Athena snatched the phone from his hand and read:

You got the pics? $20,000 agreed

"EHMAYGAWD! YOU'RE SELLING OUR BODIES!" Athena's eyes were set aflame, and hell was ready to break loose. Ares finally regained consciousness, "I'll buy em! $30 grand!" and was again rewarded with a foot print on his nut.

"Who's selling our bodies, Athena? I'll feed him to Tartarus" Artemis peered at them, she was beside Aphrodite. Athena smirked evilly and thought of an idea which finally ended the day…with a Hermes fully bandaged at the Olympian hospital and only his eyes were visible.

Hermes opened his eyes after his long unconsciousness; last thing he remembered was a boulder hitting his nose.

"Psssst." Ares called his attention on his bedside, "So, $30 grand? Agreed?"

A/N: I hate being randomly crazy…please review - Lol.

~AthenAres~