To Nowaki, Hiro-san was most important. More important than anything else in the world. More important than the sun, the moon, the stars, the ocean, the air. More important than all of these things combined. After all, to him, Hiro-san shone more brightly than the sun, moon, and stars could ever hope to. Nowaki's love for him was bigger, deeper, and stronger than the ocean. And to him, Hiro-san was as vital as air. Air surrounds everything, holding it, keeping it warm and giving it life. Without air, there could not be life. Hiro-san was like that. Hiro-san was everything. Without Hiro-san, he wouldn't be able to breathe.
He hoped he was like that in Hiro-san's eyes. A person as vital as air.
If he was, Nowaki could understand how upset Hiro-san was when he left to study in America for a year. That terrible, deep, yearning ache Nowaki had felt every day, missing Hiro-san with every fibre of his being. Had Hiro-san felt like that too? Was he as important to Hiro-san as Hiro-san was to him?
In some ways, he hoped not.
He didn't like to think of Hiro-san feeling that deep, yearning ache, that terrible loneliness. If it had been so bad for Nowaki that he couldn't even bear to send a letter for fear that he would want to go running home immediately, would the feelings have been the same for Hiro-san? He didn't want to be the cause of such feelings. He didn't want to cause Hiro-san any pain.
His feelings were this, it really was true. But he always seemed to make Hiro-san cry. For such a proud man, Hiro-san cried very easily. It was his crying face that made Nowaki fall for him at first sight. He truly did love Hiro-san's crying face, but he didn't like that he cried. Hiro-san should always smile, always be happy. That would make Nowaki happiest. Hiro-san's smile was so bright. Because Hiro-san was the person Nowaki loved the most, he wanted him to always be smiling.
This was originally going to be MUCH shorter, just the first paragraph and the line after it, but I simply can't bear to post something that short. It makes me feel like I'm being lazy. Thanks for reading!