I'll fight.
Everybody always told me, everything is going to be okay. It'll be fine, we're okay, and the best of all, you're okay.
Looking back at my life, short as it is, I really think those people need glasses, or a reality check, because from my point of view, everything is going to hell, it won't be fine, my family isn't doing so great, and well I'm certainly not fine, or okay, or anything good at all for that matter.
No really, from where I stand, it's all lies, and I'm tired of it, pull those eye caps of, get your head out of the sand, look, and really, really look. You'll see the truth, you'll see how messed up my life is. My family isn't doing as great as it looks, no, my family isn't even a family anymore.
My mother is death, My father is never there, my grandpa is fighting cancer, my aunts are gone, my uncles are in hiding, my cousins are either dead or fighting somewhere for their life, and the best is yet to come, my brother, my oh so great twice-blessed brother is the source of all evil, and the source of all the pain and heartbreak in my family.
The sad part really, is that I told them, I told all of them, so many times, but they wouldn't listen, they wouldn't see.
It was all there, the signs. His behavior, his attitude, his actions, his words, it was so real, and so clear for everybody to see, but nobody saw it, nobody wanted to touch that bubble of fake happiness. Of course, at some point they had to face the truth, my aunts and uncles, even mom had to see it on her last day of life. She must have seen it was her twice-blessed, that it was him who pushed Excalibur trough her heart. I just hope she also saw how I tried, oh how hard I tried to stop him. Yeah after that they all saw, they had their reality check. Too bad it was too late, just a little too late.
Now we are here, fighting a never ending war, everybody is fighting, the whole world and every thinking human/demon/white lighter on it. Everlasting battles, a continuation of deaths, pain, regret, despair, horror, are the most used emotions now. Oh the little hope there is left.
That's what we're living on now, that last straw of hope, the hope that someday we will win, that someday we will conquer his army, the hope that someday we can live again, laugh again, see the sun again. The memories of the good times, the times we want back, how desperately we cling to those memories. The memories of loved ones, lost in battle, or lost by betrayal.
You see now, they all see now. Nothing is going to be okay, it won't be fine, they are not doing okay, and the best of all, I'm not doing okay.
They took glasses, they got their reality check, and all they see is a living hell.
But I'll fight, I fight to get the old world back, to see the sun again. I fight for those memories. I fight to get a life like that.
But most of all, I fight for my brother, my twice-blessed, oh so great, source of all evil brother. I fight for him, though against him. To get him back, back from evil.
Because I know, deep down, he was not always this. He did not always have such an attitude, his behavior once was that of a good man, a good son, a good brother, and despite everything he has done, despite everything I had to live trough. I'll fight for him, for my brother. I'll fight till I'll die.