Till There Was You
Fanfic
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A/N: I'm not exactly good at romance, and I favor only two of my Karl/Saya fanfics. lol So I wrote this while listening to "He said eternity" by In This Moment, because it matched up to the "plot" of this fanfic.
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"I didn't mean to kill him." Saya confessed, speaking to no one but herself.
She held onto the stone wall of the garden's gate as she staggered along side of it. She felt like there was an edge behind her, which seemed as if it were trying to force her to fall away from where she was standing. Ignoring it, she went on to where she was trying to get to.
"He was sad." Saya went on, leaping from the walls and back onto the grass field leading into the forbidden gardens. She fell into a dellusional state as she wondered further into the field's garden. Once finding a place to sit, she let herself relax on the broken tomb-like stone. "I didn't think..."
"I'm sure you didn't." a voice hushed.
Saya felt two hands reach out and pull her down from her seat toward the soft floor beneath. Awkwardly lying beside a familiar shadow, she rolled onto her side to face him. Phantom. He was actually here; staring at her with no pity or pain in his eyes.
"Why...?"
"You never think. I died only for you." Phantom muttered.
"You didn't expect it."
"I did. All I desired was you, but Karl only wanted us both dead. He cared nothing for you."
Saya closed her eyes in a struggle to believe this as a dream or some kind of insanity awakening her to believe... this ghost was real. "You don't mean that. You are Karl."
"Part of him." Phantom sighed, he rolled onto his side and rest his head on his hand. He watched her closely while he spoke. "I thought it was absurd at first, to actually kill you would bring me happiness in the afterlife... But it didn't. It never made me happy to leave you behind."
Saya sat up and glared down at him. "Don't ever say that! Phantom, you and Karl did not deserve to die...!"
"So you guilt yourself for our death? Why?" Phantom challenged with a horrible grin. It pained her to see such a smug look on his face when she was in shame. "Answer me, Saya."
She looked down and tossed back her long bangs away from her face. If she confessed she felt some kind of affection or concern, it'd probably amuse him to torment her, but... She did. At the last minute, she felt like loving Karl. There was no reason to hate someone she hardly knew, or to even find the right reason to kill him, at that.
"I... thought... There's no reason not to." Saya said.
Phantom tapped his nails on the grass before plucking the grass from the floors. For awhile, he did not say anything. Until something got him talking again. "I see. So why guilt? Karl was only a man with no purpose left. He was suppose to die on the year of 1917; that alone drove him into desperation."
"Yes..." Saya shut her eyes. "You know I don't care."
"Pity he's not here to hear you say that." Phantom forward himself to bring her near to him, just by taking her hand in his. "And pity he can't stop me from seducing you over and over again."
"Phantom..." Saya stared into his dim red eyes; just wishing those dark brown ones would appear and stop what may happen if Phantom did not take a grip over himself. "I don't l-love you."
"But you want to."
"I don't."
Phantom prepared to kiss her, but she turned away in shame. She thought of nothing but Karl. No one but him. "Karl told me, before he died, that he was waiting for me to end it. I asked myself what he meant... Was it you he wanted to keep from?"
The long haired man, so similar to Karl, just stared at her in suprise. Suddenly, a smooth grin formed across his face.
"Maybe so. Perhaps he wanted freedom from what we were given; new life." he tried to kiss her again. She avoided it.
Saya inched from him and took a deep breathe. "I wonder... are you still part of Karl or...?"
"He's not my problem anymore." Phantom answered in a very straightforward tone. He never enjoyed how introspective Saya could be. Just leading him back onto the subject never stopped him from going on with what he wanted to.
"Then how are you here?"
"He asked me." Phantom lied down on his back, staring up at the sky so enviously. "Your grief is just as bad as Solomon's. Hn. I did what I could to make it better... So, to simply say; it's not your fault for what he was wanting. He wants you to know that."
Saya closed her eyes again. Karl never did deserve death. Phantom didn't either... If Hagi knew what grief she had to grow through with each chevalier she killed, he'd be appalled. Caring, to him, was not her nature when it came to chiropterans. Of all the things she and Karl could've been doing if things were different... would it make her happy?
She found herself slumped into the embrace of the Phantom. She was crying. She didn't understand how or why he was comforting her with so many kisses and whispers of how she'll always be forgiven. Then came a familiar voice between her crying and Phantom's whispers...
I always loved you...
Saya sobbed even harder.
Phantom was brushing back her long-short hair with his gloved fingers, then had sense to rain his comforting kisses on her exposed throat next. He entwined their fingers together as he muttered against her lips. "I love you too."
Tears flowed unwillingly down her cheeks as she begun to realize she lost the two most uncommon men she had ever come across. Two men in one form; with consciousness that they had to follow their dreams. Now she ended what they had by giving them what they really wanted. Until now, Karl made her see that.
After an hour or so, Saya fell asleep in his arms. His red eyes watched her slumber and the minute came at last for him to leave.
"Never blame yourself... my love." Phantom lied her down on the grass and slipped away. He reached into his cloak and pulled out a fresh blue rose, then set it behind her ear in gratitude. "I just wanted to see her again..." he whispered.
Phantom snatched his attention from her and wondered away into the darkness, gladly accepting his fate of nonexistence just as Karl accepted his. He had nowhere else to go; making Saya's guilt ridden of eased him enough.