it was late, but Ben Cartwright was wide - awake. He'd expected Adam home that day, but he hadn't been on the afternoon stage. As he sat staring into the fire, he heard the sound of hoofbeats and rose to go to the door. A lifetime of caution made him stop and take his Colt from its holster. Holding it pointing to the ground, he opened the door and walked outside. A dim light shone from the barn's open door.

Ben crossed the yard and entered the barn to see Adam unsaddling a strange horse. "Adam," his voice was quiet.

Adam turned and smiled wearily at his father. "Pa, it's good to be home." He moved around the horse and took the bit from its mouth. Ben could hear him talking softly to the animal. He picked up a curry comb, and joined his son in the stall. While Adam fetched water and feed for the horse, Ben began to brush and wipe him down. Adam joined him in a moment, and they worked in silence for a few minutes.

"Did you find her, son?" Ben finally asked.

Adam continued to brush the horse in silence. Ben stole a look at him, and saw tears running down his cheeks. Finally he spoke. "I found her, Pa. She's in San Francisco, living in a rundown boarding house in the worst part of town. I tried to get her to come home with me, but she wouldn't. She blames you and me for Jason's death."

Ben was shocked. "She blames us? Why?"

"Because we talked Jason into turning himself in. You and I convinced him to go back to San Francisco and testify against Murdoch. The judge here said he'd have to serve some time, but they didn't know he'd have to do it on a prison ship." Adam finished wiping down the horse, and put the brush and rag away. He stopped and waited for Ben.

The two men walked towards the house, and Ben put a comforting arm across his son's shoulders. They entered, and Adam sank into his favorite blue chair with a deep sigh.

"Stay there, Adam, and I'll get you some coffee." Ben hurried to the kitchen. When he came back in a few minutes, Adam was staring into the fire. Ben poured him coffee, and handed him a small plate with a quarter of a pie on it. Adam took it and began to eat automatically. After a few bites he put the plate down and went on with his story. "Mariette said the conditions were brutal - the men were starved and hired out to work. All the money went to the man who owns the ship. Cholera broke out, and Jason caught it and died. She was never allowed to visit him, to talk to him. She bribed a guard to tell her where Jason would be working, and she'd go down and see him, watch him working. A couple of times she was able to get close enough to talk to him, but when the guard saw them together, he shouted at her and struck Jason down with the butt of his rifle."

Ben shook his head. "Our poor girl - and poor Jason. How is she living, Adam?"

Adam leaned back in his chair and sipped his coffee. "She has a job working in a dress shop. She convinced the owner that she was from France - she speaks with a fake accent and her school girl french was good enough to fool the owner, a Madame Beaudrot."

"Is this Madame Beaudrot good to her?"

Adam snorted. "Hardly. She's shrill and hateful - like a fishwife. When I tried to speak to Mariette while she was working, that woman smirked at us as if we were -" He broke off in disgust. "I waited outside until the shop closed, and then I followed Mariette to her boarding house. I had a hard time getting her to talk with me, but finally she told me what happened. After they returned to San Francisco, Jason needed an attorney, and that took a fair bit of the money they'd saved. Then Mariette was ill, and she needed money for a doctor. She didn't tell Jason she was sick, and she didn't tell him where she was living. He died believing that he'd provided for her, Pa."

Adam leaned back in his chair and looked at his father. "She's so changed, Pa. I could tell she'd been sick just by looking at her. She won't admit she needs help, and she's angry and bitter. She isn't like our Mari at all."

Ben looked at the young man across from him. He was pale with exhaustion, and there were dark circles under his eyes. While Ben was sad for the loss his adopted daughter had suffered, his immediate concern was for his son. Adam was tired to the point of illness.

"Let's go on upstairs, son. You look worn out, and we both need to get some sleep."

Adam stood up, and he and Ben walked upstairs together. They stopped at the door to Adam's bedroom, and Ben squeezed his shoulder. "Don't think about it anymore tonight, Adam. Say your prayers, get some rest, and we'll figure out a way to help Mari tomorrow. Everything will look better in the morning."

Adam said goodnight to his father and went inside. Before getting ready for bed, he knelt beside his bed, folded his hands, and prayed for guidance in helping Mariette.

...

That same evening Mariette lay in her bed, thinking over her confrontation with Adam Cartwright. It had been well over a year since she'd seen her adopted family - a year of worry over Jason, of illness and despair, of loneliness and fear. Somehow she had survived all of it although she wasn't sure how. She'd just gotten up every morning and put one foot in front of the other. There was no joy or happiness in her now. She felt old and drained. It had been months since she had prayed - she'd stopped when Jason died. God had turned His face from her, and she knew her prayers had gone unheard and unanswered.

When she'd seen Adam in Madame Beaudrot's shop, she'd felt relief for a second - but just for a second. Her sense of loss came rushing upon her all at once, and she'd been overwhelmed by it. She'd almost welcomed the old harpy's intrusion on their conversation. She could see from his expression that Adam had been shocked and disgusted by Madame's innuendo, and she'd had time to compose herself before he could speak with her again.

She turned on her side, but she couldn't find a comfortable position. If only she and Jason had run away,, if only Papa - no, she'd never think of Ben Cartwright that way again - and Adam hadn't convinced him to testify against Murdoch...exhaustion overcame her and she drifted off to sleep.

There was a noise and she stirred in sleep. I'm dreaming, she thought, there's no one here. She opened her eyes to see Jake and Catherine DuPont standing at the foot of her bed. "Mother - Father, you're here?"

Her parents were holding hands and smiling at her. A light shone behind them. Jake spoke, "Mariette, it's time for you to go home. There's nothing for you here anymore. You were a good wife to Jason, but he's gone. Go back to Virginia City. You have family and friends there."

"Father, I can't go back. Ben and Adam Cartwright - it's their fault Jason died..." she protested.

"No, Mariette-"

She opened her eyes wide. Jason was there next to her parents. "Jason?"

"Mariette, it was my fault - I knew what I did was wrong. Stop blaming the Cartwrights. They're your family and they love you. Go back to them. You're all alone here..." He turned and walked away.

Mariette cried out, "Jason, come back."

Jake and Catherine reached out to her. "He'll come for you when it's time, Mariette. Until then, go home." She watched as they melted away in the early morning light.

...

Two nights later Ben Cartwright heard a noise downstairs. He quietly rose from his bed, slipped on his robe and boots, and went to the landing. A lamp had been lit in the great room, and he made his way down slowly, lookding for an intruder. To his surprise, Hoss was up, dressed, and drinking a cup of coffee. "What are you doing up so late?" Ben asked.

The big man started. "Pa! I didn't see you. I haven't been able to sleep since Adam told me about Mari. It just isn't right, Pa, for her to be in that big city all by herself. I'm going after her."

Ben put his hand on his son's shoulder. "Hoss, I'm concerned about Mari, too, but...well, Adam said she'd barely talk to him. Don't you think she might treat you the same?"

Hoss shook his head. "I don't know, Pa. She might, but...I've got to try. She's my sister, Pa. We're the same age, were in the same grade in school...I just know I've got to try."

Ben patted Hoss's shoulder. "All right, son, all right. You make your trip to San Francisco, wire me when you get there."

Hoss swallowed the last of his coffee, picked up his bedroll, and went to the door. He opened it and turned. "I'll bring her home, Pa." Then he was gone, and Ben was left staring into the cold dark fireplace.