Disclaimer: If I owned Gakuen Alice, no one would ever read it :D
Mentions Of: Confessions Of Georgia Nicolson, Arrow and Vivienne Westwood.
Warning: OOC might ensue.
All Because Of A Potato
The girl was at fault
If it weren't for her
(And alright, my stupid pride)
I wouldn't be at the hospital
With a record saying
That I fainted
Because I ate mashed potatoes
Sakura Mikan woke-up early today to go to the streets and help her friend Umenomiya Anna with the latest product added at her restaurant: mashed potatoes. Mikan promised the pinkette that she would be helping her spread the word by giving out free taste's at the streets.
Of course Anna was happy that Mikan accepted the task, so she promised to pay her twice of her daily salary as a waitress at Anna's restaurant. The girl had no one else to go to except for Mikan since Hotaru was busy with her company and might fry Anna for even asking her to give out free mashed potatoes at the street. Sumire, Nonoko, Wakako and Misaki also have their own fair share of work. And her guy friends were too damn lazy to help her out anyway.
So being the good friend she is, Mikan offered to help. But in all honesty, Mikan wanted a taste of those mashed potatoes, and she realized that the only reason she could taste it was to sell it. Hotaru's proud of her best friend because of that. She taught her well.
Mikan stopped by at the restaurant first to get the stand, the delicious mashed potatoes, and, oh dear God, a potato suit. Mikan was glad that the potato mascot suit didn't have a hole for her face so that people won't laugh at her pointedly.
Anna saw Mikan's disappointed glower at the potato suit. "Oh, Mikan! I have another potato suit ordered that has a hole for your face! Would you feel better about using that one instead?" Mikan smiled at her friend. "I like this one better." Anna nodded and squealed. "Thank you again!"
Mikan nodded. "Sure thing, Anna. Just remember that you are paying me twice for my salary for a week, alright?" Anna nodded her head again. "Of course, Mikan! Now, hurry up! I can't wait until people would be screaming at me demanding my mashed potatoes!" Mikan sweatdropped.
She knew it. All these time, Anna was a closet sadist. Oh, what would Yuu say? 'Don't worry, that one is a closet emo.' Mikan's mind reminded her. Mikan agreed to the voice known as Inner Mikan. 'I agree with you. They are a perfect pair.' If Mikan would be brandished sane, people would have laughed. She was quite happy being on the bridge from sane to insanity.
Mikan, with the help of Wakako's boyfriend, Mochiage, simply known as Mochu, the mashed potato stand was now standing at all it's glory at the park near Anna's classy restaurant. Which by the way was called The Pink Apron. Did someone just snorted?
Mochu gave Mikan a thumbs up. "Good luck, Mikan." Mikan smiled at the almost bald boy. "Thanks, Mochu. I'll make sure to make the people I will the give the mashed potatoes at to be craving for more." Mochu sweatdropped. "I was talking about surviving with the potato suit."
Mikan turned to look at the brown paper bag that was tucked underneath her left arm. "Oh. Right. Thanks a bunch, Mochu. I really hope I can survive from all the heatnosity I would probably be experiencing inside this suit."
Mochu raised a brow. "Heatnosity? You've been reading Confessions Of Georgia Nicolson, are you?" Mikan grinned deviously at the boy. "And how did you know?" Mochu rolled his eyes. "I have a freakin' girlfriend named Usami Wakako who so happens to own all the different versions of the book."
Mikan laughed. "Yeah, I know. I borrowed the books from her and came to the conclusion that if I became the president of Japan, I will change the country's name to 'sushi-a-gogo' land." Mochu laughed with her. "I'm counting on that, Sakura Mikan!" Mikan waved goodbye to Mochu, and when the boy disappeared, she began taking out the boxes that contained heavenly mashed potatoes. If Mikan wasn't so nice, she would have take a run for it and eat the mashed potatoes.
After setting up the stand, she checked her watch. It was still damn early; it was seven-a-freakin-thirty in the damning morning. And Mikan is aware that she repeated the sentence and added some fabulous suffixes to it. This is what happens when you make friends with bridge jumpers who also do cliffs. Not literally, of course. Her friends go for jumping at airplanes.
She tied her elbow-length brunette hair into a tight bun and slicked her bangs back with the hair net that comes with the potato suit. Oh my Lord, the worst part has come. Sakura Mikan, the eighteen year old girl who works at The Pink Apron and studies History at college was wearing a potato suit at the middle of the park at a Saturday morning.
The birds started singing their daily tunes, and Mikan glared at them pointedly behind the head of the potato suit. Then, she looked down when she realized that the fabric of the suit was being pulled. And all of a sudden, the head of the potato mascot suit fell down at the head of the kid.
The mother gasped and started asking her child if he was okay. The kid nodded and Mikan quickly took the head of the potato mascot suit and wore it at her head again; in case the mother would suddenly have her arrested for killing her child with the head of a potato mascot suit. And Mikan suddenly realized that the acronym for potato mascot suit was actually PMS. Yes, that is right. PMS. How Mikan hates that too.
"Uh, would you like one? It's for free?" Mikan offered two plastic cups of mashed potatoes to the child (who was miraculously not crying and was acting more mature than his mother) and the mother. They accepted happily and walked-off. Mikan sighed in relief. She wasn't going to be sued. And that, my friends, is good.
The Hyuuga Household was having another normal day. It was eight o'clock in the morning and Hyuuga Natsume's manly shrieks were heard from his study throughout the entire household. The maids didn't bother about it as they continue cleaning the house.
"WHY THE HELL WOULD I WANT TO HAVE A CATERING AT A DAMNED PARTY! I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THERE WAS A PARTY!" Natsume was making dramatic hand signs as he continued shouting at Ruka. "Natsume, it's not your choice whether you want food there or not, it's the people who are going to be there." Ruka reminded the fuming man.
"Ruka, I don't give a damn! They are using a business meeting with me as an excuse to hold a party! A party! With a catering, no less! And they want me to pay for it! Hah! Who said there is going to be a party, anyway?" And back again to phase one.
Ruka sighed as he weave both his hands through his blonde hair. Natsume had been screaming from the top of his lungs when Ruka woke him up at the bathroom, the bathroom!, of his bedroom. Then, they went to the study to talk about Ruka's urgent business report which turned out to be some party that the company council members were holding to accommodate the other businessmen who will be having a meeting with the one and only Hyuuga Natsume.
Ruka kept telling him that whether he likes it or not, there would be food for the guest's. He was able to convince Natsume to at least hold the party, but he started getting angry again when he mentioned the catering service. After shouting about not wanting a caterer, Natsume would then shout about not wanting to hold the party.
'Good grief, Natsume is like a broken tape recorder,' Ruka thought while wiping the sweat off from his forehead with a white handkerchief that came from his pockets. The blonde sighed again before saying, "Come on, Natsume. We need a caterer." Natsume death glared Ruka.
"FOR THE LAST TIME! NO CATERING AT THE PARTY! I WOULD NOT ATTEND A PARTY BECAUSE THERE WILL BE NO PARTY UNDER THE EXPENSES OF HYUUGA CORPORATION!"
'Oh my God he is like a girl.' Ruka didn't know why but he just couldn't help but think of the girly 'Oh my God'. Besides, the expression usually used by women was something that could be use with a sentence to describe Natsume's screaming like he is a banshee on the lose.
"Look, I-.." Before Ruka could finish, he heard the door slamming shut. "I should have known.." He thought out loud.
"THERE WOULD BE NO PARTY, AND NO CATERING!"
"THERE WOULD BE NO PARTY, AND NO CATERING!"
"THERE WOULD BE NO PARTY, AND NO CATERING!"
"THERE WOULD BE NO-.."
Before the tape recorder could repeat itself, Ruka grabbed it and smashed the device with his foot.
Natsume was wearing a pair of jeans and a blue and white striped collared-shirt from Arrow with the signature ring from Vivienne Westwood at his left hand's midddle finger and a black watch strapped on his right wrist.
Before the infuriated boy knew it, he kicked his chaffeur out of his car and drove to the park. His watch said eight-thirty in the morning, and Hyuuga Natsume should still be sleeping at that time if it hadn't been for his blonde bestfriend Ruka. 'I would never make friends with blondes again.' He reminded himself.
He was now sitting at those usually empty benches at the park, and he let his eyes stay on the very same spot the entire time: the stupid trash can. The park was almost empty, with some people cleaning here and there, or mothers with their children.
Natsume decided that he likes the park because there were no paparazzi chasing him like he was the most handsome and rich bachelor in Japan. On second thought, he IS the most handsome and rich bachelor in Japan. 'And powerful, intelligent, and-..' Natsume was cut off from his vain illusions (which were true anyway) when he let his eyes wander away from the trash can to settle down at a five foot and two inches tall dude ('Or maybe it was a girl?' Natsume didn't know) wearing a potato mascot suit handing free mashed potatoes to people who comes past him or her.
"Huh.." Natsume continued to stare and his stomach grumbled. His cheeks flushed in embarrassment. He got up and went over to the stand to see the potato mascot sighing. "Can I have one?" He asked; trying his best to be polite. The potato mascot didn't answer, and it just stood there like it was taunting him.
"CAN THIS DAY GET ANY WORSE!" He shouted. The people at the park glanced at him for a second before they returned to their business after they received a penetrating glare from Hyuuga Natsume.
The potato mascot stood straightly in shock; as if it were sleeping.
"First, Ruka came at my house to find me asleep at the bathroom! Second, Ruka awoken me because of a damned party that I'am required to pay for that I didn't even knew about! And third! Kami, I can't believe this, a person wearing a damned potato suit is denying me FREE mashed potatoes! FREE!"
From his last birthday, Ruka gave Natsume a book called 'Anger Management Issues: How To Control It'. Natsume was secretly grateful for it, but he didn't have much time to finish the book, but that didn't mean he didn't read it. And the book was right. Screaming all your troubles away at the wind sure do helps.
But in his case, he shouted all his problems at a person he haven't even met wearing a potato suit. He shrugged his shoulders inwardly, because it worked too anyway.
Mikan has no idea why this raven-haired, red-eyed stranger was yelling at her like a maniac. 'Maybe he escaped from the mental hospital?' Mikan felt scared, but she felt obliged to hand the screaming, older guy a cup of mashed potatoes. "Um, here."
The man glared at her before snatching the cup of mashed potatoes from her. He angrily pulled the plastic spoon from it and shoved a large amount inside his mouth. Mikan watched as the strange man continued to mutter things such as 'blondes', 'imbeciles', and 'parties'.
Suddenly, the stranger's phone ringed. He grunted and handed Mikan the cup, and yet again, Mikan had a feeling that she needed to obey or he will bite her head off. She took the cup and watched as the man growled at the caller.
Then, she heard a woman shouting at the other end of the line, "NATSUME, HOW DARE YOU GRUMBLE AT YOUR OWN MOTHER!" Mikan sweatdropped, 'So he got the trait of screaming from his mother..'
"I'am eating mashed potatoes, okaa-san. Can you please call me later?" Both of them heard the gasped from the other end of the line. "Natsume! Oh, dear Lord! Didn't you know! You are allergic to potatoes!" And right after that statement, he dropped his phone to the ground, and his face turned red. Mikan watched in morbid fascination and horror as his red eyes rolled to the back of his head and he fainted.
That's when Mikan decided to scream.
"HOW THE HELL DID YOU END UP WITH THE RICHEST MAN IN JAPAN TO FAINT RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU WHEN YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HANDING OUT MASHED POTATOES!" Sumire screamed at the top of her lungs. The other's wouldn't be surprised if she was heard by the birds flying innocently at the air.
Everyone was outside of the room where Hyuuga Natsume was currently sleeping at; Mikan, Sumire, Anna, Nonoko, Koko, Yuu, Kitsuneme and Mochu. Wakako was not present with the group since she was currently on a vacation. Without Mochu. Her boyfriend. She's so affectionate, isn't she?
Mikan was feeling guilty as Anna patted her back. "Don't worry Mikan, I'd still be giving you the double salary." Mikan sighed and said, "It wasn't my fault that Hyuuga Natsume was allergic to potatoes." Nonoko nodded, supporting her friend. "Yeah! And who's allergic to potatoes anyway?"
"Hyuuga Natsume." Koko plainly replied. Sumire smacked his cheek with her left hand to keep him quiet. The gang heard foot-steps and they all turned their heads to where the source of the noise was coming from. They saw the slim figure of Hyuuga Kaoru running from the hall with men dressed in black and with dark sunglasses trailing after her. The usual bodyguard get-up, the gang presumed.
The woman barged inside the hospital room and shouted, "HYUUGA NATSUME!" Yes, Mikan was now sure that Natsume inherited the shouting gene from Kaoru. They didn't even have to eavesdrop to hear what was happening inside.
Natsume awoke with a start with the voice of Kaoru shouting his name. "Okaa-san, what are you doing here?" Kaoru glared at his son. "The question, young man, is what are YOU doing HERE!" Natsume grunted as he took on a sitting position at the bed. The boy didn't respond as he sighed.
"Natsume, are you are aware of the fact that you'll make headlines? Headlines saying 'CEO OF HYUUGA CORPORATION HOSPITALIZED BECAUSE OF MASHED POTATOES'! And you fainted in-front of a girl wearing a potato suit! A potato suit! I heard she brought you here while wearing the suit and riding a taxi cab!"
The bodyguards and the gang found another resemblance between Natsume and Kaoru Hyuuga: they both detested embarrassment. And so when Natsume heard all that, he fainted again.
A/N: Hallo, dear reader! Thank you very much for taking the time to read this oneshot :D It was inspired by my sister while she was eating baked macaroni and my brother and I were trying to get some. My brother mentioned mashed potatoes, and I was like: ALL HAIL POTATOES! This is a oneshot, and if anyone is interested for this to be a chapter-story, I'd gladly do it. That is, if lot's of people wanted to! Reviews are love!
P.S: Some elements are quite related to my other story The CEO And The Dork