Fanfic APH Denmark x Norway- Leave out all the rest
Hetalia
Song: Leave out all the rest-Linkin Park
AN: human names, character death, I don't own Hetalia or the lyrics of the song ^^
Mathias was laying on the hospital bed near the window. There were all kind off machines attached into him. He heard the door opening and he looked towards it. "Hey Norge~!" Mathias gave his usual smile to the Norwegian, who was entering the room.
"Hey...How are you feeling?" Lukas looked at Mathias who was only a shadow from his old self. Lukas still didn't believe this. When Mathias was diagnosed with leukemia, Lukas just refused to believe it. No. This couldn't be happening. Not to his Mathias.. "I'm feeling a little better thanks to the medicine." Mathias still smiled even though he knew that he would die soon.. When he had heard that he was sick and would die, it had been a huge shock to him. Still Mathias had made a decision to keep on smiling no matter what. He wanted everyone to remember his smile, especially his dear Lukas. He didn't want to break down, because Mathias knew that behind that emotionless mask, Lukas was feeling sad.
"That's good to hear." Lukas sat next to Mathias' bed. He had been with the Dane since he was taken in to the hospital few weeks ago and hadn't left his side since then. Lukas only went to get some coffee/ food and to take a shower, but he was never away longer than an hour.
Today Lukas was feeling a little better because Mathias was clearly having a good day. The Dane had bad days and good days. You never knew which one was going to be next. Last few days had been really bad and Lukas knew that the end was coming closer all the time. He still refused to believe that his happy Dane was going to die. Their days often went on with Mathias talking and Lukas listening to him. They talked about random thing, but Lukas refused to answer if the subject went into dying and that soft of thing. "Norge... I have a list, how I want my funeral to be.." Mathias took out a list from the table and handed it to Lukas. The Norwegian looked at the list and took it without a word. He put it into his pocket and looked at Mathias. "Don't worry about it." Lukas said to Mathias while looking into those blue eye which he fell in love many years ago. "Norge~ Can we go outside tomorrow? They promised that it should be sunny tomorrow~" Mathias changed the subject smoothly.
"Sure, if you are feeling good tomorrow and the doctors give you the permission." Lukas held from Mathias' hand and smoothed it with his thumb. "Great, thanks Norge~" Mathias smiled widely. Lukas loved that smile and was happy to see it. He seriously hoped that Mathias would feel good tomorrow and they could walk together. "Oh yes, I have something for you, Norge" Mathias took out a small box with two rings. "I never had the time to get proper rings for us, so one of the nurses agreed to help me. Here, this is your." Mathias gave one to Lukas and put the other into his finger. "Mathias... Thank you so much. I love you" Lukas put the ring into his ring finger. "Tomorrow, I'll will give you a lot of kisses" Lukas smiled a little. They both were waiting for tomorrow now...
But that tomorrow never came. On the next day, Mathias was feeling really bad and he was really sick. The doctors even said that he might not live for the end of the week. Lukas was sitting next to Mathias' bed, squeezing the Dane's hand tightly while watching him sleep. Mathias opened his eyes slowly and looked at Lukas. He carefully sat up and looked at him. "Lukas...Am I going to die?" Lukas bit his lip and shook his head. "No. You are not going to die… You will get better. I'm sure of it." Lukas knew that he was just trying to comfort himself... Mathias looked out from the window. He knew that death was waiting just behind the corner. "Lukas...We both know the truth. I won't live long anymore..." Lukas shook his head. "No, you need to live... You can't die." Lukas looked down. He was slowly starting to realize that Mathias really wouldn't live long. He would lose the most important person in his life. Mathias started to hum a song and then he started to sing.
"I dreamed I was missing, you were so scared
But no one would listen,'Cause no one else cared
After my dreaming, I woke with this fear
What am I leaving, When I'm done here?"
Lukas turned his head towards Mathias. He knew this song. Lukas listened when Mathias sang. He squeezed his hand even more and bit his lip a little.
"So if you're asking me, I want you to know
When my time comes,Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some,Reasons to be missed"
Lukas started to remember things that he and Mathias had gone through together. The Viking age, Kalmar Union, all the mistakes they had made, all the fights, everything. Especially the wrong that Mathias had done when they were in an union. Lukas had forgiven them long time ago, but he still remembered them. He just looked at Mathias, without saying a word.
"And don't resent me, And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory, Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest"
Tears were now streaming down from Mathias' eyes. He was starting to be tired of being happy all the time. He was starting to realize that he was really dying. He could not see his friends anymore. He could not see or be close to Lukas anymore.. Even when he was crying, Mathias still continued on singing.
"Don't be afraid, I've taken my beating,I've shared what I made
I'm strong on the surface, Not all the way through
I've never been perfect,But neither have you"
Mathias turned to look at Lukas and smiled his usual smile, only this time the smile contained so much sadness. Mathias smoothed Lukas' cheek with his thumb and looked into those violet eyes that he loved.
"So if you're asking me, I want you to know
When my time comes, Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some, Reasons to be missed
Don't resent me, And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory, Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest"
In the middle of the chorus, Lukas finally broke down. He was realizing that he really would lose Mathias. Lukas squeezed Mathias' hand and cried against the bed. He couldn't hide it anymore. He wouldn't survive without the laughing and annoying Dane by his side. Lukas needed Mathias. He was the only one who got him to smile and enjoy from the life. Lukas cried louder all the time. Mathias smoothed Lukas' head. He hated to see his loved one this broken but he couldn't blame Lukas. He would also be broken if Lukas would be dying.
"Forgetting all the hurt inside, You've learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come, And save me from myself
I can't be who you are
When my time comes, Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some, Reasons to be missed
Don't resent me, And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory, Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest"
Mathias continued singing and smoothing Lukas' head. He moved a little and helped Lukas into his bed, by his side. Lukas immediately hugged Mathias and cried against him. Mathias continued on smoothing the small Norwegian's head.
"Forgetting all the hurt inside, You've learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come, And save me from myself
I can't be who you are,I can't be who you are..."
Lukas held Mathias hand tightly and hugged him. "You can't die.. I need you. I can't live without your annoying and always happy attitude. You can't leave me alone Mathias.." Lukas said against Mathias' shoulder. Mathias leaned against Lukas and held his hand tightly. He was feeling worse all the time. Lukas started to wipe his tears away. He could see that Mathias was feeling worse and he knew that the end was now closer than ever. "Lukas... I will miss you so much. You are the light of my life and I'm glad that I got to live with you and I'm glad that I got to be with you in these moments. Please, keep me in your memory and live on. And smile, because your smile is the most beautiful thing in the world." Mathias leaned into Lukas' shoulder.
Lukas looked at Mathias and turned the Dane's head towards his face so that he could look into those blue eyes that were once filled with joy and life. " I will miss you too. I will miss your happy nature everyday... Even though I always say that you are annoying, I haven't meant it. I have always loved you Mathias." Lukas placed a small, but loving kiss onto Mathias' lips. When he separated from the kiss, he smiled gently so that Mathias would remember his smile always. Mathias looked into Lukas' eyes and smiled his usual smile, without any hint of sadness in it. "Awwwh~ I love you too, Norge" Mathias kissed Lukas and cuddled against his shoulder. His breathing was becoming smaller all the time. Mathias was silent for a while and he just leaned against Lukas shoulder while holding his hand. "Lukas.. I'm tired. Can I sleep for a while? Will you wait here until I wake up?" Mathias said with tired and weak voice. Lukas understood what was going to happen. "Ja. I'll wait for you here until you wake up, Mathias. I love you so much…always. " Lukas bit his lip and smoothed Mathias head. Mathias smiled a little and nodded. "Thank you..." Mathias' breathing became weaker. Lukas still squeezed his hand and soon, he felt how the Dane next to him, took his last breath. Lukas felt tears burning his eyes again when he felt Mathias' grip from his hand loosening. "Keep me in your memory…leave out all the rest" Lukas mumbled while sobbing. He still smiled but deep inside he was broken and hurting. He just hoped Mathias to wake up, but he could feel the warmth fading from Mathias. Lukas knew that he would never be the same from the inside...
Epilogue~
Lukas was standing in the graveyard with flowers. He looked for the particular grave. He stood right in front of the grave and smiled sadly. " Happy Anniversary Mathias..." Lukas placed the flowers on the grave and felt tears in his eyes. He still had the ring that Mathias had given to him, in his finger. He looked at the ring and kissed it while tears were streaming down on his cheeks. "You will always stay in my memory and you left many reasons to miss you. I miss you so much and I will always love you Mathias Køhler…" Lukas looked at the grave and smiled at the grave, hoping that maybe somewhere, Mathias saw it and smiled his usual, goofy smile that Lukas missed so much. He then walked away from the grave with tears in his eyes, leaving a lonely candle to burn next to the flowers. On the candle read: "when feeling empty, keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest.."