Marriage Material - Chapter 1 What's Love Got to Do With It?
Claire POV
Whin Park. I come to this the park for the sole purpose of running. I don't usually run for exercise because, quite honestly, I hate running. Period. I don't care for it as a physical activity. I rarely even play tennis because it involves running. I prefer Yoga, Pilates or just plain, old fashion walking, down a shopping avenue, would be nice. This is our park. I choose to run here because it is where we ran together. "My heart wants to run here because it reminds me of him. It makes me feel closer to him." There, I've admitted it. Said it out loud, all be it only to myself. But, I have vocalized it, put my feelings into words. It's not my fault no one is around to hear the declaration, unless the red squirrels count. Everyone who has seen us together, tells me they've always known that I've had it bad for him. It's written on my glass face. Heart eyes his brother-in-law called it. Like a first kiss, the one you never forget. Well, I'd better get over it. Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, I am 36 years old. Too old for this shit.
You see, I fell. I fell for him hard and fast; like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute. Without a life line. The problem is, my feelings have never really been reciprocated. Which is alright, I mean, everyone has to be rejected at least once, right? The trouble is... He is my one. The one I have been waiting for. My one and only. All those lovely movies I watched over the years have taught me what to look for. I watched all the great ones fall in love on the Big Screen... Bogie & Bacall, Tracy & Hepburn, Newman & Woodward, to name just a few. A few on TV as well, Harington & Leslie, Heughan & Balfe and Dallas & Goodwin come to mind. I sighed and laughed and cried my way through all their movies and shows. They taught me how to whistle, be smart & strong, the power an amazing pair of blue eyes can have on one's heart and that true love conquers all, including time. They were my guides on the path to recognizing true love and how to embrace it when I found it. They taught me not to settle, that I would know my soul mate the moment we met and that's honestly the way it happened too. I looked up to all 6' 3" of that beautifully chiseled man, with auburn-red hair, that had partly come loose from queue it had been restrained in. His face, with a chin like Cary Grant (all be it covered in blood from a head wound) held the most amazing blue eyes that melted my heart into a molten puddle of desire. His soft, pink lips in possession of almost a frown that I just wanted to kiss away. His voice with it's growling, rough burr melded inside an Scottish accent that sent shivers down my spine. When our fingers accidentally touched, I swear to you, I saw Fireworks! Seriously.
XXJAMMFXX
I took 20 minutes to work through my stretches: Leg lunges, side stretches, calf raises and hip rotations. I did my waist twists, shoulder pulls and neck circles. All the things he showed me that I needed to do before I began each run. I felt all the kinks, pops and shifting of joints as I readied my body for my run. I felt muscles groan as I stretched and got the blood flowing; readying my frame for pain.
XXJAMMFXX
I have just come off 36 hours of rotations at Raigmore Hospital, where I am still currently employed as a Staff Surgeon. I volunteered to cover for my friend, peer and co-worker Joe Abernathy, who had to fly back to the States, unexpectedly; a Family Emergency of some sort. I like working in A it keeps my mind sharp and my skills honed. There is no routine; every day is different and provides new and unique challenges. You have to think quickly and sometimes off the cuff or outside the bubble. Right now I am wired on coffee. Double espresso, please, no cream, no sugar, thank you very much. That's what it takes to get me through a shift like that now. I'm not so young anymore.
XXJAMMFXX
I've finished my stretches and am ready to start my run. I pulled out my Iphone to find the play list I listen to when I run; the one he made for me, to encourage me. I noticed I have twenty-two missed phone calls, all of which left messages and over three dozen texts. One is from Joe, probably to tell me he and Gail landed safely at Boston's Heathrow. Some are from various team members, two are from Lieutenant Murray and one from his wife. I wonder how she got my number? One is from the Lieutenant-Colonel, or The MacKenzie as the team refers to him. He tells me to call him Dougal, but I don't. That would be about my resignation (is it considered a resignation if you quit before you've even started a job?). I have no less than seven calls and a shit load of texts from Murtagh (oh I'm sorry – that would be Captain Fraser), as I expected. That would be his godfather. And well, well... surprise, surprise... five are actually from him, the good Major, Mr. Matchmaker himself. I refuse to call him back. We are no longer friends. I deleted everything, without reading or listening to any of them, except the calls from Joe and The Lieutenant-Colonel. I will call The MacKenzie back Monday; I know he will be busy today and recovering Sunday. Today he will be celebrating and he will be good and drunk before darkness settles over the Scottish Highlands. I do not interact with him when he is under the influence of alcohol. I had one rather bad experience at his wife's Soiree so I steer clear of him when he has partaken in the consumption of libations of the alcoholic variety. None of what the rest have said matters any more. I made a mental note to delete the contacts when I got home. I just need The Lieutenant-Colonel to understand that I resigned from the team. I cannot work with him, especially after he returns from his honeymoon. It would hurt too much.
I broke my first rule... Never, ever, date a patient or a patient's direct family member and certainly never fall in love with one of them while you are very busy not dating them. Yes, well, truth is, we never actually dated, technically speaking. He never, officially, asked me out, though at the time I don't think I really saw our meetings as anything less than dates. Probably because that's what I wanted them to be, and maybe even allowed myself to pretend that's what they were. I wanted to be his date, his steady, his girl. I might have even been alright with a friends with benefits deal, if the deal was exclusive (there's an oxymoron, right?).
It started innocently enough, just a cup of coffee in the hospital's cafeteria to discuss his brother-in-law's recovery. Fifteen minutes slipped easily into an hour of conversation and laughter. Certainly not a date, his godfather was there the entire time. Several times I managed to arrange a need for a hot tea and quiet place to working on patient notes, that conveniently coincided with his arrival to fetch a hot beverage or snack for his sister. Twice I was invited to meet up with his team at a nearby pub after visitation ended. We always ended up sitting next to each other, quietly talking, as everyone played darts or billiards and drank. That's where the running came from. He suggested it as a way for me to work off the stress from my 24/7 job. As encouragement, he even offered to run with me. We met at this park maybe a dozen times in the two weeks Lieutenant Murray was my patient. All of that stopped the day his brother-in-law was released from hospital.
When the running thing started... I suffered through it because it became something for us; I could count on an hour or two of just he and I. No one else. Our constant chaperon, his Godfather, doesn't run you see. The only running he claims he ever did was while he was sitting on the back of a horse. He said it's call galloping. I mean, Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, I was running 5 - 6 miles a day just so I could be alone with the man. Seriously, who does that? Only an idiot, I suppose. That's when I admitted to myself that I was, quite possibly, hopelessly in love with the man.
XXJAMMFXX
On that pleasant thought, I jogged to the Great Glen Way . That's the path I use as a warm up; warm up the muscles and loosens the joints. Two laps are a mile. If I include the Bught Road path that runs the perimeter of the entire park, incorporating the Botanic Gardens and Bught Park Pitches it turns into approximately 2 ½ miles. 2 laps will make my ½ marathon workout. I try to run at least 5 miles a day, 5 days a week, in under an hour, which I have yet to achieve. On the 6th day, I run the full 12 (guess what day today is) and try for 2 ½ hours, which thus far has eluded me. On the 7th day I have off – I have to binge eat and catch up on my shows at some point, don't I? Besides, Sunday is the day of rest, right?
XXJAMMFXX
Recently, with the MacKenzie's job offer, running had turned into something I needed to do. It is a requirement for the new job I was to start in two weeks. Now I know it is an impossibility for me to work with him, hence the quitting before I've even started. Sadly, the sole reason I was willing to give up my job at hospital, was because this new position would allow me to work more closely with him. I was to be the Lieutenant-Colonel's team medic. Now I will leave everything, including this hospital gig, and take pretty much whatever offer comes my way, just to get me out of Inverness, Scotland and hopefully Great Britain. I just need to get off this bloody island. Shit, I'd even take something in America; I wonder if Joe still has any connections in Boston...?
XXXJAMMFXX
I received my nurses training from Her Majesty's Armed Forces. Signed up for one tour at 18 and was deployed twice. I was a field nurse and a damn good one. I was requested quite often and moved to follow the rotations of doctors that asked for me. Sadly, I learned, it was not just my nursing skills they were desirous of. I can tell you that I have slapped plenty of doctors in my time as an army nurse. When my tour was up, the army sweetened the re-enlistment deal with an offer to send me to medical school. That's how I became a doctor. So by 22 I was in medical school by 27 I was a doctor. A year later I went back for specialty training and at 30 I was a board certified surgeon. I worked my residency years in the A&E at the Field Hospital at the Army Reserve Center. I did not much care for the loudness and confusion of London, retired from the army as soon as I could and accepted a position at Raigmore Hospital in Inverness.
XXJAMMFXX
It was the team's Lieutenant Ian Alastair Robert MacLeod Murray that brought me to The MacKenzie's attention in the first place. I think his injury during a simulation is what showed the advantage of having someone with my skill set along for the ride, so to speak. Lieutenant Murray is his very own brother-in-law. Turns out Ian is the IT tech assigned to his team. Little did I know, that my first meeting with Lieutenant Murray, would change my life forever.
The MacKenzie was in desperate need of a Field Medic when they were running simulation ops and I more than met the medical requirements and he was equally thrilled with the fact that I was militarily trained. I already had the security clearances he needed to hire me and I had grown up in a mostly a nomadic lifestyle, moved around a lot as a kid. I was raised by an Uncle, Dr. Quentin Lambert Beauchamp, a noted field archaeologist and we traveled from dig to dig until I signed on with the military. I am also single, never married; no husband or kids to run home to. The good Lieutenant-Colonel was practically drooling by the end of our first formal meeting. At some point, because of my ability to triage and stabilize, as well as thinking outside the box in dealing in limited environments, I was told by the Hospital Administrator, Sean Greene, that Lieutenant-Colonel Dougal MacKenzie had a need for a weekend warrior, his words not mine, and the Lieutenant-Colonel had called in a favor and asked for me specifically. The hospital would loan me to the Lieutenant-Colonel on an "as needed" basis.
"Ye'll need to pass the physical, lass. Noth'n I ken do about that," The MacKenzie emphasized. "If ye can no' run 12 miles in under 2 ½ hours, ye won't pass and ye won't make the team" was the way he clarified any possible misunderstandings. So every day, for nearly three months, either before or after my shift's end, rain or shine, I would come to this park and run. I did it solely because I wanted so very desperately to work with his team; I simply wanted to be near the man. That all came to an abrupt end three days ago, the night of the Stag Party.
XXJAMMFXX
I will complete the circuit twice. In an hour or less. It's no longer because I need to but rather because I don't quit something I've started. I will see this training through to the end, prove to myself that I could do it. Today I will run that 12 miles in under 2 ½ hours and that will be the end of it. I will leave all of this behind. Him behind. I just want to complete the run, go back to my flat and fall into a coma for 20 + hours. I have to be back at hospital, Monday at 9am for a staff meeting. I will give Joe my resignation then.
I hit play, strap the Iphone to my arm, put my ear buds in and start my run. I will push for Marathon Pace. I won't last long, maybe only the half of the run but I need the pain. It won't be a relaxing run but at least it might be an anger reducing one. Maybe I will step in a puddle and it will swallow me whole. I note the time, 8:17am as I start down Great Glen Way watching for the Gaelic Tree Trail Markers. New Rules by Dua Lipa starts to play.