Chapter 1: Space Cases
Lloyd and Genis sitting around the porch of Dirks' house, enjoying the sun and relaxation.
Lloyd: I'm kinda glad the school got attacked. Seeing as it will take weeks, to repair it back to normal
Genis: I miss school. Wouldn't it be faster if we went and helped them rebuild it?
Lloyd: Hey, Genis, you know what they can't teach you in school?
Genis: What's that?
Lloyd: Shutting the hell up!
Dirk came out to check on the boys.
Dirk: You lazy excuse for a man! Get up and go do something!
Lloyd: But Dad, I am doing something!
Lloyd looked up and smiled, then back to the sky.
Dirk: What do you...oh great Heavenly Martel! Lloyd!
Genis: Whoa Lloyd! You nasty creep!
Lloyd: Ok, NOW, I'm not doing anything!
Dirk: When I come back out, I want to see you both doing something other then just sitting around, like a bunch of dead water slugs!
Dirk leaves.
Lloyd: So what exactly are we supposed to do?
Voice: Travel through Space and save the planet of Derris Kharlan from impending Doom?
Lloyd stood up, and pounded his fist into his hand
Lloyd: Hell yea!...wait what?
Genis: The voice came from that floating device, over there...and it sounded like your Dad...I mean Kratos!
The two looked out to the yard, where a small floating disc, hovered. And then a small zip of static and then a image of Kratos appeared.
Lloyd: Whoa...Dad! You're back?
Kratos(in a whisper, to someone): ...is this it? Well, I've never used this Skype thing before, Hanson...ok, there we go. (Kratos' serious manner), ahem! Lloyd...i see you are well.
Lloyd: Dad! What's up?
Kratos: I need your help, Lloyd. Derris Kharlan is in trouble and I can't do it alone!
Lloyd: Don't you have all the help with the half-elves?
A loud Crash could be heard and then an explosion.
Hanson: Master Kratos?...um...are you ok with a walk in kitchen from the control room?
Kratos face palmed himself
Kratos: Let's not go there...
Lloyd: We could help! Yeah!
Kratos: Good. I will give you the details upon arrival
Genis: How are we getting there, anyways?
Kratos: I have a small vessel ship, that you can use to travel here. Hanson...deploy the ship!
Hanson: Yes, Master Kratos...
A few beeps of buttons, let them know that Hanson was doing his duty
Kratos: The ship is traveling fast, so it should get to you in no time
Lloyd: How fast are we talking?
Suddenly, a loud crash in the garden, made them all jump. A small vessel space ship, crashed landed and destroyed the gate and part of the vegetation.
Kratos: ...
Dirk: What was that, Lloyd? I heard a crash...are we being attacked?
Lloyd: No, Dad!
Dirk: Are the neighbors kid throwing bombs, at the house again?
Lloyd: No, Dad!
Dirk: Was it a small, unmanned spacecraft, used to transport you to another world?
Lloyd: …...
Genis: …...
Kratos: …...
Lloyd: ...maybe...
Dirk: Ok! Be home for supper!
Lloyd: I'll try, Dad!
Kratos looked behind him
Hanson: …...I'm...just gonna go repair the kitchen, now...
The two grabbed their gear and jumped inside the ship
Intercom Voice: Hello and welcome to Derris Kharlan Airline! My name is Dawn, I'll be with you for the journey to the planet. Is there anything I can do for you?
Lloyd: Got any Candy?
Beep Beep
Suddenly a small window opened inside the ship and out popped...a flamethrower
Shoooooooooooo!
The flamethrower retracted back into the window.
Lloyd's head was a solid black, burnt and charred.
Lloyd: Lemme guess...Hanson?
Genis: Let's just get to Derris Kharlan, Lloyd!
The two buckled up and the ship blasted off. Dirk walked outside, a few minutes later, whistling to himself. He saw the destruction in the front yard.
Dirk: Darn that boy!...I just got finished repairing the yard, after my mother in law came by...
Back at Yuan's Base...
Yuan: Botta!
Botta runs in
Botta: Yes, Master Yuan!
Yuan: ...do we even have a part in this adventure?
Botta: I'm afraid not, Sir. Seems like this is more of a main party focus, story
Yuan: The fuck, man?
Botta: Yes, Master Yuan!
Yuan jumped up out of his chair.
Yuan: If they think I'm going to sit here and not be a part of the fun and action, they are sorely mistaken! To the Ship, Botta! Hahahahahahahaha!
Botta: ...um Sir...the ship is still in repairs...from last weeks...cruisin' for bitches...as you called it
Yuan: Awww yehh! That was some fun times! But we need a flying machine!
Botta: Shall I call a Space Taxi?
Yuan: I am a man of Royalty and high power! I do not ride in the peasants vehicle!
Botta: Um...well, I have my '96 Ford Truck...I can have it modified with some wings and whatever...
Yuan: To the Truck, Botta! Hahaha!
Botta: ...
Lloyd and Genis, were already halfway to Derris Kharlan, when they got an incoming message:
Kratos: When you arrive, I shall not be there to greet you myself, just yet!
Lloyd: Why not, Dad?
Woman: Kratos, honey...come back to bed, you wild man!
Kratos: ...
Lloyd: ...
Genis: ...
Kratos: I need to do laundry...
End of message
Back at Yuans' Base...
Botta had finished modifying his truck with wings and they were ready for blast off
Yuan: Alright Botta! Let us fly!
Botta(to himself): ...pompous little twerp...
Yuan: Botta?
Botta: Away we go, Master Yuan!
The truck roared to life, shot forward and lifted into the air.
Yuan: Aww yeah! We're going on an adventure!...In Space!
Botta: Yes, Master Yuan
Yuan: But it wouldn't be a road trip, without some tunes!
Yuan popped his ipod into the slot. He pressed a few buttons on screen.
(Hip-hop Music):
Got me bitches, got me hoes,
lick my fingers, curl your toes
got me feelin' up your body
got me doin' things all naughty
baby, you know you're my only shawty!
Botta: …...
Yuan: Aww yeh! Botta! This is how you party, on the road!
Botta: Yes, sir...(unenthusiastic), wooo...
The two, took off and were in hot pursuit of Lloyd and Genis. Meanwhile, they just arrived at the Planet, and were greeted by a man.
Man: My name is Trex. Nice to meet you!
Genis: So what exactly are we supposed to do?
Trex: Master Kratos, will be with you shortly, at the main hall. I am to escort you there!
Lloyd: Please tell me you have wi-fi?
Trex: Wi..fi?
Lloyd: Dear god...you people are boring!
As Lloyd and Genis walked, through the main gate of the Headquarters, little did they know that this would be the start of an adventure, that they never would have expected...
Yuan: Whoa whoa whoa! You didn't mention me? I'm coming too! Don't forget that I am the Great Yuan! If this story is to continue, I shall have a part in the conclusion of this chapter!
(Writer scribbles down an excerpt): Yuan tags along
Yuan: The fuck kind of description, is that?