Title: Blink At You In The Evening
Rating: Australian M. Couldn't figure the US.
Warning/Spoilers: Up to 5.01 and a shot from one of the promos. Angst.
Summary: Jo's heart breaks, again. AU.
Characters: Jo, Jack, Allison, with varying triangular pairings; Jenna.
A/N: So here's the thing: I am a gen-loving multi-shipper who adores Jo/Jack, Jack/Allison *and* enjoys Jo/Zane. Endgame is obvious; fanfic gets to differ. Therefore: we get angst for everyone.
Spoilers for 5.01 and the Season 5 promos. Utterly AU. Based on the idea that Bizarro Eureka was Actual Eureka and from Jack's horrified face at naked Jo. Un-betaed, so possibly funky tenses. Title from lyrics by Stars. Can't believe a) this is my first Eureka fic - given my history, I was expecting Jo fic that's not AU; and b) that I wrote it; I have assignments!
Blink At You In The Evening
Jo gets off work early. Jenna's with Allison (with her mom, and Jo can say it, she really can – she's never been Jenna's mom, she's never been called Jenna's mom [this is Eureka; everyone knows the story] – never mind the skinned knees and bicycle accidents and homework and the evenings she's spent curled up on the couch with a feverish little girl in her arms and a bucket beside them) and they're having dinner with a visiting Kevin at Café Diem.
It's been hard with Jack lately. She knows he loves her, they've talked about it and they're sure, and they're going to see this through. It's just… she misses him. Even before, with the kids, they had always managed to get time to themselves, but since everyone came back…
Jo's back in the house now but it's just too weird. They're still sharing the same bed. He hugs her every night and kisses her every morning but once they're outside the room, once Allison's around, there's generally a few feet between them. They'd both agreed to it, and god, she doesn't want to make things any more difficult for Allison – Jo's been there, with Zane, and Zane and Zoe, but at least she didn't have any kids involved.
Still, she misses him. And they haven't had sex since Allison moved in.
So, she has plans for tonight. She changes into some lingerie – well, half some lingerie: red and black lacy bikini bottoms, no bra – and pops on a black silk robe over the top. She then sits and waits at the top of the stairs.
Jack arrives home ten minutes later. The door swings open and he slouches in. He's rubbing his head, looking a little worse for wear, standing just past the bottom of the stairs, near the couch, gazing at the dining table. It's a little odd. Today has been calm – by normal standards, never mind Eureka standards. No explosions, no fires, no escaped animals fleeing GD. She's been doing paperwork. Far as she knows, he has been too.
She knows how to fix it. She gets up and slowly slinks down the stairs, watching him. "Jack," she says softly and a lazy smile stretches across her face. He slowly turns to face her and she drops the robe off her shoulders.
He stares at her for a moment, face blank in surprise, and she feels her smile widen. But then his expression changes and he looks at her in such shock and horror that she freezes. Her stomach feels nauseous and her head starts to spin.
"Jo, what are you doing?" he shrieks, and her heart stops dead.
Allison flashes a light in Jack's eyes and frowns.
Jo had thrown some clothes on and forced him into the car, calling Allison on her way to GD. Jack's been pestering her with questions since they left the house, looking utterly confused the entire time, but it's all she can do to get them there. More speech is a little beyond her.
"He's lost some time," she'd announced when they'd shown up at GD and she hasn't said anything since. Allison and Grace had rushed him in for scans and she was left with Jenna holding tight to Jo's waist. Kevin had offered to take her home, but Jenna had shaken her head and refused to leave. Kevin had nodded and then interrupted the women briefly to hug his mom, and then he'd hugged Jo and Jenna and left anyway – he had to get back to Harvard early the next morning.
"What do you last remember?" Fargo asks Jack, frowning at him from his spot near Jo's bed. She's just sitting on it, watching Jack, Jenna curled up beside her. Allison and Grace are close to his bed and Henry, Fargo and Holly were all gathered round. Fargo had been automatically notified when Jo had opened the med lab - entering the security emergency code - and Holly had shown up with him. Jo was half-waiting for Zane to turn up, so that he could watch her life fall apart too.
Jack squeezes his eyes together, then half opens them, brows furrowing as he thinks. "Henry was running some tests to see if he could figure out where you'd gone. It's been, uh, five weeks since the Astraeus- since you all disappeared."
Allison shakes her head and smiles softly at him. "It's been four years, Jack. We got back three weeks ago but it had only been minutes for us."
Jack gapes at her then catches sight of the two of them on the bed and Jo watches his eyes widen as he realises just who the little girl is. "Jenna got big," he says, voice surprised, but he smiles at her, eyes crinkling. Jenna just tightens her arms around Jo and buries her face into Jo's side. His face falls and he swallows, turning back to the others. "Okay. How?"
"Temporal anomaly," Henry suggests. "That experiment, the one he's talking about… did involve some transdimensional properties, and he ended up unconscious for a while."
"Could just be a concussion," Allison says, and flicks the light in his eyes again, drawing his attention back. He squints at her and pulls away from the light, but can't take his eyes off her. They're full of wonder and surprise and delight and his fingers twitch, and Jo knows that all he wants to do is touch her. To touch Allison and make sure she's real.
Jo pinches herself. This certainly feels fucking real.
Grace frowns at Allison. "There's no sign of one on the scans. In fact, he seems perfectly healthy."
Allison shrugs and the two of them get involved in a brief discussion, throwing around words Jo chooses not to listen to; she wouldn't understand half of them anway. Henry places his hand on her shoulder while they're discussing it and she shrugs away from it. He smiles sadly at her but she just looks down at Jenna, stroking her hair. She appreciates what he's trying to do, but if she accepts any comfort right now, she'll just fall apart. Eventually Grace and Allison decide to keep him overnight.
Jo takes Jenna home.
They have a Tuesday night ritual. It's about three and a half years old, started when Jenna was just getting into numbers, and they've managed to keep it going since then. Even during the last few weeks, they've been keeping it consistent, trying not to cause any more upheaval for Jenna. It might be a pipe dream at this point, but Jo is going to try.
This is how it works: Jo buys three different packets of M&Ms, mixes a suitable amount into a bowl, and leaves it on the table. After dinner, Jack and Jenna sit down at the table, and go through the M&Ms, separating them out into three different piles: one pile of the peanut M&Ms for Jack, two even mixed piles of dark and milk for Jo and Jenna. Originally, it had just been done by the two of them counting them out together. Lately, Jenna has been throwing in some algebra, seeing if her dad could keep up. He has been, but it's been getting more entertaining.
Tonight, Jo puts the candy out on the table as per usual. Jack and Allison had got home that morning and Jo had explained the ritual to him, hoping to just… keep keeping things normal. After dinner, Jenna sits expectantly in her chair, swinging her little legs back and forth. Jack smiles at her and sits beside her and they begin. Jo watches from the side of the room; Allison watches from the other end of the table.
Something goes wrong. Jack sneaks a peanut piece to eat and Jo realises she forgot a rule: Jack never sneaks peanut. God, how could she forget that rule. (Easy: because it's never been spelled out. It's one that just evolved.) He never sneaks peanut, because those are his. Jenna can and will and Jo can walk by and grab one (and throw out the math so that they have to start again) but Jack doesn't. He can sneak dark chocolate and milk chocolate – and that's almost half the game – but never peanut.
Jenna doesn't say anything but her eyes grow hollow and she excuses herself to go brush her teeth.
Shit.
Jo moves to go after her and make sure Jenna's all right, but then she makes the mistake of looking back to the table. Allison and Jack are holding hands across it.
Jack sleeps on the couch for three weeks. Then things change.
He goes into Jack and Allison's, formerly known as Allison's, formerly known as the guest's (once Zoe had okayed that it was no longer hers), bedroom. Her room turns into Jo's, formerly known as Jack and Jo's.
Her home life turns into hell.
She can't leave.
She realises this the first week. Three days into… whatever this is, and Jenna has a nightmare. The three of them show up at her bedroom door, half-asleep and horrified at the terrified shrieks coming from her shaking body. She's struggling in her bedsheets and all three of them move towards her, but then all three of them hesitate. Jo's not her parent, not technically, though practically she may as well be and normally she would go to her, but Jenna's parents are here. Jack is her dad – the papers say it – but not the Jack that's here, right now. Allison is her mother, but she's never seen her child scream like this.
Jenna wakes up and she's babbling about aliens taking people and returning them – and oh, Jo is so going to be speaking to Kevin about being aware of where he's watching TV; they'd been through this once before when Jenna was three and he'd developed an obsession with old school Twilight Zone; aliens, really? – and then those people never being the same. Jenna's eyes widen as she takes in the mother she still doesn't quite know and the stranger in her dad's body and then she leaps towards Jo.
Jenna spends that night, and the following three, sleeping in Jo's bed.
Zane shows up at the door once on his own. Exactly once.
She punches him, and he doesn't show up again.
He's already broken her heart.
She does try to leave though, one time. It's been three months; Jenna hasn't had a nightmare for two. Jack and Allison are well and truly JackandAllison at this point, though they're doing what she and Jack had been doing when Allison had first come back. Jo's fairly certain they fuck though.
They have to try. She has to try. But every day she feels like she's slogging through quicksand, only it's her heart that's holding her back. She's underwater and she's hurting and she doesn't know if she can get through this if she has to stay in this house. SARAH suggests she give Zoe a call to see if she can visit and Zoe tells her of course – however long she needs. So Jo packs her bag and asks to put Jenna to bed – and god, that hurts too, that she has to ask – and JackandAllison nod at her.
Jo sits beside her and sings 'Mockingbird' as she tucks Jenna into her bed, laying her purple blankie on top. "Love you, baby pup," she whispers as she gently kisses Jenna on the forehead.
"Love you too," Jenna murmurs and she rolls over and falls asleep.
Jo sighs as she meanders down the stairs. Jack's waiting for her at the bottom; Allison has disappeared. His eyes are red and he just looks tired.
"Jo, don't go," he says to her and she wishes he were saying it for any other reason than guilt for something he doesn't quite understand and can't remember.
She reaches up to his face, and places her hand against his cheek. But the look in his eyes doesn't change, and she jerks her hand away, almost as if she were burned. She shakes her head and turns away.
"I have to," she says, and she does.
She spends nine days with Zoe, sleeping on the floor of the apartment that she shares with two other med students. Zoe keeps her entertained when she hasn't got school – full of stories about boys, and her studies, and things that matter when you're twenty-three and going to be a doctor – and Jo just does the tourist thing when Zoe is in class. Jo's phone keeps registering calls from SARAH, and Jack keeps calling Zoe, but Jo ignores it all.
She's just hopped out of her morning shower on the tenth day, when her phone rings again. This time, however, Jo recognises the number of Jenna's school and she hurriedly picks up the phone.
"Yes," she nearly barks, her heart rate speeding up, and oh god, she's worried. Was Jenna sick? Had she broken her arm? She'd advised the school before she left that she was going to be out of town, so why were they calling her now?
"Joey?" a little voice whispers on the other end. Jenna.
"Jenna? Jen. What are you– How did you–"
"Joey, when are you coming home? Did I– did I do something bad?" And Jo swallows, her stomach dropping. Oh, god. Oh, god. Jenna was blaming herself. For all that they'd tried to keep her out of it, keep things normal, Jo had left and her girl, her baby pup, was blaming herself.
Screw Jack, screw Allison, screw herself – she will have to deal and get over it. This is her little girl in every way that matters, taking up so much space in a heart ready to burst, and Jo knows she won't be staying away. She can't.
"Sweetheart, I'll be home soon."
One and a half months later, there's a Eureka disaster – physics and time involved again – and Jack is knocked out cold. He is rushed to GD – how original – and doesn't wake up for a few hours. Zoe's visiting and at home with Jenna but Jo can't leave the med room. Even if she's not his partner anymore – and she means that in all the ways that it can be taken – she still loves him.
She'd tried not to; she really had. If she thought about it, the situation hadn't been so different from going to 1947 and coming back to… not her Zane – who became kinda her Zane, who she had then grieved. She had refused to try again with him after he'd shown up at the door. It was all so fucked up and their friendship had already imploded, let alone anything further.
Still, she had tried to stop loving Jack, had been on a few dates, but it just hadn't stuck. So she's here, waiting.
When he does wake, Jack stares at Allison in confusion. She's beside his bed, clasping his hand loosely, and his eyes flick quickly between their hands and her eyes. He looks around the room, catches sight of Jo, and his face relaxes. Jo claps her hands over her mouth. He… that look. The look in his eyes. She hasn't seen that look in months. He smiles at her, eyes reddening, and she just knows.
An odd feeling passes through her and she thinks for a moment that it could be hope.
He returns his gaze to Allison and his eyes widen and he looks between her and Jo.
"Crap," he whispers, closing his eyes. "I remember it all." Then he's looking apologetically at them both.
And Jo realises that while she and Allison have previously been in the same spot as each other, they're now in it at the same time. Whatever hope may have been there, there's also another crack in her heart.
She doesn't know where they'll go from here.