Disclaimer: I dont own Naruto
Spring
It already spring and cherry blossoms started to bloom. Dark haired shinobi sits idly under the large cherry blossom tree, unusually killing the time doing nothing. His dark orbs gazed at the falling petals over him, and as one of it fell on his lap.
"Sakura" he murmured. Just the sound of her name brought back the memories.
His unforgettable and painful memories.
This time while he idly killing the time he cant help but bring back the memories. He hated to live in the past, but only this part of his life calm and take him away from his solitude. But he's afraid he wont be able to move on, that by remembering her will only stop him from moving on.
"But Sasuke-kun don't you think its time to move on? To accept everything that happened? And let it go?"
"Endulge yourself with it and don't be afraid to remember, besides its part of moving on"
He also believe this is one way of moving on, like she'll always says.
So, he'll always tolerate it.
This is also the same time of the year when he met her. They were in the same team together. Him, Her, Naruto, and Kakashi.
I hate her when I first saw her. Her presence just brings annoyance to me. She never done anything wrong to me but she did a good job in upsetting me. But I know she's innocent and oblivious of that.
Her unusual pink hair
Her jade eyes
Her vulnerability
All about her.
I despise her
I hate her for being so carefree.
But then when I looked at her, I felt this weirdness. I'll just suddenly feel nervous, anxious, happy, and whenever Naruto flirts with her I felt my anger rising. I hate her smile, specially when she smiles for Naruto, for Kakashi even for someone who is simply an acquaintance.
How can she smile for everyone?
Then there it goes again, these weird feelings inside me. I felt like a greedy man who only wants everything for himself. I felt like I don't want her to smile anymore. Weird isn't it? I just want her smile to be exclusively for me. Now, this is what a greedy man feels.
I hate this.
I am not supposed to feel like this. I am supposed to focus on my training and become stronger to kill that bastard. But when I looked at her big, innocent pools of jade, I felt like I was pulled inside, it was so bewitching that it can easily took away my concentration.
I hate this.
She's so weak so how can I harbor such affections for her. Yeah, now I admit I am physically attracted to her, but that's just it. She's so weak that she cant even protect herself. And we end up protecting her instead. In our chuunin exam, I cant take it when some bastard lay their hand on her. Again, these weird feelings took my sanity and beat the bastard sound ninja.
Is this what you called love? I need her but I don't need a weakling. I love her but then again I hate her. I am full of contradictions. And I hate this.
I know… She's the one who is patiently taking care of me when I was in the hospital. When I was needy, she's is always the one beside me. I love her for that but I hate her because she makes me feel vulnerable. Whenever I don't feel her presence I feel uneasy and miserable. Is this what you called love?
"Suki desu!"
"I have loved you for so long, Sasuke. Please don't leave me!" she's crying. Oh God! I hate it when I see her like this, her precious tears falling from her eyes, flowing freely down on her cheeks. I hate her when I make her like this.
"Please, let me come with you.. I promise I'll make myself useful.. Just don't leave me"
she looked at me with those tear-filled eyes. She is shaking. Again, I can't. I can't afford to see her hurt, so its better to leave her here. I can't lay her life on the line. I can't take is when I lost her.
Is this what you called love?
I don't know what to say at that time.
"Thank you"
"I'm sorry, Sakura" he kissed her on her forehead and bid his goodbye.
A dull smile formed on his lips. "I love her but
How can I
… I hurt her"
"You're annoying"
"I despise weakling like you"
How can I say those words?
Maybe I am just a coward. I have loved you the day I met you but afraid to admit it. I am afraid I would just hurt you.
Uchiha is finally back!!
"hn" I see so I'm here again. Back in spring of Konoha, when cherry blossoms are in their full bloom.
I wonder if everything's changed. I looked around and the city is still the same when I left. "I came back for good" I know it very well. But I don't feel accomplished. I felt emptier more than before. Empty and lost that I don't know now why I am living why I am still breathing. What I am for.
"Cherry blossoms huh?"
I just realized that these weird feelings didn't disappear at all. At that time, I saw her unusual pink hair, her jade eyes, her frail figure; everything about her that I hate, my heart starts on pounding. I wanted to hug her and tell her how much I miss her. I want to stroke her full pink locks framing her heart shaped face. I saw her looked at my direction, and saw the surprise on her jade eyes. I saw those impending pearl of tears, I don't know if she's happy or extremely sad now that I'm back. What pains the most is when I saw her holding the hands of that certain white-eyed Hyuuga. Just then, I felt as if something pierce my heart deeply, my throat run dry, and I know if I try to voice out some words, I know my voice would cracked. I am certain now that I missed a lot here, after being gone for 5 years I should expected things would never be the same.
I tried to keep my cool and greeted them, "her" with a nod as an acknowledgement. I would not dare to say anything for now as long as I am not yet ready.
I saw her now walking towards me, wiping her flowing tears with her curled hands which I found cute. She looked just like Sakura back in 5 years ago.
"Sasuke-kun" she looked at me with those eyes, crinkling as she gave her sweetest smile for me. God, how I missed those eyes.
"Okaeri, Sasuke-kun"
She never really drops that suffix –kun. That time a little hope emerge within me, that at least there is one thing that never changed. I hoped.
Everyday feels like back when I was still a gennin. Naruto is always noisy, and I always call him 'Dope'.
"What is it teme? Don't you dare call 'dope' the future Hokage of Konoha" he is still in his over energized personality. Doesn't he ever got tired with his antics? I was shocked to know that Hinata and him are going out now. A shy type and a loud-mouthed? I chuckled, opposites really attract.
"Neji, here. You should take care of yourself ne?" she was thoughtfully fixing his scarf around the neck of blushing Hyuuga.
There it goes again, as old folks says don't raise your hope. I felt again this killing pain. I tried to stop this but failed miserably.
"Hey Naruto?"
"Hm?"
"How's Sakura? I mean" I looked at her direction and tried to act normally as I can. He followed where I am looking, and got the hint.
"Ah them?? There's nothing to worry buddy. They're just friends, but you know I think Neji have something for her. You know" he eyed me suspiciously and grinned widely and evily.
I cannot help myself that night.
I cannot even rest my soul, as always she is forever annoying.
"Ne? Sasuke-kun?" she is there standing behind him. "What are you doing here? Come on" she looked at him wondering. She sighs and took my hand. "Come inside. It's cold here"
I don't know what comes into me, but as she took my hand I pulled her to my side and hugged her. "I've always wanted to do this, Sakura" I know I caught her off-guard. I breathe in the scent of her shampoo and caressed her shoulder length rosy hair.
"A..ano….. S-Sa..suke..-kun"
"I missed you"
"A..ahh… I … cant br..eath"
I released her and looked the other side. I know she is smiling, grinning widely.
"I'll go now" I was about to take my leave when it was my turn to caught off-guard. She is there hugging me, whispering the things I longed for her to say "I missed you too.. I missed you so much" and planted a kiss on the tip of my nose. I cant help but smiled at the time, this time I'm sure that the only thing I am afraid of losing is still here.
When almost everyone turns their back on him
She still stays with him
Care for him
Wait for him
Love him
"Sakura"
She just looked at him plainly, "Huh?"
This time I am certain. This time there is no point of hesitating. She makes me angry. She can bring me into darkness in an instant. She can bring happiness in me with just her smile. And she makes me feel loved. She makes me weak. I hate her for that. But I love her. I love her more than anything in this world.
"Love me"
She gave him hope to live
She is his light
"Nani? Sasuke-kun?" again she gave me again that puzzled look.
How he needs her so much
"Damn" I uttered.
"Dammit.! I love you Sakura. Cant you see I'm-" I felt her soft fingers on my lips.
How he finally utter those three words
"Hai Hai.. I know. I love you too atashi no Sasuke-kun" she smiled at him.
"I hate you" I mumbled. I really hate this girl who makes me feel this way.
"But I love you" I remember that passionate kiss I shared with her. The emptiness I felt was gone and replaced by over flowing contentment and happiness. This what I called life. Thank you for everything. Thank you for bringing me to life
How he started his life with her
"Ohayou Sasuke-kun"
"Take care"
"I hate you Sasuke no Baka!!!"
I missed her so much..
"Sasuke-kun you don't have to tell me.. I love you.. I love you so much.. I thought I already said that to you"
She slapped her not-so-widely-forehead with exasperation, "Sasuke-kun, you shouldn't overworked yourself. You should take care of your health. If I hadn't bring you lunch here I'm sure you're going to eat that unhealthy ramen again. God, Sasuke-" she's really cute even she's nagging him, even though she's angry. Unknowingly, a grin is forming on his face.
"What the hell are you smiling-"
"You're cute even you're angry" I whispered to her ear. Blush crawled up to her face. Before more nagging comes from her I got her lunch box and started to eat it. I looked at her annoyed face, "I just wanted you to deliver my lunch personally" her face getting redder. It's the truth, as an Uchiha I am born arrogant, I just like the different reaction on faces of other men. "How is it?" she really looks like a child, I cant even imagine that this attractive woman is actually a kunoichi.
"It's delicious"
This where we used to eat our lunch.
"Sasuke-kun"
A smile formed on his beautiful face. A sad smile. He leaned on the tree, their silent witness of their unending love. He closed his eyes and feels the breeze. He opens his eyes partially and looked at his side. He can still see her sweet smile as she leaned on his shoulder.
"Sakura"
I can still hear her melodic voice calling his name. I can feel her sitting there beside me, smiling and holding my hand but -
…..
I know its imposible
All I can feel now is the cold marble under my touch. The engraved name under my fingers.
Uchiha Sakura
I hate her again. For making me feel this way. I always feel like crying. And again I feel this emptiness.
"Sakura"
I stood up and brushed all the dust from my pants.
"Happy Anniversary"
"No words can express how much I love you"
"Don't worry. I am taking care of my self...
but you know ...
..I missed you so much"
"Happy Anniversary too.. My Sasuke-kun.." she tries to stop herself from crying but tears are flowing again from her eyes.
thanks..
i know this kindda sucks... but comments are welcome..