Before the Dawn:

A Princess Bride Fanfic

Part I: A Plan For Sweet Revenge

Humperdinck clenched his teeth and tightened his grip on the arms of the chair to which he was tied. He wasn't even sure how she should be feeling. Angry, of course. But at what, whom? He had never even loved Buttercup anyway. In fact, he'd planned to murder her. So why should it upset him that a black-clad pirate and a bloodied, triumphant Spaniard had taken her away?

Well, there was the fact that said Spaniard had murdered his most trusted officer, Count Rugen. And said pirate had threatened him in most atrocious ways, called him a 'warthog-faced buffoon," and left him alone in the honeymoon suite tied to a chair.

He muttered something under his breath and yelled for his soldiers. "Guard! Guard!" A man came racing in.

"Yes, Prince Humperdinck?...Oh my...how..."

"'How' is none of your business. Just get me untied and ready my swiftest horses."

"Horses, sir? Why horses?"

"'Why' is none of your business either. Just. Get. Me. Untied. Now!"

"Um, right away sir. Sir, may I respectfully inquire who did this to you?"

"The Dread Pirate Roberts. And his friend, the Spaniard, the Inigo what's-his-face that killed Count Rugen not two hours ago."

"Who? The Dread Pirate Roberts is a legend!"

"Indeed he is. Mayhap that is why he is so powerful."

As soon as he was free, Humperdinck stood. "Well, what are you waiting for, spring? Ready the horses!"

"Yes, milord!" A twisted smile crept over Humperdinck's face as his perfect plan unfolded in his head. He would chase them down, herding them over the Guilder frontier. Buttercup would be killed by one whom he would claim was a militiaman of Guilder. That Spaniard, whatever his name was, (he would probably quote it again eventually), would be brought back to Florin and hanged for murdering Rugen. And Humperdinck would have the pleasure of dueling that blasted pirate 'to the pain' - and winning. Thus would all his enemies be beaten, his war with his next-door neighbor country conveniently started for him, and his sweet revenge had.

"Your horses are ready, milord."

"Good, good, I will be ready momentarily. Summon Yellin, my captain-of-the-guard. I have an...interesting...proposal to make him."

"Aye, sir. Yes, sir. It will be done."

Humperdinck could not get that twisted smile off his face as he changed from his wedding ensemble into his hunting clothes and took up his best sword, a sword he called E Le Valdin, which in a myth from long ago had been the name of a king of Florin. The name itself implied power, power that brought with it almost infallibility. Infallibility! Of course. For he could not fail now. And he would not. I will not allow myself to be beaten again by a scruffy black-clad pirate who probably didn't have the strength to stand.

The captain-of-the-guard met the prince in the courtyard. "You asked to see me?"

"Ah, Yellin, yes I did ask to see you. I have a proposal to make to you."

"Yes?"

"Would it interest you...to take the place of the unfortunately late Count Rugen? As my advisor?" Yellin appeared shocked.

"Why, my liege! You would really accept me to such a prominent position?"

"Yes, indeed! Your first assignment..."

"Yes?"

"Housesit. Ensure the castle is guarded - well guarded - in my absence. I don't care if someone does set himself on fire trying to break in, guard the gate."

"Yes Prince Humperdinck!"

He rode out, under a now-risen sun, bringing with him a company of twenty-five men. Twenty-five against three - well, technically, I think their giant bodyguard counts as two. Anyhow, I still have over four times theirs. I will ride nonstop until I catch up with them, surround them late at night, commence a distraction that will get their giant out of the way, overpower the swordsmen, and somewhere in there, give a signal for someone to fire a crossbow at the girl, then of course later say that was Guilder. Oh! I hadn't thought of it before, but if that pirate really does love Buttercup, surely her death will knock him off-balance, giving me a distinct advantage. Hm. That wasn't so hard to think of.

Then again, I am brilliant.

They crossed the Florin/Guilder border in high afternoon, sometime around three o'clock, and caught up to Roberts' party late at night. Although Humperdinck had originally planned to wait twelve hours before springing his trap, to make sure they suspected nothing, overconfidence caught up to him and he sent his men out to surround the party. "A few more miles tomorrow," the Dread Pirate said, "and we reach the bay where I anchored the Revenge. We jump on board, pull off, and we're home free!" That's what he thinks. "Inigo, have you considered my offer any more?"

"I do no' know, Wes'ely. Truth be told, I never really considered piracy."

"Oh, come along, my friend! You'd be great!"

"I'm-a no' really cut out to be a captain, Wes'ely." My distraction should be ready...

"Well, I'm not either really. It's something you have to...What in the name of...Fezzik, please go see what is out there."

"O.K., no problem."

"Oh, Westley," Buttercup said nervously, "you don't think it's..."

"Nah," the Spaniard said quickly. "Methinks...Madre de Dios!"

"What is it, Inigo?"

"Did you a-hear that?"

"No..."

"Excuse me." Humperdinck wondered what the Spaniard had heard. "You 'ere! What you doing?" Um, wonder no more.

"Nothing, my good man, I am merely out for a walk."

"At night? In Guilder? Wearing a Florin commandairs uniform?" This Spaniard was cleverer than perceived.

"You are cleverer than perceived, my man."

"Thank you."

"Who are you?"

"No-a-one of consequence."

"Of course not...unless you happen to be Inigo Montoya?"

"Well, well! You are cleverer than perceived, my man. And you?"

"No-one of consequence."

"Of course not...unless you happen to be Prince Humperdinck?"

"Of course I am! And now that you have guessed it", he added, "I suppose I have to kill you. Unless of course you surrender."

"And if I do, I imagine you will probably have me killed anyway?"

"Maybe."

Montoya pulled out his sword. "Hallo," he said slowly, "My name is Inigo Montoya. You...you..." He seemed lost for words. "Anyway, prepare to die." With that, he launched into a sequence of attack moves, some of which even the seasoned fighter Prince Humperdinck had never seen or learned. The prince was losing all his advantages quickly. Apparently being brilliant was not such a big asset when you were fighting a saucy Spaniard named Inigo Montoya who used moves you'd never seen.

He backed up, coming to the edge of a very, very, long and steep hill. Montoya grinned - and plunged his sword into Humperdinck's sword-arm. The prince fell backwards, going tumbling down the hill. Upon landing, his head struck stone, hard. **** it, was the last thing he had time to think before everything went black.