(Author's note: Y'see, this is what happens when you are super bored/distracted at work, and you have a notebook app on your phone. You write. A lot. In any case, as usual, SPOILERS for the DIVINE BEAST NABORIS QUEST and the MASTER SWORD QUEST! Also, I'm posting this so soon after posting Son because I beat the game last night! It was epic and anticlimactic at the same time, and there was nothing more satisfying than seeing "Defeat Calamity Ganon Complete" pop up on screen!

(Lastly, I had a lot of fun writing this. After failing so many times at this part cause I kept getting caught, and being amused by the banana-eating ninja, I couldn't help but write this. So, as usual, enjoy!)

Sneaking, Ninjas, and Bananas

His breath came in clouds. The tips of his fingers were numb, his muscles tense as he peered over the edge of a crate at the patrolling Yiga Clan members. He had to give them credit. They had really good hearing, but they never, ever looked up.

Especially when bananas were involved.

He recalled the guard in the previous room dancing at the sight of bananas placed just right so that Link could slip by him.

This, however, would be more difficult. More sentries patrolled his way forward. Not everyone would stop for bananas. He'd be caught and jailed alongside the poor Gerudo guard he'd found. Or worse, he'd be killed, brought to Ganon, or a number of other things that would officially cease his quest to save Zelda.

He sighed softly. A gentle nudge of encouragement came from the sword on his back and he grinned. The Master Sword had faith in him at least, even if he didn't.

He shivered and fished out another bunch of bananas - what was it with the Yiga and bananas anyway? He waited for a moment and tossed the bananas into the line of sight of the guard patrolling near the ladder that was his goal. The guard froze, staring at the bananas, then danced forward. He crouched and began eating. Link readied to jump from his perch and glide toward the ladder.

"Hey!"

Link froze, his heart in his throat. Oh, no, he'd been seen!

"Dude, lemme have one," the voice continued. Link glanced down. The guard circling his perch had approached the one currently stuffing his face. Link cursed silently. He'd be seen if he moved now. Perhaps there was another way...?

"Nah, these are mine. Get your own."

"Sharing is caring." The guard reached for the bananas, but his friend held him at bay.

"Gerroff me! These are mine."

The banana-less guard gave up, huffing. "Fine. Keep 'em. Be mean. Where'd they come from anyway?"

"Um...up?"

Both looked up, as if hoping for more bananas to fall from the ceiling.

Right into Link's face.

"What in the-?"

Link cursed. He had been watching and waiting for another opportunity to move, but hadn't expected to be caught like this. He scrambled to his feet, attempting to book it out of the chilly caves before he was caught. He'd need to come back later. He had to, if he wanted to free Vah Naboris. Whistles and bells went off.

"Get back here, you sneak!" someone shouted.

The Master Sword sent a thrill of alarm, just before a guard popped into existence before him, cutting his path off. Link skid to a stop, one hand on his sword. "Well, well, lookie here." The guard, clearly smirking, ate the last of the banana he held. "Thanks for that, buddy. I needed a snack."

He threw the peel over his shoulder and advanced, drawing a really nasty-looking blade. Link looked around, saw he was cornered, and prepared to fight for his life.

"Dude, he's got a Sheikah Slate on his hip!"

"Aw man, we actually caught Link!"

"Master Kohga will be thrilled!"

"I'm not some little prize for you to gawk over," Link snarled. "Bring it, cowards!"

"Very well." The banana guard nodded. A heavy force slammed into the back of Link's head, and he collapsed, dazed.

"Nice one!"

"Think he's got anymore bananas on him?"

His world darkened, and he fell into unconsciousness. The Master Sword called him awake sometime later, but his head hurt too much to focus on opening his eyes. Instead, he drifted on thoughts to the peaceful grove where he had gotten the sword. The Korok Forest was surely a wonderful place. So peaceful. So quiet. He had even heard the voice of the Master Sword, welcoming him back, expressing her gratitude that he was alive and well.

And the Great Deku Tree's memory...poor Zelda. He was a failure of a knight to let his princess fall. To do what he was supposed to do. Yet, she had seemed determined in the memory.

And the message she had wanted passed on to Link. What was it? She what? Wished him well? Hoped he would come soon? That she would wait for him? ...That...that she loved him?

He mentally scoffed. She could hardly stand his guts, at least one hundred years ago. Why would she love him? The notion was ridiculous.

Before he could decide what the princess was going to say, the Master Sword called to him more urgently. A loud, echoing sound pulled him into full consciousness, but he stayed still, as if he was still under. He took in his surroundings as best he could. The floor he lay on - face down - was cold. His arms were tied tightly behind his back. The comforting weight of his various equipment was gone. Soft footsteps met his ears as they closed in.

"Still out," a rough voice snapped. "And quit eating those! You're going to be as fat as a Goron if you keep it up! Save some for the rest of us!"

"But they're soooo good!"

"Whatever. Help me out. Maybe he'll wake on the way to Master Kohga."

"Nom."

Two pairs of rough hands seized him under his arms and started pulling him along. Link, unsure of what was going to happen, let his body hang limp.

"How hard did you hit him?" the banana guard asked.

"Hard enough," his companion, the grumpy, banana-less guard, replied.

The two traveled in silence, and Link cracked his eyes open a slit to observe the passage to this Kohga person. After a few minutes, and hoping that his boots would not get holes in the toes as they were dragged along, he was pulled through a doorway. He shut his eyes again, just in time, too, as the guards dropped him unceremoniously to the floor.

"Ah, this is the sneak, yes?"

"Yessir, Master Kohga," the guards chorused.

"Looks scrawny. Honestly, we could just throw him in with that Gerudo."

"Well, we thought you'd like to see his gear," Banana said.

There was a rattling, and Link sensed the Master Sword very close. "Hrrm...no bananas? What kind of person doesn't carry around bananas?" Kohga huffed.

"He did. This numbskull took 'em all out and ate half of them," Grump replied.

"Oh, well," Banana sang.

Kohga continued. "And this? What kind of shield is this? And he's pilfered our bows. And, oh? The Master Sword?"

"Yessir. He has a Sheikah Slate, too!" Grump crowed.

"Turn him over." Link was roughly shoved onto his back. "Yes. This is him! After all our time searching for him, he shows up here!"

"Should we kill him?" Banana asked.

There was no verbal response. Instead, only the ringing of steel. The Master Sword let out a jolting mental cry of fear for her Master. Link dared to crack open an eye and saw one of his captors was leveling a sword over his chest.

He sprang into action, sweeping his feet behind the Yiga guy's legs. He took advantage of their shock. He rolled, grabbed the Master Sword, popped to his feet, and performed an ace spin attack on the two guards.

Quickly gaining his bearings, he pointed the sacred blade at the rather chubby Yiga Clan member, while keeping the other two in his sights. "Hand over the Thunderhelm and no one gets hurt," he snapped.

"As if. We stole it fair and square. It's ours now."

"I won't ask again."

"Neither will I."

"Let's dance."