Standard Disclaimer: I do not own Once Upon A Time, or the characters in this here story. This is done purely for entertainment purposes.
-Michelle

There was still just a bit of chill to the air, there merest whisper of cold that sent tendrils of wind caressing through his hair. It was just enough to make Hook shiver, the man pulling the collar of his jacket tighter about his neck. The wind continued it's play, lazy eddies of it catching hold of a stray napkin on a table. Hook watched the wind make it dance, the napkin bobbing and weaving, going up high, only to drop down low, but never quite stopping. It wasn't a particularly strange or unusual sight, and it certainly didn't seem worth more than a second of his time. But Hook stood there all the same, the luxury of time his to now waste.

A smile hinted at his mouth's corners, Hook watching the paper napkin dance. It was an odd quiet moment he took for himself, and it was all the more special because it was Hook's choice to make. That was something he hadn't had a lot of in the weeks leading up to this moment, so much taken from him. His emotions, his choices, his freedom, and even almost his life, Hook now had a new appreciation for just about everything around him. From the absolutely ordinary, to the outright outstanding, Hook alive and able to appreciate it now.

His returned heart so full of that overwhelming appreciation, Hook cast his gaze skywards. The stars were still out, those twinkling lights finally free of their perfect alignment. The pirate thought he breathed just a little bit better to see their course scattered, the stars no longer aligned in such a way as to do Hook any real harm. The danger was passed, and Hook was stronger to have survive it.

"I told you, Swan. I'm a survivor."

Hook had done as he had told her, the words spoken not only meant as a reassurance but as a promise. He had thought his words had had the intended effect, but now Hook wasn't so sure. Because he remembered the smile Emma had given him, and the wealth of sadness in it's expression. She hadn't been able to look him in the eyes after that, mumbling some feeble excuse about Regina needing her. He hadn't argued, Hook not wanting to push for too fast, too soon but letting Emma walk away, and on this of all nights? The word difficult didn't begin to describe it, and he couldn't at all claim to understand it. If the situation had been reversed? If Emma had been the one to nearly die? Why the last thing Hook would have done was to ditch her to spend time with someone who didn't much like him. Especially not to spend time with Regina, Hook not understanding why Emma would go to console HER and not him. Hook WAS the one who had almost been killed tonight, and he was supposed to be the one that Emma cared for.

Supposing it was Emma's way of shutting down, of protecting herself from any further hurt, Hook still didn't like it. How were they ever supposed to become more, if Emma kept pushing him away? If for every step he took forward, Emma lurched back a whole five? It was exhausting the amount of effort he had to put in, always chasing her, always trying to make her believe. He'd been through the wringer, just trying to gain a place in her heart, every scrap of affection and attention nowhere close to enough. He wasn't demanding sex from her, but he would have liked a little bit more than the brief kiss they had shared.

He was longing for the intimacy of a true couple, the touches and the words, the gentle reassurance that Emma should have been giving him. He had survived the worst of the crocodile's schemes, had nearly died, and HAD been forced to do Rumplestiltskin's evil bidding. Hook wanted Emma to hold him, to comfort and reassure him. And the pirate knew he wasn't going to get that. Not tonight, not tomorrow, and certainly not once Emma demanded a full accounting of all Rumplestiltskin had made Hook do.

His hand and his hook dirty, the pirate wasn't looking forward to the details revealed. He had killed because of Rumplestiltskin, the entire court of the Blue Fairy wiped out in a mere instant. He'd never forget their screams, or the way they had been torn apart by the hat. Hook would be haunted forever by the lives he had stolen, and by the look in the Blue Fairy's eyes the moments before she too had been broken down into nothing but magic.

Her eyes wide with fear, the Blue Fairy had known she was helpless to do anything. She hadn't even tried, had barely muttered more than a soft plea, and Hook hadn't been able to resist the pull of Rumplestiltskin's command over his heart had had. He had been helpless, a slave to the crocodile's whims, and had nearly succeeded in damning a whole town in the process.

When thought of in that way, maybe it was wise of Emma to avoid him. She wasn't going to be happy with what Hook had been forced to do, and a part of him feared Emma simply wouldn't be able to forgive him for his crimes. He hoped that wouldn't be the case, but it WOULD fit Emma's pattern of behavior, the woman using this as an excuse to push Hook away.

The mere thought of Emma doing that, brought a tightness to his chest. An unpleasant throb of emotion, Hook recognizing the downside to having his heart back. Because just as he could feel and appreciate life and all it had to offer, he could now suffer the downside, the pain of an unrequited affection, a love that wasn't being returned in the way that Hook needed. He didn't want to assume the worst outcome, but Hook was bracing for it all the same. Just as he thought Emma was, the woman having ditched him to run off with Regina. That none of this was fair, didn't make it hurt any less, Hook scowling up at the stars, his good mood gone.

The tension that had been with him these last few weeks surged stronger now that he had a heart to feel it with. All his anger, sadness, and regrets wrapped around him, Hook hating the crocodile even more than he had previously thought possible. Because it felt like Rumplestiltskin had cost him another great love, Emma perhaps as lost to Hook as Mila was. He didn't see how she could forgive him, for the murders, the town, and most of all, for endangering her son.

Feeling completely screwed over, Hook couldn't yet muster any cheer at the thought of the own private hell Rumplestiltskin must be going through. Belle had been beyond livid, the beauty more furious than Hook had ever seen. Her normally sweet toned voice had been like steel, her blue eyes bright with a combination of hurt and anger. She had worn his betrayal like a sleeve, the dagger clutched in her hands. Hook might have laughed at the shock and dismay on Rumplestiltskin's face, if he had had his heart to feel with at that time.

But he hadn't, and by now the novelty had worn off, Hook tired and worried, and maybe just a little too bitter to truly laugh. Maybe he'd never be able too, Hook's life in nearly as much shambles as Rumplestiltskin's. The pieces might never be picked up, might never fit back together again, and Hook could only hope that Emma would be more forgiving than Belle had seemed inclined to be.

A part of him marveled over the quiet fury that had been Belle's. He had truly never believed she had it in her, had never thought Belle had had that much spirit. He had always thought of her as doormat, a naive innocent blinded by true love. Always quick to believe the best in Rumplestiltskin, Belle hadn't faltered in her beliefs even at the reveal that the man that she had loved, had killed his own wife in cold blood.

There had been no sign of that stubbornly blind girl, the naive light gone from her eyes. In it's stead had been a steely eyed determination, the hurt from Rumplestiltskin's betrayal demanding a reckoning. Hook had seen the look in Belle's eyes, seen the anger and betrayal on her face, her heart breaking and had known. Belle wasn't about to back down, or be manipulated, her eyes open and seeing Rumplestiltskin for what he really was. Hook couldn't feel sorry for Rumplestiltskin, but he did feel it for Belle, her only crime that of loving a monster.

He felt more than just sorry for her. He felt a grudging gratitude, Hook recognizing that Belle had done what no one else had been able to. She had saved him and his heart, Rumplestiltskin unable to crush it, unable to complete the spell, unable to do anything but stand there and panic. Hook would never forget that moment, never forget the sound of her voice, Belle all but snarling as she had wielded the dagger and taken command of Rumplestiltskin. Her appearance had been that of an angry, avenging angel, Belle's arrival completely unexpected, downright miraculous and Hook hadn't been much of a thought in her head. Belle hadn't saved him because she liked Hook, no. She had done it because it was the right thing to do, the only choice for a hero to make. Hook was learning more and more about those kind of choices, abut the kind of self sacrifice and deed that went hand in hand with being good.

His heart wasn't there yet, but neither was it solely that of a villain's. Existing in some in between state, Hook had seen the black stains of his soul, but also seen the ripe red of hope coloring his heart. It might have been rotten once, but now it was something more, something on it's way to becoming better. HE was becoming better, Hook recognizing he still had a long hard road ahead of him. And whether he walked it with Emma at his side or not, Hook realized it was a path he still wanted to take.

Such a path had no room for selfish thought, Hook realizing to prove worthy, he had to make amends. He had to say and be sorry for the things he had done, the people he had hurt, and that didn't just mean for the time he was under Rumplestiltskin's thrall. Hook had done plenty of bad things all on his own, had hurt many people, quite a few of them living in this very town. He needed to be sorry, had to set things right, the first step the hardest but he took it all the same. Towards the woman who had saved him, that avenging angel who should have wanted him dead.

Belle.

She first appeared in the distance, a mostly dark yellow blob of color. That yellow was her jacket, Belle having buttoned it up from top to bottom, and still she shook from the cold. The wind teased her hair, blowing strands of it around her face. Hook spied the still fresh tears, the red rimming her eyes, but not so much as a sniffle escaped her. He watched her determined walk forward, her chin lifted in proud defiance. Rumplestiltskin was nowhere to be found, and it was as much a relief as it was jarring, Hook having expected the monster to be trailing after Belle, begging for her forgiveness.

It then registered that Belle was on foot, that her tired shaking legs were making her stumble more and more. Hook then remembered the last words she had spoken, of how she had commanded the monster to take them both to the town line for some privacy. He had no clue what could have happened next, but it was appallingly clear that Belle must have been walking for a long time indeed.

Hook moved without thinking, catching Belle on her next stumbling step forward. She immediately stiffened in response to his touch, and the way her lower lip began to tremble, Hook feared she would start openly crying.

But Belle proved stronger than that. Her lip might be trembling, but no fresh wave of tears betrayed her, her inner upset remaining her own. Hook had so many things he wanted to say, so many things to apologize for, and to thank her for. Instead he asked the most pressing question on his mind, Hook morbidly curious as to what had gone down between this woman and Rumplestiltskin.

"What...what happened, where is...?"

It was hardly the most eloquent of utterances, but Belle took to his meaning immediately. "Gone." She said abruptly. "I forced him over the town line. Don't worry, captain. He won't be threathening you any more. Not you, not anyone, not even me..."

Again her lower lip trembled, Belle seeming more angry than anything by her reaction. Hook stared at her, then moved when she did, trailing after her.

"Did you walk all this way?" He asked her, and got a curt nod as his reply. "But that's..."

"Miles I know."

"You need to sit down." Hook told her, and she shook her head. He then reached for her arm, intending to lead Belle over to one of the benches situated under the main street's night light. She tried to shrug free of his grip, still shaking her head resolutely no. "Don't tell me no. Not about this. Not when you're so clearly ready to collapse!" His tone was fierce, Hook all but dragging her down onto the bench.

She resisted him every step of the way, and even once he had pushed her down, Belle retained that stiff, unyielding determination. He realized that it was her way of shielding herself, Belle trying to keep from a complete emotional breakdown.

Hook wasn't sure he was equipped to deal with her pain, but felt he had to try. He OWED it to her after all, given what she had done for him. He sat down next to her, and stared straight ahead, noting the closed shops across the street. Belle's own gaze was drawn to one in particular, to the pawn shop that had been her and the crocodile's home.

"Belle..."

"I don't want to go back there." She whispered. "I don't..It's too much of a reminder..."

"Then don't." Hook interrupted her. "I'm sure there are plenty of people you could stay with. Your father, your friend the wolf..."

"They all tried to warn me about him." Belle stated in a dulled tone of voice. "They all said he was nothing but bad...that he was a monster, a villain, and that he would hurt me in the end like he hurts everyone else. I listened to their words, and I was so arrogant. So confidant that I would be different, that he would be different. I thought...I thought my love was enough, that I could change him, that he wanted to change..."

"He's a fool." Hook was blunt. "A power hungry coward and a fool. It's not your fault that he didn't change, that he didn't want to change."

"Maybe. but I...I made too many excuses for him. I over looked too much." Belle admitted. "I'm as much a fool as he is."

"I don't know if I would go that far." Hook tried a smile out on her. "You're young, and you were in love..." She visibly flinched at that. "Love blinds us, makes us strong but also makes us weak. It's not wrong to want to believe in the best of the person you gave your heart to." He smiled again. "Just as it's not wrong to want to be the best for that person too..."

She fixed him with a sidelong glance. "Is that what you're trying to do? Be your best for Emma's sake?"

"Well yes. But I also have found that being the villain has never satisfied me. It just left me bitter and hollowed out, chasing after a revenge and the death that would follow. I wasn't enjoying life, hadn't for a long time. I guess in a way I am a fool too because I waste so much time."

"But you're not wasting time now." Belle noted.

"Well I am trying not to." Hook allowed. "Especially now that I've been given another chance. A chance that I owe all to you." Belle looked down at her lap at that, and Hook nudged her shoulder with his. "I want-NEED to thank you for that."

"I didn't do it for your thanks..."

"I know. You did it because it was the right thing, the only thing a person like you could do. You're a hero Belle, and you're reasons for doing it, doesn't change the fact that you did save me. You kept my heart from being crushed, AND you got me another chance at life and making things right this time around. It's a chance I am not going to waste."

"Good, I'm glad." A rare glimmer of a hesitant smile was seen, Belle seeming to soften just an iota. "It wasn't all for nothing, if something good can happen as a result of my mistakes."

He smiled back at her. "I am going to do my best Belle. To make myself worthy of the chance you gave me. I can't at all promise I won't misstep and stumble, but..." Hook shrugged. "I don't ever want to go back to the man I once was. That pirate with a heart so rotten he hadn't been able to appreciate anything, not even the life he was living."

"Not that it was much of a life." He admitted with a soft chuckle. "I was so focused on my revenge, on the grief I was feeling..."

"How DID you let go?" A curious Belle asked. "How did you work through your grief?"

"For many years, longer than I care to admit to, I didn't." Hook answered her. "In some ways I still struggle with it, but I found when I let go of my need for revenge, I let go of a lot of my regrets over Mila. I won't lie and say I stopped hating him for what he had done...But I no longer thirsted for Rumplestiltskin's blood."

Belle was quiet at that, looking down at her lap again. The faint glimmer of a smile had gone from her face, Belle making fists on her lap just before she made a demand of him. "Tell me." She said. "Tell me all the things that he made you do..."

Hook winced in reply. "Are you sure about that, love? It's nowhere near pretty, and it's most likely going to make you hurt more than feel better."

"It WILL hurt." Belle admitted. "But it also might help...if only to remind me of the kind of man Rumplestiltskin truly was."

"If you're certain..."

"I am." She looked up and locked eyes with him. "Please Hook, do this for me?"

"It's the least I can do." Hook sighed, then responded to the confused look in her eyes. "I'm not kidding when I say I owe you. It's a debt I can't possibly begin to repay, and what I have to say won't do you any favors. It'll hurt more than help, and that's a fact."

Belle was frowning. "You don't owe me a thing." She protested.

"Which is all the more reason why I do!" Hook insisted with a gentle smile. "It was a selfless act..."

"It may have been, but I never wanted...never intended..."

"You have it all the same." Hook told her. "Not just for tonight, but for all the came before, all the hurt I did to you, all the ways I tried to use you against him. I can't ever say I am sorry enough, may never be able to truly repay you, but I am going to try!"

She was staring at him open mouthed. Hook wasn't a man to blush, but he felt sheepish all the same.

"You're looking at me like I am talking crazy."

"Well maybe just a little..." Belle said slowly. "That or Emma Swan has got you so addled." She seemed to look around, as if just noticing the main street was all but empty. "Where is Emma anyway?"

"Emma..." He fought to hide his displeasure. "She had...had to do something with Regina."

"Regina?" Belle blinked rapidly in surprise. "I cant say I don't question her choices, given what almost happened tonight. I mean, I don't see how she can stay away, how she can NOT be spending every second with the man she had nearly lost." The next was said almost too softly, Belle looking the saddest since Hook had made her sit down. "I certainly wouldn't be able to do it...stay away I mean."

Uncomfortable now, Hook turned away. "She's...She's the Savior, and that means I have to share her with the town." But it felt like he was making excuses.

Belle didn't argue against his words, to Hook's relief, the man leaning back in his seat. Belle's words lingered inside him, the woman having made the same kind of observation Hook had been having earlier. Because he too wondered why, HOW Emma could stay away, how she could not be spending every second with him, how the blonde could deny them both a chance for a deeper reassurance.

He didn't know and if Hook was honest, there was a part of him that really, really didn't like the rejection he sensed in Emma's actions. But Hook didn't voice any of this to Belle, keeping his own worries and doubts locked within. Instead he began to tell her what Belle wanted to know, starting with the first attempts at blackmail, and leading all the way to what had happened after Rumplestiltskin had taken his heart.

Bravely enduring the list of lengthy crimes and misdeeds, Belle's worst reaction was to let her eyes fill with tears for the fairies. Hook had to look away then, ashamed of himself, ashamed of what he had been forced to do. But in the end, Belle had placed her hand on his, and given him her understanding. It wasn't an outright forgiveness, but Belle hadn't hated Hook for what he had done, what he had had to tell her. He could only hope Emma was half as understanding, Hook fearing the future, what tomorrow's dawning would bring.

To Be Continued...eventually?

So yeah...idea that I have had stuck in my head since the winter finale. Like a day after it started bothering me. It wouldn't let go of me, so I had to write it out, at least the start of it. Anyway, this is Hook Belle end game, with a side helping of Swan Queen end game. It kinda really bugged me that the writers didn't have Emma spend more time with Hook. She almost lost him for good that ep! And instead she goes running off with Henry and Regina?!

Anyway! This is supposed to be about Hook feeling he has to repay Belle for what she did for him. My plans are Rumplestiltskin comes back, and Hook tries to protect her from him. I actually have this weird idea that Hook and Belle maybe go on a weird road trip, on the run from Rumple. But we'll see. I need to get back to updating my other stories right now. XD

I also feel like this chapter sucks pretty bad. X_X But hey, at least I have a title for once!

-Michelle