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Harry Potter and the Queen's Guard Dog
What if Lord Voldemort's actions caught the attention of a certain queen? If so, what would happen if she sent her Guard Dog to investigate (and if necessary, eradicate) the problem?
-OCTOBER 31, 1981
It was a truly terrible night for the Potters. It had started so well, but soon went down the drain. I suppose, it all began that morning.
-3 in the morning-
James Potter, also known as Prongs, woke up with a mischievous grin on his face. He had an idea. In fact, it wasn't just an 'idea,' it was an 'IDEA!' One that involved some of his most favorite things in the universe: magic, pranks, his son, and his Marauder friends. He had a plan that, if done properly, would let him get some more revenge against one certain greasy dungeon bastard, ahem, bat, known as Snivellus Snape. Oh he couldn't wait for the warfare to end! Then he could go back to making the git's life a hell on earth.
'What had the man to deserve this,' you may ask. And the answer is….. Absolutely nothing. James Potter had a one-sided prank war against Severus Snape for a few irrational reasons. One, the guy was a git. He put on airs that only a pureblood, and a powerful one at that, should. James may not be the most humble pureblood, but even Sirius agreed that Snape was a bit full of himself. Two, he was a Death Eater. I mean come on! He had to be. Dumbledore may say he was a spy and all, but Snape was still too dark for James's liking. That guy gave you shivers every time he looked down that beak of his at you. Oh! And also, the guy was hideous. Not only was he was too poor to buy proper clothes, but he just didn't care how he looked. Also, he had the worst facial features. He was pasty and had a beak for a nose. His shoulder length hair was greasy and always smelled like potions. His teeth were crooked and yellow and his breath stank worse than his hair. If it wasn't for the fact that he sometimes went outside in the day, one might wonder if this greasy dungeon bat was in fact a vampire.
Well then, back to the prank….James knew that the prank had to be good. They were adults now, well at least physically, and they needed a more refined and elegant prank. No launching the git head first into the lake, even if the guy really needed a bath. Hmm… maybe he could… No! That would be too cruel…. Well… Maybe…
"James, Honey?" Lily Evans, the light of James's world, questioned rising up from her place beside him in bed, breaking his train of thought. "Is there anything wrong?"
"Nah! Just thinking of good pranks," James rolled over, hugging her"
"Go to sleep, oh! And think about it when your brain is less foggy." Lily let out a sigh of contentment before collapsing back on to her pillow, already out like a light. James decided to take Lily' advice and go back to bed. Pranking the Bat could wait for later….
-Three hours later-
"Harry James Potter! Get off that broom! You are going to kill yourself or worse! James, Sirius, Remus, Peter, someone, DO SOMETHING," Lily Potter's Weasley-esque bellow could be heard over the hysterical laughter of the marauders and little Harry's shrieks of happiness. His Nebula 25 zoomed in circles, knocking over vases, which Lily rushed to catch. Finally, Lily Potter nee Evans gave in and used her last resort.
"PETRIFICUS TOTALUS!" Harry James Potter dropped like a stone, the grin still frozen on his sweet angelic little face. Lily caught him sat him in his chair, and unfroze him. Once he could move again, Harry began to bawl. His tiny pudgy baby face screwed up and he turned currant red. He shrieked and shrieked until Sirius decided that he'd use his own ways of consoling the boy. Turning into a Grim, Padfoot leaped at harry, knocking him of his chair. Padfoot began licking Harry head to toe, giving the now laughing baby a slobber bath. Lily unfroze from her position of abject horror and snatched Harry up from between Padfooot's paws.
"Sirius Black! I don't know how you got chosen to be this boy's godfather, but I am definitely not happy about it! You have fangs and could accidentally bite Harry. Grow up, Padfoot!" Lily lectured. She sat Harry down and began to make his breakfast: An egg, banana and strawberries, and a Sippy cup of milk. Harry cooed delightedly, his brilliant green eyes lighting up at the sight of the strawberries. He reached out a small hand to grasp the strawberry and stuff it in his little pink mouth. Harry happily devoured his strawberries, and then his egg without being too messy. With his banana, though, he failed. It somehow managed to end up down his cute blue shirt, in his already wild black baby locks, all over Padfoot, and everywhere but his mouth. Lily sighed exasperated, as Harry took a chunk of fruit and stuck it in Padfoot's ear, giggling madly as the enormous black canine ran in circles trying to get it out. Chuckling, Remus pointed his wand at Padfoot and muttered, "Evanesco" Harry pouted as everyone else sighed in relief. James chuckled and remarked "That's my boy, already getting into mischief isn't he?" Padfoot, now recovered, changed back into Sirius and replied, "Well, I always say that Prongslet inherited your mischief and gravity defying hair, and Lily's eyes. Let's just hope that he doesn't have Lily's temper." He barked out a laugh before turning deathly pale.
"Now, now, Sirius, I do believe that you want to be able to procreate one day," Lily stated deceptively soft and cheerful. "I know quite a few castration charms that can work on you in either form. Sirius whimpered, backing away. "Now, I'll give you ten seconds to get out of my house before you make me test some on you." Sirius didn't need a further warning. He turned and ran yelling "I-I-Have to g-go! I-I'll see you later," as he scampered out the door and apparated away. Everyone laughed, and Remus groaned and got off the couch. "I also need to leave now. I have to get to work. James, Lily, I'll see you later. Happy Halloween!" He turned and apparated walked out the door, calling the night bus. Peter squeaked and scampered out, yelling, "Remus, wait for me!"
James and Lily laughed, and James got up and headed for his office. "Well, now they're gone, I'll revise our wills one last time. Anything you want to add, Lily?"
"Make sure Harry never goes to the Dursleys."
-Dinner-
"Ah," James sighted happily. "That was a delicious meal." Lily nodded distractedly, cleaning up Harry's mess. Well, let's get ready to settle in. James went over to the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of fire whiskey. He poured himself a glass, sitting down on the sofa and opening up The Daily Prophet. James scanned some articles and snorted. "Some things never change," he muttered. "Even in times of war, the ministry is a bunch of incompetent fools." Lily smiled and picked up Harry. Settling him in his crib, she cooed," Aren't you a good boy! Who's our savior? You are! And even saviors need sleep. So nighty night!" Harry cooed back before settling down and falling asleep. Suddenly, a bang came from downstairs. Voldemort was here! Meanwhile downstairs, James was trying his best to fend Voldemort off. He sent his best curses at the Dark Lord, only for him to laugh and bat them off, just like one might swat away a pesky fry.
"Lily, take Harry and go! It's him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off!" James yelled to his wife, dodging a Crucio. Voldemort sneered and raised his wand once more at James, this time ready to kill. In the last millisecond of his life, images and thoughts raced through his head. In a sort of detached zone, James regretted not being able to play one last prank on Snape. As le looked around his abode one last time, he noticed the rat cowering in the corner. Pettigrew! He turned again to face Voldemort.
"AVADA KEDAVRA!"
-Upstairs-
Lily sobbed desperately, hearing the two fatal words. Her husband was dead, and soon, so would she. Quickly, she barricaded the door and waited. Not a moment later. The door was blown off its hinges. Standing in the doorway was the Dark Lord Voldemort. He was tall and thin and would have been good looking if not for his distorted features. His once angular nose was now flat and snakelike. His once lovely dark eyes were molten red. He looked waxy and thin, and his lustrous black hair just served as a contrast to his hideous features. Grinning gleefully, he stepped forward. Lily whimpered, but drew her courage and stepped between him and Harry.
"Not Harry!" she pleaded desperately. "Not Harry! Please not Harry!"
"Stand aside you silly girl," Voldemort said, sneering. "Stand aside now!"
"Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead," She shrieked. Voldemort just brushed past her. She ran back in front of him crying, "Not Harry! Please have mercy!" He leveled his wand at her. "Have mercy!"
"Very well, he responded quietly. I'll give you mercy. AVADA KEDAVRA!" Lily fell, like a doll with its strings cut. Voldemort glanced at her while laughing a high cruel laugh. He turned toward Harry and pointed his wand at him too.
"AVADA KEDAVRA!"
-NOVEMBER 1, 1981-
"Dumbledore - you can't. I've been watching them all day. You couldn't find two people who are less like us," Minerva McGonagall ranted. There was no way Prongs Jr. could go to the Dursleys. That would be too cruel. But it was no use. Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts, Supreme Mugwump, and Chief warlock of the Wizengamot, just shook his head and twinkled. Harry James Potter had to stay with the Dursleys. It was the only place that would keep him safe from death eaters. The child wouldn't be treated well at the Dursleys, Albus knew that much, but it was more important for the Boy-Who-Lived to be kept out of reach or the wizarding word than for the child's personal happiness. It was all for the Greater Good, after all. And so, Little Harry got dumped on the doorstep of Number 4 Privet Drive, where he would be found the next morning when Petunia Dursley took out the milk.
-JUNE 1, 1991-
In a manor on the outskirts of London, a young boy was calmly tucking into his breakfast while reading the newspaper. As he ate, his butler came in.
"My Lord, here are your business reports."
"Hmm… Sebastian, I want another collection of toys released by the end of the month," Ciel Phantomhive remarked. "It seems that our popularity ratings have gone down recently."
"Yes, my lord," Sebastian replied calmly.
"Also, has her Majesty had any problems lately?'
"Yes, My Lord. Apparently, in the Wizarding World, there was a man called Lord Voldemort who had been killing non-magical people known as Muggles, and wizards that come from muggle families. Ten years ago, Voldemort was vanquished by a boy named Harry Potter. This boy will be attending Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and her Majesty requested that you also attend, look after to boy, and eliminate the Dark Lord and his followers if necessary," Sebastian replied, pouring his young master's tea.
"Very well, let's enroll and find out more.
~In Minerva McGonagall's Office~
Professor McGonagall was sending out letters to all the young witches and wizards who would be attending Hogwarts in the coming year when a raven carrying a letter flew in through the open window. Paying it no mind, she continued her business as usual. When lunch time came around however, she decided to liberate the now impatient bird of its letter.
-The letter-
'My name is Ciel Phantomhive, Earl to the house of Phantomhive and Watchdog to Her Majesty, the Queen of England. It has come to my attention that one Harry Potter is to attend for his first year of schooling at your establishment this year. Her Majesty wishes for the one who vanquished Lord Voldemort to be properly protected should he return or his followers try to eliminate the boy as a threat. As such, I along with my butler Sebastian Michaelis are requesting your cooperation in alleviating Her Majesty's concerns. We request entrance into your school; I shall be attending as a fellow student to Harry Potter while I believe that Sebastian would make a good professor or assistant professor. It is my responsibility to eliminate the worries of Her Majesty, and so by royal decree I will be protecting The-Boy-Who-Lived from the threat of Lord Voldemort. To clear things up, I'd like to invite you to dinner at my manor on the outskirts of London. I will send a car to pick you up at Kings Cross and take you to my home at 8 o'clock on Saturday.
I appreciate your cooperation, Earl Phantomhive
Paling, Minerva McGonagall gushed to Albus's office and shoved the note at him.
"Oh dear!" Albus Dumbledore exclaimed when shown the letter, his blue eyes no longer twinkling. "I do believe we must let him attend. Let's respond and arrange to meet.
-Eight o'clock on Saturday the 21st-
Minerva McGonagall and Albus Dumbledore were waiting in front of Kings Cross Station waiting for something, when a man in a butler outfit stepped out of a hearse and bowed to them.
"Good evening, my name is Sebastian Michaelis and I will be taking you to the Phantomhive manor. If you would come with me," He said leading them to the car. Albus and Minerva followed behind him, bemused. So this man was one of the people who would come to Hogwarts. Albus examined this man carefully. He was very tall, a little over six feet, and had black hair and crimson eyes. These crimson exes examined Albus back, making the Gandalf look alike a tad uncomfortable. These eyes narrowed slightly before turning to acknowledge the woman text to Albus. Minerva McGonagall smiled faintly, allowing Sebastian to help her onto the area not occupied by a coffin. Sitting on said coffin, Sebastian smirked and bade the driver, a man with silver hair, a top, hat, and a crazy grin, to continue diving. As they made their way out of town, Sebastian stated, "I am sure you have many questions, so please, ask away." Albus cleared his throat, smoothing his magnificent cobalt blue robes.
"Er, yes. I mean… I do have some questions." Steeling himself, desperately trying not to wilt underneath Sebastian's cold stare, the great warlock of Britain gathered whatever shred of Gryffindor courage he had, and started to interrogate the demon,
"Well, first of all, can you do magic?" he questioned. Sebastian shook his head. Dumbledore looked uncomfortable. "Then how will you be able to teach?" Sebastian just chucked.
"Trust me," the demon replied, "If I couldn't do something as simple as teaching magic, then what kind of butler would I be?" McGonagall looked uncomfortable. Leaning forward, she interjected, "No offence, but how will a muggle be able to teach properly if he or she cannot demonstrate their material." Sebastian looked thoughtful. "Well, I can always teach something that does not involve magic. For instance, I do believe you have a history class. Also, I could help with muggle studies, or even teach a class teaching muggleborns about the wizarding world." The McGonagall looked pleased. Dumbledore continued. "And what about Lord Phantomhive?" Sebastian smirked. "Just tell them the truth. Oh! We're here."
The car slowed to a roll, gravel crunching. In front of them was a magnificent manor. Foreboding and mysterious, the building was surrounded by mist and fog, giving it an eerie quality. Sebastian hopped out, giving the driver a box of dog biscuits. Then, he helped the two out, and Undertaker rode away, cackling madly. McGonagall shivered, this place was creepy. As he led the wizards up to the house, he continued. "There is no need to lie. It would just make things harder." Opening the door, he bowed and stepped back. "My Lord and Lady, I welcome you to Phantomhive manor. Please wait here. My lord will be here shortly." He walked off and headed for the kitchens, where three servants were currently duck taped to a chair (to prevent ANYTHING from happening). Humming, he began to prepare dinner, ignoring the muffled shouts from the imbeciles behind him.
-Meanwhile-
Standing in the entrance hall Albus and Minerva exchanged looks. Who is this lord? What is he like? How old is he? Before they could consider asking each other such questions, a cold voice rang out.
"Welcome. My name is Ciel Phantomhive and I am pleased to make your acquaintance." Standing at the top of the stairs was a short boy with dark hair and a perpetual frown. He wore an eye patch, but the visible eye was a shade of deep blue. He was slim and delicate looking, but the manner in which he held himself told you otherwise. All in all, this child was like a miniature version of Tom Riddle mixed with Lucius Malfoy. Beckoning for the two to follow him, Ciel let the wizards to the drawing room. After they seated, he casually motioned for Sebastian, who was now suddenly standing in the corner with a tea trolley. Bowing to everyone, he poured them all tea, while setting out a bowl of biscuits, and another one full of lemon drops. Dumbledore's face brightened at the sight of his favorite treat. As the rest of them looked on in utter disgust, he grabbed a handful and stuffed them in his mouth. Turning red, McGonagall spluttered," Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore! Take those lemon drops it out of yer gob right now! How dare ye be so disrespectful to your hosts?" Looking quite abashed, Albus spit the candies into his handkerchief, and with a flick of his wand, vanished them. Coughing politely, Sebastian interjected, "Could we all please get to business here? My lord has a tight schedule tomorrow and needs to get to bed on time?" After everyone nodded and gave murmurs of assent, Sebastian continued, "Now, if you would all please follow me to the dining room, we can talk over dinner."
-In the dining room-
As everyone, including Sebby, sat at the table, Albus interjected, "So how will a non-wizard be able to perform magic? Hogwarts is a school for witchcraft and wizardry. There is no way you can protect harry if the student population rebels against a muggle attending the school." Chuckling as he dug into his food, Ciel replied, "I may not be a wizard, but don't think for a minute that I am helpless." Exchanging looks, Dumbledore and McGonagall mentally prepared themselves for a really long night.
-IN DIAGON ALLEY-
Ciel Phantomhive was not impressed. These wizards had no manners. After arriving at the Leaky Cauldron, Ciel and Sebastian quickly made their way to a bricked up wall, which was soon turned into an arch that revealed Diagon Alley. Deciding to first get the proper currency, he climbed the steps of Gringotts. Inside the building were odd creatures that resembled short men with pointy ears and teeth. Stepping up to the nearest teller, Ciel regarded the goblin in front of them.
"Yes?" it asked peering down at him. "What do you want?"
"I would like to exchange money for the proper currency and hopefully also open up a vault," Ciel stated.
"Very well." Trotting over to another goblin, it whispered in its ear. That goblin looked over at Ciel and grinned.
Once out of Gringotts, Ciel headed for Madam Malkin's while Sebastian purchased their supplies. Inside was a proud looking blond boy.
"And you are," the blond boy drawled, barely sparing Ciel a glance. Hmm, this boy was definitely someone to look out for.
"Ciel Phantomhive," Ciel responded.
"My name is Draco Malfoy," he drawled.
"Hmm."
After leaving Madam Malkin's, Ciel headed for Ollivander's.
Half an hour later, Ciel left with a pine wand with dragon heartstring and Sebastian a dogwood and tengu feather wand. Both satisfied with their results, they left Diagon Alley to prepare for Hogwarts.
Author's Note:
Well then, my first chapter…Revised! Yay! What should I write for the next ones? I am planning to include the train ride and the sorting ceremony. What houses should I place the two in and when should they meet Harry? Please leave comments and suggestions! Oh, and, this chapter was beta'd by the wonderful CrowNoYami. You should read the potter/ kuroshitsuji fanfiction written by this author.
Preview for Chapter 2
It was the first day of school for Ciel Phantomhive. Yay for him! Ciel was not so pleased. He had to spend the next few hours on a train with some whiny brats, he was not a wizard, even if he now had a wand, and the person he needed to look out for had not arrived yet. Grumbling, Ciel paced in front of the barrier between platforms 9 and 10. And his day had started out so well- nothing was blown up, Grell didn't make his, I mean HER, weekly visit, and the manor hadn't been destroyed yet. He could only hope that would last the nine-ish months he would be gone.
'Why am I doing this again,' he asked himself. 'Oh, yeah, because her royal majesty Queen Elizabeth II has ordered me to do so. Why is it that after about a hundred years that I don't get to retire? Because I am an immortal F-ing demon who gets no days off!' Ciel's mental rant continued on for about half an hour before he was snapped from his thoughts by a small boy tapping his shoulder.
"Excuse me sir," the boy mumbled nervously. "Could you tell me where platform nine-and-three-quarters is?" Ciel and Sebastian just stared. The boy in front of them was small and scrawny, with toothpick legs and knobbly knees. In fact, he was more than scrawny. He looked starved, almost like he didn't get enough to eat ever. But weight aside, this child had the most remarkable appearance. He had jet black, gravity defying hair that stuck up a lot in the back. Also he was very pale, extremely so. He was almost pasty looking. He also had a pair of brilliant Avada Kedavra green eyes. But the most remarkable part of this boy was the scar. The boy in front of them had a lightning bolt shaped scar in the middle of his forehead. THIS was the legendary savior of the wizarding world?