May 1997
He really started to notice when he was eighteen. The lingering looks, the slide of eyes slowly moving up and down his body. The,"oops mmm sorry" when he would rub up against him or let his hand stay a little long on his shoulder or arm. At first, he thought he was just imaging things. He thought, somehow he had perverted something innocent as a look or touch into… what... something sexual? Nah, he was crazy. There is no way, right? He would just have to pay closer attention. Maybe, just maybe, he was missing something. After all, he has been taking CARE of Sammy since he was four years old. He was kind of the closest thing he'd known as a parent. God knows, it wasn't dad himself. He thinks out loud," I am the one who changed the diapers. I'm the one who gave him a wet washcloth when he had a fever. I'm the one who rubbed his belly when it hurt, and sang him to sleep after a nightmare. I'm the one that holds him still to this day, when he's sad or hurting, soothing him. Yeah, I'm crazy, not to mention sick as fuck." How could he even think anything like that about his baby boy? He rubs his hands over his face and talks to a God he really doesn't believe in…"Um, God if your there? Please take away these thoughts. I don't know what is happening to me. I love my brother more than anything in this world. I would never, ever dream of hurting him. I don't want to even think my brother is noticing me like that." He prays.
So he knows he has a few weeks before school is out. Maybe he can figure this thing out before Sam is in summer break. (And before Dad is back from the hunt) He looks around, from where he's sitting at the table in the kitchenette, at the clock on the night stand. It's four o'clock. Sam will be home from school any minute. As if on cue, he hears the rustling of the door lock. Sam stumbles through the door, shrugs his backpack off and toes out of his shoes. Dean watches and senses something is not quite right. Sam breezes past Dean with no much as a "hi". His head is down, hair covering his face and he heads straight for the bathroom. Dean turns in his chair so he can watch his baby brother enter the small bathroom. He rises from his chair and walks towards the bathroom door. Knocking softly "Um Sam everything alright?" Dean reaches for the knob when he doesn't hear a response that is quick enough for him. His hand touches the handle and he stills as he hears his brother's voice.
Clearing his throat, Sam says "uhmmm yeah everything's fine. Just some assholes messing with me is all." At that, Dean doesn't even hesitate to continue turning the handle and pushing it open. Sam is in front of the mirror, head tilted back, with toilet tissue in both his nostrils. Dean does a once over from head to toe. He sees a black eye forming and a reddened cheek. But, the worst of the injuries are to Sam's right hand. His knuckles are tore to shit.
Stepping forward, Dean grabs a washcloth and runs it under the tap. There is no hot water in this piece of shit motel, so he doesn't bother warming the water up first. "Sit. Let me take a look at that face."
"Dean, I'm fine." Sam grumbles
"Uh, I'd have to disagree there sunshine. Fine doesn't have toilet paper hangin out his nose. Now SIT." Dean says in his authoritative-don't give me shit boy-voice.
Sam doesn't bother to argue. He closes the lid and leers up at his older brother.
Dean tips Sam's' head up with a fingertip and leads his brother's head left to right. Inspecting his swollen cheek and now he sees a busted lip. "You gonna tell me what happened?" Dean exhales. He lifts Sammy's hair out of his eyes to inspect his forehead. That seems to be unmarked. He starts to gently dab the corner of Sam's eye running the washcloth slowly over his bruising cheek too. He squats down to get a better angle of his brother's busted lip. He notices that Sam has not responded to his question and looks his brother in the eyes. "You gonna tell me what happened?" He asks once more.
Sam is staring at Dean. He feels his heart start to race when the washcloth first touches his skin. He is looking at those intense eyes scanning over his face. He lets his eyes move down to those God forsaken pink luscious lips. He sees them moving, but he hears only his own heartbeat. He feels his dick twitch, coming to life. When he makes it back up his face looking in those eyes, he does hear his brothers' voice.
"They called me a freak. I just kind of went ballistic on their ass." Sam says squarely meeting his brother's gaze.
"Their asses? How many were there?" Dean says just inches away from Sam's face. He can feel Sam's hot breath as he exhales slowly.
"Just one at first, then his buddies joined. So three, no, four in all." Sam's breath hitches and his eyes can't help but to move down to those lips again.
Dean notices and gets up and walks to the sink, running the cloth under some running water and wringing it out. He peers at Sam and lets his eyes move to his brother's crotch. He hates himself for even looking. But, yeah, he definitely sees something stirring under those jeans. "Well, I'll let you finish up here and I'll go get some dinner. I'll be back in a few." He leaves the room and walks over to the dresser. He looks into the mirror and sighs. Before grabbing the motel key, he adjusts his hardening cock.
As he walks to the diner a few blocks away, he thinks. "What the fuck was that? He looks down at his dick. You can't do that you hear! "Talking towards his dick (like it is a separate entity) He is your baby brother. Don't even go there. "
He growls out the order to the poor girl behind the counter. He tosses the money on the counter and grabs the sacks of food. He knows the girl didn't do anything wrong, he is just pissed at himself for getting a hard-on while his baby brother was running through his mind.
When he gets back to the motel Sam is sitting at the table doing homework. He doesn't look up when Dean enters the room. Nor, does he look up when he rattles around in the kitchen, pulling paper plates out and filling two glasses with water. As a matter of fact, he doesn't look up until his food is pushed into his view.
Sam looks at his plate and stares, slowly looking up at his brother. With a smile that could kill, especially with those fucking dimples, he says "You got me a salad?"
"Yeah, what of it?" Dean snorts. "I just didn't want to hear you bitch about me not ever getting you healthy stuff."
"Okay." Sam grins as he pushes the fork into his lettuce.
The next few weeks were pretty much uneventful. Sammy went to school, came home and did his homework. Dean (having already quit and got his GED) stayed home and helped out at a garage in town once maybe twice a week. He would bring dinner home after work, always remembering to bring green veggies instead of his standard fries. This always brought a smile and unspoken I love you from Sammy's lips. Dean could tell this in how his baby brother would grin every time he stabbed a fork into a leafy green. Although the weeks went without incident, Dean always took notice when Sammy would give him that hooded look, or squeeze his shoulder a little longer then a brother should. Dean tried to ignore it, but what couldn't be ignored was the hardness throbbing between his legs, relieved only by shutting his eyes tightly and thinking of his Sammy when he held it in his hand.
July 4 1997
They had since moved along from that small town, into another, somewhere in Middle America. Bobby has come to pick up John for a hunting trip. As the two older hunters leave the small motel room Bobby says "Well, I figured it'd just be easier to come get you rather than wait for that idjit Rufus to get here. He's up in Montana. I think it's a Wendago. Any who, we'll be back in four days, tops." Bobby looks back at Sam and Dean before closing the door behind them. John says nothing as he leaves. Assuming the boys know the drill by now. Neither men acknowledging that it's a holiday.
After Dean hears the shoty engine back fire and rumble down the road, from whatever piece of crap Bobby is driving, he hops up and declares "Well Sammy, I got some runnin around to do in town. You want me to drop you off at the library? Or do you want to stay here? Sam shrugs and replies "The library I guess." They gather up their duffels and head to the Impala.
Dean doesn't arrive at the library until seven p.m. He sees his brother sitting on the steps leading to the building. He pulls up in front and honks. Sam looks up from the book he has his nose buried in and smiles at his brother. Doesn't matter that he has waited all day for him to come back, he is just happy to see him.
This makes Dean grin from ear to ear. He has a real treat for his baby boy.
Sam jogs down the steps, slinging his duffel over his shoulder. He opens the Impala's back door and tosses the bag into the back, before sliding unto the bench seat up front.
"Why are you on the steps and not inside where it's cool? Dean questions. "Um, well libraries are closed on the fourth Dean." Sam says with a grin. "Oh shit Sammy! I'm sorry dude! I didn't even think about it." Dean feels like shit now, having his brother wait on him all day.
"s' kay Dean. I had a book in my bag. I was alright." Sam almost whispers.
"Well, you will be. I got a surprise for you." Dean says as he pulls the car unto the road. Dean pulls into a diner and parks. "But, let's go get some grub first."
They drive for almost an hour to the outskirts of town. Dean drives the car unto a dirt road and into a field. He leaves the headlights on and gets out of his side. Sam follows suit and the meet at the hood of the car. Dean is grinning from ear to ear. There is a plethora of fireworks set up in the clearing, the headlights showing a spotlight on the small mountain of fun. The look on his brother's face and the warm embrace is well worth the day of hustling pool it took him to get enough money for the firecrackers. He is so proud that he can make Sam smile like that.
They make their way back to the Impala and sit on the hood. Before getting settled Dean hops up and pops the trunk. Retrieving two beers from the ice chest and walks back to the hood. He makes his way back beside Sam and hands him a beer. "I think you're man enough now." Sam's eyes bug out a little and his face breaks out in one of those "rip your heart out" smiles. He takes the bottle and the boys turn the top at the same time and throw the cap over their shoulder. Sam raises his bottle only halfway to his mouth before Dean stops him by grabbing his wrist. Sam looks sad almost that his brother has changed his mind. Dean surprises him again tonight when he says
"We have to toast first." Dean's look a little too serious.
Sam's brows wrinkle up in the middle, like he's doing a hard math problem. "You mean like give a speech?"
Dean chuckles "no, like real men do" and teaches his brother to clink their bottles together before the first sip is taken.
Dean is enjoying this moment of quite, smiling inwardly at making his Sammy happy. He looks over at Sam to watch. He is surprised that Sam is quite frankly STARING at him. He lets the gaze hold for what feels like forever. Seeing that determined look in Sammy's eyes, the one that says he has made his mind up. Dean knows all too well that if Sam makes his mind up there is no turning back. And he thinks "Fuck, this is it. He is going to tell me how he feels." The bottom of his stomach seems to rise to his throat. He blinks and prepares to hear the words that he knows have been coming. He doesn't know yet what his response is going to be. He knows what it should be. He should tell his brother no. They can't go there. They are brothers, even if they both feel like more.
He doesn't get the chance to respond anything though. When he opens his eyes, Sammy is off the hood and at his feet. He pulls his big brother by the ankles until his feet touch the ground. Their bodies are touching at the thighs and hips. They are that close.[Years in the future, Sam will pull his brother's ankles of the Impala just as he does today. However, the outcome will be quite different. As Sam may look like Sam,but is actually just a meat suit for Lucifer.] Dean feels his brother's straining cock through soft denim, his own cock jumping to life almost instantly at the unexpected action. Sam takes his brother's shirt and fists it, pulling Dean up. Their faces are inches apart. Their green eyes staring into the others, Time stands still as hot breath is shared between the two. Sam makes up the difference and brushes his lips to Dean's. Eyes still open, still staring, willing the other not to stop. Lips brush softly. Sam licks at his brothers' lips pushing his way in. Dean opens up to let his baby explore the wet warmth that is his mouth. Dean's tongue finally comes to life and thrust into Sam's and his hands wrap around the soft chestnut hair. He pulls gently back tilting his head for better access. He deepens the kiss. Sam's hands release the shirt he's been holding and flattens his palms on Dean's chest. He lets them glide down and slip under the hem. His hands are warm and calloused running along the hard plain of abdomen and chest.
Dean's left hand stays gripping to soft curls. His other is in the small of Sam's back, pulling his brother in closer. Sam arches his back, grinding his pelvis into Dean's thigh. He whimpers at the friction. Dean reaches around and unbuttons Sammy's jeans and slides his hand into his boxers. They open their eyes at the same time. Sam whimpers again and Dean takes that as an okay to continue. Sammy has other ideas though. He reaches down and tugs at Dean's button and zipper. He reaches around and pushes his hands down the back of Dean's jeans pulling them and his boxer briefs down. This elicits a whimper from Dean. His erection slaps up to his stomach. Sammy gives that determined look again and pulls his dick out of reach and falls to his knees.
He looks up at his brother while he grabs the base and licks a flat tongue around the head, licking and softly sucking at the slit that is leaking a perpetual stream of precome. He opens wide and takes the length of his brother in one swallow till he feels his lips on his own hand. Dean exhales a "oh fuck Sammy" with the first lick of that tongue on him. When Sammy takes him whole, he no longer can form words. Just sounds of "ahhhhh, ohhhh!" and in a much higher tone then is normal.
When Sammy hollows his cheeks and gets a steady rhythm going he removes his hold on his brother and places his hands on his hip bones instead. Humming a "mmmmmm" and sucking even harder when he feels his brother start to buck into his mouth erratically. Dean pats Sammy's head with the tell-tale sign of "I'm not gonna last much longer, if you don't want to swallow what I have to give, nows your chance." Sam grips his fingers into flesh and somehow goes deeper. Dean can feel the back of his throat on his head, and this is his undoing. He screams out nothing that resembles the English language and spills his hot liquid down his younger brother's throat. Sam is greedy with every drop. He doesn't stop sucking until Dean pulls him off. "Sammy too sensitive, you gotta stop now."
Dean pulls him up by gripping his underarms. He cups his brother's face in his hands and pulls him into a soft and sweet kiss. When they pull apart Dean tells his brother "You wanta get in the back seat and I'll uh you know, return the pleasure?" Sam grins and huffs out "Dean I'm fourteen. I didn't last past your moans." At that, Dean leans in for another kiss. When they separate Sammy looks down and sees he's made a mess of his jeans. Dean is putting himself back his jeans. Sammy's not really sure what to do. His clothes are back at the motel. Dean notices his brother's predicament and holds up a finger to wait there. When he returns he has an old rag used to check oil. He bends to his knees and cleans Sammy's come littered jeans. "There now you're all clean"
Sammy laughs at the statement, remembering that is what he used to say when he would wash his face and hands after a lunch with PB and J. He then puts himself back together and walks around to the passenger side, while Dean is at the driver side. They stop and look at each other over the hood, both of them smirking at the other. Dean finally speaks "Sammy, I think is going to be the best summer we've ever had." Both open and sliding into to their seats and shutting the doors simultaneously.