Paths Not Taken (Wanda's Story)
No victory without sacrifice; no love without loss.
[Author's Note: This story is a sequel to The Agent Coulson Files, especially the final story of that collection, Forget.]
Wanda awoke with a start. She was shaking, and covered in sweat. It was not the first time it had happened, but the experience had not become any easier with repetition.
She staggered to the shower, stripping off her sodden clothes and letting the hot water play over her skin. Maybe it will wash away whatever is hiding under there, she thought.
She felt that the dreams that interrupted her sleep on a near-nightly basis were, in fact, the same dream. The problem was that she could never remember it.
Could it have anything to do with what Pietro had said a few weeks ago? Her brother was not, she reflected, a reliable source for anything, known to play tricks for no reason other than mischief. Nevertheless, he had seemed genuinely surprised by her response. Neither threats nor cajoling could get him to say anything more. She had not seen him since.
Her shower over, she went into the living room. Her cello was there; she picked it up, not to play it but simply because holding it gave her a sense of comfort. She made a mental note that she would need to re-string it soon. No, she realised, looking at it. The strings were nearly new.
That's funny, she thought. I don't remember doing that. But it must have been within the past month, judging from their condition. How could she have forgotten it?
There was a little scratch in one part of her brain. Vaguely, she could remember starting the task. But she had been interrupted. By what? Still holding the cello, she closed her eyes to concentrate.
An image of an unfamiliar woman floated up to her. She was standing … where? Could it be … at the door of Wanda's house?
Wanda concentrated, trying to recall the details of the scene. Yes, the woman had short, dark hair and a husky voice.
"Hello," she said. "My name is Maria Hill. I am the Deputy Director of SHIELD."
And then she had offered her hand. Wanda had touched it …
And the world had gone dark.
"Maria Hill," said Wanda aloud. "Deputy Director of SHIELD."
Maria Hill was glad to be away from the heli-carrier. It had been a gruelling period, overseeing various aspects of the reconstruction of New York as well as the repairs to the heli-carrier. And, of course, there was the ongoing work of SHIELD, as well as the various special projects for which she was responsible.
So, at Fury's insistence, she was taking a few days 'off' – working in a senior position in SHIELD meant you were never really absent from the job – and had checked into a comfortable, anonymous hotel in Boston.
She opened the door and immediately sensed the presence of another person in the room. In a moment, her gun was in her hand.
"Please don't do that," said a female voice.
"Alright," said Hill. At once, she wondered why she had said it.
"You can put the gun down and turn on the lights," said the voice. "I'm just here to talk. Don't worry. Why don't you make yourself a drink and sit down."
Hill did as the voice had suggested, puzzled as to why she felt so calm.
Then she realised who was sitting in the facing chair.
"So what should we talk about?" said Wanda.
"Maybe we should start with why you are in my hotel room," said Hill.
"Good idea," said Wanda. "I would like to find out why I remember you coming to my door. And why I don't remember anything about what happened after that, until I was playing my cello. And there are plenty of other gaps, as well. No memories, but plenty of bad dreams. Ms Hill, please don't try and tell me that you don't know what I'm talking about."
"I am Deputy Director of SHIELD," said Hill. "Much of what I do is, by definition, very highly classified."
Wanda looked at Hill for a long time. Hill felt a buzzing noise in her head, like a small vibration at the base of her brain.
After a while, Wanda said: "Why, Deputy Director, do you feel guilty about seeing me?"
"I have done many things," said Hill, "not because I wanted to do them but because they needed to be done. If you want me to spill SHIELD's secrets, you might have more success with a rubber hose than with some mind-reading tricks."
"I am not interested in SHIELD," said Wanda. "I only want to know what happened to me and how you connect to it. If you were completely at ease with your feelings, I would not be able to sense anything. But part of you wants to tell me. So why don't you?"
Hill sipped her drink. She studied Wanda carefully. It was true that she had not been able to reconcile her feelings about her role in the suppression of Wanda's memories. Her brain told her that it had been the right thing to do. Important. Necessary. A matter of public safety.
But her heart said that taking away someone's most precious feelings – their memory of loving and being loved – was quite simply an awful thing. When, she thought, did we start doing the things that the bad guys do?
She took something out of her pocket. She had been carrying it with her since she had retrieved it from Agent Coulson's locker, and often found herself looking at it in quiet moments.
She got up and made herself another drink – a strong one. She walked over to Wanda, who stood to face her.
Hill showed Wanda the photograph. "Do you remember this occasion?" said Hill. "Do you remember this person?"
Wanda took the photograph and stared at it.
It began slowly. A cello recital. You play very well. My name is Coulson. Would you like … yes I would. A restaurant. An art gallery. A walk by the river.
And then faster. Not dogs. The museum. Amulet. Enchantress. Phillip. Time for you to kiss me. Mather. Vortex. A summer's day.
And then a flood. Flowers. Not at all. That was absolutely wonderful. Absolutely. Wonderful. I love you. I loveyou. Iloveyou. HelloIamMariaHill. Darkness.
Wanda staggered under the mental impact. Hill caught her to stop her from falling. "I'm sorry," Hill whispered. "I'm so sorry."
"But why?" said Wanda. "Why? And where is Phillip?"
Hill was silent.
Wanda clasped Hill's head in her hands. "Where?" she shouted.
Hill felt her head start to throb. The throbbing increased. It felt as if her mind was going to explode. "Phillip … " she heard herself say. "The battle with Loki … Phillip … the heli-carrier … he's gone … "
"NO!" screamed Wanda.
Hill could feel the room begin to fill with energy, dark and pulsating, expanding, howling and burning with a fire of the soul. Desperately, she threw her arms around Wanda.
"Don't!" she shouted over the growing vortex.
"I WILL NOT LOSE HIM!" shouted Wanda. "I WILL HAVE HIM WITH ME AGAIN!"
Hill could feel her flesh begin to burn. But there was another feeling as well: the sense that the world had stopped turning for a moment – and then begun again. And then Maria Hill knew no more.
"I don't really know what this does," said Agent Coulson to Loki, as he hefted the gun, "Perhaps we should find out."
Loki merely smiled. And then suddenly Loki – the real Loki, not an illusion – was standing behind Agent Coulson. He raised his lance, and thrust it forward.
But his target had suddenly vanished. The gun fell to the floor with a clatter.
"Odd," said Loki.
PART II
It was a long, passionate kiss. Finally, they parted. They smiled into each other's eyes.
Wanda, leaning back, examined the ring on her finger. "Never really saw the point of these things," she said. "Until now."
The two of them were in the kitchen of Wanda's house in Portland. They had just finished a pleasant meal.
"There's another one that you get later," said Coulson. "Plain but precious. The idea of the ring is meant to symbolise something that never ends. An always thing."
"And is the always thing likely to include children at some point?" she said.
"I certainly hope so," said Coulson.
"Me too," said Wanda.
Then they heard it: an odd whispering sound. On the far wall of the room, a silvery crack began to form.
Coulson ran to the rack where he had hung his holster. He drew the gun.
In a few moments, the crack had grown to the size of a doorway.
The Enchantress stepped out. The portal closed behind her.
"You again," said Coulson.
"Skanky one," said Wanda. "How's the nose?"
"I'll let that pass," said the Enchantress. "You will be pleased to know that I have come to save your wretched little planet."
"Uh-huh," said Wanda.
"Save us from what?" said Coulson. "Why should we believe anything you say? Your credibility record is not good."
"It is not me you have to believe," said the Enchantress. "Have you watched that stupid little box you people have – television, I think you call it – lately?"
"Uh, as a matter of fact, no," said Coulson. "I have some time off, and we've just been doing things together and letting the rest of the world go on its way."
Wanda was silent. Keeping to themselves had been a 'suggestion' she had made.
Eventually, she said to the Enchantress: "You know, I could break your nose again, if you want. Or I could do … other things."
"I know what you can do," said the Enchantress. "It's because of the things that you can do that your people are in this mess. But why don't you just turn on your little box."
"Maybe we should," said Coulson. He turned the set on.
It was a news program. There was a female reporter speaking to a camera. The skyline of New York City, smoking and broken, was in the background, across the river.
" … after three days, the Battle of New York is now clearly over," she said. "And it is undeniable that the human forces have been defeated. The US military, with assistance from a range of overseas forces, have fought with courage and ingenuity but the Chitauri soldiers, under the leadership of the mysterious but extremely powerful figure Loki, have proved too strong. And more of them continue to arrive through the ever-growing rift above the city.
"In the latest reports, it appears that the SHIELD heli-carrier, which was acting as the co-ordinator of the defence, has been destroyed, apparently after an assault by several Leviathans, as the huge armoured creatures from the Chitauri dimension are generally known."
Another scene appeared, from the day before according to the date on the screen. It looked like a massive thunderstorm in a blue sky, with Leviathans and Chitauri soldiers on flying platforms swirling around a central figure.
The voice of the reporter said: "In this airborne battle yesterday, several of the Leviathans and a large number of Chitauri soldiers were destroyed. The individual involved appeared to have some sort of lightning weapon, but little is known of him. It appears that he eventually fell to the sheer weight of numbers."
The thunderstorm on the screen grew larger and more savage, drawing more of the huge creatures into the fray. Then there was a massive whirl of lightning, and suddenly the sky held nothing but Leviathans and Chitauri. And Loki, riding one of the Chitauri craft. The long-range camera zoomed in on him. He was laughing.
The Enchantress gave a cry: "No! By the gods, no!"
"Last time I met you," said Wanda, "you were trying to kill him yourself."
"That's different," said the Enchantress.
The reporter appeared again. "There are stories of a force of American soldiers, police, and civilians continuing to fight in the Battery," she said. "Their leader appears to be a man wearing a blue uniform and using a shield with a star, who some commentators believe to be Captain America, although he was last seen nearly seventy years ago. He has proved to be an inspirational and extremely capable figure, but there are serious doubts as to how long he and his forces can hold out. The Chitauri forces are simply too numerous, and their weapons are too powerful."
The reporter was handed a sheet of paper. "It appears," she said, as she read it, "that Iron Man, after a valiant single-handed attack on the Chitauri command centre – the Stark Tower – has been killed. While accounts are sketchy at best, it seems that he was killed in a confrontation with Loki.
"There have already been sightings of Chitauri scouts as far away as Canada, Mexico and Chicago," said the reporter. "It is now clear that this is an attack on the entire planet, and on humanity itself. All efforts to close the rift, including a last-ditch attempt to launch nuclear missiles at New York City, have been unsuccessful, with all missiles being intercepted and destroyed. While the forces defending the city fought bravely, there is only one thing left to say: God help us all."
Coulson turned the television off.
"Strange device," said the Enchantress.
"Why didn't they fight together?" Coulson said to the Enchantress. "That had always been the idea of the Avengers Initiative. Iron Man, Captain America, Thor, the others. Together, they would have been stronger. Perhaps unbeatable."
"Because they had no reason to," said the Enchantress. "There was no symbol to draw them together. In another river of time, the one that should have been, that is what happened. I have seen it." She looked at Wanda. "It was your action that changed the flow of the river," she said. "If you had not done that, the Avengers would have been formed and Loki would have been stopped. And your planet would have been saved. Because, believe me, there will not be much left when the Chitauri get through with it."
"I don't understand," said Coulson. "Wanda, what is she saying, about you changing the course of events?"
"She wanted you with her," said the Enchantress. "So she pulled you out of the river."
"I wanted," said Wanda to Coulson, "to save you. In part for myself, yes, but also because I did not want the man I love to die."
"But now," he said softly, "the whole planet will die."
"I didn't mean for this to happen!" cried Wanda. "I just wanted you back! I wanted to be loved! And I wanted to love you!"
Coulson took her gently in his arms. "I know," he said. "But I have to go back. Events have to play out as they were supposed to."
Wanda stepped back from him. Tears were streaming down her face. "I don't know how to do that," she said. "It's not something I can control."
"I can do it," said the Enchantress.
Wanda felt her hand begin to burn. The Enchantress, sensing the energy that was starting to build, took a step back, wondering who was the more powerful. She did not want to find out.
Coulson took Wanda's hand. He put it to his lips and kissed it. Wanda felt the turbulence within her subside. "This has to be done," he said to her. "And in your heart, you know that."
Wanda was silent for a long time. "Yes," she said at last. "I do."
Coulson turned to the Enchantress. "I will go with you," he said. "But tell me one thing: why are you doing this? You have no interest in the fate of Earth. Just the opposite."
"Because," said the Enchantress, "I have a bone to pick with Loki. Quite a few, in fact. Because I don't want to see him and his allies grow any more powerful. And because no-one kills Thor but me."
Coulson nodded. "What do I have to do?" he said to the Enchantress.
The Enchantress drew a stone from her belt. "Put your hand on this," she said, holding it in her palm. He did so.
He looked at Wanda. A last look, a last smile. "Always," he said.
And then they were gone.
Loki's spear rammed into Coulson's back. He fell.
The Enchantress, watching from the shadows, could not hear all of Coulson's words to Loki. Only: "You will lose. It is in your nature. Because you lack conviction."
He pulled the trigger. Loki was blasted through the bulkhead.
A few moments later, a big black man came running up. He knelt next to Coulson.
"It's okay," said Coulson, as his life bled away. "It was never going to work … unless they had something … " There was no more.
The Enchantress thought that she could hear the wheels of the world turning.
CODA
Wanda was at the top of a grassy hill playing her cello. It was a piece she had composed herself: sweet and sad, telling of things lost and things remembered. But the final movement was peaceful, gentle, like a sun rising through early morning mist.
She looked up at the clear blue sky.
"Always," she said.
END