Young & Beautiful, an austin & ally fanfic

I'm going to warn you now that the writing style is very odd. And I don't know how many people will like it, but here it is.

The last time I ever stepped off a tour bus was bittersweet. No more albums, no more concerts, no more screaming fans. More personal life, more free time, more chances to do what I want to do. I am only twenty-two and I've made more money than a lot of people will make in a lifetime, which is horrifying. My reason for giving it all up was her. The girl who saved me from myself, my own demons. Before her I was a monster inside my own body. The meth. The heroin. The alcohol. All of it was taking its toll on my mind and my appearance. And then she appeared.

I was barely twenty, but had been in the business for five years. She had given up on me three years before when the only problem I had was passing high school. "I need to focus on school, and not on a budding music career that may or may not live much longer." Then she was gone. We didn't speak at all during our senior year. Not at prom. Not at graduation. Not at homecoming. Never. Three days after graduation I took my first sip of alcohol. By the end of the following month, I was hooked. I had my people buy it in the gallons. The next month I took up heroin. It wasn't my favorite, but it did its job. My mind left the girl. By the end of the summer, meth was added. And it did more than enough to keep her out of my mind.

I moved to Bel Air in September. She started school. And all hope I had of us meeting again was gone. I got to do it all. Tour and travel. Business and pleasure. Have my cake and eat it too. I was given things I didn't need nor earned. Diamond chains, designer clothes, countless music awards. The summer approached and I was nineteen and need things to do. Things being women. Countless women. I had money and they came flocking hoping for their fifteen minutes of fame which they ended up with. Mid-July and the hot summer nights made it even easier for me. She on the other hand spent her days uncovering ancient tombs. Her dream coming true. My dream coming true. I played the girls like children. Leading them on. Giving them ideas that would never come true.

I've seen the world, done it all, had my cake now
Diamonds, brilliant, and Bel-Air now
Hot summer nights, mid-July
When you and I were forever wild
The crazy days, the city lights
The way you'd play with me like a child

"I want to get married in a big, white church in mid-June. I want red roses lining the aisle, and red table clothes in the reception area." She had smiled as they drove around. Her head on his shoulder, and their fingers entwined. Her diamond glitter on her ring finger. The only promise he could make at such a young age. "And I want you at the end of the aisle. Promising to love me forever. Promising to love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful. When it's just my aching soul. Because I know you will." Then placing a kiss on his cheek before leaving the car.

Sixteen and naïve. Sixteen and in love. Sixteen and perfect. The way he had always planned. The way they had always planned.

I thought touring was the most important thing. Watching the people cry. Hearing the people cry. Feeling the heat as the fire blazed. Lighting up the sky like an angel. The angel I thought I was. The fire adding to the heat of the summer.

The camera lights blazing, blinding me with their effects. Who was I to get all this power? A nineteen year old that had barely passed high school that was addicted to alcohol, heroin, and meth. That's who. The boy whose problems were because the girl of his dreams didn't want him. All of their plans thrown into the fire because he messed up. Because he did the one thing he promised he would never do. He had caused this. It was his fault she was gone. It was his fault that he had as many problems that he did. He could live with himself because he knew the music would pull him through it all. But then she showed up once more.

I've seen the world, lit it up as my stage now
Channeling angels in the new age now
Hot summer days, rock and roll
The way you'd play for me at your show
And all the ways I got to know
Your pretty face, electric soul

"I love the name Ariana." She commented to him as they headed home, hours after her best friend announced she was pregnant. "I like the idea of being pregnant." She had mentioned in passing the week before.

"I like the idea too. But not now." Not at seventeen. Not so young. Not when so many things could happen.

"I just like the idea of the two of us loving something that won't always be young and beautiful. They will age. We will age. We will still be together. You, me, and the baby. Young at heart."

The accident happened when he was twenty. The drugs and alcohol became too much. He floated from his body and saw himself on the bed. He saw someone else next to his bed. The girl had come back to him. Her hair still perfect. Her face still young. Her soul still beautiful. Her face was streaked with tears. Her hands held her face. She was alone with him. Everyone else had given up on him. What could she do? What could he do? The next second she began to pray. "Please bring him back, Lord. If you take him, Lord, let me meet him when the time comes. Lord, take me instead." Then he felt his eyes open and his mouth formed one word. And he spoke the one name that had caused him all this pain and suffering. But he felt like it was a saving grace.

"Ally."

Dear Lord, when I get to Heaven
Please let me bring my man
When he comes, tell me that you'll let him in
Father, tell me if you can.

Oh, that grace, oh, that body
Oh, that face makes me wanna party
He's my sun, he makes me shine like diamonds

It's still hard to believe that he was just me. A younger me who felt like his problems were from the one thing - one person - that bring me joy now. Ally. She saved me in so many ways. She made me see my own demons and helped me clean up my act. She brings me the biggest joy. She was the person who helped me figure out that I needed to leave the business. She's the person that made me know that I could be truly happy once more if I allowed myself to be. She's the one who will be my wife one day. Not today or tomorrow but someday. She is my sun.

And I love her when she feels like she is not young or beautiful. When she's angry and sad. And she loves me back.

Will you still love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful?
Will you still love me when I got nothing but my aching soul?
I know you will, I know you will
I know that you will
Will you still love me when I'm no longer beautiful?
Will you still love me when I'm no longer beautiful?
Will you still love me when I'm not young and beautiful?

So how do you feel about this? I kind of like it. I should explain that the times when "he" is used, it is used as Austin's past life before Ally came back into his life. And when he uses "I" or "me" it is after she is in her life.

Also I've been listening to "Young and Beautiful" by Lana Del Ray for a week nonstop.

Anyways, . comment what you think