AN- What happens at Jacks once Hammond leaves in Lost City. Poss follow up to "Bottom of the Abyss". Have tweaked it a bit but that's poetic license for you!
Reviews make my day! Espec as I have an anatomy exam and others coming up! Written during a bout of insomnia so be kind!
Keep Smiling!
The general had explained to them the situation and knew enough about their team dynamics to leave them, albeit shell-shocked, to deal with it in their own ways.
Daniel had sobered up surprisingly quickly after the news that the SGC was being handed over to someone who knew nothing of the stargate and its many dangers. Also at the thought that Jacks predicament may now never be sorted. They all sat in silence, knowing that the first one to break it would be facing the truth that things could never be the way they were.
"I believe that myself and DanielJackson should take our leave." Without protest Daniel follows Teal'c to the door. They watched as Sam did not even raise her head to acknowledge their departure. Her face a picture of despair and determination all at once. They both offered comforting words to Jack, and left. As the door shut Jack returned to his seat, still in awe of the events of the afternoon.
"So, looks like I'm gonna be ancient for a while, at least I'll get at least half of what Danny's on about!" his jovial tone got no response from his 2IC except for a small snort of disillusion. "Earth to Carter!"
"I heard you." She played with the beer bottle in her hand, debating whether to put it down and leave or throw it against the wall in frustration of his reaction and the situation in general. Her voice seemed small as she spoke, not sounding at all like her. Finally she put the bottle onto the table with an audible bang. "I should go." As she got up Jack blocked her path. She just stood there staring at her shoes before forcing herself to look at him.
"You can't leave; you've had too much to drink to drive Major." He couldn't explain the use of her rank, just that it would at least zone her back into listening to him.
"What do you want me to do then sir?" her tone was sharp but he didn't move.
"Just, I don't know, sit and chat for a while." She was right; neither of them knew what to do. Should he just take her in his arms and blurt out what he thought she came to tell him, to tell her things were going to be ok even when he knew they weren't going to be. He knew she wouldn't buy that for a minute.
She eventually backed down and returned to her original position on the sofa. He smiled triumphantly at her, to which he received a small smile of amusement, not quite what he was going for but it would have to do for now.
"That's better, now, drink? I can wash a cup for some coffee if you're desperate to get out of here or I think I have some fruit juice of some description."
"beer." She paused and a sad smile crossed her face. "Definitely think I need a beer." As he went off to get the drinks she sat in a trance trying to decide what she should do. Should she tell him what she came here to tell him? Just formulate plans of getting him back to being himself? Idle chit-chat until the tension built up to the stage where she had to take a taxi home? As he came back into the room and plopped next to her on the sofa she knew which option she had to take. It was going to be now or never, she couldn't help thinking that if there was no solution to the handing over of the SGC with regard to Jack that she wouldn't have much time or opportunity to tell him while he was still, well, him.
She crossed a leg under her and he leant back into the cushions trying to get comfortable. He looked up to find her facing him, staring at her hands as if they were a new fascinating doohicky. She had something to say, he could tell by the creases forming on her brow. The suspense was killing him.
Suddenly she snapped out of her trance and took a gulp from the beer bottle. "Sir, I came here to tell you something, and, well, in light of theses new developments I'm just gonna say it." He sat bolt upright at that, trying to look her in the eye as she avoided his gaze. She bit at her lower lip with nervousness.
"Damn Carter, your making me nervous!" his tone softened, "what is it?"
"before I tell you I just want you to know that if we all make it through this I fully expect repercussions sir." He noticed how her eyes took on their determined gleam. His head reeled with possibilities and hopes of what she was about to say. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes, willing herself to just come out and say it.
"You know when we were being tested as Zatarc's, well what the machine didn't pick up on was that I was lying, well not lying, just not telling the whole truth. You see…" he cut her off mid-sentence.
"Carter you're waffling and majorly confusing me, which I know isn't difficult but..." he left the sentence open and was rewarded with a smile, brighter than before.
"Ok, get to the point, I get it. Well, I said that I cared about you, a lot." her voice faltered wondering if this was a wise course of action. But she knew she couldn't just leave it in the room any more, it was out and hanging over them like a storm cloud. Another deep breath and she looked him square in the eyes. "I wanted you to leave me there because, I couldn't bear to see the man I love die because of me."
There it was said, it was out there and the storm cloud had burst. She looked away from him as his brow creased processing what she had said. The thought crossed her mind that maybe he was just thinking of a way to knock her back gently.
"So, to summarise, you love me?" his voice was tinged with disbelief and shock. Sam felt her face heat up and knew she was blushing fiercely. When she didn't answer he touched her hand, just a brush but the contact was electric and made her jump.
"Yes." Her voice, almost inaudible reached his ears. His heart sang with happiness and disbelief. "I should go; I'll get a taxi home sir. I'm sorry, it was totally inappropriate for me to have said anything." She hurriedly gathered her things and made her way to the door, a tear threatening to drop. She reached the door before he stopped her, realising in a flash of inspiration that she had misinterpreted his silence as him not loving her or worse.
His hand caught hers as she reached for the doorknob. "You know, seeing as we seem to be taking this out of the room and all. I lied too. I couldn't leave you because I care about you more than I should; in fact so much that I couldn't watch you die. So much that if id have lost you it would have broken my heart, mainly because my heart belongs to you. Always has Sam." the lone tear that had been threatening to slide down her cheek was now joined by many others.
He turned her to him, placing a hand gently under her chin he lifted her gaze to look at him. He saw her tears, wondering if he had said the wrong thing, did she think he was just saying it because he knew he was dying, had she said it for the same reason. He looked back down at her to see her grinning back up at him. He stroked her cheek as she tentatively grasped his free hand and she lent into his touch. As she looked him square in the eye, letting him see all the feeling that had been kept pent up for so long she saw the same feelings reflected back at her. That look that had so long been buried in the room, on apophis' ship, the incident with the entity, after they had been Jonah and Thera. More moments than she could count and that they had both put down to their imaginations.
He leaned in, slowly, giving her time to back out if she had just wanted to clear her mind. To his surprise she met him half way. The kiss was nervous at first, both trying to not push the boundaries still between them too far. As the kiss deepened and their minds went blank as to what was going on around them all boundaries were lost and walls of silence broken. Whatever fate had in store for them tomorrow they still had today and each other. Always.