It's probably best to read this on mobile just because it's a bunch of pointless one-liners. Mobile makes it look longer.
It takes Hikaru 44 steps exactly to get from his bedroom to the kitchen. 44 steps including the hallway, the stretch of stairs, and the walk through the laundry room.
(the whole house used to be big. now it just feels empty.)
41 steps past his doorway, managing to actually get into the hallway.
(his room had become a sanctuary.)
37 to the edge of the stairs. There's a small table and chair off to the corner. A tea platter sits.
(after a week of being untouched, it's probably cold)
36 steps. He counts each one slowly as he walks down.
(one...two...three...four...would flinging himself off the side hurt himself enough?)
26 steps take him to the laundry room. Old clothes sit in piles. He can still smell the fading cologne, but he doesn't dare look at them.
(his mother will never ever throw them out.)
19 steps left. He stops in the middle of the laundry baskets. When did the room get so big? All it needed was a washer and dryer. Couldn't it be smaller?
(he's starting to regret coming down anyway)
9 steps take up the rest of the detergents and vacuums. 10 steps to go. He can almost hear laughter from the next room. Tears start to show from his eyes.
(maybe he's just being delusional. none of this could actually be real.)
His footsteps quicken hurrying to the counters to get tea. He can feel it now. The other one, the one who looks like him will be waiting. Already eating a cookie. Laughing. Always laughing.
He trips on step 8 while walking too fast. He looks down at his feet. To the tiles. To the fridge. He's confused, but shakes it off. He'll be teased for the rest of the day if he doesn't. He's confident on that.
(don't get too confident. you're dreams are about to be crushed.)
He finally looks down at his offender. A pair of white shoes. Pretty K's and H's monogram the sides. Initials. He can't help feeling sick to his stomach but can't help staring either.
(the tears have flowed over now. there's no stopping.)
His last 2 steps are wasted sobbing over the sink and remembering that Kaoru's funeral was 9 days ago.